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Looking at the man who was still frowning in his sleep, Aruo had an indescribable feeling. She was clearly not the one hurt, but her heart ached. She hoped that he would get up and jump a few times to prove that he was fine, but she also wanted to continue to look at his peaceful sleeping face unscrupulously.
Carefully holding his hand, she rubbed it against her face gently. She did not resist the desire to cherish him. "Su Feng, I feel like I'm at a crossroads in my life."
Perhaps it was her warmth that reassured him, his frown gradually loosening, his expression so gentle it was hard to look away. Aruo gently tapped his forehead, stroked his beautiful brows, and whispered, "Nothing here is good, except for you... Everything there is good, but without you."
Computers and the Internet were fine, but because of Su Zirui, she actually thought that it was okay to not have sanitary napkins... This thought made her panic.
She had always considered herself rather cold-hearted, interacting with others under the guise of having more friends and opening up new avenues. Aside from Cai Xin, there wasn't anyone she truly couldn't let go of. Her behavior wasn't like that of an ordinary woman, stubbornly retaining the characteristics of a modern person. She always felt that if the opportunity arose, or if that day ever arrived, she could simply walk away, unwaveringly and calmly facing death.
Perhaps it was an obsession. Death was a possibility for her to go home. She was not very afraid, and even had a vague expectation. It was just that the promise between her and Shen Nan made her dare not act recklessly, and she had to wait until that time.
But starting from Yangzhou, she realized that her feelings for Su Zirui were not as deep as those for others. Every step he took towards her was shaking her thoughts. It was okay when he was cold, but it was as if he had changed his temperament and became so gentle that she could not resist.
"You make me sad... This is not good, it will make me waver." Her tone was disgusted, but the look in her eyes was gentle, which she had not noticed. Sitting on the edge of the bed, thinking about nothing, just looking at him made her feel at ease. This sense of security was what she had been pursuing for too long, and she had always longed for it.
Suddenly, a large hand grabbed her wrist precisely, frightening her so much that she almost screamed.
"What are you wavering about?" His lazy voice was a little hoarse, and his eyes were clear without any trace of sleepiness.
Aruo patted his chest to calm himself down and glared at him, "You didn't sleep?"
His sharp gaze fell on her face, and he stared at her quietly, with a meaningful look that made her scattered mind shudder. Then he whispered, "It hurts."
Aruo was speechless for a moment and said unhappily, "If your back is injured, don't lie down. Sleep on your stomach or on your side."
Su Zirui hummed lightly, his eyes still fixed on her, "You haven't said anything about wavering yet."
Aruo lowered his eyes and asked instead of answering, "How did you get the injury on your back?"
This look and tone were somewhat similar to the one he used when he interrogated her. A cold look flashed across his eyes, and Su Zirui turned his face inwards. "I don't want to see you right now. Go back."
His voice has always been cold, and these words seemed even more cold and indifferent, which would be hurtful to those who were not aware of the situation.
This man! She glared at him with a look of confusion, then pursed her lips and said, "Then I'm leaving."
"Let's go." Su Zirui closed his eyes.
"You really left." Aruo couldn't help laughing, her eyebrows curved, and she pulled his black hair scattered on the pillow in a funny way.
"Go away, you're an eyesore." The sarcasm in the cold tone faded away, and the ending tone rose slightly, with a soft and coquettish tone.
Aruo smiled and lay on the edge of the bed, pulling her hand that was tightly clenched by him, "You said it so bluntly, why don't you let go, Master Su."
The man who said he didn't want to see her and wanted her to leave held her hands and wrapped them around his waist.
Alas, a man who says one thing and means another.
This action made his back appear right in front of her eyes. The snow-white undershirt was bleeding from the wound caused by lying down just now. Now there were bloodstains on the white clothes, which was shocking.
A Ruo felt a sudden sharp pain in his heart, and his eyes were sore. "Bad guy, you did it on purpose."
Deliberately making her feel sad and distressed.
"Beili said that His Majesty wanted to grant you a marriage before, but you refused..." With her hands forced to wrap around his waist, Aruo had to half-lie on the edge of the bed and spoke softly.
He tightened his grip on her hand and asked without turning his head, "What do you want to say?"
The tone was gentle but cool, making Aruo feel a chill on his neck.
"...I want to say that Lord Su did a good job." Aruo said tactfully, her voice sweet.
He didn't turn around. He was silent for a long moment before he spoke softly, "My mother was born into the Guiyuan Marquisate. She was my father's best choice at the time. After she left, my father's official position rose higher and higher, and my uncles had always wanted to marry into the family. When I returned from the northwest, the Marquisate wanted to marry my cousin, who had just come of age."
At that time, he had just finished dealing with the Tiger Stronghold, and his ruthless aura hadn't yet subsided. His uncles said that his cousin had long admired him, but at the first sight of him, she collapsed in fear. His unexpected glance had caused her to lose control of her bladder...
The news was kept secret by both families, but the Marquis's residence never dared to mention the marriage again. The cousin, out of shame and anger, attempted suicide but failed, then she chopped off her hair and became a nun. Anyone with connections in the capital could find out some of the inside story. After that, he finally became quieter, and fewer fools appeared before him.
"If I'm given a marriage, it's mostly with this type of woman. I don't want to spend my life with a woman who fears me."
Aruo was so amused by what she heard that she didn't know whether to pity him or her cousin. She even thought, rather unscrupulously, that the girl chosen for the marriage would probably cry too when she found out.
"Who do you want to spend your life with?"
He didn't say anything, but loosened his grip on her wrist, pried open her knuckles with his long fingers, and intertwined his fingers with hers.
A heat hotter than her own burned from her palms all the way to her heart. Tired of holding on, Aruo simply half-lay down behind him, her free hand ruffling his loose black hair. Then, facing countless vicious criminals, who remained impassive, her ears quietly blushed.
The rare silence at this moment had some lingering charm, even though he still seemed angry and refused to turn around.
"When I was still alive, I was already living on the streets. It was like the beginning of hell. I immediately wanted to find a hemp rope to end my life. But before I found the hemp rope, I met Yiyuan, that damn liar. Because I was so angry about being cheated, we fought with each other for a while and couldn't tell who was winning. Later, Meng Batian came to my house. I didn't know how terrible he was, so I cheated Yiyuan into giving him... I didn't expect that I still had a conscience, so I followed him to Menghuzhai and entered another hell." When Aruo talked about the past, he no longer felt as depressed as before, and could talk about that period of time calmly.
After the Tiger Village was destroyed, Mr. Shen found her and brought her back to Qishan.
"Mr. Shen didn't hide it from me. I knew at that time that I came into this world just to leave a way for my elder sister to survive."
The hand holding her suddenly tightened, but Aruo seemed not to notice and continued to tell her secret softly.
"My elder sister is the last child of the Shen family. She was born with a heart disease, and Old Shen also predicted that she wouldn't live past twenty. And I, he defied fate and found her... a chance to live. My elder sister got married at eighteen, and died in childbirth at twenty. Luo Ziran knew I could extend her life when Old Shen passed away, but before my elder sister died, he asked him to wait until I was eighteen before he could do anything."
When mentioning Shen Nan, Aruo still felt a dull pain in his heart.
Shen Nan was loved and pampered since childhood, but also suffered from physical torture and pain. She was very smart and very indifferent. She gave all her patience and love to Aruo. After Shen Lao's death, Aruo was always her first choice.
"Ajie was the best person to me in this world. Four years ago, before Master Jing took me away, I secretly went to see her for the last time."
Shen Nan knew that because of her, Aruo didn't really want to live in this world. That's why she didn't resist when Mr. Shen took her away, and she studied as she pleased. She accepted and waited to exchange her life for Shen Nan's.
But Shen Nan refused to accept this. Her temperament was indifferent, her physical limitations limiting even her emotions. Throughout her short life, she had been pampered but rarely reciprocated. Aruo was the only other in her life, the only casualness and trust amidst all the cautious treatment. In her final moments, Shen Nan gave up her role as Marquis Dingbei's wife and chose the identity of Aruo's sister. She wanted Aruo to leave these people behind, to explore a wider world, to find a connection, a connection that would make her want to live a good life. Because of her, Shen Nan had tricked Luo Ziran into giving her four years.
Even Qi Shaozhen didn't know all this.
"I promised to spend these four years seriously and find a way to let her soul rest in peace. I've been wandering around these past few years, and Caixin was the only one I hadn't arranged. When I was in Sizhou, I wanted to leave her with the Fang family, but I didn't expect such a farce... Now with Lord Lin and General Cheng, it's not impossible. But then, you showed up... So, Su Feng, what do you think I'm wavering about?"
She raised her empty hand slightly, and touched the wound on his back with her fingertips. Even though it was so light, he still trembled slightly for a moment.
"The distance between us goes far beyond family background and status..."
"Is it important?" Su Zirui slowly turned around and said coldly to her, "I already knew your identity and distance when I first locked you up in the prison."
Before he fell in love, he knew that they were different in the secular world, but so what? After his heart fell, she was not afraid of the secular world, and he was not afraid of these secular rules either.
He stared at her deeply, with endless love pouring out of his eyes, and a faint, almost paranoid, morbid light flashing.
Everyone was trying to stop him from having her, whether it was an arranged marriage or family rules... He just wanted her, a girl who could make him feel that there was light in his life and who could walk into his heart. He could overcome any obstacle as long as she lived for him.
He put his arm around her waist and held her in his arms. His breath was warm and gentle, brushing against her ears. "Ruoruo, don't give up on me."
The voice was clear and crisp, with a hint of hoarseness, sounding like a request but also like a seductive charm.
He is not Ning Caixin, not Yiyuan, and he will not allow her to give up joining hands with him.
Tears fell from her eyes without warning. Aruo smiled and nodded, leaning her forehead against his, "I'll try my best."
This somewhat perfunctory answer had already exhausted all her energy. She had things she had to do, but she also felt a lingering attachment to this world. Life was unpredictable, and faced with the affection he had fully exposed to her, she could only do her best to respond.
Su Zirui frowned in dissatisfaction, but he didn't push her any further. He reached out and wiped the tears from her face, his breath caressing her nose. "Okay, stop crying. You're not good-looking to begin with, and crying makes you look even uglier."
Aruo was so angry that she cried and laughed at the same time. She couldn't help but hit him, "How can I be ugly? Sister Ruxian said that with a little makeup, my appearance can surpass Furonglou..."
He originally wanted to tease her, but when he stretched out his hand, he hurt the wound on his back. Su Zirui was in so much pain that his face turned pale and his brows were furrowed.
"What's wrong? Does it hurt?" Aruo struggled to get up, but his hand hooked over her body, and his palm slid down to his chest. This position made her heart skip a beat. She stared blankly into his suddenly dark eyes, and their breaths blended together, and she felt an inexplicable tenderness.
Boom, boom, the violent heartbeat trembled under her palm, making her heart and soul intoxicated, "Su, Master Su..."
He placed a gentle kiss on her lips, extremely restrained, yet still nibbling on them with impatience, forcing her to open her teeth and dance with him. The fingertips that had been holding her hand stretched out, clasping them between her fingers, entwining them tightly on the mattress, leaving a distinct crease.
The corners of her eyes, tinged with a faint red, were etched with her alluring charm. Her shallow breathing, her loose, tangled hair, and her eyes, filled with him, each of these things easily ignited the fire in her veins, clamoring to claim the woman beneath her as his own. Those rules of self-control and propriety were shattered by the unfounded unease and the increasingly strong possessive desire, which only wanted her wholehearted response to soothe the lingering anxiety and emptiness in her heart.
It seems that only in this way can the person locked in the arms not be taken away.
"Ouch!" The wound suddenly twitched in pain as if it was deliberately reminding him, and Su Zirui frowned and paused.
The misty black eyes suddenly became clear, and Aruo didn't care about blushing, "Get up, let me see!"
Without saying anything, she pushed him to sit up, ripped open the belt of his underwear, and took off his shirt, without any ambiguity.
Su Zirui was glared at by her and looked like he was about to cry, so he had to turn around obediently.
On the back with beautiful and clear lines, there are deep whip marks, each of which has the skin turned inside out and oozing blood, which is shocking against the white skin.
Aruo gasped in shock, her eyes instantly reddened, and even her voice choked, "Why did you use such a heavy hand...it's too much."
Bei Li only said that he was punished with thirty lashes for her, and she never thought it was so serious.
"Are you touched? That's right, you must be touched, you must feel distressed, only then will you cherish me." Su Zirui looked back and chuckled, but his tone was ruthless and extremely evil.
Aruo stopped crying after being interrupted by him, and lowered her head to apply medicine to him. "Don't I cherish you enough? All my money has been spent on you recently."
"not enough."
She was also convinced. How could this person say such morbid words with such a gentle expression? Aruo shook her head without retreating, took the ointment beside the bed and applied it to him.
The warmth of his fingertips, held for so long, combined with the coolness of the ointment, touched her back, igniting a wave of intense heat that easily stirred his already restless heart. Each touch ignited a fire, yet he couldn't move, struggling to maintain a calm exterior, a thin layer of sweat forming on his back.
A burning restlessness coursed through his limbs and bones. Su Zirui half-closed his eyes, hiding all the insane thoughts that shouldn't be occurring at this moment. His usual restraint and forbearance were now at their most effective.
"Does it hurt?" Her voice was soft and tender, and she even lightened the force with which she brushed his back. It was like a sharp cat's claw being cut off and gently scratching his heart, making him feel itchy and numb.
Unable to bear this kind of pity, he endured it and waited until she applied the medicine before slowly extending his hand back. When she put her hand in his palm, he breathed a sigh of relief.
"It hurts." He coaxed her nonchalantly, "Please hurt me."
He wanted her to owe him a lot, and not dare to think about giving her life to that annoying ghost of Shen Nan. He wanted her to always remember that she owed him, remember to repay his share in this life, and live for him.
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