Chapter 71
◎Recognize relatives. ◎
This was the first time Xie Huaijin spoke to her like this after she fell ill. Ci Ying couldn't sleep for half the night. The next day, she rushed to the Yan family army's camp in a daze. When she got off the carriage, she accidentally fell down.
Ci Ying injured her leg. She didn't want Xie Huaijin to know, so she always went back late at night, hurried to see Xie Huaijin, asked about the situation, and then hurried away.
She went out early in the morning and came back in the middle of the night. Fortunately, during the time when her leg was injured, Ci Ying did not run into the sober Xie Huaijin.
Fatigue still weighed on Ci Ying all the time. Even though she was walking fast enough, it was still not enough.
It was late autumn, and the nights in Mobei always seemed to bring rain. Whenever Ci Ying went outside, she was greeted by a chilling dampness that seeped right into her bones. The day her leg healed, Zhu Yi, as usual, came to report on Xie Huaijin's condition. It was early morning, and the flowers on the windowsill were covered in frost. Zhu Yi whispered, "Master, everything is fine."
Ci Ying seemed to need only this one question. She then asked, "Has he been taking his medicine properly these days?"
Because of the young man's bad deeds in the past, Ci Ying would always ask about him every few days.
Zhu Yi said, "Yes, I eat it every day."
Ci Ying felt relieved again and touched the white frost on the flower petals with her fingers. The wind in the late autumn morning made her shiver all over. She hurriedly closed the window and sat down, only to find that Zhu Yi had left.
Ciying didn't know when the days began to grow longer.
She clearly had free time during the day, but she became more and more accustomed to visiting Xie Huaijin only late at night.
She told herself that Xie Huaijin's waking hours were irregular before, and if Xie Huaijin wanted to see her, he would naturally tell Zhu Yi. She naturally found excuses for herself, and so time and time again, day after day, she walked away with trembling fingers.
At that time, Ci Ying didn't know what the emotion lingering in her heart every day was called. It was only a long time later that she realized that she was just afraid.
Because she was afraid, she ran away, and because she was afraid, she later bluffed.
Ci Ying was forced to rush back again because Xie Huaijin had another high fever. Ci Ying actually couldn't remember how many times it had happened, but she was tired again and again, and her fatigue and silence became more and more serious.
She stood outside the door again and again, staring at the pain of the young man inside the house.
Her heart trembled with it.
Because of Xie Huaijin's illness that day, Ci Ying turned down the meeting with Yuwen Shu. Yan Ji told her seriously that this had made Yuwen Shu suspicious, and if Yuwen Shu knew about Xie Huaijin, the situation would become worse.
Yan Ji asked Ci Ying to make a choice. Perhaps because he had found out something, Yan Ji no longer treated Xie Huai Jin with the same friendliness as before. He said to Ci Ying, "Ci Ying, you are not a doctor."
Ciying thought, yes, she is not a doctor.
She couldn't save Xie Huaijin.
She can't be anyone's savior.
But when Yan Ji asked her how to choose, she still chose the seriously ill Xie Huaijin.
That day, Yan Ji had their first quarrel with her. Late at night, Ci Ying came back from Yan Mansion exhausted. As usual, she went to see Xie Huaijin. She was shivering in the late autumn wind. She closed the door, choked for a long time, and squatted down holding the door frame.
Hearing a sound behind her, Ci Ying wiped away her tears and stood up in a hurry, thinking that Xie Huaijin had woken up.
She felt a little flustered for no reason. She hadn't seen Xie Huaijin soberly for a long time, and she didn't know what to say.
But fortunately, Xie Huaijin was still sleeping soundly.
The room was filled with the scent of heavy incense, mixed with the rich aroma of herbs. Ci Ying covered her nose and coughed continuously.
The tears stopped falling, and she sat silently beside the young man's bed.
Later, Ci Ying promised Yan Ji that she would never let Xie Huaijin delay their work again. Yan Ji finally relented, but with a complicated look in his eyes, he said to Ci Ying, "Don't do it again."
Ci Ying nodded, and her face gradually lost expression.
On the fifth day after that day, Yuwen Fu got the news from somewhere and secretly brought his secret guards to the Yan Mansion. He stopped Ciying in her room and said, "Don't be afraid, I'm here to save you."
Yuwen Fu, presumably having heard the false news that Yan Ji had followed Yuwen Shu's orders to arrest her, went to the door in black clothes and with his face covered to rescue Ciying. Ciying couldn't reveal her relationship with Yan Ji for the time being, but it was impossible for her to leave with Yuwen Fu either. She could only say with a sullen face, "No need."
Yuwen Fu urgently grabbed Ci Ying and told her not to lose her temper at this time, saying that he was saving her and that Yuwen Shu was not a good person. Ci Ying pushed Yuwen Fu's hand away, frowned and said, "It's none of your business."
Yuwen Fu reached out to knock her out and take her away, but was forced back by the secret guards in the dark. Yan Ji also hurried over. Yuwen Fu saw that something was wrong and left first. He made a look to Ci Ying saying "I'll come again next time". Ci Ying clenched her hands.
Yan Ji also saw it and said seriously, "Yuwen Shu has been monitoring Yuwen Fu's movements. Ciying, you should stay in the mansion for the next few days and stop going back and forth to Xie Huaijin's house."
Ci Ying subconsciously refused, but was forced to agree because she had promised Yan Ji before.
She wrote back asking Zhu Yi and Zhu Er to take good care of Xie Huaijin and to send someone to look for her if Xie Huaijin's condition worsened. She handed the letter to the secret guard. Yan Ji, holding a sword, watched her from the side. After a while, he suddenly said, "Ci Ying, have you noticed that you look better these days since you haven't been home?"
Ci Ying looked at Yan Ji and said, "No."
However, the maid burned some fine calming incense in the room, and Ciying no longer had to travel back and forth, so she slept much more soundly than before. Ciying's spirits began to improve, but at the same time, something was slowly deteriorating.
When you are busy, you often have no time. Ci Ying was busy dealing with the affairs of Yuwen Shu, Yuwen Fu and the Yan family army, and she kept postponing her return time.
By the time she realized it, winter had already arrived in Mobei.
At that time, Ci Ying had a strange illusion. She regarded everything that happened in those days as a kind of balance.
She naturally equated two completely unrelated things, thinking that as long as she was busy, nothing would happen to Xie Huaijin, and as long as she kept busy, Xie Huaijin would be able to live well.
Zhu Yi would write a letter every two days to report to her about Xie Huaijin's condition. In the letter, Xie Huaijin was always doing well, taking his medicine well, and his condition had not worsened.
Ciying put all the letters in a box. The number of letters in the box increased little by little, and Mobei also welcomed the first winter that Ciying had ever seen.
At that time, Ci Ying had been staying in Yan Mansion most of the time. She and Yan Ji had come up with a complete plan, and everything was waiting for the recognition banquet that Yuwen Shu had announced after the New Year.
During this period, Ci Ying had met Xie Huaijin before. The young man always asked her how she was doing recently, and Ci Ying always said that she was fine. Then he asked Xie Huaijin how she was, and the young man always said that he was fine too.
So Ci Ying carefully mentioned that she might have to stay in Yan Mansion for the near future. The young man looked at her gently and just said "Okay".
After the words were spoken, the room fell silent for a moment.
After a long time, Ci Ying could only say "OK".
Ci Ying couldn't explain the disappointment in her heart, as the young man was clearly doing it for her own good.
It was a long time later that Ci Ying realized that at that time she hoped to be retained by the young man.
She noticed her inner retreat before anyone else, and because of this, she was wrapped in unspeakable guilt. She didn't know why she became such a person in front of Xie Huaijin.
At the end of that day, she lowered her eyes, and the young man took the opportunity to say that he was "tired".
Ci Ying opened her mouth but could not utter the following words. Before leaving, she warned, "You must take your medicine well."
The young man always said, "I took my medicine well."
Well, he took his medicine well.
Zhu Yi wrote letters to Ci Ying in Xie Huaijin's room every day. Xie Huaijin, who was awake, quietly looked at a bowl of black medicine on the table. He drank it quietly and vomited quietly. The blue veins on his hands were caused by pain and were particularly obvious on his pale hands. After finishing a bowl, the maid outside would bring the freshly boiled medicine.
There were hawthorn fruits and pastries on the side, and Xie Huaijin would occasionally use some, but most of the time, it would take him an hour to drink a bowl of medicine. Over time, Xie Huaijin drank medicine all the time he was awake.
The medicine is bitter and astringent, like the night in the northern desert.
In fact, he had been seriously ill several times, with fevers ranging from high to low, but Zhu Yi always wrote: "Master, you took your medicine well today, everything is fine, Miss Ciying, don't worry."
Ciying wasn't too worried, maybe.
She piled those tasks on herself exponentially, to the point that Yan Ji couldn't stand it anymore and asked Ci Ying if she wanted to live.
Ci Ying said "no". She looked at Yan Ji quietly and said that she was fine.
Yan Ji was speechless for a moment, kicked the door and left, and Ci Ying quietly dealt with military affairs again.
During that time, Ci Ying felt for the first time that life is just waiting for one day after another.
She didn't know that the two months that Yuwen Shu mentioned would be so difficult to endure. She always felt that she had to let go of some things before she could think clearly about other things.
Time really passed like this.
The snow in Mobei fell earlier than in Chang'an and Jiangnan. After Ci Ying stayed at Yan Mansion one day, she woke up in the middle of the night and opened the window to see silver frost all over the ground. The snow was falling in large flakes like goose feathers.
Somehow, she thought of Xie Huaijin.
She opened the door and got in the carriage back.
Snow fell all the way. When Ci Ying got off the carriage and ran all the way to Xie Huaijin's house, she suddenly stopped.
She was full of coldness. If she went in and infected Xie Huaijin...
The consequences were too serious, so Ci Ying slowed down and stopped little by little.
She sat on the steps in front of the house, thinking about official business. Yan Ji said that she would be busier in the next two months because Yuwen Shu would soon announce her identity to the public. At that time, Yuwen Shu's true purpose would be revealed, and Yuwen Fu would also come to her because of the military token. She needed to prepare in advance.
Snow fell on the girl's head. She sat on the steps all night. In the early morning, Zhu Yi found her and was so surprised that he quickly took a cloak from the side and covered Ci Ying with it. Ci Ying was dressed very warmly and was not too cold.
After a sleepless night, Ci Ying's eyes showed signs of fatigue. She whispered, "Don't tell him."
Zhu Yi was silent for a while, then nodded.
Ci Ying left, and she seemed to have no idea why she didn't dare to see Xie Huaijin.
Wait a little longer...
She said this to herself again.
The corners of her mouth became straighter and straighter, and her body became straighter and straighter. While power brought her initial fame, it also put her on another torture rack.
She was forced to act out the father-daughter relationship with Yuwen Shu. On New Year's Eve, Yuwen Shu asked Ciying and Yan Ji to come to his house for the New Year's Eve dinner. The banquet was only a few days away, so of course Ciying had to go.
Before getting on the carriage, Zhu Er suddenly came and said that he wanted to ask Ci Ying to go back.
Yan Ji called Ci Ying's name in a low voice, meaning that there could be no delay on Yuwen Shu's side.
Ci Ying clenched her fists and asked Zhu Er if she could go back later.
Zhu Er seemed to have changed as well, and seeing this he simply said, "Okay, I'll go back and report to you, Master."
As soon as Zhu Er left, Ci Ying regretted her decision and stood up to chase after him, but was pulled back by Yan Ji. Yan Ji couldn't bear to see Ci Ying wavering and hesitated, so he said firmly, "Ci Ying, you promised me."
This sentence trapped Ci Ying. She slowly looked at Yan Ji, then sat back.
Ci Ying no longer remembered what she had eaten on New Year's Eve, that is, the procedures of the New Year's Eve family dinner. She was smiling and flirting with Yu Wenshu, and even drank two glasses of wine.
She doesn't usually drink, but after two glasses she felt dizzy and was thinking about going back.
Yan Ji sent her back, and when he helped her into the door, he happened to meet Xie Huaijin who was waiting in the hall.
The young man sat in a wheelchair, his face still pale and weak, but he seemed to be better than before.
Seeing Ciying being helped in, he glanced at Zhuyi, who stepped forward to support Ciying.
The young man turned his head and coughed softly. Yan Ji glanced at Xie Huaijin and left. Zhu Yi helped Ci Ying to the armchair beside him and then went downstairs.
Ci Ying sat obediently on the armchair and suddenly looked at Xie Huaijin.
She opened her eyes wide and just looked at him.
The drunk Ci Ying didn't talk nonsense, but had a pair of big eyes. Xie Huaijin looked at her quietly and gently from a distance.
Ci Ying felt an indescribable sadness in her heart. She stood up, walked forward and hugged Xie Huaijin.
The young man seemed stunned by her action for a moment, but soon started coughing again. Ci Ying hurriedly loosened her arms and asked softly, "What's wrong?"
Xie Huaijin said softly, "It's okay."
Ci Ying's heart couldn't stop beating. She lowered her head and said softly, "Xie Huaijin, Happy New Year."
She then asked, "Xie Huaijin, do you have any New Year's wishes? I can help you realize them."
Ci Ying raised her head and said, "I'm very powerful now..."
Xie Huaijin looked at Ciying quietly and said, "I know."
"Then what is your wish?" Ci Ying squatted down and looked at Xie Huaijin, reaching out to touch the young man's eyes. The young man did not dodge, but continued to look at her gently.
"I want to pick the fruit that Ciying picked." Xie Huaijin said.
Ci Ying didn't react for a moment, but felt that these words were inexplicably familiar.
She looked out the window and saw a blanket of snow. She hesitated and said, "It's winter now, so there doesn't seem to be any snow. Can I wait until summer and pick some for you?"
The young man said "OK," and then said, "That's it."
"What about you, Ciying?" the young man coughed and asked haltingly, "What are your New Year's wishes?"
Ci Ying looked at Xie Huaijin, her New Year's wish was that he would get better.
But that's not something she or he can decide.
But she still said, "I wish Xie Huaijin gets better soon."
The young man was stunned for a moment, then said more gently, "Okay."
Ci Ying blinked. It had been a long time since they had such a calm chat.
Ci Ying leaned tiredly on the young man's wheelchair. Xie Huaijin glanced at her profile and touched Ci Ying's hair lightly with his fingers, just a little, without even startling Ci Ying.
A faint aroma of wine emanated from her, and Xie Huaijin lowered his head and looked at the girl tenderly.
Or maybe she can no longer be called a girl. She has grown up without knowing when.
The next day, when Ciying woke up, she found that she was not dizzy.
The maid said that the young master had someone cook a hangover soup for her yesterday. Ci Ying then recalled everything that happened yesterday. Outside the window, everything was covered in snow. Ci Ying found a thick piece of clothing to put on, and went out with an umbrella to look for Xie Huaijin.
As expected, the young man did not wake up.
When she was about to leave, Zhu Yi came with medicine for today.
She didn't dare to watch Xie Huaijin take the medicine, so she left in a hurry.
Behind her, the young man opened his eyes and looked at her back. He waited until she turned the corner before coughing a few times and spitting out another mouthful of blood. Zhu Yi hurried forward and knelt down to support Xie Huaijin.
In fact, it was like this every day. It was good, but it hadn't gotten any worse yet. It was also bad, but it was not good either. Day after day, there was no end in sight. Zhu Yi frowned as he watched Xie Huaijin taking the medicine. When he was about to swallow a pill in his hand, Zhu Yi couldn't help but kneel down: "Master..."
The young man paused for a moment, but soon took it quietly.
He said: "She may come back today."
Zhu Yi didn't say anything, just knelt. Xie Huaijin glanced at Zhu Yi, handed the medicine bottle in his hand to Zhu Yi, and said softly: "I have been taking medicine well in the past two days."
After saying that, the young man began to drink the medicine. He continued to vomit while drinking. When he finally finished drinking it, his body was a mess again. Zhu Er couldn't bear it and went out, holding the sword in his hand tighter and tighter.
Sometimes Zhu Er even felt that it would be better for the young master to die.
Forget it.
But then I think, just live, why not live if you can.
Even if you live in great pain, you are still alive.
Xie Huaijin didn't think too much about it. He just gradually became calmer. He drank the medicine well every day as Ci Ying expected, even though he vomited out much more than he drank.
As the snow fell, the family reunion party that Ciying had been planning for a long time finally arrived.
She and Yan Ji exchanged glances across the crowd, and then she walked to the main seat after listening to Yuwen Shu's words and listened to Yuwen Shu introduce her to the people below. The vast number of faces below looked at Ci Ying with all kinds of eyes, and Ci Ying already liked her.
Yuwen Shu's speech was not long. When the invitations to the banquet were sent out, the major families in Mobei knew Ciying's identity. Now they were just letting Ciying come to the stage openly.
She had been looked at like this many times before, and Ci Ying was already so familiar with it that she could clearly recognize the meaning of each look.
After he finished speaking, Yuwen Shu smiled and called over the newly appointed head of a distant Mobei family. There was a hint of matchmaking in his words. The head of the family was young, only twenty-six years old, and had not yet married. He was also handsome, and judging from his appearance and family background, he was a good match for Ciying.
Ci Ying considered Yu Wenshu's intentions and did not immediately reject the young patriarch's overtures. She took the wine from his hand and whispered, "Patriarch Yin."
Yin Ce has a handsome and charming face, with a pair of teasing peach blossom eyes. He speaks humorously and knows when to advance and retreat. Ci Ying had heard about the Yin family from Yan Ji early in the morning. Yin Ce has not been married yet because of filial piety and mourning for his parents. The woman could not wait and broke off the engagement. Ci Ying wondered about Yuwen Shu's purpose.
Because Yuwen Shu was there to help, Ciying played the role of an obedient daughter and couldn't help but flirt with Yin Ce. The people of Mobei were open-minded and couldn't help but start to tease Yin Ce and Ciying as they chatted back and forth. Yin Ce smiled and said, "Miss, you just arrived in Mobei. Don't mind me."
But the words also convey intimacy and affection.
Ci Ying shook her head. She didn’t care about these things, nor did she think that Yin Ce really fell in love with her at first sight.
She wondered if she could get some information from Yin Ce. According to Yan Ji, Yin Ce was not a member of Yuwen Shu's faction, so perhaps he could be won over in the future.
The two talked for a long time. Ci Ying felt that it was enough and prepared to find an excuse to leave.
At this time, Yuwen Shu stopped Ciying and said that he would introduce someone to her later.
Ci Ying only needed a decent identity. As for Yuwen Shu's introduction, Ci Ying felt that she was more like a commodity being evaluated by Yuwen Shu to see who would be the most suitable person to sell it to. She had guessed it early on, but she still didn't expect Yuwen Shu to do it so obviously. She was thinking about how to refuse, but before she could open her mouth, Yin Ce on the side spoke.
Yin Ce seemed to see through it, his peach blossom eyes filled with smiles: "The lobby is too stuffy, Miss, are you willing to go with me to enjoy the snow?"
Yuwen Shu glanced between the two of them, waved his hand and said, "Go."
Ci Ying walked out with Yin Ce, realizing that this was a ladder for her, and turned around and said, "Thank you."
Yin Ce shook his head and suddenly supported Ci Ying. The sudden intimacy made Ci Ying frown, but Yin Ce quickly took a step back: "Sorry, there are steps here. It's too dark. I'm afraid Miss can't see clearly."
The lights in this corner were dim, and Ci Ying almost fell down. She looked at Yin Ce and said, "Thank you."
The people around were making a fuss, and Yin Ce replied with a few words. Ci Ying glanced at them one by one and found that most of them were younger people, probably familiar with Yin Ce. She turned around and prepared to leave, but suddenly, she stopped.
Why did she seem to see...
Xie Huaijin?
Xie Huaijin?!
The teasing sounds around were still going on. Ci Ying turned around and looked at where Xie Huaijin was, and found in disbelief that it was actually Xie Huaijin.
The young man still looked unhappy as he sat in a wheelchair. The people serving him were Zhu Yi and Zhu Er, who had also disguised themselves.
Ci Ying's face suddenly turned ugly.
No matter how lacking common sense she was, she understood that Xie Huaijin couldn't go out because of his illness.
The young man didn't seem to plan to stay long. When Ci Ying looked over again, Zhu Yi had already pushed him away.
Yin Ce called her from the side. Ci Ying turned around and perfunctorily answered Yin Ce, then turned and ran in the direction Xie Huaijin left.
When she reached the back door, she hurriedly stopped someone.
Her anger and worry mixed together: "Xie Huaijin, why don't you stay at home and recuperate?"
The young man seemed a little surprised that she had caught up with him, and explained softly, "I've been feeling better recently."
Ci Ying put her hands on the wheelchair: "Now that you're feeling better, you should continue to recuperate. It's so windy and snowy outside." She was still concerned when she said this, but Ci Ying couldn't control her tone.
When she subconsciously wanted to explain her relationship with Yin Ce, she didn't know how much Xie Huaijin had seen, nor did she understand why she wanted to explain, when there was obviously nothing.
But Xie Huaijin didn't mention Yin Ce at all, and didn't seem to notice the farce that had just occurred in the corner. He only said gently, "I just wanted to come and see you."
Ci Ying looked at Xie Huaijin, and her hands suddenly lost some strength.
The young man just looked at her and said softly, "Okay, I'm going back, Ciying."
The young man started coughing again. Zhu Yi pushed the wheelchair and stayed behind silently. He said to Ci Ying, "The young master just said that the young lady's family reunion banquet is coming and he wants to come and see it."
Ci Ying looked at Xie Huaijin's back.
She didn't say he couldn't watch...
She was just worried about his health, it was not that serious. What was the point of watching an insignificant family reunion banquet?
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