Chapter 168 Life and Death
That scene lingered in Mo Zhou's eyes and heart for many years afterwards. He would think of it whenever he won a battle or was injured. It seemed that as long as he thought about it, he could feel the torn wounds on his body slowly healing, forming blood scabs, and the pain turning into itchiness.
Under the full moon, yellow sand was blowing all over the sky. As soon as you left the tent, you would be covered in dust and your mouth would be full of yellow sand. Therefore, everyone gathered in the tent, around the campfire, to withstand the huge temperature difference between day and night in the northern border.
The soldiers were young and old, from all corners of the country. When the young men gathered together to chat, they naturally talked about women the most. As for the older men, they talked about their wives and children the most. In the final analysis, life is all about these ties.
In the military camp, there was a man younger than Mo Zhou. His parents died early, and he had only an elder sister who was brought up by his parents as a child bride. Whenever everyone talked about getting married and having children, the teenage man's face, which was tanned by the wind and sun, became even redder. He stammered that after the war, the first thing he would do was to go home and get married.
As they talked, everyone turned the topic to Mo Zhou, who had been silent all the time, just watching the rising and jumping flames, occasionally adding a piece of firewood, but his eyes were wandering, like a saw-mouthed gourd.
"Did Xiao Mo have a girl he liked before he joined the army?" The older soldier looked mischievous, wanting to see this usually steady man, who didn't seem to be his age, show some childishness.
Although the other party was asking about the girl, the first thing that came to Mo Zhou's mind was Zeng Qinghuan's cat-like eyes that were brighter than the moonlight. As if possessed by some mysterious force, he was obsessed with the farewell scene under the moonlight and couldn't help but say, "He has a pair of eyes that are as bright as the moonlight."
This flowery remark caused the whole room to burst into laughter.
Whenever the bad old soldier saw Mo Zhou, he would use this sentence to tease him.
Mo Zhou did not refute, but every time they brought it up, he missed Zeng Qinghuan a little more.
Everything about him has traces of Zeng Qinghuan. The moves he used to kill the enemy were learned by him and Zeng Qinghuan. The strategies for repelling the enemy he presented to Shangguan were also discussed with Zeng Qinghuan. He was even Zeng Qinghuan's only close friend.
But later, Mo Zhou seldom heard the ridicule about that sentence. As the battle became longer and longer, the people who used to sit around the fire and chat together were gone one by one, and naturally fewer and fewer people knew about it.
Mo Zhou also became more silent.
There is a lake not far from the camp, where the soldiers usually wash and brush their teeth. One time when Mo Zhou went there, he saw two soldiers playing with water in a corner hidden by trees. Mo Zhou was now a centurion, and he did not want to disturb their hard-earned relaxing moment. He was about to leave, but he saw that the two soldiers were kissing each other and hugging each other.
Two men...
Mo Zhou quickly changed his place to wash up, and after returning to the tent, that scene could not be forgotten no matter what. That night, he had a dream. In the dream, he saw Zeng Qinghuan's bright eyes. Zeng Qinghuan was wearing a gorgeous costume, draped in moonlight, like a moon fairy descending to the earth, and stretched out her arms to him.
The next morning, Mo Zhou woke up to the dissatisfied looks of his fellow tent-mates and noticed something unusual under him. In a trance, he finally realized what kind of feelings he had for Zeng Qinghuan.
Then, I felt that I had looked down on him.
How could he...
The battle in Mozhou lasted for three years. He was appreciated by the generals at that time for his repeated outstanding achievements and was promoted many times. After the battle, he finally became a fifth-rank military officer.
The general was a man who valued talent, and before returning to the capital, he gave him many instructions, emphasizing that the Queen Mother and the Regent were now in power, and asked him to learn to be patient, fearing that this rare military talent would be harmed in court struggles.
Mo Zhou rode Zhuiyun back to the capital. The first thing he did after receiving the bounty was to go to the Pear Garden where Zeng Qinghuan was, wearing the armor covered with frost and sand.
Three years later, Zeng Qinghuan had become a star and no longer had to train as hard or be punished as he did in the beginning.
The Cat's Eye that he had been thinking about day and night was right in front of him, but Mo Zhou didn't know what to do for a moment. He always felt that whatever he did would be a blasphemy.
Zeng Qinghuan is a man like him and equally outstanding. How dare he humiliate him like that in his dream?
"You've grown taller, thinner, and darker." Zeng Qinghuan traced Mo Zhou's face deeply with his eyes. "Long time no see."
The two drank and told each other about their experiences over the past three years. When they were half drunk, it was unknown who was the first to be moved, and they kissed each other's lips, which were stained red and crystal by the wine.
The next morning, Mo Zhou's face was filled with shame. He was too drunk to remember anything except the passionate kiss. He thought that he had unconsciously done something to humiliate Zeng Qinghuan after getting drunk. He felt extremely guilty and looked like he was ready to apologize at any time.
Zeng Qinghuan couldn't help laughing when she saw him like this: "But, I was the one who started it last night."
The expression on Mo Zhou's face, who was usually taciturn, was like an overturned palette. It was all kinds of expressions, including surprise, helplessness, and confusion.
They are indeed close friends who always think alike, and they always have this tacit understanding, even with ideas that go against human ethics and natural principles.
Mo Zhou wanted to use the bounty to redeem Zeng Qinghuan.
Zeng Qinghuan was unwilling to do so, fearing that he would offend the Queen Mother and the Regent.
Mo Zhou is only a fifth-rank military officer now. He has no power to fight back against the peak of power in the dynasty.
Finally, Zeng Qinghuan proposed to bribe the manager of the Liyuan to give himself the identity of the woman who had hanged herself after entering the Liyuan not long ago, and asked the manager of the Liyuan to report the news of Zeng Qinghuan's death to the government office in charge of household registration.
Later, there was news that General Mo married an actress and was extremely obsessed with her.
At that time, the name that was spread to the outside world was naturally not Zeng Qinghuan, but the name of the dead woman.
However, history never remembers the names of these minor details, just like the beauties behind the kings, princes, generals and ministers, who are widely known but rarely have complete names. A single surname, X from a certain place, is enough to dismiss them all.
The name Zeng Qinghuan was found by later generations in a letter that Mo Zhou wrote to his wife, and therefore was confirmed to be correct.
On the wedding day, Zeng Qinghuan wore the headgear that Mozhou liked when they were talking to each other. He used to think it was humiliating, but when he thought that Mozhou remembered him through it, again and again, he felt warm in his heart.
This headdress is exactly the one that is now preserved in the general's mansion.
On their wedding night, they were completely honest with each other, looked at every wound on each other's body, asked about their origins, and each other's eyes were filled with pity and desire.
Mo's father and mother never imagined that their child's old friend would become their daughter-in-law. While scolding Mo Zhou for treason, they were also afraid that this matter would be discovered. After all... the Zeng family's original crime was disrespecting the Queen Mother.
Zeng Qinghuan understood their anxiety and took the initiative to live in the other courtyard. She also sang opera for people to hear, maintaining the drama of the actor and the general falling in love.
Mo Zhou could see Zeng Qinghuan's concession, so he told him that there would be another battle soon and he hoped that he would go with him.
Zeng Qinghuan is a talented general who should not be trapped in the villa, and he should become famous together with him.
Even if not now, then in the future.
After the Queen Mother and the Regent are purged...
A few months later, Mo Zhou took Zeng Qinghuan away from the capital and followed the army northward. Zeng Qinghuan was finally able to dress up as a man and ride on horseback alongside Mo Zhou through the northern desert scenery, day and night.
The period before going to the battlefield was a period of free time that Zeng Qinghuan had not had for a long time. He accompanied Mozhou as his military advisor, so the two of them were able to spend the entire day together, analyzing tactical possibilities even while riding on horseback.
Sometimes even when they went to bed at night and took off their clothes, Zeng Qinghuan would push away Mo Zhou's lips and say excitedly: "I have thought of a way to break the formation! We can first... then..."
Mo Zhou felt the unrelieved pain in his body, but he still sat up and continued the discussion with him. Under the oil lamp, Zeng Qinghuan's profile was extremely beautiful, and her cat's eyes were bright.
Mo Zhou likes such bright Zeng Qinghuan very much.
He was supposed to be like this.
Zeng Qinghuan was not used to the climate and soil of the battlefield at first, and his martial arts were a little rusty, but he learned everything quickly. Tempered by battles of all sizes, he quickly absorbed the knowledge he had learned in the past and became someone who could rival Mo Zhou.
The old general who supported the young emperor was eventually defeated by the regent and the queen mother's followers. Before his death, the old general shared all his close subordinates with Mo Zhou, asking him to clear the court and protect the young emperor.
Mo Zhou finally became the General Mo with countless military exploits in history, and finally had the strength to compete with those cronies.
However, in his contacts with the little emperor, he discovered that the little emperor was just hiding his incompetence and was not really ignorant.
Mo Zhou asked the young emperor for a reward, hoping that after regaining power, he would clear the Zeng family's grievances, prove Zeng Qinghuan's case, and return the merits that he had lacked countless times over the years.
The little emperor agreed.
On the day they received the secret decree, both of them felt relieved and thought that a bright future was within their grasp. They hugged each other tightly, and even began to think about where they would go after peace in the world and stability of the imperial power, and where they would enjoy the pastoral scenery with their beloved ones by their sides after they retired from the army.
Until another battle that was important enough to determine the future situation, Mo Zhou was hit by a feather arrow shot from the dark. This kind of injury was just common for Mo Zhou, but the feather arrow was poisoned. That night, Mo Zhou's face gradually became weak, and his heartbeat and pulse gradually subsided under Zeng Qinghuan's palm.
Mo Zhou looked at Zeng Qinghuan, who seldom shed tears, crying silently in front of him - he didn't dare to cry loudly, for fear that the soldiers would notice something was wrong and it would disrupt morale.
"You, disguise yourself and live on my behalf, using Mo Zhou's identity. You can't affect the morale of the entire army now... Wait until everything is over, and then use the secret decree to restore your identity..." Mo Zhou said intermittently, "We agreed at the beginning that we would become generals together and protect peace in the world."
They have always had a tacit understanding, and Zeng Qinghuan can naturally think of what Mo Zhou wants to say.
"I know everything. I will take good care of my parents, but Zhuiyun... Zhuiyun only eats the food and grass you feed it with your own hands..." Zeng Qinghuan seemed to have grasped something, and accused Mo Zhou of irresponsible behavior, his voice trembling, "If you leave, what will happen to Zhuiyun..."
But no matter how much Zeng Qinghuan begged, Mo Zhou eventually lost his warmth in his arms and became stiff. It was not until Mo Zhou stopped breathing that Zeng Qinghuan asked what he really wanted to say: "What about Zhuiyun?"
"What should I do?"
But Mo Zhou couldn't answer him anymore, he felt cold.
One night later, Mo Zhou walked out of the tent, and the military advisor who had been following him was dead. The external statement was that the military advisor died in place of the general, sucking out the poisonous blood for the general, but he himself was poisoned to death.
Zeng Qinghuan and Mo Zhou were so close that no one could tell they had swapped identities. Only the majestic horse Zhuiyun refused to eat the grass Zeng Qinghuan fed it. It stubbornly raised its neck and looked at the endless yellow sand, waiting for someone who would never come back.
It is a smart horse.
Finally, the soldier who was feeding the horses told Zeng Qinghuan that Zhuiyun would die if he continued like this.
Zeng Qinghuan stroked Zhuiyun's mane, which was no longer smooth and shiny but dull in color, and said softly, "He is dead, but you should live on for him. You are his horse, and you can't be a coward."
It is said that horses understand human nature. I don’t know if Zhuiyun understood what Zeng Qinghuan said. After that time, Zhuiyun began to eat the food and grass fed by Zeng Qinghuan, and occasionally rubbed Zeng Qinghuan’s arm with his tail, as if he regarded him as his new master.
It was another bloody battle, with no light day or night, corpses everywhere and blood flowing everywhere.
Finally, Zeng Qinghuan, wearing an airtight mask, cut off the enemy general's head and finally ended this protracted battle.
But this was only a victory on the battlefield. When he returned to the capital, what awaited him was a bloodless but even more brutal and cruel fight in the court.
Zeng Qinghuan rode Zhuiyun back to the capital to fulfill his mission. The scenery along the way, which he never got tired of looking at at the beginning, was now just too boring and not pleasing to the eye.
Back at the General's Mansion, Zeng Qinghuan, standing in front of Mo's mother, was subjected to the most severe scrutiny. She asked in disbelief, "Why is it you?"
Over the years, Mo's mother always felt that it was Zeng Qinghuan who led Mo Zhou astray, preventing him from getting married and having children and living a normal life. She was always cold to him and no longer as close as they had been in their childhood. But when everything was made clear, Mo's mother hugged the tall Zeng Qinghuan tightly with her thin body, and her tears kept falling on the armor of Mo Zhou that Zeng Qinghuan was wearing.
"It's just that I have wronged you, my child..." Mo's mother burst into tears.
"As long as the world is peaceful and the people live and work in peace and contentment, there will be no suffering," said Zeng Qinghuan.
That was his and Mo Zhou's common wish, and the ultimate goal of their unremitting struggle in this life.
Occasionally, Zeng Qinghuan would think that if there really was an afterlife, then in the next life, when Mo Zhou was reincarnated, he would be born into the peaceful and prosperous world created by themselves, and live a stable life, being a carefree little scoundrel who played with cats and dogs in this capital city.
It would be best... it would be best if God could open his eyes and see that they had such a miserable life and could not be together, and let them be childhood sweethearts and lovers in the next life.
In the next life, they want a very long life.
From childhood to old age, we slept together and studied together in death.
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