Chapter 81: Keeping Yourself Alone Can't Protect Others
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…
Since then, no matter where I go, there is always this little tail following me.
After the breakdown, he fell into a long period of uncontrollable depression. He didn't say anything, just followed me. No matter whether I forced him to swing the knife at me or chased him away, he just had a very sad expression and looked at me eagerly.
Dirty adults have lots of dirty jobs, and wanted criminals have to eat too.
When I completed the assassination mission, I left him in the temporary residence. He sat obediently in the corner of the dim room. When I came back, he was still there.
I threw the special nutritional paste over to them, and they looked at each other in bewilderment. Biting the food that tasted like sweet and bitter mud, I couldn't get used to this thing no matter how long I tried. At this moment, he suddenly asked me:
“Why betray the government?”
"Why what?"
"You are the commander-in-chief, the idol of the people, you have all the fresh food to choose from, money and treasures, but you take the initiative to come here to suffer. Why?"
"When I woke up one day, I felt a little pain in my chest."
"Then what?"
"I betrayed him because I was very upset, that's all."
He didn't quite understand, and he huddled in a corner with his head down, thinking about the relationship between the two, his long red hair tangled up in a mess behind his neck. The sky outside the window was an unusually dark red, suggesting that there was a fire burning in the distance. I took out the notebook the writer gave me. Since I didn't know what to write, I started writing down my income details, how much money I made, when and where I made it, and then added the number of deaths in the worst case scenario.
Flipping through the pages and looking at the increasingly pitiful figures, I began to sigh like ordinary people: the economic downturn is really terrible.
"I'm leaving now, kid."
So suddenly, I said.
Allowing him to stay for so long was already my limit. To be honest, if I didn't abandon him on the road, I would be crazy.
He was silent, and when I was about to fall asleep, he suddenly whispered:
"Can you wait a little longer?"
I was so sleepy that I turned over and said:
"nerve."
My attitude was very clear, and I concluded that we had reached a consensus. This child inherited his father's wisdom and physique, so he was able to survive no matter what. So I didn't go back to the place where I lived for the next half month.
I didn't expect to hear noisy sounds when I passed by the abandoned settlement again.
Abandoned houses always have new temporary owners. Inside the house, there are sounds of passing robbers drinking and having fun. The smell of alcohol and the noise are mixed with the soft moans of women. The boy just sat at the door, bruised and blue from being beaten, with lifeless eyes staring at the ground, like an abandoned puppy that had fallen into the water.
There was no one to watch over him, and he could leave whenever he wanted. Even the robbers themselves didn't understand why they couldn't drive the child away, so they simply left the child outside to fend for himself.
I walked over, squatted in front of him, and said nothing.
He looked at me and his eyes lit up. Even though I was the murderer of his father, he looked at me as if I were a savior.
"Why do the rebels rebel?" I asked.
"No one has the right to deprive us of our future, no one has the right to take away our power. The people must resist, resist all injustice. Destroy the regime, flatten the chaebol, eliminate evil, and return fairness and justice to the people."
"Then why didn't you resist?" I asked again.
He said nothing and buried half of his face in his sleeves. I was getting tired of waiting, so I stuffed a gun into his hand and kicked the door open.
The robbers turned their heads in horror, and amidst the bloody screams, I left one of them alive.
"Aren't you a rebel? These are the people who oppress you."
He was scared half to death, his lips moved, and although he was holding the gun properly, he was shaking so much that he couldn't hold the gun.
"I want, I want to save, I want to protect them..." His tears hit his sleeves.
"They are the ones who hurt you."
Walking up behind him, I put his finger on the trigger:
"It's not one group that oppresses you, it's everyone."
Amid the loud noise, the boy's clear eyes turned bloodshot and his soul was chopped into pieces and forced to fit into this bizarre society.
"Welcome to grow up. This is the most just rule of survival in the new era."
…
"Despise the weak and shoot the wicked.
There is nothing unforgivable because people condone the occurrence of atrocities.
Violence is another way of writing resistance.
If you don't think this way, you won't be able to survive in this world. "
Turn off the light and put the notebook back on your chest.
There was a hot, fishy smell in a house where someone had died. When I closed my eyes, I always felt like someone was looking at me.
The red-haired boy was lying on the ground. The house was not big to begin with, and one meter away from where he was lying was a body that had been shot.
He couldn't sleep and tossed and turned.
"When did you start killing people? And why did you kill people?"
“When I learned from 1 to 100, they told me that this was a compulsory course.”
I was very young at that time. The teacher took me to a room with a smile, pointed at the person opposite and said, "You can do whatever you want."
The child didn't understand anything at all. When he heard the torture instruments and wailing, he was frightened. So the teacher had someone cover the man's mouth and told me not to be afraid.
I don't know why, I feel confused and panicked. But the compulsory course lasts for an hour, and after an hour, your eyes will be stained red. In order to complete the class assignment, I used a knife, but I didn't have enough strength, and it took a long time for me to walk out covered in blood.
So I was praised and felt very happy. I heard the teacher say, "You did a great job. Let's study it in depth in the next class?"
The final assignment is to kill a person with fear and pain without causing fatal injuries. The next class is about mechanics and tactics, where students learn to make torture instruments or create battle formations. The ultimate goal is to use the knowledge learned to determine how to kill a person and how to make him or her die painfully.
Immersed in death all day long, death and pain are simply means to achieve the goal, and by making good use of different degrees of death, you can get the victory you want. It was not until I joined the war that I realized that it was not the case. No one thought that way, but it was too late by then, right?
…
“—That’s terrible.”
“I’m really a terrible person.”
"I'm not talking about you. This world and this government are terrible."
He couldn't stop shaking, his voice was filled with tears, and he sobbed softly:
"If you want to live, do you have to learn this law of survival?"
We both know the answer, he has never seen a normal person on the road he has followed me. Those who want to live, unless they abandon society and live in seclusion waiting to die like the old writer, have no choice but to take out their guns.
Along the way, he became more and more silent, and the more he saw the scenes of this hell on earth, the more confused he became.
"So this is enough? Nothing else matters now?" The world collapsed, and he seemed to be crying and laughing.
I can only answer this:
"As long as you can survive, that's enough. But if there's something you want to change, if there's someone you want to change, you have to go a little further. If you can't do that, just give up killing and wait for death in your dreams."
He was silent for a long, long time and did not sleep all night.
In the morning, before daybreak, the boy was lying straight on the floor like a corpse.
"Axioms are rotten, chase the light and drive out the darkness," he said.
I remember this quote, it’s from the heart of the resistance.
The boy looked at me, his eyes were still young and innocent, but it was as if he had grown up overnight, and something unknown had settled in them.
He still followed me, very silently, and looked no different. But one day, to protect me, he pulled the trigger.
When he put down the gun, he gave a bitter smile.
Later he said:
“I want to change the world.”
"If you want to protect others, you can't just stand by and do nothing."
The boy was unpolished, but after painful grinding, his sharp edges gradually revealed themselves, emitting a dazzling blood-red light.
…
"I've become a murderer again."
I wrote this in my notes that day.
Eventually, his words came true.
Destiny is a series of interlocking gears, and an invisible hand is laying a dense net in secret.
From then on, every detail of the ending can be traced.
Yes, that's right.
Everything follows the law of cause and effect. You can’t blame others for your consequences.
…
——Excerpt from "Meaningless Literature" Part 3
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**
"Is the department's clock lately...?"
Such whispers have been circulating recently in the Yokohama branch office building of the Military Police.
I don’t know when it started, but I feel like the clocks in the department are breaking down very quickly.
I have no idea whose time is correct. Sometimes, even though I have only worked for a whole day, I feel as tired as if I had worked for several days.
The people above said that it seemed to be the result of the confiscation of some creature with special abilities, and it was not a big deal.
"So the gentleman said that we don't have to look at the watch for the time being and can leave when it gets dark. Isn't that good?"
"So the supernatural power can have such an effect..."
"Although there is a special ability department, I didn't have a specific feeling at all. Now I can finally feel it."
Whispering and chattering.
Although all members of the military and police are soldiers, there is still a lot of working-class flavor among the civilian staff. After chatting in groups of three or five, all those things were forgotten. Anyway, the matter of super powers has not been publicized much, so it is normal that they don’t understand it.
Soon no one paid attention to the broken clock, and another rumor emerged.
Ooka-kun, who worked on the third floor, committed suicide.
The suicide took place on the eighth floor of a hotel in Yokohama. He fell from a high altitude and was smashed to pieces. Although this incident was a bit sudden, after chatting with people around me, I found that there were signs of this happening a long time ago.
Kazuya Ooka is in a very critical position. He is not talkative, but very serious. A few days ago...Huh? It feels like it was already several months ago. In short, he started to become neurotic a long time ago, feeling something was wrong here and there. When I work, I always stare at something intently. The office is full of clocks, many of which are actually broken.
So suicide isn't surprising, right? Is the work too hard?
But soon after, rumors of ghost sightings began to circulate in the hotel where the suicide took place. People nowadays are really good at making up stories. It's so pitiful that Mr. Ooka can't rest in peace even after his death.
Whispering and chattering.
No ill intention, just sighing.
"Oh, by the way, who is on duty today?"
People whose faces could not be seen were chatting.
"Is it Ooka-kun?"
We were just talking about that person's death, but for some reason we suddenly became accustomed to his resurrection.
Keiko Yamaura's face was pale and she was trying hard to suppress the trembling of her fingers. A few days ago, she and Ooka-kun had a mission, so they checked into that hotel.
But just when she went downstairs to buy food, Ooka fell to his death in front of her.
Her boss was worried that she would have a psychological burden, so she gave her a few days off, but for some reason, when she returned to work after the vacation, some things started to feel strange.
"Yamaura?"
"fine……"
Keiko Yamaura walked stiffly to the door, and just then Ooka-kun passed by. She gently touched Ooka-kun's arm, which was warm.
...How is that possible.
Ooka suddenly turned around and grabbed her wrist. His white eyeballs were filled with red bloodshot. His voice was very low, but it sounded as if he was hoarse.
"You figured it out, didn't you?"
Wha…what?
The colleagues around laughed and made surprised noises when they saw this scene. But the next moment, Ooka-kun suddenly disappeared.
A colleague's voice reached her ears:
"That day, Ooka-kun suddenly stopped you. Was it you two...? You seemed to be distracted today. Don't be too sad..."
…
No, nothing is right. Nothing is right.
time? Time was replaced?
Yamaura lowered his head and looked at his ladies' watch.
It was a ladies' watch she had just bought, and she had spent a lot of money on it because the clocks in the office building were always breaking down. But soon after she bought the watch, it became inaccurate and she was confused for a while.
She had also seen the clock hands spinning madly, but she didn't feel anything at the time. But now looking back, I don’t know why, but I suddenly felt a chill behind me.
The phone suddenly rang, it was Ooka-kun.
His hand shook and the phone suddenly fell to the ground and broke into pieces.
**
A brand new map of Yokohama was hung on the whiteboard of the Armed Detective Agency at some point.
Starting from the Hound office building, the epidemic spreads radiating to the whole of Yokohama along with the occurrence of suicide cases.
Behind the whiteboard hangs a map of Japan. On the map, with Aomori as the origin, suicide cases in the surrounding areas also show a radial expansion.
The expansion methods of the two are exactly the same.
There are many red dots marked on the map of Japan. These red dots are the origins that have been investigated and are brewing. In a few months or a few years, the whole of Japan will fall into chaos.
As the young man bit the chess piece and smiled, the time disaster began to spread in earnest.
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