Xiao Xingyu gently pushed Zhang Moyan closer to him. He seemed to realize something and looked at her for a moment before speaking in a soft, gentle voice, "Remember. Why don't you like the name 'Doudou'? Isn't that what your parents called you?"
Zhang Moyan lowered her head, her gaze slightly downward, tiny glimmers of light trembling on her moist eyelashes. She pursed her full lips and shook her head slightly: "Because it's not my name."
"Isn't that your name?" Xiao Xingyu asked.
Zhang Moyan nodded, her eyes fixed on Xiao Xingyu's snow-white collar, as if talking to herself: "At first, I didn't know this wasn't my name, until I was in the third grade of elementary school..."
Her throat rolled.
She continued, "One day, Mom suddenly fell ill, and Dad went to the hospital to see a doctor on Mom's behalf. They left in a hurry, and not long after, Dad came back alone, saying Mom needed to be hospitalized and he'd come back to get money. When I grew up, I found out Mom had an ectopic pregnancy. Dad was very nervous at the time, and he took some money from the safe in the closet at home and left. I was home alone, and I saw that Dad had opened the safe but didn't close it again, so I wanted to go and close it."
When Zhang Moyan said this, her body trembled slightly, and she secretly tried to adjust her breathing.
Xiao Xingyu looked suspicious, rubbed her back soothingly, and said softly, "If you don't want to talk, don't force it."
Zhang Moyan shook her head as if she was being stubborn, and continued: "Dad had rummaged through the safe, so I wanted to help clean it up, and then... then I saw an autopsy report of a little girl named Zhang Shihan."
Zhang Moyan's breathing became increasingly short, and a layer of cold sweat broke out on her fair forehead. "She was kidnapped and murdered... She lived until she was less than four years old. Inside the autopsy report was a photo of her when she was younger with her parents, and behind it were a few words written by her father in blue pen: 'Doudou's first birthday.' Besides these, I also saw an adoption certificate..."
"Okay," Xiao Xingyu interrupted her, hugged the trembling woman into his arms, and kissed her temples next to her ears, "Don't say anything, I get it!"
Zhang Moyan buried her face in Xiao Xingyu's solid chest and continued as if to self-harm: "So now you know, I'm not their real daughter, I'm an orphan they adopted. My adoptive parents have suffered great psychological trauma, and they are extremely insecure about the child they raised..."
"So it was that kid Zhang Shihan who was kidnapped, not you, right?" Xiao Xingyu confirmed with her seriously, "When we broke up, you told me you were borrowing this kid's experience, right?"
Zhang Moyan was stunned and hesitated for a few seconds before answering: "Yes, yes."
She was glad that Xiao Xingyu couldn't see her expression at the moment.
Xiao Xingyu breathed a sigh of relief, touched Zhang Moyan's head with heartache, and returned to the topic: "I see, Moyan, how much do you still have that I don't know? Can you be a little more sincere with me? Okay, it's okay, I get it."
Zhang Moyan's tears fell as she was about to fall. No! He didn't know. He would never know everything.
But that was all she could say, so that the reason why she had to marry a young man from the public security, procuratorial and judicial departments was established. As for the rest, he could not know.
She wanted to protect him.
It was really sad. Although she wanted Xiao Xingyu very, very much, she had to be a mature adult and could not act on her emotions or without considering the consequences.
The reason for breaking up was not because I didn’t like you from the beginning, but because I knew it would not work out.
Xiao Xingyu hugged Zhang Moyan for a long time. When he felt the woman's heartbeat in his arms gradually calmed down, he let go of her slightly, lifted her face, and looked into her eyes with his black eyes, which were full of earnestness.
"Mo Yan, thank you for telling me such an important thing. I know why you told me all this, but I still want to tell you that I, Xiao Xingyu, really want to be with you! So, can you fight with your parents for me just once? I can prove to them with my actions that I will protect you for the rest of your life and won't let anything happen to you. It's definitely safer than working in the police, procuratorate, or courts. I believe that as long as I'm sincere enough, my uncle and aunt will accept me one day."
Listening to Xiao Xingyu's words, Zhang Moyan's tears fell like beads from a broken string. It felt like a knife was rolling in her heart, her flesh and blood were blurred, and the pain was deep in her bones.
"Don't be like this," she shook her head weakly. "I don't want to disappoint them. My adoptive parents really treat me like their own child. If I don't repay them for all the years of raising me, wouldn't I be an ungrateful person? We haven't been together long, and our feelings aren't deep yet. I think we should just break up!"
As he said these words, Zhang Moyan's heart was bleeding, as if he was peeling off his skin and pulling out his tendons, forcibly stripping off a part of his body.
But no matter how cruel this excuse is, it is still a hundred times better than the truth.
What a heartbroken woman! Xiao Xingyu, who was so sincere that he almost humbly offered his heart, paused when he heard this answer. He was so surprised and incredulous that he didn't react for a long time.
"Mo Yan..." Xiao Xingyu wanted to say something but stopped himself. His eyes encompassed Zhang Mo Yan, like a silent whip. The unfinished words were filled with disappointment.
The air between the two of them was almost frozen. Zhang Moyan didn't even dare to look up at Xiao Xingyu. Xiao Xingyu's attitude tonight was sincere and his posture was humble, but even so, he was still cruelly rejected. Even she felt it was too cruel.
After saying such harsh words, it seemed inappropriate to continue hugging like this. Zhang Moyan was hesitating whether to push Xiao Xingyu away when she suddenly heard Xiao Xingyu say above her head: "Then can I force you to love me forever?"
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