Chapter 110 I'll Let You Go
Lin Yao felt a splitting headache.
He suddenly raised his hand and knocked the phone to the ground, his whole being displaying an abnormal kind of terror.
Xie Xingchen reached out and grabbed his wrist: "What's wrong?"
"Xie Xingchen...it hurts...my heart hurts so much..."
Lin Yao felt as if his heart was being squeezed by a pair of giant hands, with countless steel needles piercing his bone marrow. The pain was ten or a hundred times greater than when he was having his blood drawn, causing his whole body to spasm.
Those long-forgotten memories and conversations are now sweeping in like waves.
"01, come over for your blood test. The young master is coming today, so be good."
"01 You look quite pitiful, aren't you? The same age as us, yet such different fates."
"Are you here for treatment too? It must hurt a lot to have blood drawn, here's some candy."
“My dad said I have a very serious illness and need regular blood transfusions to survive. Where do you feel unwell?”
"I hope that when we meet again, we will both be healthy, little 01."
"If you have the chance to go out and play in the future, where would you like to go? I like to have snowball fights, what about you?"
......
Lin Yao only remembers saying at the time, "I've never had a snowball fight, never."
It turns out that person was Xie Xingchen.
He used to hate the rich young master who always gave him a cold shoulder. Because of him, he had endless experiments and blood draws, his arms were covered with needle marks, and every time he opened his eyes, he saw an endless abyss.
How could it be Xie Xingchen?
Anyone can be it, except him.
Xie Xingchen was clearly the one who led me out of the darkness.
"Why are you shaking so badly?" Xie Xingchen lowered his head, lifted his chin with his palm, and carefully examined him. "Is something wrong? Heart? Chest? Can you breathe? Don't hold your breath, Yao Yao."
Lin Yao convulsed, his pupils vacant as if unable to focus, and repeated, "No."
He has PTSD, and he also had symptoms of aphasia before. Xie Xingchen was afraid that something might have happened to him, so he immediately changed the flight destination.
At midnight, the aircraft descended rapidly and came to a sudden stop in an open area outside the hospital.
Xie Xingchen carried Lin Yao downstairs and bumped into Cheng Boyan, who had just gone to Hemu to pick up his father from get off work: "What happened?"
"Director, please take a look. Lin Yao seems to have been agitated." Xie Xingchen handed the person in his arms over.
Director Cheng's vision went black, and he raised his hand to call the nurse: "Take him to the emergency room. I really owe you all this every single day."
The accident happened so suddenly that Cheng Boyan was still in the middle of the snowball fight and asked blankly, "Wasn't everything fine just now? How did it turn out like this?"
"On the way back, I gave him the report, but he probably couldn't accept it."
Xie Xingchen stood at the entrance of Hemu, head down, lighting a cigarette. "These past few days, I've imagined and rehearsed countless reactions from him: hitting me, scolding me, saying hurtful things, breaking up with me. But the only one... the only one I never expected was that he would have a physiological stress response because he couldn't accept it."
Seeing Lin Yao like that broke his heart.
"This means he loves you very much, even Lin Yao himself may not know it."
Cheng Boyan analyzed, "Because it is unacceptable, the body subjectively produces a state of rejection, which is very painful, so the body will take precautions in advance."
Xie Xingchen felt that he had reached a dead end.
He gave a slight twitch of his lips, a dull knife piercing his heart: "I never imagined that one day I would become the source of Lin Yao's rejection."
I thought I was getting closer to the person I loved step by step, and finally I entered his heart.
Now you're being told you can't go near him anymore.
Cheng Boyan cursed, "Why should you bear the consequences when it's not your fault? Is there such an unfair thing in the world?"
Snow fell in the capital as well, drifting down gently. Xie Xingchen looked into the distance, silent.
Director Cheng gave Lin Yao a full physical examination and then called in a psychiatrist. After a series of diagnoses, Xie Xingchen was finally called out of the ward.
“He was greatly traumatized and cannot be stimulated again. He needs to stay away from that matter or that person. He is already in a bad state, with old and new injuries piling up. If he develops an even more serious psychological condition, he will not pass the military test, and his career will be over.”
The doctor advised, "For now, rest for a while and observe the effects of psychological treatment. That's all we can do for now."
Xie Xingchen felt as if his heart was being torn apart. He turned his head and saw a face sleeping peacefully inside, sedated with tranquilizers. He had just been discharged from the hospital, yet he had sent it back here.
He raised his hand to cover his face, his eyes welling up with tears.
“Lin Yao has no parents we can contact, but we will take good care of him,” the doctor said. “Don’t worry about that.”
Xie Xingchen was stunned for a long time before realizing that he hadn't made a promise to the other party, and said in a low voice, "Okay, I won't see him again for a while."
Director Cheng hesitated, but ultimately said nothing, only raising his hand to pat him on the shoulder.
Xie Xingchen stood outside the ward for a long time, not daring to take a step inside. He remained separated from the ward by the glass door, like a heartless rock, yet a desolate chill seeped through the cracks.
After a long while, he finally lowered his head and sent a message to Xie Hengzhi.
[xxc]: I'm leaving tomorrow, following your suggestion, transferring schools and joining the military.
【xxc】：Are you satisfied?
Then, leaning against the wall, he truthfully sent the whole story to Pei Yizhong, the father he still hadn't dared to acknowledge, who was currently the only person he could entrust with his life.
Pei Yizhong rushed over, saw the pale face in the ward, and raised his hand to slap the young man at the door.
Xie Xingchen suddenly closed his eyes.
But the slap didn't fall for a long time.
"He was perfectly fine when he left, all cheerful and happy. How did you manage to turn him into this?" Pei Yizhong's voice trembled. "He was perfectly fine when he left."
"I'm sorry, Uncle Pei, I didn't take good care of him," Xie Xingchen said in a low voice. "Hit me instead, so I can feel better."
Pei Yizhong's left hand hovered in the air for a long time before finally patting his cheek lightly and letting it fall: "Forget it, you're innocent too. I just never expected that my two closest friends would kidnap my child."
The person he once trusted so much, the person whose family he searched the entire planet but never looked into, the person he never doubted even after their falling out, was right here.
"I'm sorry." Xie Xingchen seemed to have said all the apologies he could in his life today. "I'm sorry, I'm really sorry."
"If anyone should apologize, it shouldn't be you. What are your plans after this?" Pei Yizhong stared at the young face, which was always arrogant and spirited, but now showed endless dejection.
"Using this as an excuse, I'll pretend to break up with Lin Yao, on the condition that he still gives me a chance." Xie Xingchen's Adam's apple bobbed.
"Whether Lin Yao still wants me or not, I'm going to do this."
“I will go back to the life my father planned, infiltrate their circle, and find everyone connected to the lab, one by one. I will personally bring those who have hurt Lin Yao to court.”
"I think it's unlikely that I'll find any evidence unless I get involved myself."
Pei Yizhong raised his eyes: "Including your two fathers?"
During the sleepless nights before, Xie Xingchen had made up his mind and nodded slightly: "Including them."
Pei Yizhong was stunned for a long time before reminding him, "When you're far apart, feelings might fade. Lin Yao might not wait for you forever."
"I know," Xie Xingchen said bitterly, "I don't deserve to make him wait for me."
Pei Yizhong turned his back and whispered, "When are we leaving?"
"Tomorrow, I've actually been preparing for our separation for a while now," Xie Xingchen said in a low voice. "Tonight, let me spend one last night with him."
Pei Yizhong didn't say anything more, but turned around and went out to smoke.
After standing outside the ward for a long time, Xie Xingchen still tiptoed in. Just like he often sneaked into Lin Yao's ward before, he carefully lay down next to Lin Yao, his eyes greedily tracing his lover's features, but he dared not wake him up.
I'm terrified of the look of horror in his eyes when he sees me; it'll feel like a knife stabbing into my heart.
"Nurse..." Lin Yao mumbled in his sleep, "It hurts so much, I don't want any more injections, please let me go, please."
Xie Xingchen reached out and pulled him into his arms, whispering, "Yaoyao, don't be afraid, I'll let you go."
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