Chapter 18 This is the route I, Dazai, took to escape!
【
…
My third master was a wealthy man from an enemy country.
Haven't you mentioned the whereabouts of my second master yet? Sorry, it's really hard for me to remember.
We lost that dark war.
While protecting him, I was hit and the main energy transmission pipeline was shattered. They all thought I was dead, and I was just like dead, without any sound.
The data processing center was damaged, and my data was so blurry that it was difficult to distinguish.
But the commander was dead. His head fell in front of me, and his gray eyes looked at me indifferently. Just like when he was alive.
I was picked up by a scavenger. Because all my equipment was shattered and only my head was left intact, I was considered a logistics android.
The chip of an artificial human is very expensive. The enemy country recycled me and replaced my skin with soft artificial skin. They even gave me a beautiful face for aesthetic reasons. My body was so soft and harmless that I almost recalled my busy and peaceful days as a household android.
Unfortunately, that memory was also destroyed in the war.
Who am I?
…
I was auctioned off and bought by a rich man.
My third master was a mentally ill person.
The rich man took me home, downloaded a human-like emotional system for me, but he made me kneel down and put a dog leash on me.
It's really strange, he likes to see the humiliation on people's faces when they are forced, and likes to see the painful looks on others' faces when they oppress others. But he would feel sad and scared because of persecuting others.
Therefore, the artificial human that simulates human becomes the perfect substitute.
However--
I didn't feel humiliated at all.
So he tried to teach me humiliation, but I couldn't learn it.
He tried to teach me love, teach me anger, and teach me sadness.
But I can't learn it and I can't understand it.
Should I learn it? If you can’t learn…
Huh…?
Am I human? ...No, I'm a cyborg.
But aren’t artificial humans human?
I have a family, I have superiors, I can do everything a human can do, am I still not a human?
I asked my master in confusion, and he laughed with a hint of sarcasm. He seemed to have given up on letting me learn how to be a human being. He said with rare patience:
"Everything on you has been replaced. What do you think you are?"
He added:
"Even if you were once a human, can you find a trace of your past in you now? You have been replaced, repaired, reset, and even your programs have been downloaded and deleted repeatedly. There is no trace of your past in you anymore, and even you don't know if you have been replaced. Do you think you are still a soldier or a family member now? Not anymore, not anymore!"
But... am I still me?
My Lord, my great sir, my lovely psychopath, please tell me.
What am I? What do I have left? What is my identity now?
How do you want to modify me, how do you want to update me, what do you want me to become?
I tolerate all your preferences, I perform all your requests, I perfectly achieve everything you want...
So, am I your dog now?
But, my dear master, my friendly friend.
Even if I am your dog, I will wait until you no longer need me and until you die. Wait until I find the next owner, and then the next owner. Update again, replace again, what will I become?
At that time, I am no longer your dog, just like I am no longer a soldier, no longer a member of someone's family.
Who would I be?
What tiny proof of my existence is left to me?
The Ship of Theseus (Part 3)
】
——
Sengenmaku was strolling on the beach in Aomori these days.
Ever since he learned about the rules of the gambling game, his behavior has changed slightly. He was no longer anxious, no longer trying to get more chips, but slowed down, even slow enough to travel all the way to Hokkaido to see a strange child.
His time was quite, quite long.
After all, when he was six years old, in his ignorance, despair and determination, he rashly made a bet with the world:
"Nothing can kill me, and I will live, and live forever."
——He won.
There are many ways to collect rewards according to the rules. Even the world cannot grant immortality to a single person. And the rules that apply to him may trigger changes in fate that transcends the rules and the world.
By interfering in the world, starting riots, and taking away his friends' abilities, he gained semi-immortality.
The world is destroyed, but due to many causes and effects, he came to this world again.
If fate had not gone wrong, then perhaps he would have gained further eternal life in this world.
Or, the world will give him full reward.
He spent a very long time thinking, lying on the tatami for several days without moving. He tried hard to analyze the essence of the world and think about the connections between the timelines. After a long time, he suddenly realized.
The so-called gift from a friend, the so-called trust before death of a friend, the so-called protection of a friend.
Is he trying to take something of the world from them?
His eyes, his power, his blessing, his blood...
Are they all spoils ruthlessly taken from friends?
Just thinking about it made him tremble with disgust and feel so horrified that he almost vomited. It was as if he had the flesh and blood of a living person hanging on his body, yet he had lived for so long, unconsciously and self-righteously.
"Go live a good life."
“Will tomorrow be better?”
"Start as a child and grow up slowly."
Could they understand, with such expectant words, that their end might very well stem from the gamble he hastily made in order to survive?
Did he pull the trigger on the world because he could not bear it anymore, or was it to gain more benefits?
——Anyway, he stopped.
He leaned against the coast of Aomori and watched the rise and fall of the sea. The lighthouse in the distance flickered, from dawn to dusk, and then from dusk to dawn.
He received the news almost on the same night that Tsushima Shuji had the accident. After all, there are so many people coming and going, it would be terrible if they didn’t realize something was wrong.
Is he dead?
He thought so.
Accident? still……?
No matter what, if I really die, I will go back to Yokohama.
However, on the morning of the second day after the incident, there was a knock on the door of the room where they were staying temporarily. The short-haired boy who was supposed to be dead had nothing in his hands and was wearing a large Japanese-style jacket that almost covered his entire body.
After a long journey, his face, flushed from a high fever, was still filled with an excited smile.
He said:
"It's over, can you take me away now?"
"Tsushima, you have a fever." Shusaku frowned.
"...No, there is no Tsushima Shuji. There will be no Tsushima Shuji anymore."
The boy showed a satisfied look
"I am... Dazai Osamu."
From then on, he was Dazai Osamu.
——
"I gave myself seven days to prepare this plan."
This is how Dazai Osamu described his seven days.
——
It only takes seven days to escape from the Tsushima family, and Dazai Osamu only needs to do three things.
Trading, arson, self-immolation.
On the first day after returning, Dazai Osamu went to see his elder brother Bunji Tsushima with three reasons and a plan.
Although his situation was neither good nor bad, in fact, Dazai Osamu's relationship with his brothers was surprisingly harmonious. The one with whom he had the most stable relationship was his older brother, Bunji Tsushima, who was sixteen years older than him.
The father was away from home all year round, and the eldest brother took over the father's position in the family. He understood Dazai Osamu's intelligence best and was able to realize that he was unusual. Over time, they maintained a pretty good relationship.
Pure brotherhood is not solid enough. Nothing in this world is solid.
Except for the benefits.
The eldest brother had been carefully educated since birth. After graduating in his twenties, he started to build momentum and worked hard to take over the political status of the Tsushima family. He is pedantic and loyal. He is also the oldest and most enlightened. So after making plans overnight, Dazai Osamu chose to confront him.
The moment he sat in front of his eldest brother, Dazai Osamu lowered his eyes and smiled faintly.
The first major plan in Dazai Osamu's life officially began.
He proposed to leave the Tsushima family and gave three reasons:
One: He is not important.
Dazai Osamu had three older brothers. Politics and business were assigned to the eldest and second brothers, with the third brother as his deputy, while he and his youngest brother were the most marginalized people. Losing him was not a big loss for the Tsushima family.
Second: He doesn't cause trouble and can take care of himself.
Dazai Osamu announced his decision to fake his death and calmly elaborated on part of his plan, officially tearing off his usual weird and ordinary appearance to reveal his smart and terrifying true face.
Third: He wants to leave here.
No additions, just what he thought.
Faced with the first and second reasons, the eldest brother frowned and prepared to refute. But when the third reason was mentioned, the eldest brother suddenly fell silent.
No matter what, the needs of my younger brother cannot be ignored.
Then the scales were officially balanced, and Dazai gave his final push.
He said that within these seven days, he would deal with the Tsushima family's competitors and ensure that they would not be able to oppose the Tsushima family politically within five years.
...In the end, he received the secret support of the second most powerful person in the family.
When doing business with relatives, perhaps it involves 70% profit and 30% affection, or maybe 50% and 50% or 30% and 70% respectively, but who cares nowadays?
——He doesn't care, he has already compensated.
He only asked his eldest brother to do two things.
First, make sure that my father will not be in Aomori in seven days.
Secondly, prepare two corpses, one similar to him and one from a homeless person.
His brother looked at him silently, with a painful expression in his eyes that he didn't quite understand. But at least this time, this time he completely believed what Dazai Osamu said. He put the interests of his family on an eleven-year-old boy with a desperate determination, like a true politician.
On the second day, I went to see the early cherry blossoms, got lost, and returned home in the evening.
On the third day, warehouses in various places in Aomori caught fire spontaneously. In the early morning, Dazai Osamu sneaked away and returned at daybreak.
On the fourth day, large-scale arson began in Aomori, and it was suspected that the arsonist had done it intentionally. At the fire scene, it was discovered that a certain congressman’s crimes were painted on the gate.
On the fifth day, Dazai Osamu did not go out. Arson occurred in a remote warehouse of some wealthy family. The police station requested support and formally opened a case for investigation.
On the sixth day, Dazai Osamu tried to drown himself in the icy water in the bathtub for two hours, but failed. I developed a high fever that night and got a sleeping pill prescribed by my family doctor. No arson occurred that day.
On the seventh day, I was seriously ill and took medicine and rested in bed.
On the evening of the seventh day, fires broke out in the remote houses of the prominent families in Aomori. Among them, Tsushima Shuji died in his sleep due to the sleeping pills he had taken and being unable to escape.
On the same day, the arsonist was found burning himself at a garbage incinerator. This can be seen from the last words he left behind. Although he committed the crime out of revenge, he actually did not want to hurt a child. He didn't know that Shuji Tsushima had taken sleeping pills and was almost overwhelmed by the guilt of killing his child. At the same time, the dark stories he wrote about the congressman were thoroughly exposed.
From this, a rumor spread that when the fire broke out, a certain congressman was alone in the room with a 12-year-old unrelated girl, and in order to escape, the two left with their clothes in disarray.
Once one corner of the crime has been settled, the rest, whether fabricated or not, will be confirmed one by one by people in the market. Even if they have not done anything wrong, even if they are completely innocent, no one will completely believe them anymore.
That's human nature.
Dazai Osamu used the thing he feared most to almost destroy a prominent family. It only took seven days from the drafting of the plan to its completion.
The honest arsonist who was forced to set himself on fire because he accidentally killed a child was considered: disrespectful, but understandable.
But how innocent was the child who was killed?
Thus, the clues were closed: an unfounded arsonist and a child who escaped. Two important figures withdrew from the plan without any involvement.
——
"To make an incendiary bomb and a time-delay device, you only need a few tools in the kitchen. I made ten timed arson devices and only used eight to achieve my goal. There was no push, no obstacles, it was incredibly smooth. ... The people here are even more boring than I thought."
Dazai was drinking cold medicine and he laughed softly when he said this. That smile contained a sincere admiration for human nature, as well as a deep sense of powerlessness and emptiness.
He murmured in a low voice:
“What a wonderful and beautiful sight.”
——
Early that morning, the eldest brother saw Dazai Osamu off.
The two walked along the beach for a long time, and finally, the eldest brother handed him a box containing valuables and clothes, and a stack of papers.
It is an identity file issued by the congressman himself, and no organization or unit can retrieve it unless the congressman allows it - a resident card.
As well as an anonymous check for one million yen and a note with a phone number on it.
"Bon Voyage."
The eldest brother said.
The eldest brother looked at him in silence. He was standing in the direction of Aomori, with the pedantic and ancient city behind him, wearing a feather robe with the "Tsurumaru" family crest that symbolized glory.
Maybe sadness? Maybe confused? Or maybe it's a feeling of regret for a smart child who wants to escape, mixed with a hint of blessings and wishes for him?
Dazai smiled, turned around, and walked away towards the morning breeze and the rising sun.
He really had a bad cold. He was handling corpses and self-immolation cases late last night, working while sick and feeling even more sick. Now with the sea breeze blowing, he began to have fever again. He felt that he was walking quite fast, but the distance that normally could be walked in an hour took him three hours to walk. It was not until dawn that he found Qianjianmu's temporary residence.
As he walked, he hummed an unknown song and tore the brand new resident card into pieces.
Along with the piece of paper with the phone number on it, it was torn into unrecognizable pieces of paper. Then he raised his hand and scattered the pieces into the sea in the sudden strong wind. The white paper was dotted like stars falling on the sea.
He couldn't help laughing. All those years of self-doubt and pain were crushed and smoothed out by him, filling the grooves in his soul.
Life is painful, and no matter what, the total amount of pain will not change.
He was still in pain, but now—
But I feel freer than ever before.
——
Dazai fell asleep in the middle of his speech. He took some medicine and got a fever-reducing injection, then curled up quietly in the quilt like a cute little bear doll.
The Sengenbaku stayed in Aomori temporarily, even until the funeral of Tsushima Shuji.
Although it was very subtle, Sengenmaku still felt that he should let Dazai Osamu decide whether to attend his funeral. After all, although his father did not come back when he died, his death dealt a severe blow to his opponents and was a great achievement. So the Tsushima family gave him a long-awaited grand funeral.
There must be a lot of people who remember him, and many people send him flowers, hoping that he will pass away soon.
It's such a bad joke.
So Sengenmaku opened the door for Dazai Osamu, and as the door was opened, a strong smell of carbon was smelled.
The doors and windows were closed and the charcoal stove was burning slowly. Apparently Dazai Osamu hadn't figured out the true meaning of charcoal burning suicide, so he didn't seal the doors and windows with tape. But he was smart enough to make preparations for the next situation.
Then Qian Jianmu saw the brown-haired little bear hanging on the beam.
He silently looked up at those peaceful eyes, then slowly, slowly closed the door.
Well, let's hold the funeral together.
Just as the door was closed, there was a loud noise from inside. The thin rope broke, and an unknown object fell to the ground with a thud, knocking over the charcoal basin.
Then you hear the sounds of "ooh," "cough cough cough," and "ooh ooh oo."
Immediately afterwards, Endo Shusaku walked out of the room.
……?
Why are you here?
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