Chapter 14: Ten Years of Unresolved Hatred.
Yu Wu wished it were all just a dream.
I hope that Ke Yanchen can appear like a savior, just like before, firmly protecting her, dispelling her anxiety and fear, and comforting her.
But she herself knows that this is an incredibly real and cruel reality.
She knew he would no longer offer her protection, care, or tenderness.
Amidst a chorus of boos that seemed to lift the roof off, Ke Yanchen finally responded.
"I don't know her."
He indifferently looked away, strode away, his back view resolute and cold, never once turning back.
With a single, casual remark, Yu Wu was sentenced to death.
No sooner had those words been spoken than a torrential downpour began outside the venue, its sound deafening. A cool breeze swept into the venue, making the air moist and biting.
Yuan Yin, the host in charge, shouted into the microphone: "Friends, Ke Yanchen said he didn't know her! Turns out she's someone who's been practically throwing herself at him!"
The moment the words were spoken, the atmosphere reached its peak, and the entire venue erupted! It once again plunged into a frenzy of celebration!
Suddenly, a tremendous weight pressed down on his shoulders, and every part of his body became a painful point of spatial compression, as if he were firmly nailed to this spot.
......
Yuwu will never forget the scene of the public execution.
Ke Yanchen's cold gaze pierced her throat like a sharp blade.
The students in the audience were all indignant, proclaiming morality and justice, while she was a rat that everyone wanted to kill.
Tears slid down, silently covering her face.
Laughter erupted from the crowd, and one could faintly hear someone cursing that she deserved it.
The malice swept in with a roar, crushing even the last bit of resistance.
The world collapsed, and she was still that child without love; the road ahead seemed even darker than before.
*
She didn't know how she got home; all her senses had disappeared, leaving only a numb, dull feeling.
When she got home, she didn't turn on the lights. Everything was quiet. Yuwu huddled on the sofa, hugging her wet self and curling herself into a small ball.
She didn't even have the strength to cry; all she felt was endless shame and despair.
I don't know how much time passed, but my phone lit up with a new message.
Yu Wu paused in her breathing; her intuition told her that it couldn't be anything good.
She turned on her phone and saw Ke Yanchen's message.
[Mutual deletion.]
Tears streamed down her face uncontrollably, blurring her vision, and she broke down in silent sobs.
She stretched out her trembling hand and forcefully typed "good," only to receive a red exclamation mark in return.
He deleted her.
He felt she was not presentable and that she had embarrassed him.
Her frankness and courage became a joke.
As she became deeply immersed in this precarious illusion, he personally crushed her innocence.
But--
Even in such an embarrassing situation, Yuwu couldn't bear to let go, tears streaming down her face.
She really liked him.
So humble that they can give up their own identity.
If only she were prettier, if only she could live in the time when he still loved her.
Even if—
It's fake love.
......
Ke Yanchen will probably never know how much harm he has caused Yu Wu.
For the first half of her life, she longed to be loved, to be cherished and held in someone's heart. She thought that finally someone loved her, that she wouldn't have to face life's difficulties alone, and that someone would finally stand up for her when she was bullied. In the end, it was all just her own wishful thinking and fantasy. She was a fool; she was the only one who believed in this absurd game.
She's an idiot, really.
She's so naive that she gives herself away with a few cheap promises; she's so naive that even after a high-level player has finished mocking her and made their escape, she's still living in a delusional fantasy.
It turns out that loving someone on tiptoe means you're destined to be unequal.
It turns out that she was still a child no one loved. When she was bullied, she could only grit her teeth, break down and rebuild herself, and move forward with tears streaming down her face.
She lost miserably.
She was really sad and felt really sorry.
*
By Monday, Yu Wu had adjusted her mindset.
When she entered the school gate in the morning, she saw Ke Yanchen and Xia Tingxue from Class 5 walking side by side.
Yu Wu slowed her pace, intentionally avoiding them; she didn't want to be with Ke Yanchen and the others.
But she didn't know where the courage came from, and she called out loudly, "Ke Yanchen."
The sound was loud, immediately attracting attention from those around them.
The tall, slender boy in front of them stopped and glanced at them.
In that instant, a cold wind was blowing, my body was shivering, and my throat felt a little choked up.
For the first time, the two stood on opposite sides in a clearly hostile manner.
Yu Wu took a deep breath, rushed to him in a few steps, looked directly into his cold, narrow eyes, and spoke each word clearly.
"You're a spineless coward."
Then, without caring about anyone's reaction, Yuwu turned and left.
*
Yu Wu's affair became the talk of the school, and she became a celebrity.
Someone filmed the incident and uploaded it to social media with the caption: "Stupid, idiotic girl, does she think she's in an idol drama? Does she think she can get Ke Yanchen's attention like this? She's completely disgraced our school!"
The comments below were increasingly vicious.
"Tsk tsk tsk, once you get stuck with this ugly thing, you can't shake it off."
"It's true what they say, ugly people always do strange things."
"This girl is from Class 6 of the first year of high school, and she's been trying to seduce Ke Yanchen ever since she entered school..."
"This kind of woman is just asking for trouble. I really want to find some bros to teach her a lesson."
When Yu Wu arrived at the classroom, everyone looked at her as if she were a cockroach.
Ke Yanchen's words negated everything between them.
Moreover, Ke Yanchen has always maintained a clean relationship with women and never engages in ambiguous relationships with girls.
It's all in vain whatever she says.
Yu Wu and Ji Lingwei's relationship officially broke down, and she became best friends with Jian Mengyu.
Yuwu began to keep to herself at school, feeling lonely and disheveled, yet also exuding a stubborn and aloof air.
Yu Wu still often ran into Ke Yanchen at school, and Xia Tingxue, who was always standing next to him, were inseparable.
Every time she saw him, her eyes would sting, and she forced herself not to look at him anymore.
Living alone is too hard, and she is struggling to get through it. Only on weekends when she is home alone, she can't help but burst into tears when her emotions get the better of her.
Countless painful and unbearable nights have passed, during which I cried until my tears ran dry.
*
It was already late autumn, and Ke Yanchen organized a gathering over the weekend.
The students who came were all from different classes, and were boys and girls who were particularly good at getting things done at school.
Night fell, and a cool breeze blew. A group of people were having fun at a high-end clubhouse on a mountaintop, playing games and chatting around a campfire.
After everyone had their drinks, they started bragging and chatting, and the topics became increasingly unrestrained.
One of the nosy boys, after drinking too much, asked Ke Yanchen, "Hey, what exactly happened between you and Yu Wu from Class 6? I heard you had some kind of relationship with her before, so your relationship with Xia Tingxue was a seamless transition, wasn't it?"
As soon as he finished speaking, the room fell silent. Everyone's eyes darted around, exchanging silent glances.
The boy snapped halfway to attention, realizing he'd said the wrong thing, and was about to apologize—
Ke Yanchen had a cigarette dangling from his lips, puffing out smoke, his eyes squinting, and his words muffled.
"The mist..."
One girl, wanting to change the subject and avoid an awkward situation, smiled and said, "A new place recently opened at school—"
"Slut." Ke Yanchen chuckled contemptuously, as if she were something filthy that she wanted to avoid at all costs.
There was a moment of silence as the boys looked at each other, then burst into vulgar laughter, revealing their worst traits.
In a single sentence, Ke Yanchen explained his relationship with Yu Wu clearly. Ke Yanchen loathed Yu Wu; it was all because of Yu Wu's shameless pestering.
One of the boys laughed out loud: "Where's the slut? On the bed or under the bed?"
"No way, really? She's practically giving herself away for free? She's that shameless?"
"Holy crap, what does such a sexy girl taste like? Hahahaha!"
...
Xia Tingxue, standing next to Ke Yanchen, glanced at him as he smiled without saying a word, letting the conversation drift and spread. She frowned, subtly moved to the side to create distance between them, lowered her head to drink her beverage, her fingers clenching tighter and tighter as she suppressed her inexplicable impulse.
The vulgar laughter of the boys present made her uncomfortable. That was her reason.
Ke Yanchen noticed Xia Tingxue's resistance and scolded her in a low voice, "Alright, there are other girls here."
The boys then stopped their increasingly vulgar conversation and started drinking.
*
As the saying goes, good news doesn't travel far, but bad news travels fast.
Public opinion can also kill.
For a time, humiliation, like a surging wave, completely engulfed the gloom.
No one would believe that it was Ke Yanchen who started it all.
The promise she once secretly cherished has become unattainable and unrecognizable. It's like having a mouthful of razor blades; she can only chew them up and swallow them, feeling like her guts are being ripped apart, a living hell.
She had no mother to hold her in her arms and comfort her, no father to stand up for her and support her, and no friends to listen to her grievances. She could only endure it all alone and swallow all her grievances.
She did indeed swallow it all by herself.
Because there is no one around to rely on.
......
Yu Wu also called Ye Hongmian.
On Friday, she sat downstairs in her apartment complex, with idle elderly people to her left. A cold wind blew, penetrating to her very bones, and Yu Wu's body shivered slightly.
The call was connected.
".....Mother."
"What's wrong? Tell me quickly! I'm busy!"
"...Are you free to spend some time with me lately? Or can I come visit you during winter break?"
Almost instantly, Ye Hongmian said impatiently, "Yu Zi, can you stop causing me trouble? Do you know how much it costs to come all this way? Besides, I'm so busy I don't have time to spend with you. Can you please understand how hard I work and stop being so unreasonable? I'm so busy every day, I don't have time to deal with your whims!"
"..." Yu Wu swallowed all the grievances she couldn't express. The swallowed tears overwhelmed her forced strength, and sobs welled up in her nose.
"Yu Zi? Are you still there? Be good, don't be silly, okay? I'm very busy here. If there's nothing else, I'll hang up now!"
"......good."
The call ended.
Yu Wu silently shed tears, wiped them away, sniffed, and stood up. Several elderly people to her left were watching her, their gazes cold and inquisitive.
Yu Wu went upstairs.
......
He was fighting alone.
Later, when the arts and sciences classes were separated, Ke Yanchen went to the science class, and Yuan Yin came to Class 6, becoming classmates with Yu Wu.
Ji Lingwei and Jian Mengyu voluntarily became Yuan Yin's little followers.
Yuan Yin is like a brightly colored venomous snake; she is bold in her actions and cunning in her mind. Yu Wu has suffered many losses at her hands.
Later, the school organized a mock exam and reassigned students to classes based on their scores.
When the mock exam results came out, Yu Wu was admitted to the top class as she wished, and was in the same class as Zan Ya.
After that, she rarely encountered those people at school. She used studying to numb herself and stopped touching those wounds.
Winter break is almost here.
To achieve good results in the final exams, Yu Wu studied even harder. One evening during self-study, she was working on a math problem.
When the bell rang, a classmate from Class 1 came to tell Yu Wu that someone was looking for her outside.
Yu Wu went out suspiciously and immediately spotted Ke Yanchen in the crowd. He was frowning and looking down, seemingly lost in thought.
Yu Wu paused, biting her lip slightly.
In truth, Yu Wu harbored a secret hope for Ke Yanchen. She longed for him to tell her that he didn't look down on her, and that the rumors at school were false, not something he had said.
I wish all of this were just a dream.
It would be better if it were just a dream.
She even secretly fantasized that Ke Yanchen could give her a reasonable explanation and then stand up for her and deal with those gossipy people, just like he used to protect her.
She stood at the door, unsure whether she should go see Ke Yanchen.
She eventually went out.
She will never forget that conversation with Ke Yanchen.
Tear away all the outward hypocrisy.
Ke Yanchen's expression was indifferent. Only when he noticed Yu Wu did he finally turn his head, his eyes narrowing into a cold smile, and a hint of sarcasm on his lips: "My deskmate likes you."
Yu Wu pursed her lips tightly and remained silent.
Ke Yanchen leaned against the wall, a nonchalant smile playing on his lips. "My deskmate's a jerk, he likes to mess around with used goods. A broken pot with a broken lid, you two should get together."
"Besides, you're having a tough time at school, so you need someone to look after you, right?"
He was laughing; he was still laughing.
The wind was cool, and her hair fluttered gently.
At this moment, Yu Wu finally saw Ke Yanchen's true colors completely.
She looked at him calmly and gave a sarcastic laugh: "You bunch of filthy people, none of you are any good."
After saying that, he turned around and went back to the classroom.
All illusions shattered.
I'm completely heartbroken.
So he knew she wasn't doing well.
It turns out he really was a rotten person.
It's completely rotten.
She hated him.
*
Later, Yuwu was admitted to university and never believed in love again.
She hated herself. Even though she saw through Ke Yanchen's true colors, she couldn't help but think about him.
But she loves herself more.
She deleted all his contact information a long time ago and never contacted him again.
Yu Wu remembers his Weibo ID, and when she thinks of him late at night, she goes to check his Weibo account.
Over the years, she knew everything about him: his favorite female celebrities, his sports hobbies, and his favorite clothing brands...
She was too young then to understand why this was happening, or why her honest and sincere feelings were being mocked. Later, after reading many of his Weibo posts and reflecting on it countless times, she finally understood.
Ke Yanchen likes obedient, docile girls, but she isn't. So when Ke Yanchen saw Yu Wu's fierce side as she fought back against the boys, he felt disgusted and started giving her the cold shoulder.
Later, in the stadium, under so many eyes, he indeed felt she wasn't presentable enough. So he pretended not to know her.
Later, Ke Yanchen and Xia Tingxue got together. Yu Wu and his past became a disgrace, and Yu Wu's existence hindered his interests. She was an unlucky pawn, a cockroach he couldn't wait to get rid of. He was eager to distance himself and prove he wasn't a seamless transitional scumbag, so he trampled on her self-esteem and slandered her. In this way, he and Xia Tingxue would be legitimate.
It was all a scam; he never got involved, which allowed him to leave cleanly and decisively.
A sophisticated egoist.
......
Time is a good thing; it can heal many wounds.
Yuwu thought that all the bad things were over.
Yet I still couldn't help feeling resentful; for a full ten years, it felt like a fishbone stuck in my throat.
She gradually realized that Ke Yanchen had taken away what was most important to her.
sincere.
In a person's life, there are only a few times when they will give their heart away without reservation.
That kind of youthful, reckless, passionate, innocent, even foolish, and unreserved devotion to giving your heart only happens once.
In her youth, Yu Wu thought she had simply loved the wrong person and would meet someone better in the future. However, since Ke Yanchen, Yu Wu has lost the ability to love. She has developed a numb insensitivity to emotions, an inability to love, which is also known in psychology as emotional detachment.
That's how it happened; he threw away her sincerity like trash.
She was really, really sad and regretful.
Ten years have passed and I still feel uneasy.
-----------------------
Author's Note: While writing this, the lines from Chun Jiao and Zhi Ming's poem kept echoing in my mind: "Is it ironic that I love this boy, that the flowers are blooming?"
The next chapter finally brings us back to reality. I look forward to Yu Zi crushing his pride.
My dear girls, please don't feel inferior. How could you, with your sincerity, be a fool? You were brave enough to love; it was their fault.
I've listened to "Love in the Buff" countless times, and sometimes I wonder if, upon hearing this song, you also regret toying with a girl's true feelings.
I think you definitely won't regret it.
Ko Yen-chen, why are you toying with my sincerity?
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