Chapter 52 Quarrel
◎Strange emotions I've never seen before◎
It was almost evening when he came out, and the sun was still not to be underestimated. Zhao Yan squinted his eyes uncomfortably, and then he saw Jiang Siyue lying under the tree.
The thin blanket covered her, but it didn't catch, and most of it hung to one side, dappling the sunlight like broken gold. Her hair moved in the wind, and when the wind stopped and died down, her brows were tightly furrowed, and her hands holding the blanket tightly. Zhao Yan felt something strange in his heart, and squatted down beside her, reaching out to touch her forehead.
Everything works fine.
She was a very light sleeper to begin with, and this movement startled Jiang Siyue awake. When she found out it was him, her fear disappeared.
"What time..." The voice was hoarse and the sound was dull. Jiang Siyue was startled. She took the water handed to her by Zhao Yan and moistened her throat. Although her voice was still hoarse, her throat was no longer uncomfortable. "What time is it?"
"It's not even five o'clock." Zhao Yan held his watch in front of her and asked softly, "Did you have a nightmare?"
Jiang Siyue was half asleep and half awake. After a while, she shook her head and said, "I didn't dream about anything. Maybe..." Maybe she was too stressed out by recent events. Since Zhao Yan was also one of them, Jiang Siyue only said, "Maybe I didn't get enough sleep."
She was very good at disguising herself, and Zhao Yan didn't see anything. He pushed the blanket aside and said, "Then go back to sleep. Let's go downstairs to eat first."
I don’t know if Zhou Hong had figured it out, but after dinner, she didn’t ask Jiang Siyue to stay, but let them take a walk by themselves.
The temperature gradually dropped in the evening, and the cool breeze felt very comfortable on the body. There were green wheat fields on both sides of the road, and when you smelled it carefully, you could faintly smell the herbal fragrance of plants.
This is a good time to go for a drive.
Zhao Yan asked for her opinion, and the two of them walked towards the village primary school where the car was parked.
"What car are you driving this time?" Jiang Siyue asked casually.
"Volkswagen." Zhao Yan didn't miss her relieved look. He raised the corner of his mouth slightly and asked, "Is it cheaper?"
"No." Jiang Siyue explained seriously, "The road conditions here are not good. If you scratch the chassis, it will be very expensive and a big loss." She was also afraid that Zhou Hong would show off in a big way, and she didn't like the spotlight, but of course she wouldn't tell Zhao Yan about this.
Zhou Hong loves face and likes to show off, which happen to be Zhao Yan's weaknesses. He cannot change either of them, so he can only reduce their interactions.
After getting in the car for a while, the car still didn't move. Jiang Siyue turned her head and saw that Zhao Yan looked a little unhappy. She said coldly, "The oil is out."
"Huh?" Jiang Siyue was stunned, but quickly realized what was happening. Zhao Yan would never make such a small mistake, so the only possibility was that the oil was stolen.
Zhao Yan supported the steering wheel with his hands, pursed his lips and said, "I won't go today. I'll see if I can find someone to run errands and bring some over later."
The wind was naturally not going to work, and before they returned home, they passed by the funeral home, and Zhou Hong asked Zhao Yan to go over and play cards. Jiang Siyue wanted to refuse, but then she remembered that Zhao Yan had agreed first.
Holding his hand, Jiang Siyue followed him, not knowing why.
The card game was not easy to set up, so Zhao Yan and Jiang Siyue found a place to sit down together.
"Wait here for a while, I'll go over there."
Following Zhao Yan's gaze, she saw a group of middle-aged men chatting away. After a moment's thought, she held his hand tightly and said, "I'll go with you."
"No, there's secondhand smoke."
Jiang Siyue nodded, let go of his hand, sat down and started playing with her phone. Perhaps her madness that day had paid off, as no one in the room spoke to Jiang Siyue anymore. Everyone was just chatting about trivial matters.
She looked towards Zhao Yan curiously. He was talking, but since they were some distance apart, Jiang Siyue had no idea what he was saying. It looked lively, but she felt something was odd.
After a while, Zhao Yan and someone else got up and left. Jiang Siyue looked at his back in confusion, hesitated for a while, and still didn't follow.
Seeing that her cell phone was about to run out of battery, Jiang Siyue sent a message to Zhao Yan to report and then returned home to charge it.
The moon was bright and the stars were sparse. Jiang Siyue sat in the quiet yard in a daze.
Footsteps were heard, and soon, Zhao Yan sat down next to her.
"Did something happen when you went out just now?" Jiang Siyue was still a little curious.
"I mentioned the lack of oil, and Uncle Ma said he had oil to sell to me." Zhao Yan's tone was calm, but Jiang Siyue was keenly aware of the coincidence.
Jiang Siyue had some impression of Uncle Ma, a famous lazy man in the village. He didn't even have a car. Where did he get the oil?
"How much?" I felt uneasy.
"one thousand."
Jiang Siyue fell silent. She already had a theory in her head. Uncle Ma was probably the one who stole the oil, and Zhao Yan's questioning and mentioning it had him thinking he was extorting money.
Zhao Yan's expression remained calm. After noticing her gaze, he reached out and rubbed her head, saying with emotion, "You really are enlarging it proportionally."
"What?" Jiang Siyue didn't understand.
"I said—"
"Siyue! Come and help me carry it!" Jiang Lingling's voice suddenly came from the other side of the courtyard gate. Tomorrow is the last day of the funeral, and Zhou Hong had mentioned that she would come tonight.
"Jiang Siyue? Hurry up!"
A more urgent voice urged her. Jiang Siyue sighed softly and stood up to leave, but Zhao Yan held her back. "I'll go."
Zhao Yan strode away and returned less than a minute later with only a small basket of strawberries in his hand.
Jiang Lingling and Lin Jun appeared one after another. Jiang Lingling kept complaining about the bad road on the way here. Jiang Siyue occasionally responded, but she didn't care and returned to her room after a while.
"Siyue! You guys are also going back tomorrow, right? Please send Junjun and me back to Wanjiang."
It is true that we will be returning tomorrow, but we will be taking the highway the whole way. If I send her off, I will have to go up and down again. "It's not on the way, you should take a car by yourself."
"Oh, you guys are really busy." Jiang Lingling was visibly unhappy, but Jiang Siyue didn't intend to pay attention. She hurriedly walked past her with Zhao Yan in her hand and said affirmatively, "Yes."
When she was washing up at night, there was no light by the sink. Jiang Siyue had a mouth full of toothpaste foam. Zhou Hong suddenly appeared beside her. Combined with the pale moonlight, she was so scared that she almost couldn't hold the cup.
"I heard that Zhao Yan bought Ma Changda's oil at a high price? Why didn't you say anything? Behind his back, they say Zhao Yan is stupid and has a lot of money..."
"He's stupid and rich?" Jiang Siyue interrupted her. Zhou Hong's questioning tone was so irritating that she didn't even want to brush her teeth. She said, "If Ma Dada hadn't stolen Zhao Yan's oil, would we have bought his? And he has the nerve to talk behind his back. Does he think he's so proud?"
"What?" Zhou Hong was shocked. "Zhao Yan's oil was stolen. How did you know it was Ma Dada?"
Jiang Siyue was in no mood to talk about it. "Zhao Yan exploded." He was demanding repayment, stealing things, gossiping about private matters... And these people were all her relatives. The more she thought about it, the angrier she became. "I told you not to invite Zhao Yan over, but you insisted!"
"What's wrong with yelling?" Zhou Hong was furious at what her daughter said. "I didn't steal the oil, and neither did you."
"..." Jiang Siyue took a deep breath, not knowing how to express her feelings. "But he's our relative. Don't I have a share in the shame? I asked him to come all the way here, and now the oil is stolen. What do you want Zhao Yan to think of me?"
"What can I think?" Zhou Hong was also angry. "How could I give birth to a girl as sensitive as you? Can you please stop imagining things after eating a full meal?"
Jiang Siyue turned her head away and poured water into her mouth to wash away the foam.
"It was the same when we were little. You were always angry and said I was partial to your sister. How was I partial? Did I give you less food and clothes? I really don't understand what went wrong in our family to give birth to someone as sensitive as you." Zhou Hong looked disgusted. Seeing her silence, he sighed with regret and said, "You go back tomorrow and send your sister back to Wanjiang."
"No!" Jiang Siyue raised her head, her face full of stubbornness. "Why should I? The bus isn't running anymore?"
"That's your sister. You should help each other. Why don't you understand my efforts?"
My eyes were hazy as this sentence overlapped with many past memories. An unprecedented urge quickly swept over me, and my blood was boiling, shouting: Say it! Say it!
"Understand?" Jiang Siyue looked at Zhou Hong with numbness in her eyes. "I understand my sister's rebelliousness. You have to put her first in everything. My hobby classes have to give way to her phone. I understand my grandparents who favor boys over girls. Their outdated ideas can't be changed. They just have to wear boys' clothes forever. I can get over it. I used to understand it all, but have you ever understood me and cared about me?"
Zhou Hong felt humiliated by the harsh questioning and said arrogantly, "Why do you keep bringing up the past? How could I not care about you? Did I let you wander?"
"I……"
The toothbrush rolled to the ground. Jiang Siyue glanced at it and slowly bent down to pick it up.
"I remember that I bought something on credit from an acquaintance at a convenience store, and then I told you that I gave it to you. You said I lied and ruined your relationship. My dad came back from another city and scolded me, and you also called me and scolded me severely. But why did I tell that lie?" Tears slid down and seeped into the corners of her mouth, and a bitter and salty taste spread.
"My brother-in-law lost some money while visiting us, and you all thought I stole it. No one listened to my explanation. You just told me not to do such a shameful thing and to return it to him quickly. But in the end, the money just fell to the ground..."
His throat was tight, and he couldn't finish his words. After a long pause, he continued, "If you scold me, then scold me. If you misunderstand me, then misunderstand me. No one will care about my feelings. In your hearts—no, I have never existed in your hearts."
Jiang Siyue sniffed and smiled, "What a pity, no matter when, I don't even have the chance to speak out these grievances."
There was darkness and emptiness in front of him. Zhou Hong had left impatiently long ago. The only one who heard it was the wind.
These hidden pains of growing up are usually hidden in every corner of the body, like rheumatism. Once they break out, they are heart-wrenching.
A light suddenly lit up above her head. Jiang Siyue looked up and met Zhao Yan's gloomy eyes. The emotions in his eyes were so unfamiliar that she had never seen them in Zhao Yan before.
It's pure heartache.
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