Chapter 17 Look at me and cry.
Yu Shu carried the water bottle straight to the emergency staircase, irritably unbuttoned her collar, and couldn't resist taking out a cigarette to smoke.
Yu Shu's heart aches terribly whenever she thinks about how difficult things were for Shen Zhen. Her grandmother and Tuan Tuan are her weaknesses. If she takes good care of these two people, will Shen Zhen stay by her side forever?
A moment later, with a creak, the door behind them was pushed open from the outside.
Yu Shu didn't turn around. Two slender, fair arms wrapped around her waist, and Chen Zhen's face gently pressed against Yu Shu's back. "A Shu, thank you."
Yu Shu said he went to fetch water but never came back, which is how Shen Zhen found her way here. Yu Shu was so good to her grandmother and Tuan Tuan that Shen Zhen almost thought Yu Shu actually still loved her.
Yu Shu stiffened, gave a bitter smile. Was all she could say was "thank you"? But she couldn't bring herself to ask. What she wanted was never Shen Zhen's gratitude.
Yu Shu straightened his body, slowly turned around and hugged her tightly, as if he wanted to meld her into his body.
Shen Zhen was enveloped in the familiar scent of women's cigarettes, a cool yet reassuring fragrance that made her instantly limp in Yu Shu's arms. She asked softly, "Yu Shu, what's wrong?"
Yu Shu released Chen Zhen and met her clear black and white eyes, which showed concern and affection. She raised her hand and gently pinched her small nose, and said with a smile, "It's nothing. I just heard about what happened to a certain child in the past, and it made me feel very sorry for him."
Shen Zhen's mouth was slightly open, her arms wrapped around Yu Shu's waist. She looked up at Yu Shu with a blank expression, unconsciously snuggling closer to her. "It's alright..."
"After all the hardships I faced before, why did they take me back?"
Shen Zhen buried her face in Yu Shu's arms and chuckled secretly, her eyes sparkling. She pretended to be serious and said, "I originally wanted to rescue you and see if I could sell you." But inwardly, she thought, "You really should look in the mirror and see how handsome you really are! It's because you're handsome, and more importantly, a handsome girl, that I rescued you! If you were even a little uglier, or the wrong gender, none of this would have happened..."
Shen Zhen, a freshman in college, had long discovered her sexual orientation and kept her distance from everyone to avoid being seen as an outsider. That is, until she met Yu Shu, who had been abandoned in the alleyway on her way home. For those three years, Shen Zhen was incredibly grateful to have saved Gu Yu Shu; it was Yu Shu who slowly brought her broken heart back to life.
Yu Shu lowered his head and nestled in Shen Zhen's neck, rubbing against her like a large dog. His soft, moist lips brushed against her sensitive earlobe, making Shen Zhen almost lose her balance. She shrank her neck and laughed as she dodged away.
"Zhenzhen, do you know? There are many benefits to being with me," Yu Shu suddenly said in a low voice, her tone deep and seductive.
Shen Zhen froze, her heart pounding. She tilted her head slightly, trying to see the expression in Yu Shu's eyes, but could only see her pretty, delicate chin. She hadn't even figured out what Yu Shu meant.
Yu Shu took her hand and walked outside, saying, "Let's go back. Dr. Luo will be here soon."
The hospital corridor was dimly lit, and Shen Zhen used to always feel a chill when she walked through it. But now, the warmth of Yu Shu's palm reached her heart, and for the first time, it didn't feel so scary. Looking at Yu Shu's beautiful profile, Shen Zhen couldn't help but think that perhaps Yu Shu still loved her a little bit, even just a little, and that would be enough to sustain her through life. She so hoped that many years later, as old women, they could walk hand in hand down the hospital corridor, and in their twilight years, they wouldn't regret the decisions they made in their youth, and that in their final moments, the love of their lives would be by their side.
Back in the ward, Dr. Luo was already inquiring about Grandma's condition. All the tests had been done through a special channel, and the results would be available that afternoon. Shen Zhen and Yu Shu had been staying with her at the hospital the whole time.
In the afternoon, Dr. Luo called Yu Shu and Shen Zhen out alone, seemingly wanting to say something but then stopping himself.
Yu Shu gently grasped Shen Zhen's hand and looked at Dr. Luo, saying, "Dr. Luo, you can tell us directly if you have any questions."
Dr. Luo took out the report, frowned, and said, "Mr. Gu, the old lady is now in the late stage of stomach cancer and has long been on the verge of death. I suggest that she continue with conservative treatment to alleviate her suffering."
Shen Zhen swayed slightly. She could understand every word the doctor said, but she couldn't quite grasp what it meant when they were put together.
Yu Shu grabbed Shen Zhen's waist to keep her from falling and whispered comfortingly, "Zhenzhen, don't be afraid, I'm here."
Shen Zhen's lips trembled uncontrollably, and tears welled up in her eyes. Because Dr. Luo had been holding back his emotions, she asked in a trembling voice, "Dr. Luo, how much longer does my grandmother have?"
Dr. Luo tapped the table. "At least six months. If the old lady has a strong will to live, she might last longer. It's hard to say. Madam Gu, please rest assured, I will take full care of the old lady's health."
Shen Zhen was completely focused on her grandmother's illness and didn't pay any attention to being addressed as Dr. Luo. Yu Shu, who was standing nearby, heard everything clearly and gave Luo Hao an approving look, saying that the Gu family could sponsor any equipment needed.
After learning about her grandmother's condition in detail from Dr. Luo, Yu Shu took Shen Zhen to the hospital rooftop.
The wind was strong on the rooftop, and for some reason, Shi Tiesheng's warm words flashed through Shen Zhen's mind. She shielded her forehead and reached out as if to touch the clouds further away, but instead of clouds, she received Yu Shu's warm palm.
Shen Zhen thought, if only she were the one who was sick, then she wouldn't have to be so tired. She might be sad, but she wouldn't be in so much pain. And there would be one less person in the world who cares about her.
Yu Shu hugged Shen Zhen tightly from behind, as if she knew what Shen Zhen was thinking. Yu Shu simply said, "Zhenzhen, I'm so glad you're healthy without me. Let's take care of Grandma together, so she can spend her last days happily, okay?"
With red eyes, Shen Zhen asked, choking back tears, "A-Shu, there are so many happy old ladies in the world, why are they all fine? Why is it that... why is it that my grandmother is sick? I don't understand, I really don't understand."
Unconsciously, Yu Shu tightened her grip and coaxed softly, "Zhenzhen, don't think like that. You still have me, you still have me."
Helplessly, Shen Zhen leaned against Yu Shu's chest, biting her lower lip tightly to suppress her emotions.
Yu Shu lifted her chin and pried open her teeth little by little with his fingers. His dark eyes were full of concern as he said with heartache, "Chen Zhen, look at me and cry."
Tears streamed down her face, and Shen Zhen kept clutching Yu Shu's sleeve to wipe them away. But sometimes, when tears come, there's no stopping them. The more she wiped, the more they flowed, and Shen Zhen cried even harder. Let her be unrestrained this once...
Yu Shu said nothing, just held her tightly, letting her cry her heart out. Her Zhenzhen didn't have to be strong in front of her; she could cry whenever she wanted, and Yu Shu was willing to accept all of Zhenzhen's emotions.
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