Social Death Patient 049
This was also the first time that Bai Jiesui saw Yan Yushan so closely. She had searched for him online out of curiosity before.
Slightly different from his online image, Yan Yushan in private does not have such a strong sense of distance. In terms of facial features and looks, he is more three-dimensional and refined than on the screen. He is worthy of his fans' title of "the century's god of face".
I don’t know if he’s good at taking care of himself or if he’s born with good conditions, but his face doesn’t show his age. He’s clearly in his forties, but few people would doubt that he’s in his early thirties.
When A Shen saw Yan Yushan for the first time, he felt that he was more like Bai Jie Sui's biological brother than her biological father.
Bai Jiesui didn't say anything after entering the room. She knew Yan Yushan was staring at her, so she let him look at her openly, but had no intention of speaking.
Xiao Chu went back and closed the door, and the room, which was already silent, became even quieter.
Xiao Chu thought that Yan Yushan had been waiting for so long that his patience had long been exhausted, and he should be eager to get down to business.
His boss just stared at Bai Jusui without saying a word.
The look in his eyes was as if he was looking at an old acquaintance, someone he cared about very much, so much so that he didn't notice that his behavior was a bit inappropriate and that he shouldn't stare at a girl he met for the first time.
At that time, Xiao Chu had a guess in his mind: could it be that his boss had some connection with Dr. Bai?
"Brother Yan..." Xiao Chu cleared his throat and called out first. Seeing that Yan Yushan did not respond, he raised his voice and called out again.
This time Yan Yushan finally heard it and came to his senses.
From looking at her through the small window glass just now to now they were face to face, less than five meters apart, Yan Yushan did not miss any details on her face.
Yan Yushan discovered that there were too many details on her face that overlapped with Bai Shuang's, and it was almost exactly the same as the face that was deeply engraved in his mind and treasured in his wallet.
He became more and more convinced that the girl in front of him must be Bai Shuang's child.
This excitement made him completely ignore the surrounding environment and lose the ability to coordinate his hands and feet.
He originally planned to pull out a stool for Bai Jiesui himself, but he didn't notice the small round table in front of him and bumped into it with his foot.
The small round table was almost overturned, and his mobile phone on the table fell to the ground. Fortunately, there was a carpet on the floor, so his phone was not broken.
Yan Yushan rarely gets so flustered, and fortunately he made a mistake, which allowed him to calm down a little and socialize normally.
"Sorry, that's rude. Let's sit down over here and talk." Yan Yushan made a gesture of invitation to them and invited Bai Jiesui to sit on the sofa against the wall.
Out of politeness, Bai Jiesui nodded, chose a single sofa seat, and walked over to sit down.
Yan Yushan only moved after seeing her leave and followed her.
Xiao Chu silently picked up the phone that Yan Yushan had just dropped on the ground. Zhuo Qi was still calling in persistently, but Xiao Chu pretended not to see it and put it on the small round table and ignored it.
He pulled out the chair in front of the small round table, but found that someone had already sat down opposite him.
It was Dr. Bai's androgynous assistant, who was looking Yan Yushan up and down with great interest, with her chin propped up.
Xiao Chu felt that he seemed to see a hint of interest in watching the show from his movements and eyes.
On the other side, Bai Jiesui and Yan Yushan were neither far nor close, with a small coffee table between them.
"Hello Xiaobai, I am..." Yan Yushan wanted to introduce himself first, but suddenly got stuck.
He found that he didn't know how to introduce himself.
I might be your mother's ex-boyfriend?
He couldn't say the word "ex-boyfriend". Call him stubborn, he still didn't think that he and Bai Shuang had broken up. It was Bai Shuang who proposed it unilaterally, and he hadn't agreed yet.
He was still racking his brains over the title, but Bai Jiesui spoke first.
"I know you."
Yan Yushan's eyes lit up. He thought Bai Shuang had mentioned him to her. At the same time, his blood pressure rose and his heartbeat accelerated uncontrollably.
"I heard that you are the son of Grandma Yan next door. Did she ask you to come here?"
Yan Yushan's excitement was like being poured with a bucket of cold water.
Then he shook his head and laughed, laughing at himself for being too self-indulgent.
"Yes, I am the son of the grandmother next door, Yan Xujin, but the old lady didn't ask me to come here. I came to see you on my own."
Bai Jiesui didn't respond, but listened attentively.
For Yan Yushan, it took a lot of courage to inquire about Bai Shuang.
Perhaps it was because he was homesick. He hadn't heard from her for twenty years. The more he wanted to know about Bai Shuang's news, the more he was afraid to hear from her.
He lowered his head and took several deep breaths. Finally, he prepared himself mentally and looked up at the white mustard spike opposite him.
"Xiaobai, may I ask what your mother's name is?"
After asking this question, his eyes were fixed on Bai Jiesui, waiting for her answer.
Bai Jiesui asked cautiously, "What do you want from me, Mr. Yan, by asking my mother's name?"
Yan Yushan said frankly: "To be honest, seeing you reminds me of an old friend. You two really look alike, so I took the liberty to come and disturb you today."
Bai Jiesui: "There are so many people who look alike. A big star like Mr. Yan must have many look-alike imitators online. Could it be that they are all related to Mr. Yan?"
Xiao Chu thought that he was worthy of being Doctor Bai. If anyone else saw Yan Yushan, they would be so happy that they would be at a loss as to what to do. They would definitely answer every question. There was no one else in the whole country who could be so aggressive towards his boss.
Yan Yushan said awkwardly, "You can say I'm being rude, and I know my behavior is presumptuous, but I haven't heard from her for twenty-three years, ten months, and three days. I've been trying to find her all the time, so I don't want to miss any opportunity to learn about her."
Bai Jiesui didn't know whether this was his true feelings or mostly acting.
After all, his acting skills are professional and have been recognized by domestic and foreign professionals and the general public.
No matter how emotionally he spoke, Bai Jiesui still did not show much emotional change, as if she was listening to a topic that had nothing to do with her.
Bai Jiesui: "Then Mr. Yan would personally verify every person he sees who bears a passing resemblance to an old friend. I wonder how many people Mr. Yan has verified so far?"
Yan Yushan was so nervous and excited before that he didn't pay much attention to Bai Jiesui's attitude.
Now that his emotions had returned to normal, he discovered that White Mustard Seed seemed to have a natural hostility towards him.
It was their first meeting, and although his behavior was a little presumptuous, it was not enough to offend her.
Even if Bai Jiesui was dissatisfied with him, she should not be so hostile towards him for the sake of his old lady and old man.
Yan Yushan couldn't tell where her hostility came from, but he felt that this was a key point worth observing.
He stared into Bai Jiesui's eyes and said, "You're the first one. The resemblance between you and her is only one aspect, but I trust my intuition even more. I had a very strong intuition the first time I saw you, Xiaobai. I don't know if you understand the profession of actor, but we all have strong insight and empathy, so our sixth sense is also very accurate."
Bai Jiesui blinked as if she didn't understand. "It would be a shame if I didn't buy a lottery ticket for this sixth sense."
Yan Yushan thought to himself, as expected, she is obviously a smart person, but she has to pretend to be stupid in front of him.
The more she tried to cover up, the more Yan Yushan felt that he had made the right choice this time.
So he went straight to the point and asked, "Xiaobai, is your mother's name Baishuang?"
Although he said he was asking, he actually already had the answer, and he used an affirmative sentence.
Now Bai Jiesui has two choices: admit it or deny it.
If you just want to completely cut off Yan Yushan's thoughts, you must deny it and then make up another name.
But she had changed her mind before and didn't have to deny their relationship.
After careful consideration, she feigned surprise and said, "What a coincidence! Mr. Yan's old friend also has this name."
Yan Yushan's heart was almost beating in his throat.
"Is it really white frost?" He stood up suddenly and took a step forward eagerly.
"Mr. Yan, don't get excited. It's just the names that are similar." Bai Jiesui remained calm.
Yan Yushan was sure that she just didn't want to admit that Bai Shuang and her mother were the same person.
He took out the wallet he carried with him, took out the photo from it, took a step forward, and gently placed the photo on the coffee table in front of Bai Jiesui.
"Not only do they have the same name, they look the same too, right?"
This is a two-inch single-person photo. From the style of the photo alone, you can tell that it has a certain sense of age, but the photo has been well protected and carefully laminated, and it looks like new. The picture of the person in it is frozen as if it happened yesterday.
Bai Jiesui actually has no impression of her mother. She was too young when the accident happened and has no memory of her mother at all.
The old man helped her collect a few photos of her mother, but only a few.
And the few films her mother had made.
Bai Jiesui can only know his mother through video materials and a few photos.
She watched the few films she had over and over again countless times and could recite them by heart.
The few photos she had kept from childhood to adulthood were already torn and worn out.
It's nothing like the one in front of me, it's as brand new as if it had just been developed.
It was also the first time she saw a different mother. Her eyes were full of affection and light, like someone who was loved, and her whole body exuded an aura of happiness.
She was very different from the mother she saw in the drama and the calm and reserved mother in the photo.
Bai Jiesui looked at the photo in front of her with almost greedy eyes, wanting to see the mother she had never known through the photo.
People's truest reactions will not lie.
Yan Yushan didn't even need her answer, he was very sure of Bai Jiesui's identity.
He breathed a sigh of relief and sat on the sofa next to him.
"I'm sure you've guessed it. I was with your mother before, but due to some complicated reasons, she left without saying goodbye. I haven't heard from her since. She..."
He suddenly stopped mid-sentence.
Bai Jiesui didn't hear the key information that she was most concerned about, so she turned her head to look at him, waiting for him to say the next words.
Before this, Yan Yushan was already mentally prepared. He learned from his old lady that Xiaobai's mother had passed away long ago.
But asking him to ask it in person now would be more painful than letting him die.
"She..." Yan Yushan tried to speak again several times, but his trembling throat could not make a normal sound.
Finally, he lowered his head and asked, almost choking with sobs, "Is she... still there?"
Bai Jiesui did not answer immediately, but silently looked at her mother's brightly smiling face in the photo.
After a long moment, he said, "She died unexpectedly when I was very young. It's been over 20 years."
As soon as she finished speaking, she heard a "click" sound beside her ear.
Bai Jiesui turned her head and saw that he had indeed not been able to control his emotions, and the carpet at his feet had been stained with water.
As a high-level actor, Yan Yushan can manage his expression even when he is sad and crying. He does not have tears and his facial features are not distorted.
He shed tears alone, as unmoved as a mountain, his loneliness revealing a sense of decadence and brokenness.
This scene really scared Xiao Chu. He actually saw Yan Yushan crying in his lifetime. Not in the play, but crying with true emotions outside the play.
This was his incredible boss who remained calm even when faced with a mountain collapse, and was steady and rational.
Today, Xiao Chu can be said to have broadened his horizons.
After following Yan Yushan for so long, this was the first time he heard that his boss still had a white moonlight in his heart.
His boss kept it a secret too tightly. Not only did he not know about it, but even the gossip media hadn't heard a word about it to this day.
Now analyzing Yan Yushan's behavior again, everything makes sense.
But he really didn't expect that his boss, who has won three Golden Horse Awards and is in the entertainment industry where fame and fortune reign, could be so loyal.
Not only has he remained single for more than 20 years, but he has also preserved Bai Yueguang's photos so well.
Xiao Chu had to pay high respects to Dr. Xiaobai's mother.
Bai Jiesui is not like Xiao Chu. She has followed Yan Yushan for more than ten years and knows what kind of person he is usually like, so she is shocked by Yan Yushan's state.
In Bai Jiesui's opinion, this was just an ordinary person being moved by emotions.
People will always miss the person they liked when they were young, but it doesn’t necessarily mean that they still like that person that much. They may just be crying for their past or feeling sorry for her mother who passed away too early.
Also, thinking about his relationship with Hua Xin, Bai Jie Sui suddenly felt that everything was boring.
Xiao Chu saw that his boss couldn't stop venting his emotions and was worried about his red and swollen eyes.
If Yan Yushan was photographed with swollen eyes, or if he was discovered by the crew when he returned to the set, it would inevitably lead to some speculation, which would be troublesome.
Xiao Chu found a tissue and gave it to Yan Yushan, and kindly reminded him to control his emotions.
Fortunately, Yan Yushan is still a rational person. He had prepared himself mentally before and finally controlled his emotions.
It took him nearly five minutes to adjust himself and he finally calmed down, but his eyes and nose were still a little red.
Even though he looks so disheveled, it still doesn't prevent him from being a handsome guy. On the contrary, his fragility and dishevelment add to his charm.
Bai Jiesui was helpless. Although her mother didn't find a suitable person, she had good aesthetic taste and picked a handsome guy who still looked good even when he was old.
"I'm sorry, I lost my composure just now." Yan Yushan was somewhat embarrassed to lose his composure in front of his juniors.
Bai Jiesui shook his head and said nothing more.
"Can you tell me where your mother's grave is?" Yan Yushan spoke with a strong nasal tone.
Bai Jiesui pursed her lips, unsure whether she should tell him.
"I have a lot of things I want to say to her. I've kept them in my heart for a long time. Xiaobai, can you fulfill this little wish of mine?" Yan Yushan looked at her expectantly.
Perhaps because he is an excellent actor, he has a strong ability to inspire empathy. If you stare at him, you will easily be influenced by him and be led by him.
Bai Jiesui simply turned away and didn't look him in the eye.
"You want to see her, but she doesn't necessarily want to see you."
Then Yan Yushan's eyes dimmed. This sentence really hurt him a lot.
Bai Shuang left without saying goodbye, probably because she didn't want to see him.
You didn't want to see him when he was alive, and you probably don't want him to appear at your grave after you die.
He smiled bitterly and said, "I know she doesn't want to see me, but I must see her. There are so many things I didn't have time to say to her. If she had waited for me for just one more day, I would have gone back. I even brought her the gift she wanted most, but she didn't wait for me. She chose to leave without saying goodbye. I want to tell her what I didn't say, and I still owe her countless apologies..."
Before, Bai Jiesui had always been suspicious of him, thinking that he might be acting.
But Bai Jiesui had been watching for so long and couldn't detect any signs of fakeness in his performance.
Besides, he wouldn't have to act in front of himself. There were no outsiders in the room, and his identity didn't require him to create a sentimental persona.
It seemed more like he really wanted to reminisce with his former lover.
However, Bai Jiesui didn't want to tell him her mother's grave site too easily. It was not that easy.
"I'd better ask her first. If she doesn't object, I'll tell you."
Yan Yushan was stunned for a moment in disbelief and wanted to say something else.
Bai Jiesui said, "If you don't want to wait, forget it, just pretend I never said anything."
If there was a time and date, Yan Yushan could certainly wait, but the problem was that at the moment it was just Bai Jie Sui's "question" without any time limit.
However, he could not raise any objections now as he had no initiative.
"I can wait. Xiaobai, whenever you are willing to contact me, you can call me anytime."
As he said this, he asked Xiao Chu for paper and pen, and wrote down his name and phone number himself.
He handed Bai Jiesui a piece of paper with his phone number written on it and said, "If you encounter any trouble, you can also call me and I will help you solve it."
"Thank you, but I haven't encountered any trouble, so please don't bother with me, Mr. Yan."
Yan Yushan hesitated for a long time. Although he didn't want to bring up this topic, he finally said it.
"I heard that your biological father is very irresponsible and doesn't want to acknowledge you. If you need my help—"
Before he could finish his words, he suddenly heard a "puff".
Despite his calm and steady personality, Asan couldn't help but laugh out loud.
It's hard to describe Bai Jiesui's expression.
Yan Yushan and Xiao Chu had no idea what he was laughing at, but he had already ruined the atmosphere.
"Xiaobai, your scumbag father——"
Yan Yushan wanted to continue talking about this topic with Bai Jiesu, but was stopped in time by Bai Jiesu.
If this continued, she would lose control of her expression.
"Don't worry about it, Mr. Yan. I've already taken care of this matter."
Yan Yushan didn't know whether he was a little disappointed or a little relieved.
I was disappointed that I couldn't find out who the man Bai Shuang married was, but I was glad that the topic was stopped in time and did not continue to provoke him.
At this time, Bai Jiesui's phone rang. It was Director Gao looking for her.
"Mr. Yan, I have something else to do, so I'll leave first."
Yan Yushan sent her to the door, his eyes full of love as he saw her off.
"Be careful when you go back. No matter what happens, you can come to me. If you don't want to come to me, you can also come to our old lady. You don't have to treat us as outsiders."
Yan Yushan knew that he would never get married in this life and would never have his own children. No matter who Bai Jiesui's father was, as long as she was Bai Shuang's child, he was willing to treat her as his own child.
"You also know that our old lady and old man both like you. Since they don't want to recognize you, you should just treat our family as your home. We will definitely cherish you more than they do."
His eyes were earnest and his words were sincere, he was almost saying directly, "Please recognize me as your father."
Asan couldn't bear to listen any longer. He knew he would lose his composure if he continued, so he pushed the door open and went out first.
Bai Jiesui suddenly became curious and asked with a half-smile, "Why do you believe what I say so much? Are you sure I'm not lying to you? I made up the story about my mother just to gain your trust."
Yan Yushan smiled for the first time in this room.
"Then can you also make up a tomb for your mother?"
Bai Jiesui pursed her lips and stopped smiling, saying nothing more. She pushed open the door and walked out.
Yan Yushan stared at the direction she left, with a smile on his face that lingered for a long time.
The little girl was still too young. She thought she was disguising herself very well, but she didn't know that her face couldn't hide anything.
In the past, Yan Yushan felt that life was boring and there was nothing to do except work. Today, when he learned about Xiaobai's existence, he found that life had become much more interesting and more hopeful.
Xiao Chu understood that his boss loved his wife and loved everyone in her.
Just based on Yan Yushan's loving eyes, he was ready to treat Dr. Bai as his own daughter.
Xiao Chu increasingly felt that Dr. Bai's mother was not simple.
"Xiao Chu, book two new tickets from the nearest airport to return to the crew." Yan Yushan just wanted to return to the crew early and finish filming as soon as possible so that he could free up time.
Xiao Chu booked the ticket very quickly and booked a flight for the afternoon in just a few minutes.
Before leaving, Yan Yushan prepared to put Bai Shuang's photo back into his wallet.
As a result, the coffee table was empty and Bai Shuang's photo had long disappeared.
It was obvious who had taken it.
Yan Yushan laughed helplessly.
Although he denies it, things come to him quickly.
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