Chapter 210 Even if I don't tell you, you should know
It was already late when Han Jianye came back from the meeting, and he walked through the corridor with heavy steps.
When he passed by Ye Bai's room, he saw through the faint light coming through the crack in the door that the lights in the room were off and there was silence. He guessed that Ye Bai had already fallen asleep.
In an instant, an inexplicable emotion surged into his heart, like grievance and loss, which made him frown.
Normally, he would open the door without hesitation, throw himself into Ye Bai's arms, and act coquettishly, but tonight, he just turned around silently and went straight back to his bedroom.
Although the lights in Ye Bai's room were off, he did not really fall asleep.
He clearly heard the sound of Han Jianye opening the door when he came back, and his heartbeat quickened.
He thought that Han Jianye would come uninvited as usual, crawl into his bed, cling to him and make him angry.
But this time, the room was surprisingly quiet. There were no familiar footsteps or familiar hugs.
Ye Bai's heart trembled slightly, and an unfamiliar sense of loss surged into his heart.
These days, Han Jianye seemed to be less enthusiastic towards him and took the initiative less often. He had unknowingly become accustomed to Han Jianye's enthusiasm.
Time passed by minute by minute. After about half an hour, Ye Bai still didn't wait for Han Jianye to push the door open.
He couldn't help but get out of bed and prepare to pour a glass of water to moisten his throat.
As soon as he walked into the living room, he saw Han Jianye standing on the balcony with a bottle of beer in his hand. The moonlight sprinkled on him, casting a lonely shadow.
Ye Bai's footsteps paused slightly. Han Jianye seemed to notice his movement. He turned around slowly, his eyes stayed on Ye Bai for a few seconds, but he said nothing. He just turned around again, continued to raise the bottle and drank silently.
Ye Bai stood there awkwardly. He took a deep breath and mustered up the courage to walk towards Han Jianye. "What's wrong with you? I feel like you've been worried lately."
Ye Bai's voice was cautious, trying to break the silent deadlock.
Han Jianye turned slowly and his eyes fell on Ye Bai. His eyes were deep and dark, making it impossible to see through his emotions.
He pursed his lips and said in a cold tone: "Don't you hate me sticking to you?"
After saying that, he turned around again and continued drinking, as if he was using alcohol to numb his emotions.
Ye Bai was stunned, his eyes were surprised: "I..."
He wanted to say something but stopped himself, as if something was stuck in his throat and he didn't know how to respond.
"Didn't I tell you? If you don't like it, I won't force you."
"So this is what you care about?" Ye Bai raised his head, his eyes full of confusion.
"Well, what else? You won't let me hug you or get close to you, so I'll grant your wish. Isn't this what you want?"
After hearing this, Ye Bai was speechless for a moment.
Han Jianye found that he had finished the beer in his hand in just two or three gulps, so he planned to go to the refrigerator to get another can of beer.
Ye Bai thought he was going to leave, and felt heavy in his heart. He subconsciously grabbed the corner of his clothes and said anxiously, "Let's communicate properly, don't leave."
Han Jianye stopped walking, looked down at Ye Bai's hand holding the corner of his clothes, then looked at his anxious face, a hint of self-deprecating smile appeared on the corner of his mouth, and he whispered: "So who is the person who has not been communicating with me properly all this time?"
“…”
Han Jianye put his hands in his pockets, lowered his head and stared at Ye Bai, his tone serious and earnest: "You are always like this, either you don't say anything, or you stop talking halfway. So, is it me who doesn't want to communicate with you properly? I have no reservations with you, I have confessed everything, but what about you? Ask yourself, who didn't communicate properly?"
Ye Bai was shocked when he heard these words. He lowered his head and pursed his lips. He was silent for a moment, thinking secretly in his heart: It seems... it is indeed my problem.
Seeing that he remained silent, Han Jianye turned around and was about to leave.
Ye Bai immediately stopped him, "Do I have to say it out loud if I like you?"
Han Jianye was stunned. He turned around and stared at Ye Bai, and responded: "How can I know whether you like me or not if you don't say it?"
"You should know even if I don't tell you."
After hearing this, Han Jianye smiled speechlessly, "I'm not a worm in your stomach, how do I know what you're thinking?"
"I...I just thought you would understand."
"I don't understand." Han Jianye immediately shook his head to deny it.
"I think you should understand."
Otherwise I wouldn't stay here and live with you.
Han Jianye repeated, "I don't understand. In my opinion, words that are not spoken do not count. I don't want to guess. You have to give me an accurate number so that I can know what you think of me. This is very important to me."
Ye Bai clenched his hands, raised his eyes and looked at him. He moved his lips and wanted to say something, but the words could not come out.
Han Jianye waited patiently for Ye Bai's answer.
After a moment, Ye Bai remained silent.
"Ye Bai, what exactly do you think? Tell me. As long as you explain it clearly, I promise not to pester you anymore and I will let you go free."
Ye Bai frowned, looking embarrassed, "I... I just feel that there are some things that you can sense from my actions even if I don't say it."
"I can indeed feel it, but I don't know if it's accurate. After all, just one word from you is worth a thousand words from me."
Ye Bai raised his eyes to look at him and repeated: "Sometimes feelings won't lie to you."
"So? Is it so difficult for you to say it?"
“………”
After these words were spoken, Ye Bai fell into a brief silence again.
Han Jianye felt a little disappointed. He sighed and said calmly, "You have an early shift tomorrow, go back to sleep."
Ye Bai turned around and his eyes fell on Han Jianye's lonely back. For a moment, he didn't know what to say and his heart was full of complicated emotions.
Han Jianye returned to the room and sighed deeply. Just now, he almost couldn't help but hug Ye Bai tightly in his arms and then severely "punish" his stubborn mouth.
But he always understood that if Ye Bai was unwilling, his frequent proactive and difficult behavior would only push Ye Bai further away.
In order to calm his inner struggle, he could only drink to drown his sorrows, fall asleep quickly, and stop thinking about the little guy whom he loved and hated.
Ye Bai walked to Han Jianye's door, raised his hand slightly, and then slowly lowered it.
He wanted to knock on the door and muster up the courage to say everything in his heart, but the words turned around in his throat several times and were finally swallowed back by him.
He stood at the door, hesitated for a long time, and finally put down his hand silently, turned around and went back to his room.