Chapter 52 Keep Me Company
Lin Yao reached out and grabbed his clothes, his fingers turning white.
"Where do you feel unwell?" Xie Xingchen looked at his pale face, and her heart clenched.
Lin Yao reached out and grabbed the palm that was covering his eyes, pointed to his mouth, and shook his head.
He opened his mouth wide, indicating that he couldn't make a sound.
Xie Xingchen drove over alone, picked up his communicator and put it in his pocket, then bent down and picked him up around the waist: "It's okay. It's normal for you to react this way since it's your first time facing a war scene. It's nothing serious, don't feel ashamed."
Lin Yao looked at him silently, his eyes reddening with gratitude.
Thank you for... for protecting my self-respect.
It was indeed embarrassing. Who would have thought that a top student who used to get full marks in every aspect of military training almost failed the psychological examination?
It is ironic that a soldier would experience a stress response upon seeing corpses everywhere.
"I..." Lin Yao managed to utter a single word, his voice hoarse. "I will overcome it, I will definitely overcome it."
"Don't talk. Wait for me for five minutes. I'll finish the filming for you and then take you back, okay?" Xie Xingchen rubbed his short hair, which was soaked with cold sweat. "Close your eyes and don't think about anything."
Lin Yao obeyed and slowly closed his eyes, but what should have been pitch black turned into a bright fire.
Xie Xingchen looked at the expression on his face and picked up the communicator to give instructions: "He Li, don't come over. Stay where you are and continue the mission. I found Lin Yao, but the communication signal is bad. He's fine."
"Dean Huo, we've run into a little trouble here. I can't go back for the time being. Could you please arrange for someone else to take over my first bandage?"
"Duan Zheng, Li Mao, you two continue to escort the stretcher. Cheng Boyan is in charge of supervising and reporting the progress to me as soon as possible. Once you receive a reply, please do so."
"He Li received it."
"Li Mao received it."
"Cheng Boyan received it."
"Duan Zheng... Received."
Even though no one was designated as the team leader, he had a natural ability to get others to obey orders. He arranged everything in an orderly manner, then jumped out of the car, took the video camera, and finished the work that had just been completed.
Lin Yao listened to his instructions, then opened his eyes again and looked at his back through the glass. His shoulders were broad, as if he could bear anything.
I envy his composure and calmness; he seems unafraid of anything.
Unlike myself...
It appears indestructible on the surface, but in reality, it is riddled with holes.
Lin Yao turned his gaze to the corpses of the soldiers, forcing himself to look at them, at the faces of those who had died young for their territory, just like the test subjects in the laboratory—young and strong lives.
Then it quietly disappeared.
After escaping from that place, he had nowhere to go and was afraid of having nightmares if he stayed alone, so he slept in the park with the stray cats.
At that time, I was mute and couldn't speak, which was perfect since the kitten didn't need to make a sound either.
They lived together peacefully for about half a year until people in the community found and rescued him, and he slowly returned to normal life.
"What are you thinking about?" Xie Xingchen returned with the camera and reached out to touch his forehead. "Still so sweaty."
Lin Yao's heart was pounding so hard he felt like he was going to die. He took out his phone and typed, revealing his true feelings for the first time.
[It was a bit too much for me to face that scene for the first time; I can't speak right now, but I'll be fine soon.]
Xie Xingchen said softly, "It's okay, then don't say anything. I'll take you back to rest."
Before driving, he sent a message to Director Cheng for advice.
【xxc】: What happens if someone suddenly loses their voice in a war zone?
Director Cheng happened to be on the night shift and replied instantly.
[Harmony and Prosperity]: If you lose your voice while in a certain situation, it's probably PTSD, triggered by the situation.
[Harmony and Prosperity Letter]: Lin Yao?
I guessed it right away.
[xxc]: Yes, it's him. He doesn't look well.
[xxc]: Medical care is scarce here, and there's a shortage of doctors, so it'll probably be difficult to find suitable treatment.
[Harmony and Prosperity]: The treatment time is hard to say. It's possible that he'll be better by tomorrow. It's just a physiological trigger, a stress response disorder.
【xxc】: Okay, I understand.
He turned the steering wheel and became silent on the way back.
Some people faint at the sight of blood, and some are afraid of heights, but it's hard to imagine that an outstanding military reserve like Lin Yao would have such a reaction.
What exactly did he go through to leave such severe psychological trauma?
Xie Xingchen felt only heartache.
This was the first time I had ever done anything like this, and I didn't know what to do to ease his pain.
Xie Xingchen's palms were burning hot as he held Lin Yao's icy cold hand, which was almost hypothermic, and teased him, "It seems my illness has come on at a very opportune time. One is cold and the other is hot, so we can help each other out."
Lin Yao gave a forced smile.
Yet I felt my icy limbs slowly warming up, and even though it was still the pitch-black night, it felt like the sunrise was approaching.
Xie Xingchen wrapped his fingers in his palm and transferred his body heat to him: "Just listen to what I'm saying. I didn't sleep last night and I'm a little sleepy while driving. Keep me company."
Lin Yao's attention was slightly diverted, and he nodded slightly.
"When I came here today, I looked pretty cool piloting the aircraft, but you don't know how embarrassing it was when I first took to the air for the first time."
Lin Yao turned his head and looked at him in surprise.
"I couldn't maintain my balance and almost crashed right after takeoff. I fell from a great height and nearly caught fire. I was scared half to death."
"I was afraid of heights for a long time after that, and I didn't dare to touch anything related to flying."
"Because I was afraid of flying, I never considered military academies when applying to universities. Plus, my dad is in politics, so it seemed reasonable for me to go to National Chengchi University. But it took me a year to overcome that fear and I finally got into Chong Ching University." Xie Xingchen comforted him with a mix of truth and lies.
It's true that I used to be afraid of heights, but I went to Chongqing not because I overcame my fear of heights, but because of Lin Yao.
He didn't want to never see the person he liked again in the future.
So I overcame my fear and finally changed my college application despite the difficulties.
Xie Xingchen spoke slowly: "Everyone has things they're afraid of, even I do. So it's normal, you don't need to feel ashamed or embarrassed."
Lin Yao's eyes welled up with tears, and he could only turn his head away, forcing himself to suppress his emotions.
The off-road vehicle slowly drove off the road, and after driving a short distance, headed towards the vast beach.
“You don’t need to be invincible, you know?” Xie Xingchen released his hand, stopped the car, and said softly, “Even if you have a little bit of fear, in my eyes you are still Lin Yao, who is very capable and often tests me.”
Lin Yao stared at him without blinking, feeling as if a piece of his heart had collapsed.
He still felt very cold.
The night was too dark, and the sun had not yet risen, so there was no warmth to be found.
I don't know why the car is parked here, or what he's waiting for.
Lin Yao didn't ask, but just looked at him silently for a long time, but the sky was still dark.
“Let’s wait for the sunrise together.” Xie Xingchen seemed to know what he wanted to ask. “I will always be with you.”
Lin Yao blinked slowly, recalling Xie Xingchen's first wish.
"From now on, you must tell me every time you are unhappy."
After hesitating for nearly half a minute, Lin Yao suppressed the stinging in his eyes, finally raised his hand, and stretched it out towards him, hovering in the air.
Silently mouthing, "Hug me."
Just as she was about to withdraw her hand in disappointment, thinking he couldn't hear or understand, Xie Xingchen pulled her into his arms without hesitation.
Lin Yao felt a lump in his throat, looked up, and saw the sky bright in the distance.
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Goodnight, my little yellow girls, let's go for pure love tonight.
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