"Fuck you, who cares who I am? The problem is that Dog Egg's satellite has been hijacked!"
"Stop standing there like idiots! Get moving! Dog Egg can't be allowed to fall!"
"Everyone, immediately go on standby! I need to report to my superiors!"
After a moment of stunned silence, the supervisor snapped back to reality, waving his arms and shouting like a sheepdog herding a flock of sheep.
The alarm sounded, and everyone panicked.
Who would have thought that their prized satellite would be hijacked by hackers?
The supervisor, holding his phone, hurriedly went to a secluded spot and dialed his superior's number.
"Boss, our Gou Dan satellite has been hijacked!"
"What? Is it April Fool's Day? Are you kidding me?"
"Boss, I'm not kidding. Gou Dan has been kidnapped. We only have two hours left, or he'll be dismantled!"
"Damn it, do you know what you're saying? This is a major event!"
"Fuck your whole family! Can't you understand human language?! Gou Dan has been kidnapped! He's been kidnapped!"
Faced with repeated questioning from his superiors, the supervisor felt like crushing his phone.
They only have two hours left. Isn't dawdling like this a waste of his life?
He gritted his teeth and dialed another number.
"Hello, this is Lakuri, the head of satellite surveillance. I need to speak with the head of the Urine Shield Department urgently."
Lakuri, finding his superiors incompetent, had no choice but to bypass them and call the minister in charge of security.
A short while later, a deep and hoarse voice rang out.
"I am the Minister of the Urine Shield Department, Curry Wet."
"Hello Minister Curry, this is Lacurry. Dog Egg's satellite has been hijacked, and we only have two hours..."
Without wasting any words, LaCurry quickly recounted the events to Curry.
Curry asked, bewildered, "Are you sure? And who is this 'I'?"
"Oh God, why is everyone so fixated on whether this is true or false, and who I am! How the hell do I know who I am?"
Time ticked by, and Lacuri was on the verge of collapse, wishing he could crawl over the phone and slap Curry across the face.
"Lakuri, don't get so agitated. Calm down first, and I'll send someone over to find out what's going on."
Curry, as calm as an old dog, soothed the already frantic LaCurry before hanging up the phone.
He turned to his assistant and said, "Have someone go and check on him. Perhaps Mr. Lacuri has gone mad due to too much pressure."
An hour later, Curry appeared at the satellite monitoring department looking flustered.
At this moment, his face was devoid of any composure, instead showing disbelief and panic.
"Fuck, how did Dog Egg's satellite get hijacked? What are you all doing?"
"Oh, damn it! Lakuri, you're actually drinking?! That's a serious dereliction of duty!"
Faced with his roar, Lakuri, whose face was flushed, twitched his lips and rolled his eyes.
He burped and said, "I reported it truthfully immediately, but you just wouldn't believe me."
After saying that, he casually pointed to Su Wu's message on the big screen, and his eyes twitched involuntarily.
"See that? That's what Lao Tzu left behind! We've confirmed that these two characters are Chinese pinyin."
"And this guy is the one who planted the flag in the little white house; he's here to fulfill his promise now."
LaCurry seemed to have resigned himself to his fate, staring at Curry with dead fish eyes.
Keep in mind that the Xiaobaiwu website is still down, so he doesn't think they can regain control of the Gou Dan satellite in two hours.
The value of a satellite is so high that there's no need to calculate it precisely; it's undoubtedly astronomical.
If this satellite really did set off fireworks in space, then his career would be over, and he might even spend the rest of his life working on a sewing machine.
After hearing his explanation, Curry stood there dumbfounded.
"Is that Dongfang Longqi's name Laozi? Damn it, didn't you guys find a translator who's fluent in Chinese?"
Upon hearing this, one person adjusted their glasses and said, "Laozi has two meanings in Chinese. One is that it refers to a Confucian sage, and the other is 'father,' as in 'I am your father.' Of course, the pronunciations are different, so we cannot confirm..."
"Get lost! I don't care who I am anymore. Who can tell me how long it will take for Dog Egg to regain control?"
Curry roared, interrupting the self-proclaimed clever guy, his eyes flashing with malice.
Lakuri waved his hand at him. "We simply can't take back control in two hours. Oh no, we only have 45 minutes left now."
"Fuck, what does this guy want?"
Curry looked utterly devastated and couldn't help but ask.
Lakuri shrugged and handed him a color-printed image, which was a screenshot of the Little White House website.
"I once said that if foreign hackers caused trouble in China, I would dismantle Dog Egg. And some British idiot actually did it."
Upon hearing this, Curry was dumbfounded and said, "The British did it, what does it have to do with us Americans? Why did they target our satellites? This is unreasonable!"
“Obviously I have no intention of reasoning with you, sir.” Lakuri rolled his eyes.
“I will take legal action and demand an explanation from the Dragon Kingdom.”
“We have 35 minutes left, sir.”
"We condemn this! We must strongly condemn this! The Dragon Kingdom must hand over Laozi!"
“We have 30 minutes left, sir.”
"Okay, I'll contact the White House right away. This is no longer something we can decide."
The clock ticked away, and it had been 1 hour and 40 minutes since Su Wu hijacked the Gou Dan satellite.
He sat sprawled out in his chair, watching the data stream on his computer screen.
He can only hold Dog Egg hostage for a maximum of two hours. If the US isn't fooled, he'll have to do something more.
However, the United States has not yet given the response he wanted.
Su Wu sighed, slowly got up, and pressed a button.
A series of codes flashed rapidly, and the GouDan satellite began to slowly deviate from its intended orbit.
It has been 1 hour and 50 minutes since the GouDan satellite was hijacked.
US Satellite Monitoring Department.
Lakuri stared at the monitor and exclaimed, "Damn it, Dog Egg is going off track! Aren't you higher-ups doing anything about this?"
Curry wiped a cold sweat from his brow. "The White House is preparing a press conference, but we don't know if I'll be satisfied. We can't get in touch with him at all."
"Who cares if he's satisfied or not? Let's make a scene first, maybe he'll contact us on his own," Lakuri shouted.
With 5 minutes remaining, the little white house finally made a move.
"We strongly condemn the hacking incident involving Da Yingzi into China's network and demand that Da Yingzi arrest the criminals and restore order to the world."
"At the same time, given that certain criminals in the United States are endangering international cybersecurity, we will launch a special operation to combat hacking crimes and safeguard global cybersecurity, starting with myself!"
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