Xiao Xingyu poked his head out from under the quilt and met Zhang Moyan's eyes in the darkness. Suddenly, he felt like a concubine in the harem had been picked and favored.
Like a giant caterpillar, it crawled further into the bed and pushed the pillow in. The huge empty space proved its great enthusiasm.
Zhang Moyan placed the pillow next to him, came up with the blanket, spread the blanket flat, and lay down next to Xiao Xingyu while brushing her long hair to her chest.
Xiao Xingyu's nose was immediately filled with a faint fragrance of hair, the scent of their shampoo.
Zhang Moyan looked at the ceiling of the bed in the dark. It seemed that she got into bed just to continue chatting, or that she came over because she felt sorry for him and missed his mother. But as soon as she lay down, someone's powerful presence robbed all the air around her, and her mind was blank for a long time.
It had been quiet for too long, and it seemed as if there was a huge barrier between the two of them. This was not the state Xiao Xingyu wanted when he coaxed the person over.
"Mo Yan, do I have a fever?"
Just when Zhang Moyan thought Xiao Xingyu might have fallen asleep, his muttering suddenly sounded beside her.
Zhang Moyan was startled when she heard this and quickly sat up to look at him: "Really? Do you have a thermometer in your room?"
"Can you please touch it first?" Someone's voice was weak. He took her right hand and placed it on his forehead.
Zhang Moyan felt it carefully and said helplessly, "I can't feel it. I'll go see if there is a thermometer in the medicine box."
As he was about to leave, he was grabbed and pulled back onto the pillow: "Don't go, I think it might be a low-grade fever."
"still……"
"I said no!" He said in an impatient but unyielding tone.
Zhang Moyan had no choice but to lie down again and take her hand back, but she still looked at Xiao Xingyu with some worry.
"Okay, okay, I lied to you." Xiao Xingyu was too lazy to pretend.
Zhang Moyan was puzzled: "Why did you lie to me?"
Xiao Xingyu said nonchalantly, "You seem so nervous, let's liven up the atmosphere."
Zhang Moyan's throat choked: "How could I be nervous?"
"Oh, then I misunderstood. That's right, I almost forgot how passionate and unrestrained you are. How could you be nervous?" Xiao Xingyu seemed to be talking to himself.
Zhang Moyan's ears were buzzing, and she felt that even if he didn't have a fever, her ears would be burning.
However, after he made such a fuss, the atmosphere of estrangement seemed to have eased a lot.
"Teacher Xiao, you haven't told me when you will come back to study celadon porcelain?"
Xiao Xingyu looked at her and dared not refute or verify his nonsense. He could only change the subject as if to cover up his shame. He felt an indescribable sweetness.
How can it be so cute?!
"Your question is quite insightful," Xiao Xingyu said seriously. "You've directly assumed that I'll come back to study celadon porcelain. Is that how you reporters talk?"
Zhang Moyan complained: "No. Maybe Zhou Xia told me before that you would definitely come back to study the celadon porcelain again, so I subconsciously accepted this setting a long time ago."
Xiao Xingyu said nothing and smiled lightly.
Zhang Moyan: "Although you said before that Zhou Xia's reason for leaving the porcelain world was wrong, but at least she guessed the ending, right? You will come back."
Xiao Xingyu turned his head towards her: "So what? Who knows how many years that will happen? I don't even know myself."
Zhang Moyan was confused for a moment after hearing what he said: "What do you mean?"
Xiao Xingyu stretched out a finger and played with the strands of Zhang Moyan's hair that had fallen on her pillow. "Actually, what people say is quite true. I've really run out of ideas and can't come up with anything special anymore."
Zhang Moyan looked up with a hint of serious discouragement, and asked in surprise, "Why do you say that about yourself?"
"What I said is the truth," Xiao Xingyu sighed. "In my early years, I was also full of high spirits and ambition. I also knew that I was more talented than others, and I tried hard not to waste this talent. I worked day and night, forgetting food and sleep, and worked hard. My greatest wish was to let my grandfather see the formula for Tianqing glaze porcelain during his lifetime. So I achieved something that many people cannot achieve in their lifetime very early. But it was too difficult. The complication of developing faster than others is that I will reach the bottleneck earlier than others."
Zhang Moyan was a little stunned.
Xiao Xingyu sighed softly, "I've studied at the best universities both domestically and internationally, tried every possible technique, and visited every collection of celadon porcelain... but the more I learn, the more I realize how difficult this is. I've reached a bottleneck, not just in my research, but also psychologically. I've lost the confidence and strength to do this."
He took a deep breath and exhaled. "Too many failures have almost crushed me, so I have to stop. If I force myself to continue in that state, not only will I gain nothing, but I will also destroy myself. It took me fifteen years to finally admit that celadon porcelain is not something that can produce results in a short time. I accept this fact."
Zhang Moyan was silent for a long time after listening to this. Suddenly, she realized something: Xiao Xingyu was actually opening his heart to her!
He clearly said not to reveal your secrets to others.
Could it be that Xiao Xingyu already regarded her as a friend?
If so...friends should encourage friends.
Moreover, she did understand how painful it would be when a person faced something that he or she was powerless to do anything about.
"You're right to do this. A negative mood won't allow you to accomplish anything, and it will only make you miserable. People should have an empty cup mentality. When your heart is filled with negativity, you should first empty it, and then good things can come in. If you can't force something, just let it happen naturally. Living a good life is also very important."
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