Chapter 39: For example, I have always loved you.
Jiang Yi thought she would hear something from Gu Lai to deny or comfort her, and she even thought about how to say "Really? I don't believe it" in a tactful way.
But Gu Lai smiled at her and said, "You guessed it. I'm sorry."
Jiang Yi looked at her silently, and began to wonder if he had guessed wrong.
Gu Lai was leading her to the building where she lived, and they were so close that they could see the cracked bark of the old apricot tree in front of the building. Gu Lai pointed upstairs and said, "I live on that floor, it's quite big."
Jiang Yi, slightly distracted, clicked his tongue and said, "He Xiaoqing wouldn't make the production crew pay for this, would she?"
"It's true that the production crew didn't pay for it, but do you still think she's that stingy?"
Gu Lai was pulling Jiang Yi up the stairs. The narrow staircase didn't allow the two of them to walk side by side, so Gu Lai walked in front and reached back to pull Jiang Yi along.
Jiang Yi walked carefully in the middle, making sure not to brush against the walls that looked dirty, clearly someone with obsessive-compulsive disorder who was used to being picky about cleanliness.
Hearing the voice floating down from above, Jiang Yi replied, "You didn't see how He Xiaoqing is talking to me in such a sarcastic way, as if I've robbed the He family of all their money."
Gu Lai let Jiang Yi enter the room first, then stepped aside and closed the door behind her. The room was clean and tidy, with not much stuff in it. She turned around and saw Jiang Yi examining her table, which was covered with several sheets of paper, filled with various storyboard sketches.
Gu Lai sat back on the edge of the bed and tugged at Jiang Yi's clothes: "Jiang Yi, what are you thinking about?"
Jiang Yi turned around: "I wasn't thinking about anything."
“I mean, what were you thinking when you were silent just now?” Gu Lai reminded her, “Right after I said ‘you guessed it.’”
"I assumed you were skipping this part."
"It doesn't sound like something that can be explained in just a few words. I just want to go inside and have a proper chat."
Jiang Yi leaned back against the edge of the table: "I've thought about a lot of things."
Gu Lai made a listening gesture.
"I'm thinking about how to convince you, why things are like this, what's the difference between behind the scenes and in front of the camera, whether what you're saying is true, and how you'll react if I tell you."
Jiang Yi kept looking at her, and couldn't help but reach out and pinch her almost translucent white earlobe: "I'm thinking about the essence of this problem. I want you to tell me how much you believe in my love for you, but why are you more influenced by other people's bullshit stereotypes than by what I tell you?"
Gu Lai didn't speak, but looked up at her.
Jiang Yi's words became increasingly impolite, yet a hint of gentle amusement remained in his eyes: "Answer me, hmm? A-Lai."
“Go look online, there are still records from the year before last. How did you feel when the director of Yason was boycotted in Europe for inappropriate remarks, which in turn led to boycotts of Fenglu and the movie I was showing? You even flew from California to Paris to see me back then.”
Gu Lai gazed at her: "I feel the same way as you, even more upset than you. You worry about me because I'm a burden, but that's only occasionally. As for me? I'm worried all the time."
Jiang Yi looked down at her and calmly asked, "Did you think this way before, and do you still think this way now? After all the arguments and conversations we've had?"
Gu Lai couldn't say "no," but under Jiang Yi's gaze, she couldn't say "yes" either. She closed her eyes tightly and blurted out, "If in a few days someone exposes that my dad is a gambling addict who killed someone in a hit-and-run, and my mom jumps around saying how materialistic and shameless her daughter is, and you become a laughing stock because of me, then I would rather—!"
She suddenly stopped talking.
Jiang Yi's smile vanished abruptly, his expression neither pleased nor angry, but Gu Lai could clearly see a terrifying storm brewing within him.
Jiang Yitong's eyes were extremely dark, and when her emotions were hard to discern, they appeared extremely profound. Moreover, her already sharp and fierce appearance, once she lost her usual smile, whether genuine or fake, gave those who were being stared at the illusion of being hurt by a blade.
Jiang Yi asked gently, "What would you rather do?"
Gu Lai remained silent for a moment before looking away.
"Would you rather go to the Civil Affairs Bureau with me sooner?" Jiang Yi asked slowly, "or would you rather not have broken things off cleanly before I change my mind?"
This question was too hurtful; Gu Lai couldn't listen to it anymore.
She whispered, as if pleading, "Jiang Yi..."
Jiang Yi placed his index finger in front of Gu Lai's lips, and only slowly withdrew it after a long while.
Throughout this process, Jiang Yi kept making eye contact with Gu Lai.
“I actually guessed it.” Jiang Yi chuckled. “I figured out why you had that ‘not a perfect match’ mentality before, and why you sometimes had that desperate, clingy feeling. You thought breaking up was inevitable, and that my so-called love was just a fairy godmother’s pumpkin carriage, which would be taken away sooner or later.”
"When I came here, I was still thinking about what to do: should I break it down for you and explain my thought process in detail? Or should I change the shares to your name regardless of whether the stock price changes?"
Gu Lai frowned and said, "Jiang Yi, what nonsense are you talking about?"
Jiang Yi said, "You can't stand this, and I can't stand you sacrificing anything for me when I clearly don't need it or want to. I can't stand you silently backing down until one day you're exhausted and suddenly realize that the saying 'the best match is not a good match' really applies."
She released her grip, tracing down Gu Lai's elegant jawline to her slender neck. Jiang Yi gently grasped her hand, his thumb resting on her protruding throat.
“You really know how to hurt me. When we argued, you asked me if I still loved you. After you brought up divorce, you reminded me to be careful with our relationship. Just now, you even said ‘I’d rather.’ What can I do to make you feel secure? You have to tell me, A-Lai.”
Jiang Yi's upturned eyes met hers with a sharp yet sorrowful gaze. Gu Lai rarely saw her with such intense emotions, and she almost forced herself to meet his gaze.
Gu Lai wanted to raise his hand to touch the corner of her reddened eyes, but under her intimidating gaze, he couldn't lift his hand.
Just when Gu Lai thought Jiang Yi would say something else, Jiang Yi suddenly stopped, lowered his head, and closed his eyes.
"When I came here, I was thinking about how to subtly confirm things with you, how to tell you. But when I asked you to be completely open about everything, and you actually did, I broke down again."
“It’s okay,” Gu Lai said softly. “It’s okay, this is fine. I know what you mean now.”
Jiang Yi lifted his eyelids to glance at her.
Gu Lai wrapped her arms around her, naturally placing them on her waist. Jiang Yi had dimples on her lower back, and she couldn't help but want to touch them every time.
“I know… I just said the wrong thing.” Gu Lai looked at her seriously and said, “There is no ‘would rather,’ Jiang Yi, I would never think that way.”
Jiang Yi stared at her for a while, then suddenly said, "The compensation to the victim's family has been sufficient, and they have signed an agreement that they will not say anything more. As for Aunt Luo... she has been sent to a sanatorium."
Gu Lai paused for a moment, then said, "Okay."
"As for what happened the year before last... I've almost forgotten about it, but back then I was still worried that you would run away for some random reason."
Gu Lai murmured, "Now I believe you've truly forgotten."
Jiang Yi: "?"
Gu Lai: "At the time, I didn't think you were 'afraid' at all."
“Of course you know nothing,” Jiang Yi said, then chuckled self-deprecatingly. “I should have told you back then.”
"The best time is always now, that's what you said," Gu Lai said softly. "Don't regret it."
"I never regretted any of the choices I made until I met you. With you, I've almost used up all my regrets... Hmm, wait, don't move!"
Jiang Yi grabbed Gu Lai's forearm, who was acting up, and looked at her reproachfully: "Speak properly."
Gu Lai tilted her head slightly, opened her clear eyes wide, and looked up at her innocently: "I didn't do anything, you can say whatever you want."
Jiang Yi met her gaze, remained silent for a few seconds, then gave in and let go: "I've already forgotten."
"President Jiang's self-control is still lacking; she's already middle-aged." Gu Lai glanced at her teasingly, and before Jiang Yi could raise an eyebrow to refute, she continued, "What have you regretted?"
"I regret... I regret not telling you many things. I thought of myself as invincible and you as too weak—even though I know that's not true."
"The desire to protect is also a form of love."
"That's called a mother-daughter relationship, we're not like that."
Gu Lai chuckled, "So what kind of people are we?"
"Braised pork ribs, the kind with big braised pork ribs, really flavorful."
Jiang Yi was referring to the couple's name, Jiang Gu.
Gu Lai couldn't stop laughing, burying her face in Jiang Yi's stomach as she laughed, shaking and trembling, with a continuous warmth penetrating through his clothes.
Jiang Yi helplessly patted her shoulder: "Stop laughing, Your Highness."
Gu Lai tilted her head back, her eyes crinkling, and rested her chin against her lower abdomen: "You can say it so naturally now."
Jiang Yi tried his best to guide his fans to come up with a nice-sounding phrase, but he never expected that the capitalist's lone efforts couldn't withstand the vast ocean of the people. This phrase just became popular among netizens because it was so corny and vulgar.
Gu Lai still feels a little wistful when she thinks about it now: "I still miss how determined you were to come up with that CP name back then."
Jiang Yi sighed: "When people get old, they have to compromise, it's different from before."
Gu Lai: "You're making it sound like decades have passed, but actually only ten years have gone by."
Jiang Yi: "Isn't ten years enough? There are some things that you can understand in ten years."
For example, I have always loved you.
Jiang Yi didn't say the second half of the sentence aloud, but Gu Lai vaguely sensed it.
She looked up at Jiang Yi, her lips moving slightly, as if she wanted to say something but hesitated.
Jiang Yi gently cradled the back of her head and asked, "Did I offend you just now? What do you want to say?"
Gu Lai shook her head in her palm: "No..." she sighed, "I'm just a little hesitant."
Jiang Yi gazed at her quietly.
Under such gazes, Gu Lai naturally felt encouraged, and that she wouldn't be condemned for saying anything.
She said it easily: "Last time at the hospital I asked why, and this time I want to ask again... I want to ask you if you regret not saying a word after I brought up divorce."
Jiang Yi asked gently, "Do you regret bringing it up?"
Perhaps the best answer is yes, Gu Lai thought, but these past few days they have been in constant contact, yet neither of them has mentioned the still-existing agreement again.
The cracks still exist objectively.
Gu Lai said somewhat blankly, "I don't know."
Jiang Yi smiled and said, "I wouldn't say I regret it. When I heard it, I only had one option: to remain silent. What I regret is pushing the situation to that point, but that would leave too many things to regret. If it takes a lot of effort to heal, then fine."
But aren't you afraid that this silence will cause the reconciliation to fail?
Gu Lai didn't ask any questions. She simply looked into Jiang Yi's smiling eyes and naturally came to a negative answer.
There are only two conditions for a successful reconciliation: either sufficient mutual benefit or sufficient love. Gu Lai didn't believe that Jiang Yi, who had previously been suspicious, would have such strong confidence in Gu Lai's love.
She must have gained confidence in herself.
Gu Lai suddenly felt that the familiar Jiang Yi hadn't completely changed; it was just that the sharp and ambitious young version had gradually become more composed.
If we go back to their first meeting, Jiang Yi might not have directly invited her, but instead let her walk into his trap step by step until she took the initiative to speak.
...yet she would become completely infatuated with it.
Gu Lai took a deep sniff of Jiang Yi's fragrance and began to laugh silently.
"There's really no need to regret it. There are countless outstanding people in the world, but no one before you has ever moved me. Even if I feel insecure, it's probably because I met a goddess."
Gu Lai paused for a moment: "To me, you are like 'having seen the ocean, other waters are nothing; having seen the clouds of Wushan, other clouds are nothing.'"
Jiang Yi gazed at her with a reserved yet smug expression, then lowered his head and kissed the crown of her head.
Gu Lai slowly looked up: "Where is the thing you brought for me?"
"Um?"
Gu Lai blinked slowly at her: "I want to see Wushan."
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I'm late, almost had to take the day off, and I might be late again tomorrow, sob sob sob.
Thanks for the landmine, sweetheart:
dustlastar, 1 landmine
March, Little i wants to sleep, 1 grenade
March, 1 rocket launcher
Thank you for the nutrient solution, sweetheart:
dustlastar, M, Irrigate with nutrient solution +1
March, Flat Cola, Irrigate with Nutrient Solution +10
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