The mystery within reach
The next morning, Fang Chi walked into the classroom with two light dark circles under his eyes.
He barely slept a wink last night. Every time he closed his eyes, the damned "I like you" on the screen and Xing Jiayan's all-seeing eyes would alternate in his mind, making him agitated and his blood run cold.
He deliberately kept his head down, avoiding any possible eye contact, and walked straight to his seat. However, the familiar presence of that soapberry scent wafted from the side as soon as he sat down, impossible to ignore.
Xing Jiayan had already arrived and was lazily flipping through his English textbook, the morning light dancing on his slightly curly hair. Hearing the noise, he turned his head, his gaze falling on Fang Chi's slightly pale face, his eyebrows twitching almost imperceptibly.
"Didn't sleep well?" His voice was slightly hoarse from just waking up, and he asked naturally, as if the unspoken probing in the seminar room yesterday and the shocking blunder on the forum last night had never happened.
Fang Chi felt as if an invisible hand had squeezed his heart, then quickly released it. He forced himself to maintain a calm facade, taking his textbook out of his bag with movements even more stiff than usual.
"Hmm," he mumbled in response, his gaze fixed on the open pages of the book, avoiding any eye contact with the person next to him.
He was afraid that if he met those eyes, his panicked, incoherent explanations from the previous night would be instantly seen through. He was even more afraid... afraid that in those eyes he would see even the slightest trace of that all-knowing look that overlapped with "Yan's."
Xing Jiayan looked at his tense profile and slightly reddened ears, a faint smile flashing in her eyes, but she didn't ask any further questions. She turned her head away, as if it were just a casual remark.
The morning reading session began amidst a buzzing sound. Fang Chi tried to concentrate on reciting the classical Chinese text, but the difficult words and phrases seemed to have become meaningless symbols. His senses were uncontrollably focused on the person beside him—the soft rustling of Xing Jiayan turning pages, the almost inaudible gasps he occasionally let out due to the dull pain in his ribs, even the clean scent emanating from him, all felt like countless tiny hooks, tugging at Fang Chi's sensitive nerves.
He felt like he was about to split apart.
On one side is Xing Jiayan, the real person who leaves him bewildered and filled with mixed emotions.
On the other hand, there was "Yan" on the internet, someone he felt a dependence on and whose thinking resonated with him.
Last night, he almost absurdly connected the wrong lines to these two worlds.
During the break, He Chen, as usual, came over and casually patted Xing Jiayan on the shoulder: "Jiayan, are you coming to watch the training this afternoon? Can you give us some pointers?"
Before Xing Jiayan could answer, Fang Chi suddenly slammed his book shut and stood up, as if he had been pricked by a needle.
"I'll go get some water." He said this and left his seat almost as if fleeing, not even noticing that he was still clutching the half-full, light blue thermos in his hand.
It wasn't until he stood in the empty water room, staring blankly at the gushing water dispenser, that he belatedly realized his lapse in composure.
"Calm down, Fang Chi." He whispered to himself, looking at the bubbles rising in the sink. "That was just an accident. Yan is Yan, and Xing Jiayan is Xing Jiayan."
He had to completely separate these two identities. Otherwise, he didn't know if he might say something irreversible to Xing Jiayan in a moment of carelessness, or reveal something inexplicable.
However, fate seemed determined to work against him.
During the afternoon physics class, when the teacher was explaining a difficult problem about electromagnetic wave energy transmission, he mentioned an unconventional solution approach. Fang Chi almost immediately thought of a similar case and the ingenious mathematical processing that "Yan" had mentioned the night before.
As he was immersed in memories and comparisons, he heard Xing Jiayan's calm and composed voice from beside him:
"Teacher, could we consider using Green's function to handle the boundary conditions here, and then combine it with conformal mapping to simplify the calculation?"
Fang Chi suddenly turned his head to look at him.
This is exactly the core method that "Yan" analyzed in detail for him in the forum last night! Even the mathematical tools mentioned are exactly the same!
Xing Jiayan felt his gaze and turned her head to meet his surprised and uncertain look, her eyes asking with just the right amount of question: "What? Is there a problem with this method?"
Fang Chi opened his mouth, but no sound came out. Was there a problem? No, this method was perfect. But… why Xing Jiayan of all people? Why could he always pinpoint those thought processes that only he and "Yan" shared?
Is it a coincidence?
still……
An absurd thought, one he dared not delve into, surfaced again, only to be forcibly suppressed by him.
Impossible. How could Xing Jiayan be Yan? How could Yan, who is calm, tolerant, and always provides crucial inspiration when he is stuck online, be the proud, occasionally sarcastic, and emotionally unstable classmate in real life?
He must be overthinking it. It's just that they're both smart enough that they naturally tend to take similar paths when solving difficult problems.
Yes, that must be it.
Fang Chi forced himself to look away, lowered his head, and answered in an almost muttered voice, "...No. It's okay."
He could feel Xing Jiayan's gaze lingering on him for a few seconds, a gaze that seemed to hold a certain probing quality, making him feel extremely uncomfortable.
After school, Fang Chi didn't wait for Xing Jiayan for the first time; he rushed out of the classroom almost immediately. He needed space, he needed to get away from the source that kept disturbing his mind, and he needed to return to the purely rational online world where there were only "Chaos" and "Yan".
That evening, he hesitated for a long time before logging back into the "Observatory" forum. On the private message screen, the last message was still his hasty "Goodnight" from the previous night.
Yan didn't ask any further questions, nor did she provide any other information.
This gave him a slight sense of relief, but deep down, a strange and inexplicable feeling of loss welled up inside him.
He hesitated for a long time before finally sending the message.
Chaos: I'm sorry about last night...
Yan: (Replying quickly) I already said it was the input method's fault.
Chaos: ...Hmm.
Chaos: In physics class today, we talked about the transmission of electromagnetic energy.
Yan: Oh? What method did your teacher use?
Fang Chi briefly described the methods the teacher had taught in class, as well as the idea proposed by Xing Jiayan that coincided with "Yan".
Yan: (Pauses for a moment) Using Green's function and conformal mapping? That's a good idea. Did anyone in your class... come up with this?
Fang Chi stared at the question, his fingertips slightly cold. He took a deep breath and slowly typed his reply.
Chaos: Yeah. My...troublesome deskmate.
On the other end of the network, Xing Jiayan looked at the words on the screen and could almost picture Fang Chi frowning, looking conflicted yet trying to appear calm. He couldn't help but chuckle softly, which aggravated his rib injury, causing a slight stinging pain, but it did nothing to dampen his current pleasant mood.
He typed his reply slowly and deliberately.
Yan: Well, he's... pretty impressive.
Fang Chi felt a mix of emotions upon reading this assessment. On one hand, he agreed with the evaluation; Xing Jiayan's academic acumen was indeed undeniable. On the other hand, this affirmation from "Yan" intensified the subtle bitterness and confusion in his heart.
He didn't want to continue the topic.
Chaos: Let's not talk about him anymore. There's a part I didn't quite understand in the review article about topological insulators you sent me last time…
He abruptly changed the subject, retreating back into the safe haven of pure academic discussion.
Only in these abstract concepts and formulas can he temporarily forget the troubles of reality and rediscover his calm and rational self.
Unbeknownst to him, on the other end of the network, "Yan," who was discussing profound physics problems with him, was looking at those familiar, Fang Chi-style questions on the screen, a gentle yet confident smile playing on his lips.
His idiot is still desperately trying to put "Xing Jiayan" and "Yan" into two different boxes.
Little did he know that all the thoughts, all the panic, and all the unconscious attempts to hide that he had carefully tried to conceal had already been clearly and unreservedly transmitted to the same person through his dual identity.
The puzzle is right in front of us, and the key to solving it is already in Xing Jiayan's hands.
He was simply waiting for the perfect moment to unveil the mystery that had left Fang Chi bewildered.
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