Chapter 34: "Is this how you pursue someone?"
After receiving Gu Lai's affirmation, Jiang Yi didn't show any particular emotion. He simply looked down at Gu Lai's profile and gently stroked the back of her head after a long while.
Just as she told Gu Lai, her courage came from Gu Lai. Her love did not make her invincible; instead, it made her more hesitant and weighing her options.
Jiang Yi didn't know if it was because of the cracks she had experienced that made her hesitant, or because she was now too old to be as reckless in love as a teenager.
Jiang Yi feels that he is quite decisive in his career, which is probably just a matter of age.
I don't know if Alai loves her in her twenties or thirties.
Jiang Yi thought to himself, gazing at Gu Lai's delicate profile, "I'm still too soft-hearted. If it were her... well, I probably wouldn't fall in love with my own copy."
Unlike Jiang Yi, who could still have enough energy to hold all-day meetings after crossing the hemisphere, Gu Lai was already exhausted from traveling, and the constant messages and exchanges completely drained her energy.
In the end, she was simply led downstairs to the car by Jiang Yi, who coaxed and helped her along.
When Zhou Shanshan saw them, she had a look on her face as if she had seen a ghost in broad daylight.
Two cars were waiting. Jiang Yi naturally led Gu Lai to the SUV he had come in, leaving the other car for Zhou Shanshan and her secretary/driver.
Zhou Shanshan hesitated and made a shifting motion, but her feet didn't actually move. Her hesitant and inquiring gaze turned to Gu Lai.
Gu Lai hadn't put her mind to anything Jiang Yi had arranged, and was too tired to notice anything amiss. Jiang Yi casually opened the car door and helped Gu Lai in, then smiled at Zhou Shanshan while holding the door open: "Do you have a question?"
Zhou Shanshan exclaimed "Ah!" for a moment, hesitated for a long time, then steeled herself and called out loudly, "Sister Gu—"
A puzzled "hmm" came from inside the car, then Gu Lai leaned out of the car door, looking at Zhou Shanshan with a strange expression: "What's wrong?"
Zhou Shanshan pointed to the car they had come in, saying, "Then I'll go and take another car?"
Gu Lai was puzzled, but still patiently nodded: "Okay."
Zhou Shanshan: "…………"
Zhou Shanshan walked away with many doubts, looking back every few steps. Gu Lai closed the car door and fastened her seatbelt. A few seconds later, a "bang" came from the left. Jiang Yi got into the driver's seat, started the engine and pulled the brakes. The off-road vehicle, like a steel beast, let out a deep roar.
Gu Lai narrowed her eyes slightly as she surveyed the interior of the car: "Why didn't you let the driver drive?"
Jiang Yi turned the steering wheel, his reasoning quite practical: "Let her pick up the others; the others are all tired drivers who've been driving all night."
Gu Lai glanced at her with a hint of suspicion, then recalled the strange situation from earlier: "What happened to Zhou Shanshan just now?"
"She probably suspects I've bewitched you, or that you should absolutely not ride with me," Jiang Yi countered. "How did you give her this impression? Did you say something like 'we'll never see each other again,' huh?"
"No need to say anything." Gu Lai looked at the congested traffic ahead, her tone indifferent. "Because I'm not feeling well, Zhou Shanshan probably thinks I should stay away from you for my own safety."
Jiang Yi laughed, the red light of the brake lights ahead dancing deep in her eyes: "That sounds quite reasonable."
This sentence truly left Gu Lai speechless; she could even complete the conversation herself:
—Then why not stay away?
—You picked it.
Gu Lai wasn't exactly furious, but she definitely glared at her left side: "Are you always so sharp-tongued? Is this how you pursue people?"
When the red light came on, Jiang Yi shifted gears and stopped the car. Her sleeves were rolled up to her elbows and rested on the car window. She propped her chin up and turned her head to look at Gu Lai.
Her eyes held a soft smile: "I don't know how, it's my first time pursuing someone, can you teach me?"
Gu Lai paused for a moment: "Do you think I have experience?"
Jiang Yi burst into laughter.
Gu Lai blushed at her laughter, her face and ears feeling hot. She lowered the car window halfway, and the wind slipped in from above, making her long hair fly wildly, which she then held down with her hand.
She pursed her lips: "Look at the traffic lights!"
Jiang Yi obediently shifted his gaze to the traffic light: "Okay, can I talk now?"
Gu Lai said sternly, "Focus on driving."
Jiang Yi's voice lowered slightly, as if he were a little aggrieved: "Not even one word?"
...That sounds a bit excessive.
Gu Lai hesitated before saying, "Okay."
Jiang Yi exclaimed in an aria-like tone, "Alai, you are so cute."
Gu Lai's pursed lips curled up slightly, and then she looked at Jiang Yi.
The car was completely silent.
"..." Gu Lai said, "And then?"
"That's all, just one sentence," Jiang Yi said sincerely. "Do you want to hear more?"
Gu Lai leaned back in her seat with her arms crossed, let out a long, clear sigh, and after a long while said, "You really are... you've woken me up from my nap."
Her tone sounded like a complaint, but when Jiang Yi glanced at her in the gap between looking at the right rearview mirror, he noticed a clear smile in Gu Lai's eyes.
The green light suddenly turned on, and Jiang Yi stepped on the gas.
Are you that happy?
However, Jiang Yi's pleasure lasted only a few seconds before a greater doubt arose in his mind.
—Is A-Lai's pleasure simply because I am the one who said those words, or because of those words themselves?
Jiang Yi really wanted to know it was the former, but at the same time she also remembered the self-doubt and self-blame that Gu Lai had blurted out when he left the ward.
A person who is often affirmed and proud enough would not have such a strong sense of self-blame when faced with this situation. Gu Lai's feelings for her parents were not much better than her feelings for her haters.
Jiang Yi could understand that the marital breakdown had made Gu Lai depressed and even dejected, but she didn't know why Gu Lai would so easily blame herself.
This cannot be simply attributed to kindness or gentleness.
Jiang Yi had seen someone even worse, his aunt, who had been suppressed and even ignored by Jiang Jueming for a long time.
But she clearly remembered that Gu Lai wasn't like this before.
Jiang Yi first ruled out factors related to career and childhood.
Could it be due to my anxious and frustrated state of mind over the years?
Or perhaps... I unintentionally expressed a repeated denial?
...
Jiang Yi said casually, "Do you want to sleep?"
"No, I'm just a little tired." Gu Lai suddenly remembered, "Where are we going now?"
Jiang Yi said, "I was just about to ask you that. There's a fork in the road when we get on the overpass. If you want to rest, head towards Binjiang District. If you want to go to where Aunt Luo and the others are staying, head towards Heping District."
Gu Lai: "Binjiang District? You went all the way to stay at the Garden Hotel? That's a bit far."
“No, we have an apartment here,” Jiang Yi said casually. “It’s a large, single-level apartment. I stayed there last night. It’s not bad except for being a little small.”
Gu Laizhen felt that she still hadn't gotten used to a life of luxury all these years.
"Why buy a house here? Dingcheng doesn't have much investment value, does it?" Gu Lai said, then realized halfway through, "Oh! It's because... but I'm not coming back."
Jiang Yi said, "It was just for convenience. I bought it seven or eight years ago, it wasn't expensive. And now it's coming in handy, isn't it?"
Gu Lai shook her head with a troubled expression, and after a moment of silence, said, "I remember Gu Chengdong... is still staying at their house, right?"
Jiang Yi hummed in agreement.
“Then let’s go to Heping,” Gu Lai said. “Go see him, and then meet with the victim’s family tomorrow. The rest can be left to the lawyers.”
A moment later, Jiang Yi said, "We can actually have them do the meeting with the family members on our behalf."
"No, although I do have feelings for Gu Chengdong..." Gu Lai didn't finish her sentence, she sighed, "but since I know, I might as well meet him."
Jiang Yi wanted to say that they didn't actually know about your relationship with Gu Chengdong yet. Luo Ou hadn't been able to reveal it due to strict surveillance. Besides, if they actually met those family members, they probably wouldn't feel any better, and might even feel more resentful.
but……
Jiang Yi didn't offer her seemingly correct and rational advice; she simply said, "Okay."
Gu Chengdong and Luo Ou did benefit from Gu Lai's presence, at least they moved into a high-end residence.
As the car drove into the residential area, Gu Lai remained silent, her expression unchanged, and this remained the case until she entered her residence.
After the door opened, Gu Lai strode in first.
Luo Ou refused cremation and chose to have her body laid to rest at home. Actually, according to modern people's habits, entering such a house would be a bit uncomfortable.
Jiang Yi didn't feel uncomfortable at all, having placed many money trees as decorations on the top floor of the Fenglu Building, purely because of Gu Lai.
The room was well-lit, and as soon as she entered, Jiang Yi turned on all the light switches she saw, so even though the huge coffin was parked in the living room, it didn't feel eerie.
The staff arranged here have worked very hard.
Just as Jiang Yi had this thought, he saw Gu Lai walk up to the coffin and bend down to hold onto the handle.
Jiang Yi was startled and blurted out, "A-Lai!"
Gu Lai straightened up and turned around, a faint smile still lingering in her eyes: "What, do you think I'd open the coffin to take a look?"
"I..." Jiang Yi rarely choked up, and after a long while, he said, "I was even wondering if the mortician had prepared the body." After all, people who die in car accidents are usually covered in blood and gore.
Gu Lai said, "I just suddenly thought of this. Gu Chengdong is not worthy of making me feel disgusted and want to watch it."
At this moment, only the two of them were in the room. The security guard was outside the door, while Zhou Shanshan and the others were in the car downstairs.
Gu Lai neither paid her respects nor showed any curiosity about this "home." She simply gazed calmly at the coffin for a long time, and the smile that had appeared when she spoke earlier gradually faded away.
She said slowly, "...He just died like that."
Jiang Yi stood behind her, watching her silently.
“He actually died like that. In my memory, he was still that furious, arrogant man, taller and stronger than me.” Gu Lai said softly, “I told you about them, about the things that happened before.”
Jiang Yi said, "I remember."
Gu Lai turned to look at her: "Have I ever told you that sometimes I'm quite grateful to him and Luo Ou?" She paused slightly, "If it weren't for them, I might not have met you."
Jiang Yi said in a low voice, "Then I should be thanking them for bringing you into this world, and for letting me meet them."
Gu Lai smiled but didn't reply.
She said, "But I've also thought about what it would be like if I had different parents. Maybe I would still want to study acting, and my academic performance isn't very good, but they might have helped me get into film school instead of having to play cat and mouse with them when it came time to choose my major. Maybe in that case, my starting point in the entertainment industry would be higher, and then... and then our meeting would have taken a different, more romantic or ordinary turn, instead of being as messy and absurd as it is in reality."
For a moment, Jiang Yi's expression was very complex, showing a mix of bewilderment, reminiscence, regret, and sadness... but in the end, it all turned into a deep gaze.
She said, "I never knew you held such a grudge."
"It's not a grudge."
Gu Lai sighed softly: "I guess it's a regret. There are many things I regret, such as... although you didn't say it, Luo Ou probably didn't have any good words for me. I also wish I had parents who could give their blessings at the wedding banquet. I also regret that ten years ago I didn't have anything to show for myself, except for my naturally beautiful appearance."
“But I think everything we have and experience is an inseparable part of a person,” Jiang Yi said. “I love you as a whole person, which includes everything you’ve said. As for regrets, even if there are any, they should be between the two of us. Actually… I’m already lucky to have met you. Without you, I’d probably be living the high life of Tian Miao and He Xiaoqing, and that wouldn’t be something I envy.”
"Even if there are 'what ifs,' there would probably be parallel universe versions of me falling in love with someone... so I can only believe that everything is the best arrangement."
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My sleep schedule is getting weirder and weirder, and I'm making more and more typos... I'll fix them tomorrow morning. Goodnight!
Thank you for the nutrient solution, Sweetheart: I've already told you, nutrient solution +5; M, nutrient solution +1.
Thanks to Sweetheart for throwing the landmine: Nanxun, 1 landmine
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