Extra Jade Bead
My name is Shen Yuzhu. I have an older sister named Zhenzhu and two younger sisters named Baozhu and Jinzhu. My older sister and I have the same mother, but my two younger sisters and I don't.
I've always felt sorry for my younger sister, because with such a festive name, everything she's worn and worn since she was little has to have something pig-related, like a bracelet with a gold pig head hanging on it, or plush shoes with little fat pigs embroidered in gold thread.
My younger sister is very depressed.
I don't think it's entirely Dad's fault. He wasn't good at naming; Mom chose our names. My sister, being the eldest, got a good name, but I was born a little later, so I'm just plump and plump. Of course, I can't blame my stepmother either; she never intended to have so many children. In fact, she gave my four half-brothers even more appalling nicknames: Damao, Xiaomao, Amao, and Maomao. Even the little dog raised by Manager Zhou's son has a better name.
They say a humble name makes for a good life, and that's true. Each of my four younger brothers is incredibly strong, especially Big Mao, who, having just turned ten, could knock his eldest brother to the ground with just fourteen shots. My father was delighted, calling it "a piece of cake." But our aunt, who also happens to be my younger aunt, was very unhappy and dragged the three of us to mourn at my mother's memorial tablet once again.
Why do I say "again"? Because my aunt led us in this activity every few days. If my father could hear, it would be the best. If he couldn't hear, I would cry until he could hear. If I pretended not to hear, I would cry until he couldn't continue.
I'm fed up.
My aunt has always told us since we were young that we should be more careful about dad's new wife, that stepmothers are all black-hearted, that younger sisters will steal dad's favor, and younger brothers will steal the eldest brother's title. She also likes to tell us the thrilling story of Ningyuan Marquis Mansion to inspire us not to take our stepmother and younger brothers and sisters lightly.
Not only that, my aunt often urged us to curry favor with our father, taking the opportunity to ask for everything: farms, shops, jobs, and rewards—the more the better. My brother looked sullen, bewildered. My sister was born a lady from a wealthy family, so she could only wait for others to flatter her. It was better for me to be frank and say directly: I don't know how to do that.
My aunt had to demonstrate it herself.
She didn't have much of a solution, just kept telling my dad how virtuous and selfless my late mother was, reminding him, both overtly and covertly, to keep a diary and not be heartless. I didn't like this, thinking my mother couldn't rest in peace in the afterlife, having died and still being exploited.
My sister was very dissatisfied with my uncooperative attitude. She thought I was a heartless little girl who couldn't distinguish friend from foe. So she tearfully asked, "Have you forgotten our deceased mother?"
This accusation makes me feel guilty and wronged. When my mother passed away, I couldn't even call out to her properly, and I barely remembered anything. I only vaguely remember a gentle and warm feeling towards her. Everyone says my mother is wonderful, the most considerate person in the world, and I absolutely believe it.
Of course, Mom is wonderful, wonderful. But what does Mom's goodness have to do with how good Auntie is, or with my uncle and aunt, or with the other aunts and uncles in the Zou family? Xiaohua and Xiaohuang were born from the same litter. One is very well-behaved, always loving to nestle in my lap and bask in the sun, but the other is very naughty, biting and scratching all over the garden and causing trouble.
Dad has always trusted Mom. It is right to love someone and love everyone in them. Do I have to trust Mom too?
Anyway, I don’t trust the Zou family, including my aunt.
My aunt doesn't like my stubbornness. She keeps talking about "big brother and big sister", and I don't like to listen to her nagging.
She always said that we were her own flesh and blood, that with us, she didn't want anything else. So why did she spend so much money searching for doctors, Taoist priests, and nuns year-round? She took such bitter medicine and used such hot moxa to burn herself, leaving herself black and yellow, looking like Xiao Zhouan's mangy dog, just to have a child?
I asked the nanny why. She smiled lovingly and touched my head: "Our Yujie is really smart, much better than your brother and sister."
That's fine. My aunt actually wants to marry me to my uncle's youngest son?!
Every day she told me how great my uncle's family was and how much my aunt loved me, and she kept asking me 'Are you willing?' every few days, and she also said to my father, 'Yu'er and Shun'er get along best. They play together every day and can't bear to be apart. It's really 'a perfect match'. As soon as I said 'We fight every day, I hate him', my aunt stopped me with a smile, and didn't let me continue, and said, 'They are just kids, the more they quarrel, the closer they become' - it made me so angry!
Nanny said that getting married means living with someone for the rest of your life. Who wants to spend their whole life with that fat guy?!
My little cousin is my third uncle's late-born son. He's overbearing, ugly, uneducated, and a bully. But my aunt treats him like the apple of her eye. She even dares to beat and scold my servants. She's so bold! I want to vomit when I think of his pig-like face!
My sister actually tried to persuade me with her dignified elder sister look on her face, and she told me to remember the kindness of my late mother. I retorted, "Since you care so much about the friendship with my uncle's family, why don't you marry my eldest cousin yourself?"
My sister seemed like an old yellow goose with its neck strangled, and she immediately stopped talking.
Humph, who doesn't know how to be generous to others? I don't believe that if my mother were still alive, she would let me marry that ugly villain! My aunt is also picking on the weak. Knowing that my sister is determined to marry into a wealthy family, she bullies me because I am young and easy to fool.
Among the three of us siblings, my eldest brother trusts my aunt the most.
My uncles even thought about letting my eldest brother marry my cousin from the Zou family as the Crown Prince's wife.
My elder brother was willing to do so, but it made my father so angry that he lost his temper on the spot. He first sent my cousin who lived in the house back home, and ordered that no girls from the Zou family were allowed to come without my approval before my eldest brother got married. He then beat my elder brother dozens of times with a stick, slapped my aunt dozens of times, and made her recite Buddhist scriptures three hundred times.
My aunt burst into tears and pointed at my father and said, "My Lord, you look down on the Zou family girls so much. Isn't my sister's last name Zou?"
My father burst into laughter on the spot. This was the first time he spoke so confidently when my aunt mentioned my mother: "That's what your sister said when she was alive. She said that my brothers from my mother's family were useless, and my sisters-in-law didn't look like they could raise good children. It's fine to provide more support from others, but you absolutely can't force your children to get married like this!"
After this incident, my aunt was depressed for half a year, and the Zou family finally stopped plotting our marriage.
The wet nurse hugged me and secretly shed tears: "Your mother has a miserable life. She was born to work hard and has never enjoyed a few happy days in her life. When she was a girl, the old man was weak and indecisive, and the virtuous old lady passed away early. Her brother and sister-in-law wanted to use her to marry into a higher-class family, but she insisted on marrying into the family. After she followed your father, she took care of everything inside and outside the palace. She was always there for him in the palace! My elder sister also advised your mother to take care of herself. But your mother has been accustomed to doing everything herself for more than ten years and is always trying to be the first. How can she change this character!"
I didn't quite understand what he said, but I felt sad for no reason and started crying too.
Not long after, the princess cousin came and the house became more lively.
My eldest brother, at the instigation of someone, demanded that his wife treat my aunt as a proper mother-in-law. The princess's sister-in-law was so enraged she practically flipped the roof off, and my eldest brother was terrified and scrambled about. But it was all in vain; my aunt refused to let my eldest brother go, constantly interfering in his affairs. Today she sent a maid, tomorrow she invited Cousin Zou to stay for a while, just to catch up with him.
The princess's sister-in-law was furious and went to the palace to file a complaint. Then the queen's aunt was furious and asked the maids in the palace to beat my aunt up. My second prince cousin also came up with a bad idea and arranged a marriage for my cousin Zou whose name I couldn't remember. It was said that the future cousin-in-law was not only ugly, but also had a bad family background.
The princess's sister-in-law smiled at my aunt and said, "If you introduce my husband to an extramarital affair again in the future, I will ask my mother to arrange a lifelong event for the Zou family's daughter (the Zou family has many cousins), and you can do whatever you want."
The princess's sister-in-law was powerful, and her aunt was no pushover either. If overt attempts failed, she would secretly hinder her. Then her eldest brother would take advantage of the situation, either ignoring the princess or arguing with her. In a month, her sister-in-law would spend half the month sulking alone in the princess's mansion, and the other half fighting and quarreling with her brother at home. Occasionally, her second cousin would come to help.
Half of the Shen family was in chaos. My father couldn't stand the stimulation, so he moved into Nanyuan to live with my stepmother, and the two of them could have children as much as they wanted.
Because the eldest brother's marriage was not going well, when the sister was planning to get married, her father insisted on asking her stepmother to discuss it together.
The Queen's aunt still loves my sister very much. The two candidates she has are both top-notch. One is the Prince of Wei, who is gentle, noble, talented and handsome; the other is General Bo, who has just returned from the court after making meritorious service at the border, a young hero with extraordinary bravery.
The stepmother spoke straightforwardly, and began by praising the Bo family: "Living well depends on one's background. The Bo family has a simple population, a rich family background, and a good family tradition, so they must be worry-free. Although the Prince of Wei is good, he is still a prince of the imperial clan. He has four concubines and concubines who can be included in the imperial book, and how can he not have all kinds of flowers and plants? Moreover, he is a member of the royal family. Even if he is wronged, who can do anything?"
This time even my father thought it made sense, but unfortunately my sister and aunt completely disagreed. My aunt even told my sister that it was my stepmother who didn't want my sister to marry into a wealthy family. My sister agreed with that.
Later, my sister really had a lot of "good sisters", all kinds of women.
Later, the young General Bo was married to Aunt Gu's eldest niece.
My stepmother also took me to their wedding. I didn't see the bride, but I heard many female relatives chatting and saying that the second wife of the Yuan family was famous for her fertility, beauty and virtue, and her eldest daughter must be no bad girl either.
Later, General Bo and his wife really lived in harmony and had many children.
After my brothers and sisters got married, my stepmother saw that Damao and I were always playing around in the mud and were extremely naughty. She couldn't stand it anymore, so she sent me to Zheng's Girls' School and asked the teacher to supervise me and help me control my temper.
My aunt was anxious again, but she didn't dare tell my father for fear of being beaten again. She hesitated with me for a long time. I became impatient and asked, "Isn't Mr. Xue a good teacher?" My aunt said, "...He is a very good teacher."
"Will the Zheng family bully me?" How could they do that with my aunt around?
Aunt: "Well, not necessarily."
"Then why don't you want me to go?"
"Madam is deliberately trying to be nice to you! She's trying to win you over!"
I glared and said, "So what?"
My aunt just thinks too much. She is about the same age as my stepmother, but she seems ten years older.
For several years after my brother and his wife got married, their relationship remained cold and childless. Seeing our little one growing up day by day, Dad was deeply worried. That year, the old Prince Wei passed away, and my sister was going to follow the Crown Prince to his fiefdom. Before leaving, Dad specially called the three of us together for dinner.
After a few rounds of drinks, the father who had always been strong and resolute began to cry. The father who had never been polite to my brother suddenly began to cry.
The eldest brother immediately panicked.
Dad said to my eldest brother, "... Consider this as my plea to you. Send Concubine Zou away. You and the princess can't go on like this... The princess is not an ordinary wife. She is full of resentment. She has no legitimate son of her own, and she refuses to acknowledge her illegitimate son. When the time comes, this title..."
My sister and I both understood. My sister started crying and began to persuade him, "Brother, just listen to Dad this time. Auntie...Auntie is not a good person...she has no good intentions."
I didn't shed a single tear, and simply said, "My eldest prince cousin will succeed to the throne sooner or later. If you continue to be so stubborn and neglect the princess, you won't have to wait until there's no legitimate son. After Daddy dies, you won't even have a share of the title. By then, you, the prince consort, will have no choice but to rely on the princess for a living."
Actually, the two prince cousins do respect Daddy, but Daddy doesn't have only one son, my brother. All of my cousins are Daddy's sons. It doesn't make any difference to me who inherits the title, but I just feel really sorry for Daddy.
Daddy was in agony. He truly loved his stepbrother's brothers, growing fonder each day. But in his dreams, our dead mother weighed heavily on his heart. Unable to advance or retreat, he endured the pain until his temples were covered in frost.
He is just an ordinary man, neither so loyal nor so cold-hearted.
Of course, he had deep feelings for my mother, but the passage of time had eroded him, and with his second wife and young son always by his side, he could only do all he could for his elder brother, give all he could, and fulfill the promise he had made many years ago.
Dad cried bitterly, staggering and trying to get up: "...Do I really have to kneel down for you? Please, don't make me too embarrassed to see your mother after I die..."
The eldest brother finally couldn't bear it anymore and agreed while crying.
The next day, my sister left the capital and went on a long journey with her husband to his fiefdom. She never returned to the capital again in her life. Whether things would be good or bad in the future, she could only rely on herself to hold on.
On the same day, a group of women and daughters-in-law tied up my aunt and took her out of the Shen Mansion in the middle of the night, and sent her directly to the family temple and kept her under strict supervision.
When the Queen Auntie found out, she summoned the princess's sister-in-law to the palace and gave her a lecture. The princess returned with tears in her eyes, and her brother left with tears in his eyes. Gradually, their relationship softened. A few months later, the princess's sister-in-law became pregnant.
Dad finally breathed a sigh of relief.
The stepmother remained motionless, as if these tragedies and comedies had nothing to do with her.
In fact, I think my stepmother's life was not easy. She came from such a good family, but she became a concubine at such a young age. Her stepson was unreliable, like my eldest brother, who couldn't even maintain his reputation. A more delicate person would have been worried sick. Yet, she could still command the guards to kill thieves in the dark of night. When she wielded the sword, she looked murderous, majestic, and spirited. She was much better than my trembling aunt and my brothers and sisters.
In fact, the stepmother was not very good at housekeeping and had no enthusiasm for it at all. What she longed for was a quiet and poetic life. However, her children were all lively and energetic, and she had no time to spare in her yard from morning to night every day.
Every time she finished checking my homework, holding a cup of tea, she would sit down in the inner room, wanting to paint a few elegant landscapes or compose a few poems, when -
Da Mao was in the main room stealing Dad's sword and playing with it. Dad didn't dare to take it away by force and could only shout "Guifen, why don't you come quickly!" Xiao Mao was in the side room using ink to make Jinzhu look like a cat. Jinzhu sat on the kang and burst into tears. A Mao and Maomao were wrestling with each other on the side. Baozhu in the side room dropped the copying book, climbed on my head to look at the battle situation next door, and raised her voice "Mom, listen, listen, my brothers have started again." I screamed angrily "You damn girl, come down quickly, don't pull my hair, I'm correcting a typo!"
Veins popped out of her stepmother's forehead, and the pen tube creaked from being squeezed. The final result was often that she would gather her energy and roar like a lion, shaking the roof - "Get out of here!"
The gap between life and ideal is really huge - Mrs. Gu Hou once saw this situation and said so with a smile.
Many people say my stepmother isn't close to me. Honestly, she's not much closer to my two younger sisters either, and she usually avoids being scolded. Everyone has different personalities. There are those like Aunt Gu, with her naturally smiling eyes and playful lips, who would hold Sister Rong in her arms and teach her how to write. And then there are those like my stepmother, who's proud and stubborn, never willing to yield.
At least most of what she did for me taught me a lot.
At school, I made several close and affectionate sisters, learned a lot about how to behave in society, learned to do accounting, and sew simple clothes. When I was in front of the elders outside, I could act dignified and gentle, and smile without showing my teeth.
The only exception was when I had just started school. I encountered a snotty boy in the Zheng family's backyard. He taunted me, "Why would a girl study? Why take the imperial examination? You should go home and do some embroidery." I retorted, "If you're capable, take the exam and let me see." Our disagreement led to a fierce fight. We were both evenly matched, and both returned home bloodied and scolded.
Later, my aunt told me that he was my stepmother's nephew, the grandson of the old Duke of England. A few years later, he passed the imperial examination and came to propose marriage. My father was overjoyed and nodded his approval eagerly, as if he was afraid the other party would change his mind.
After the marriage was arranged, my stepmother came to talk to me for the first and only time in her life. She looked at me with a complicated expression: "You are a good child, with a broad mind and an open mind. You don't take any troubles to heart. This is the greatest blessing."
When Damao knew that I was getting married, he immediately cried as if his father had died.
I heard that my stepmother had a very difficult time giving birth to Da Mao. It should have been very painful, but she couldn't handle the constant stream of hair and beads that followed, so she couldn't take care of him. From childhood to adulthood, Da Mao and I were the closest. We played together, got punished together, and even when he lost his baby teeth, I was the one who accompanied him to throw them away.
Damao cried bitterly for several days. Not only did he glare at his future brother-in-law with vicious eyes, he also treated him like a thief and threatened to teach him a lesson if he treated him badly!
My husband and I have a very good relationship. In front of others, I give him face and never hesitate to praise his virtue, appearance, and achievements. Behind others, he gives me his heart and often lies on the kang for me to ride like a horse.
Many years later, we separated and after consulting with our elders, I went to the ancestral temple to pick up my aunt - her hair was gray, her face was full of wrinkles, and she looked very old.
"From now on, you will live with us. We will stay up all night and celebrate the New Year together. There are many children at home, so you can help take care of them. I will ask them to honor you."
I dare not say that she can live a rich and glorious life, but at least she can live a lively life, with her children and grandchildren caring about her and serving her medicine by her bedside.
My aunt trembled and hoarsely said, "You, you...why..."
At the beginning, she clearly disliked me the most, and I clearly disliked her, but now I have to support her.
"Nothing," I said. "You are my mother's sister, and I raised you for several years."
My aunt burst into tears.
She had lived a ridiculous life for half her life, and in the end, it ended like this.
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