Chapter 51 There is nothing wrong in saving your friends.
Dazai Osamu hates dogs.
The loyal dog sticks out his tongue, shows an admiring expression, wags his tail, and humbly begs for food. Even if he is beaten, he will only whimper and long for love. He hated this existence.
Perhaps it came from the relationship between the guest and his father that he witnessed in his youth, or perhaps he once briefly imitated this posture to pray for attention. As memories fade away, some things are completely forgotten, but this resistance becomes more and more intense, spreading throughout the body like a virus.
Come and see him, the devilish cleverness he exhibits.
Be afraid of him, spit on him, be wary, fearful, and daunted.
Hug with a dagger and beware of traps when getting along. The relationships brought about by emotions are so disturbing; only the cold bonds of interests are strong, lasting and reassuring.
Don't get close, please keep the distance at half a meter.
Hate pain, just keep the pain within a controllable range.
He reveals his worst side completely, and even thinks that he is a completely hopeless rotten person.
See, this is who I am, so don't have any expectations of me, and don't think about having a good relationship with me.
Damp, dark, cruel, and full of internal friction.
Unable to wake up from the corrupt life, he can only watch his body being parasitized by fungi and covered with hyphae called fear and sadness.
…
…
so……
So how can a person like him have friends?
One day I jumped into the water on a whim. I felt very calm, with a faint sense of expectation and more disgust. I drifted aimlessly in the cold water, imagining that when I woke up, everything would be over, and all the heavy burdens of life and fate, even my own soul, could be thrown away in one breath. As a result, when he stretched out his hand, he touched something that was much warmer than the river water. The next moment, the memories of countless worlds overlapped with each other. He could not see clearly what happened, but he only remembered one thing.
He has two friends.
He will have two friends.
He will have two friends for a short time, and then in his long life without a destination, he will be endlessly immersed in the mud of sadness, living a lifeless life.
This is, this is the life of Dazai Osamu.
A long nightmare of nothingness.
He struggled to grab the driftwood and climbed to the shore holding the snow-white cover book tightly in his hand. Dazai Osamu lowered his head woodenly, was silent for a moment, and threw the book back into the river.
"I don't need it," he said.
Just turning around, the book appeared in his pocket. The wide pockets of his long suit coat, which he liked very much, turned out to be the perfect accomplice of this book.
Unable to discard, unable to refuse, memories accumulated layer by layer, memories of eight hundred trillion parallel worlds, were deleted and subtracted and thrown into his mind, he could only be forced to accept it, sometimes he didn't even know what era he was from, only when he woke up one day, he suddenly realized that many things did not happen.
He had nightmares all night long. He dreamed of a dark bar. He was lying on the bar. He noticed someone sitting next to him, so he raised his head and said with a nasal tone, "You're so late, Odasaku."
It was as if all the darkness and internal friction had disappeared. If he was an unfriendly stray cat or dog, then Odasaku was a tree, or an unromantic telephone pole. He climbed up and down casually, and Oda Sakunosuke stood there calmly, neither comforting him nor having any extra emotions towards him. He never felt lost or at a loss, but only felt a sense of relief as if he had found his home.
Sometimes another person would appear, with a delicate look and dark circles under his eyes, who had an incredible expectation and an indescribable indulgence towards the world. He was like a half-hearted idealist, but ended up becoming a corporate slave and dying on the road halfway through his ideals. He is quite rebellious by nature, but he has hidden all his thorns unconsciously, like his short hair that is carefully combed but secretly sticking up, or his sharp eyes that are forcibly concealed by lenses.
Although he always complains about Dazai Osamu and Oda Sakunosuke, he would actually happily participate in them occasionally. His care and concern were very considerate, just the right level of neither excessive nor infrequent. Simple yet complex, depraved yet active, obedient yet rebellious, friendly but... hateful.
Like a woodpecker, he knocks on the tree, banging on it whenever he doesn't like it. When the tree withers, he flies away for survival and future, leaving him alone guarding the withered old tree, quietly watching everything become desolate.
But, but
Hate, hate, but will be friends.
A friend in both the future and past tense.
Then I woke up from the dream, and all I saw was a pitch-black office without a trace of light. The men were waiting outside the door, their breathing trembling with fear. His life is contained in broken film, moving forward or backward as the plot progresses.
So he clenched the pages with his curled fingers and opened the book again. I want to know more, but a lot of the plot has been deleted, and there is nothing left except his miserable life. He was forcibly denied knowledge of future 'social' events, but was ruthlessly informed of the future.
Ha, the future.
That is a world of eight hundred trillion, and no Oda Sakunosuke has a future in which he can survive.
There is no world, no possibility, all the worlds, as if the destined ridiculous plot of "Final Destination" is the only way forward in this world.
No Oda Sakunosuke could survive.
No Oda Sakunosuke could survive.
Whether he ran away, stayed away from Dazai Osamu, or even didn't join the Mafia at all, he was destined to die. There was no other possibility.
If he had never met Oda Sakunosuke, if he had never known this person's existence, then this person's death would be like a fallen leaf outside the window to him, and there would be no need to remember it at all. It is even very likely that he is the instigator of this man's death, the only murderer who sent him to death in order to extract profits. He walks in this sinful life openly, ignoring the bloodstains all over his body, without any psychological pressure.
Isn’t it better if we don’t know each other? Dazai Osamu is a coward who would run away from the whole world if he could.
But, but...
Why should I let him see how I get along with my friends? Why should I let him feel the precious feelings that he would never dare to dream of in his entire life? Why should I let him experience the heart-wrenching pain of losing everything in the end? And then tell him, look, this is it, just accept your fate, this is it.
That's too much.
Isn’t this too bullying?
How could he ignore this? How could he be made to watch the tragedy happen, to witness Oda Sakunosuke reappear in a way he had seen before?
Hey, there are trillions of futures, countless accidents or established facts. Oda Sakunosuke's future is just one of a billion choices, and it will always lead to the established path of death. Even if Dazai Osamu has planned everything, how can he be prepared for hundreds of millions of possibilities? He could only watch everything happen, helpless.
He had no choice, Dazai Osamu had no choice. Dazai Osamu could do everything except the twist of fate.
How could he create a world where Odasaku could live and write books?
Wanna bet? Gamble your own life and destiny, gamble this vain life, gamble everything, make a hopeless attempt, try to give Oda Sakunosuke a future in which he can survive?
Dazai Osamu's life was full of dislike, and even his own existence seemed so meaningless.
Haha, he doesn’t even recognize this person now!
What on earth is he existing for?
…
…
I can only...
**
"It's been a while since we last met. Do you want to meet?"
It was probably in the afternoon when I suddenly received a call from Dazai Osamu.
The gloomy weather was perfect for being alone. Qian Jianmu was thinking about a new book. He put the phone to his ear with one hand and drafted a new article with the other.
It was a new book called "Never Night".
Here are a few lines of jottings:
"Less than an hour of continuous sleep, stay away from tall buildings, crave bright light and special medicine."
"There will be nothing left in our future. We probably just live in pain because we don't want to die. With that in mind, it's time to end it."
"This world is an endless dream, and death is the only way to wake up. Don't you think so?"
"Today? The weather is terrible today."
"I understand, I understand. It's true that I've met too many people and have been completely forgotten by Mu Jun. I understand. Just let me be alone. It's okay for me to be alone. Although the wind is cold, I'm alone, and it seems like it's going to rain, but it's okay for me to be alone. I'm sorry for disturbing Mu Jun by calling him suddenly. As long as I can see that Mu Jun is fine, I will..."
"... Stop, don't say anymore... I'm already on my way out." Qian Jianmu covered his face, feeling very complicated for a moment.
Dazai Osamu's growth direction is a mystery. He always jumps back and forth between Jibai Cat and Black Mud Spirit from time to time. I don't know when he activated the Green Tea skill, but there is nothing strange about it on him. Sengenmaku often wondered who made Dazai Osamu like this, but after searching the entire shrine, there was no abstract character that could bring out Dazai Osamu. It was really hard for him to grow up like this. Instead of blaming himself, it would be better to put all the blame on Mori Ogai.
Damn Mori Ogai, look at what Dazai Osamu has been raised to be.
When we arrived at the river, Dazai Osamu was bending down to unbandage his wrist in the cold wind. He didn't know when it started, but the frail appearance he had when he left the Tsushima family was fixed on him, and even got worse. The bandages that were once sparse now covered half of his body.
Endo once laughed at Dazai Osamu, saying that asking Dazai Osamu to remove a bandage was no different from taking off his clothes. Dazai Osamu shouted back, saying, "What's wrong with bandaging an injury?" "Stepping back, isn't there anything wrong with clothes?" "As long as the bandage is wrapped for a long time, it's his clothes and who would question it?" Anyway, it was a mess and everyone burst into laughter, with a cheerful atmosphere inside and outside.
Dazai's cheeks are now less round, but his outstanding appearance shows that he will be a star in the future.
After all, many years have passed.
Seeing him coming, Dazai Osamu raised his head and threw away the bandage. The strong wind blew the white cloth away, far away towards the river, where it spun in the air and finally, as if irresistible, fell straight into the river, wetted by the water, and floated wetly on the water.
"Maku-kun," Dazai spoke softly, his expression looking odd at first glance, but upon closer inspection, it was no different from usual.
"What's wrong?" Qian Jianmu walked up to him.
They hadn't seen each other for a long time. Although he knew that his eyes had been replaced, when he saw the real Asakane, Dazai was stunned for a moment and suddenly laughed.
"Sure enough, this color suits you better, God-sama."
"You haven't given up this title yet?" Qian Jianmu sighed helplessly.
"God will bring a miracle." Dazai Osamu raised his hands and clapped twice. "Please bless me."
"Okay, okay, I bless you."
Then there was some rambling conversation:
…
"Actually, I didn't want to go with you at first. I wanted to see what you had to say. If you were unhappy, I would take you away."
"is that so."
"That's right. The result really surprised me."
"That's okay, isn't it?"
…
"I'm afraid I won't be returning to the shrine for a while."
"Because of Mori Ogai?"
“Well, there is also this factor.”
"Are you going to inherit the Port Mafia?"
"Please spare me, I don't want to be a bald man"
…
"I hate you guys."
"Yeah, I see."
“Super annoying.”
"Okay, okay, so we're going back to eat crabs?"
…
…
During the illogical conversation that seemed like lazy complaints, Dazai Osamu seemed to suddenly remember something and inadvertently took out a white book from his arms.
"Want to see it?"
Qian Jianmu didn't think twice and wanted to take it, but the hand was retracted. His expression froze slightly, and he looked up at the boy opposite him. The boy looked at him with a smile, as if he was joking, but the look in his eyes was extremely serious. He smiled and asked again:
"Want to see it?"
The warning from Ayatsuji Yukito reappeared in his ears, but just as Ayatsuji Yukito predicted, Sengenmaku didn't care about the possible dangers and troubles.
"You hope I can help you." He said firmly
“I don’t know what’s going to happen.”
"It doesn't matter. Haven't you already made your decision?"
The smile faded, unknown messages were exchanged in the eyes and breathing, the two looked at each other in silence, the atmosphere was terribly stiff.
The white-haired boy seemed to have thought of something and suddenly became expressionless. He stretched out his hand, and the lack of a smile on his face brought an extraordinary sense of distance, and the sudden drop in emotional temperature was more biting than the cold wind.
It was the first time he used a commanding tone, and his eyes were as sharp as a blade, cutting off all emotions.
"Bring it here." He uttered the command.
This time, Dazai Osamu handed over the book.
The white book without a cover had just fallen into the boy's hands when it suddenly broke into specks of white light and swarmed into the boy's body.
Zero sounded a sharp alarm in his brain, red warnings were everywhere, and the input of a large amount of data overwhelmed his consciousness. Chijianmaku's pupils suddenly lost their luster, and his body staggered forward and fell. Dazai Osamu supported him, and the hand holding him became tighter and tighter, almost leaving purple-red marks.
"……really……"
Many things are clear to Dazai Osamu.
The friends are real, the stories are real, the whole thing is fake.
——Only in this way will he go to find Senjianmu.
Because in his world in the book, there is no Qianjianmu.
Whether Dazai Osamu can realize this is inevitable.
Will Dazai Osamu hand the book to Sengenmaku while realizing this? ……inevitable
Can Chimaemaku accept this book even though he realizes it is wrong? inevitable.
Everything is inevitable. Everyone's personality is taken into account, including Dazai Osamu's considerations and calculations, Chimamaku's obedience, and the precise calculations that are linked together.
…
It seemed that everyone agreed with each other and the decision seemed extremely normal. Everything was correct except for the use of the Thousand Screens.
but……
It’s so disgusting. I want to vomit. It’s so disgusting.
He actually became the one who handed the knife to hurt Qian Jianmu.
Taking advantage of Chigenmaku's calm and tolerance for his own purposes.
…
so……
It's only natural that Mujun is angry, right?
It's normal to be angry, right?
...Maybe I can’t go back to the shrine.
Ha, what are you looking forward to?
**
Putting aside Dazai Osamu who had fallen into extreme self-loathing and depression, after a brief brain reboot, Chimamu finally understood what was going on.
This is the confrontation between world consciousness and him.
But the world consciousness did not seem to have the confidence to expel him from the world, and chose to give up after a brief attack. Instead, we turned to data communication and tried to cooperate with him to seek the possibility of common survival and maintaining world stability.
Although he had known that the world consciousness would cause trouble for him one day, Qian Jianmu had not expected that this trouble would be so... useless.
The fact that Dazai Osamu became the victim of the game between the two parties was beyond his expectations and made him feel deeply uncomfortable.
It made him a little angry.
Zero's brain was overloaded with data processing and his body temperature rose again. However, this time Senjianmaku had more time. He tried hard to wake up and finally made some space to think. He could feel that Dazai Osamu's body was trembling as he held him, which made him feel helpless.
"…What are you afraid of? I won't lose."
He spoke in a low voice, almost as if in a whisper, so as not to frighten the frightened animals.
Hearing his voice, Dazai Osamu looked up suddenly and faced him.
He pursed his lips tightly. He was just fifteen years old, still very young, and did not have the confidence and calmness of an adult. Although his face showed a cold and calm expression, his eyes looked as if he was about to cry.
It seems that during those few minutes when he lost consciousness, Dazai Osamu almost exhausted himself to death. He is a person who is prone to internal exhaustion and overthinking. Although his nature is relatively pure and kind, he can easily fall into the abyss if he is not careful. If he didn't wake up, Chiganmaku was really worried that Dazai Osamu would jump into the river with him in his arms.
The memory of friendship with Dazai Osamu in the brain has been analyzed, and more data is still being analyzed. Although he had not yet fully understood the source of the matter, he had already fully understood Dazai Osamu's struggle and pain this time. He tried to say something to calm Dazai Osamu's emotions.
"You said so much just now, are you planning not to go back to the shrine?"
“…”
"You didn't tell me directly. Are you afraid that I would refuse, or are you afraid that I would agree?"
“…”
"I'm not angry with you. I should apologize to you."
“…”
"Saving a friend is a good thing. There is nothing wrong with the act of saving a person."
Qian Jianmu paused and asked softly:
"Do you want to save me?"
Dazai Osamu, who was as cold and stiff as a statue, pursed his lips and nodded slowly.
Just at this moment, Qian Jianmu suddenly thought of the future in his memories.
Even though the world consciousness wanted to use Dazai Osamu, he did not reveal everything. This so-called "book" does not connect the world, it is just a carrier of memory, carrying a little bit of energy that can form a supernatural singularity with Dazai Osamu, and it contains only infinite friendship and despair.
The world's bargaining chip is: Oda Sakunosuke is the ending point of this world. No matter which parallel world he is in, he will die anyway and there will be no way to survive.
So he couldn't possibly live.
If you want Oda Sakunosuke to survive, you must persuade the world to change its ending point. If only the ending point of the world could be changed, Dazai Osamu's friendship would not have died so early, and Oda Sakunosuke would have escaped the inevitable death.
It was really too much. In order to establish a connection with him and to strengthen his bargaining chips, he used cruel reality to stimulate Dazai Osamu and used Dazai Osamu to negotiate with him.
But if he doesn't save him, Dazai Osamu will be as good as dead after losing his friend. Isn't this the same lonely soul as him?
There's nothing wrong in saving a friend, he thought.
The bonus brought by the high body temperature made Zero's processing speed faster and faster, and Qian Jianmu gradually understood the nature of this world.
The doubts of the past have been completely resolved. The so-called prediction that once puzzled him was indeed as Ranpo said. It was nothing more than the parallel world clearing the mines first, and then letting the main world copy the road of the parallel world to achieve an absolutely safe future.
Around the main world, the only origin, trillions of parallel worlds that serve as stepping stones for the main world rotate endlessly.
At the end of the day, this world is a terrible, unadventurous, and insecure wasteland.
As early as the moment his divine power forcibly crushed into the main world, those parallel worlds were no longer useful. Since he does not exist in the parallel world, there is absolutely no way to simulate a future with him.
Because of his existence, all the ending points, destinies, and established trajectories have all disappeared.
In the end, the only thing left to make a deal with him was this crucial ending point, which was worthless now.
Loss-making business.
but……
There is absolutely nothing wrong with saving your friends.
"It's okay, leave it to me then."
Chijianmu raised his hand, and the heat of his body made everything he touched cold. He touched Dazai Osamu's forehead and showed a calm but very serious expression, as if there would be no accidents at all and everything would go as he planned.
"I will liberate your friends from the mortal futures of all parallel worlds."
So don't give me that ghostly expression anymore.
…
——However, at the same moment when Qianjianmu communicated with the world.
Dazai Osamu, the world's biggest bug monster, the mafia leader who forcibly created a parallel time and space rift because of his supernatural power of absolute anti-supernatural power, sat in the empty bar of his own imagination and opened the book that changed the trajectory of his entire life.
He was pale and thin. The blood-red scarf was like a blood-stained sling, tightly binding his life.
The 'book' is something that connects to the origin of the world. Although the world consciousness erases the main world from it, when the world consciousness communicates with the Thousand Curtains, the main world will briefly appear on the pages of the book.
For the leader Dazai Osamu, it was a brand new world that he had never seen before, even a few years earlier than the main world he thought it was.
"...Hmm? Who is Chigenmaku?"
It was a lazy, drawn-out voice with a faint nasal tone, belonging to an adult.
"...your friends...all parallel worlds...liberated..."
This created fantasy space suddenly became dead silent.
"……ha?"
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