Chapter 253 Create, create, create, create, create, create
Chen Erdan lay there cursing for a long time, but finally bought a roll of toilet paper with his own money and then returned home.
After all, as the second prince, he cannot perform too badly, otherwise how can he seize the throne?
"Father, the grocery store presents you with a pack of high-quality Qingfeng brand toilet paper to congratulate you on your ascension to the throne!" He knelt down as soon as he entered the door and held the toilet paper high above his head.
Chen Tiedan sat in the Golden Throne Hall, his 8-square-meter living room, and proudly raised his hand: "My son, you have worked hard. I grant you the privilege of bathing in the Taiye Lake!"
Chen Erdan was overjoyed. The pain in his wounds and the numbness in his face were gone. He looked at Chen Dadan proudly and said, "Yes, I thank you, father, for the bath!"
My father actually granted me the privilege of bathing in Taiye Lake. This is an unparalleled honor!
You should know that Taiye Lake is located in Tingyuxuan, which is his family's toilet. It is made of three layers of high-quality thatch and was named Tingyuxuan by his father, the emperor himself.
The Taiye Lake is a water tank in a latrine. This water tank is made of high-quality earthenware and has only 10 broken parts, making it the only one of its kind in the country.
Now this unique honor is given to me, haha, the battle for the throne is just around the corner!
Chen Erdan proudly went into the water tank to take a bath, but he got stuck because the tank was too small.
"Help, help..." His expression gradually became terrified: "Someone, help, this prince can't get out!"
I saw him stuck in a broken water tank, naked, with only his head above the water.
"Someone, help!"
"Father, Queen Mother—please save me, your son—"
"Damn it! I don't believe I can't get out! Three, two, one—Ah! Three, two, one—Ah!"
Chen Erdan was so anxious that he was pissing and shitting. He struggled in all kinds of postures in Taiye Lake, but it was no use.
His father, the emperor, and his mother did not hear his call, but his brother, the crown prince Chen Dadan, did.
Chen Dadan was delighted. This was a great opportunity to secure his position as crown prince. He called the foreign crown prince—referring to Xiao Wang, the son of the neighboring Old Wang—and ordered him to take Old Wang with him to drag Chen Erdan away, along with the jar.
When Chen Tiedan and the queen went to bathe at night, they discovered that the Taiye Lake and the second prince had been taken away along with the bathtub.
The enemy country also placed his Taiye Lake and the second prince on the table for public display.
He even shouted at them to surrender, otherwise he would kill the second prince.
"Oh - this is too much!" Seeing the naked and spicy second prince, the whole country of Chen was boiling!
How dare they capture their second prince and humiliate him like this!
What a shame! My uncle can tolerate it, but my aunt can’t! My aunt can tolerate it, but my mother-in-law can’t!
Chen Tiedan immediately selected three pigs and led the army personally.
However, he could not defeat the enemy country.
But it doesn’t matter, he still has a national treasure - a 1982 Lanxiang excavator.
He had sold his two daughters to buy that excavator many years ago, but he never used it again because it accidentally killed his youngest son.
But now, it's time for this national treasure to take the stage!
Chen Tiedan drove a Lanxiang excavator out of the country, blasting away all the way, and flew directly into the enemy country. Unfortunately, he made an operating error and killed his second son.
His eyes suddenly turned red and he turned evil, and continued to drive the excavator.
Founded the State of Wei! Founded the State of Qin! Founded the State of Zhao! Founded the State of Yan! Founded the State of Chu!
He creates, creates, creates, creates, and he creates spicy Kung Pao Chicken—
"Ah! Ah—help—"
The enemy countries were completely defeated, and they all knelt down! They shed tears! They regretted!
Oh my god, what kind of divine soldiers and generals are these? We can’t defeat them at all. They want to surrender. Help—
However, Chen Tiedan, who was so angry that he couldn't stop, drove his excavator and pounded 27 families who had bought women into pieces.
According to the Shit Book, Emperor Changde, with the help of the magic weapon Lanxiang, conquered 27 countries in one day, setting a world record in China.
The powerful weapon of a great country is so terrifying!
However, Chen Tiedan, who reached the pinnacle of power, was not happy.
Now he is truly invincible in the village, having conquered the entire village through his unremitting efforts. But being invincible also feels lonely.
Especially since he had lost his second son, leaving only the crown prince as his only child.
The royal family has few descendants, which is not a good thing.
"Empress, draft an edict!" Chen Tiedan knocked on the broken wooden table and chewed a second-hand betel nut he had picked up at the village entrance: "I will begin the selection of concubines and order all regions to send beautiful women to the capital!"
Wang Cuifang was stunned.
"Ah? Choosing a concubine? Your Majesty, this..."
"Why, you are not happy?" Chen Tiedan raised his eyebrows.
Wang Cuifang: "...But...Zhu Fantong's family is the only one left in the village..."
Except for Zhu Fantong's 70-year-old mother, all other members of the Zhu family are men. How should we choose the actors for this show?
Chen Tiedan was also troubled when he thought about it.
After much thought, he had to give up the idea. After all, he couldn't possibly go to Nazhu Fantong's parents, as those two old guys were a generation older than him.
After seeing this, Shu Yan immediately changed "give up" to "insist" and "can't" to "can".
Chen Tiedan's body suddenly shook.
Suddenly I really want to marry a few older brothers!
"Hurry up and draft an imperial decree to bring Zhu Fantong's parents here to enrich my harem!"
Wang Cuifang:?
Chen Dadan:?
"Father, Father, what are you talking about? They are already over seventy years old..."
Chen Tiedan slapped him. "Just go when I tell you to. Why are you talking so much nonsense?"
Chen Dadan: “….”
It's numb.
…
In the end, Chen Dadan could not disobey the imperial order and went to the Zhu family in despair.
Zhu Fantong was seriously injured that day and is still bedridden.
His father Zhu Yitou and his mother Wu Liang were losing their tempers at home.
They've been trafficking people for 20 to 30 years. Even Wu Liang was bought by Zhu Yitou, but he didn't want to escape after giving birth to his son.
Think about it, they have been doing human trafficking honestly and diligently for so many years, but in the end their house was robbed, their money and daughter-in-law were gone, and they didn’t even dare to call the police - it really makes people angry just thinking about it!
But good times are yet to come.
Chen Dadan came over, knocked on their door, and announced: "Zhu Yitou, Zhu Wushi, listen to my orders!"
"Emperor Changde's harem is empty, so he has bestowed upon us a special grace, allowing Nar and the others to enter the palace. Why don't you all kneel down and thank the emperor for his grace?"
Zhu Yitou and Wu Liang's faces turned green.
What the hell is he doing?
They knew what had happened in the village in the past two days. They even saw Chen Tiedan go crazy for no apparent reason and dig up a whole village to death.
But he actually bullied them? A bunch of psychos, did they really think they were vegetarians? They were the ones who sold the wives of Chen Tiedan's two sons to the Chen family!
However, it turns out that they are vegetarians.
Seeing that they disobeyed orders, Chen Tiedan drove the excavator directly to the door of the Zhu family.
Zhu Yitou and Wu Liang were furious, but they had no way out and did not dare to call the police, so they had to go to Chen's house in despair, oh no, Chen Guo.
Sometimes fate is just like the big intestine wrapped in the small intestine.
So when Zhu Fantong dragged his sick body out of bed, he and his son Zhu Guangzong were the only ones left at home.
"Hello, hello? Guangzong, where are your grandparents?" Zhu Fantong frowned and called Zhu Guangzong.
Zhu Guangzong said with a sad face: "Dad, you don't know yet... Grandpa and grandma were taken away by that old man from the Chen family..."
"Huh? Take them away?" Zhu Fantong was even more confused: "Why would the Chen family take your grandparents away?"
Zhu Guangzong seemed to have touched upon some painful past that he did not want to recall. He stuttered for a long time before finally speaking out in one breath: "He, they... have been conferred the titles of Male Imperial Concubine... and Breast-feeding Imperial Concubine by Chen Tiedan!"
“???” Zhu Fantong couldn’t figure out what this meant for a long time.
"What about South African milk fees?? What are you talking about?"
Zhu Guangzong opened his mouth, but before he could say anything, a long chanting of an imperial edict suddenly came from outside.
"By the providence of Heaven, the Emperor proclaims—"
"The Emperor's selection has concluded, but the Emperor and his concubines all need eunuchs to serve them!"
"Therefore, the Emperor has issued an order: Zhu Fantong and Zhu Guangzong must arrive at the Chen Palace within today to undergo castration!"
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