Embrace
After packing her luggage and saying goodbye to Yu Fan, Zhu Shiyi put on a beautiful makeup, went downstairs, and embarked on her journey home.
Before leaving, to thank Yu Fan for taking care of her, she secretly left him a gift: a lipstick.
Pan Yue arrived as promised. He quietly carried her luggage, acted as her driver, and took her to the airport, just like any other day.
Upon arriving at the airport entrance, Pan Yue showed no signs of anything amiss.
"Have a safe journey." Pan Yue unloaded his luggage, his tone as usual, as if seeing off a good friend as they left this land.
“…Thank you.” Zhu Shiyi took the luggage and pursed her lips.
So... he's not planning to confess his feelings?
Did he not hear what she said yesterday?
He didn't seem to dislike her.
Zhu Shiyi was unsure. She hesitated for a moment, then tentatively asked, "School starts in two weeks, can you come pick me up?"
Pan Yue nodded: "Okay, remember to send me the flight information."
Zhu Shiyi asked somewhat anxiously, "Shall we still video chat tonight?"
"Hmm." Pan Yue replied naturally.
Zhu Shiyi stared at him intently, but couldn't detect anything unusual.
He didn't refuse any of her requests, nor did he want to distance himself from her, so he probably just didn't hear the half-finished confession he gave last night.
The airport announcements repeatedly reminded drivers: "Drivers dropping off passengers, please pass through within five minutes. The entire route is automatically monitored; violators will be fined 200 yuan..."
The airport platform only allows parking for five minutes.
With cars coming and going, Zhu Shiyi didn't have time to dwell on it.
Finally, she opened her arms and tilted her head: "One last hug before you go?"
Pan Yue's expression seemed slightly sluggish.
Zhu Shiyi stepped forward and put his arm around Pan Yue.
......
He slowly raised his arms and wrapped them around her waist.
Zhu Shiyi didn't speak, and neither did Pan Yue. He silently tightened his grip, lowered his head, and gently rested his chin on her shoulder.
......
"Alright," Zhu Shiyi said with a smile, gently pulling away. "Let's go, or our wallets will be in trouble."
Pan Yue paused for a moment with his raised arm, then slowly lowered it: "Okay."
"I'm off," Zhu Shiyi said, pulling her suitcase and winking at Pan Yue. She added a subtle hint, "Let's play games together when we get back!"
--
Yuecheng.
Zhu Shiyi took the subway and then a bus home. As soon as she entered the door, she smelled the aroma of food filling the house.
"Zhu Shijie, come and greet me!" Zhu Shiyi's first words to her long-lost younger brother were utterly cheeky.
The sixth-grade boy's face immediately lit up with joy. Zhu Shijie, with his big, bright eyes wide open, jumped up and kicked his legs, shouting, "Mom, my sister is back!"
......
At the dinner table, Liu Lu chatted about everyday matters while constantly putting food on Zhu Shiyi's plate. Her daughter had just returned home, and she couldn't hide her joy: "Eat more! You've been working and studying all day; look how haggard you are. Stop talking about dieting; you're so thin, what's the point of dieting?"
The table was full of dishes that Zhu Shiyi loved to eat, and she was overjoyed: "Didn't you always say I was fat in high school? Isn't it good that I'm thinner now? Congratulations!"
Zhu Shiyi experienced a lot of pressure in high school and gained more than 10 kilograms, which made her particularly conscious of her weight during college.
Now things are great. She went home and weighed herself, and thanks to exercise, she no longer needs to watch her diet much, and she's actually lost a whole three pounds!
She went from 105 pounds to 102 pounds, which wasn't a big change in weight, but after weighing herself, she looked in the mirror and her figure seemed much slimmer and more shapely.
This is truly a joyous occasion!
Liu Lu denied it: "When did I ever say that you've always been very thin?"
Zhu Shiyi said "Oh," and changed the subject: "Where's Dad?"
It was dinner for the family, but only the father was absent.
Zhu Shijie probably wanted to get noticed, so he answered in a muffled voice, "He's on a business trip and won't be back until New Year's Eve. My dad said he'll go back to our hometown on New Year's Eve and drive there to save on highway tolls."
Zhu Shiyi pursed his lips and responded.
This hometown, of course, is the hometown of my father, Zhu Zhenggang.
Liu Lu married from another province. Decades ago, she heard that the salary in Yuecheng was tens of yuan higher than in her hometown, so she went to Yuecheng to work. Zhu Zhenggang is from a fifth-tier city in the province. He was born in a small village and worked hard to get to Yuecheng and successfully settle down in a first-tier city.
With airfares expensive during the Spring Festival, Liu Lu, with her family of four, was always reluctant to go back to her parents' home.
In Zhu Shiyi's memory, she returned to her mother's hometown very few times, at most two or three times.
Zhu Shiyi's parents married and had children late in life, making her the youngest among her peers. She had nothing in common with her relatives, so when she returned to her hometown, she had no playmates and found it very boring.
After dinner, Zhu Shiyi returned to his room and discovered the information that Pan Yue had been concerned about.
Having just met with her family, she completely forgot about Pan Yue. She quickly let them know she was safe and invited him to play games together that evening.
Pan Yue: [I've been a bit busy lately, so I probably won't be able to play.]
Zhu Shiyi: [Aren't you going home for Chinese New Year?]
Pan Yue: [Reply.]
Zhu Shiyi: [Then let's play again during the New Year.]
Pan Yue: [Okay.]
Zhu Shiyi was itching to watch, so he immediately clicked on the video.
About ten seconds later, the other party answered.
Pan Yue, wearing glasses, sat at his desk, still working.
Seeing this, Zhu Shiyi didn't want to disturb him.
About half an hour later, Pan Yue said he had to go to a meeting and had to hang up.
--
Jinrong, a restaurant and bar.
With the Spring Festival approaching, bars are decorated with lanterns and colorful decorations, exuding a romantic and festive atmosphere.
"What?!" Lin Changren lost his grip, and the wine glass slammed onto the table with a bang. "Shiyi confessed to you!"
“…” Pan Yue took another swig of wine. “She didn’t finish speaking.”
His expression was somber, a stark contrast to the cheerful atmosphere around him.
"We've come this far, what difference does it make whether we've finished speaking or not?" Lin Changren pressed impatiently, "Why won't you agree?"
Pan Yue closed his eyes and took a deep breath.
He certainly wanted to agree.
“Last night,” Pan Yue lowered his eyes, “did you hear what Qin Yu and Meng Xiaolan said to her?”
Lin Changren shook his head: "I was talking to my girlfriend and didn't notice."
Trying his best to suppress his frustrations, Pan Yue raised his head and took another swig of wine.
"She is from Yuecheng."
Lin Changren frowned, not understanding: "...And then?"
"She's just studying in Jinrong. After she graduates, she'll eventually have to go back to Yuecheng."
Lin Changren retorted loudly, "Who said she would definitely come back...?"
The sounds in the air gradually faded, and silence slowly descended.
“…Brother, think positively,” Lin Changren patted Pan Yue. “Our Jinrong has a lot of delicious food, a long history, and a rich cultural heritage. It’s also a key development area in the southwest. It’s not that bad. Maybe Shiyi will be willing to stay for you?”
Pan Yue glanced at Lin Changren, twitched his lips, and secretly shook his head.
Everyone knows that Yuecheng is a first-tier city, much more developed than Jinrong.
"Yuecheng has a bright future ahead of her." Pan Yue poured himself a full glass of wine, filling it to the brim.
Lin Changren sighed and clinked glasses with Pan Yue: "You have to cherish the present and enjoy the process. Don't worry about the outcome in advance. Why think so much? Maybe a solution will come out as we talk."
Pan Yue: ......
He swallowed the wine to relieve his sorrow, but it did not dispel even a trace of his melancholy.
"There are still many things to do."
Long-distance relationships are already difficult enough.
But Pan Yue's decision was not limited to the issue of living in a different place.
Lin Changren asked, "Anything else?"
"family."
......
There was something that Zhu Shiyi didn't ask, and Pan Yue didn't mention either.
He, Pan Yue, wasn't even from Chengdu.
His home is in Hanshan, a small town on the border of Jinrong.
His family was not well-off.
Despite his seemingly glamorous life—he started his own business, was a boss, drove luxury cars, and appeared to be very wealthy.
But he only runs a small company. Although the industry is currently doing well due to the overall economic climate, allowing the company to make a profit every year, he doesn't know how long this stable situation can last.
Moreover, the company's largest investor was Lin Changren's father.
Pan Yue wasn't even a shareholder before; he was just a manager hired by the board of directors and received a salary as the general manager.
He only became a shareholder of the company in the middle of last year by investing his management skills and a certain amount of capital, thus gaining stable dividends.
However, this means that he has even less liquid capital on hand.
Pan Yue took a swig of his drink: "I can't give her a better life."
Sometimes, Zhu Shiyi would share some things about her family with him.
Her father owns his own studio and lives in the suburbs of Yuecheng, which is developing rapidly. She has a younger brother, and each of them has their own room, meaning that her family has at least a three-bedroom house.
Roughly calculated, Zhu Shiyi's family's stable assets are at least eight million.
...nearly three times more than what he had on hand.
"Don't be like that," Lin Changren comforted him, "We're still far from retirement, we can still make money."
“The future is something we can’t control,” Pan Yue’s fists clenched involuntarily, he was deeply conflicted. “What if I can’t make money? Why should I let her travel thousands of miles to gamble her best years on a man who isn’t even that well-off?”
Lin Changren retorted: "You're so young, yet you have assets exceeding one million. What's wrong with your circumstances?"
“…Good and bad are relative,” Pan Yue said, slamming his clenched fist on the table. He took a deep breath. “With her qualifications, she could find a suitable family in Yuecheng.”
......
Pan Yue suddenly couldn't continue speaking.
He swallowed hard and said casually, "She doesn't need someone like me."
How do you know if someone needs it or not?
"In two years, after she graduates and starts thinking about the future, she will realize that I am not a good choice for her."
Pan Yue closed his eyes tightly and took another sip of wine.
"She won't need me." He repeated himself, seemingly speaking to someone else.
Countless images flashed through my mind. I imagined Zhu Shiyi, in the future, also holding hands with other women, smiling radiantly at other men...
He didn't want to think about it, and he dared not think about it.
"Love is not about material things," Lin Changren advised.
Pan Yue smiled and said, "But what aspect of life doesn't require material things?"
Money can't buy happiness, but you can't be happy without money.
not to mention.
“Even if we disregard so-called job opportunities.” Pan Yue raised his glass, gulped down two mouthfuls, and drank most of the glass in one go. His vision finally became a little blurry.
"Her home is in Yuecheng."
"She has parents, relatives, and friends."
......
How could he feel at ease letting her leave her hometown and give up her promising future just to be with him?
"...Have a drink." Lin Changren didn't know what to say for a moment, so he silently ordered another bottle of wine.
......
“Changzi,” Pan Yue felt as if he were drunk, his eyes involuntarily reddening as he grabbed Lin Changren’s arm, “She shouldn’t have come to Jinrong with me. She was born in the most developed city and received the best education.”
Zhu Shiyi possesses a certain magic—a natural, effortless ability. It's a quality that big-city kids are born with.
“In the future, her children should also have these best things, just like her.”
Her children should also be born in the best city, receive the best high-quality education, experience the most enlightened cultural influence, and live as confident and dazzling people as she is.
That was the girl he loved.
He should let her climb even higher mountains.
“She’ll figure it out someday,” Pan Yue said, his fingers clenching involuntarily. “In Yuecheng, as long as she has a stable job and is with someone… who is in a better position.”
The more I talk, the more stuffy my chest feels.
Pan Yue swallowed hard, forcing back the bitterness in his eyes: "If she finds a local, she can go home anytime. She'll be happier than if she's with me."
Lin Changren frowned.
He pried Pan Yue's hand away: "Have you ever thought that what this girl cares about is you as a person, not where you're from, not social status, and certainly not your future children?"
"Yes, material things are important, but are you penniless? Are you a homeless person or a loser? If you work hard together with her, can't you live a better life?"
"Then you say—" Pan Yue's voice grew heavier as the alcohol took effect.
......
He quickly calmed down and twisted his reddened neck: "Can MEETING open a branch in Yuecheng?"
......
Lin Changren pursed his lips.
Pan Yue must have been drunk.
Although Yuecheng is a first-tier city with strong purchasing power, the fast pace of life and year-round summer climate make the outdoor camping market sluggish. The campsites they opened in Yuecheng are indoor camping-themed shops, which, while able to stay afloat, don't significantly contribute to building their campsite brand.
Jinrong, due to its unique urban culture, has residents who love eating, drinking, and having fun. On weekends, Jinrong residents go shopping, visit trendy shops, or at the very least, go to the park to soak up the sun, making it a popular camping destination.
Even putting all that aside, MEETING originated in Jinrong, and most of the company's campsites are located in Jinrong and its surrounding provinces. Changing the regional development strategy is not something that can be done overnight, and it is likely to fail.
Pan Yue was a thoughtful man; there was no way he couldn't have misunderstood these things.
Therefore, their conversation never considered this aspect from the very beginning.
Lin Changren filled Pan Yue's cup with wine.
“Old Pan,” he said, “I understand you, brother. But I think you understand this without me having to say it.”
......
A slight bitterness rose at the corner of his mouth.
Pan Yue drank what was probably the umpteenth cup of wine he had drunk that night.
“I can’t give up my career in Jinrong. So why should I ask her to give up everything in Yuecheng for me?”
“I understand,” Lin Changren said, “but you can’t make the decision for Shi Yi. Maybe she just likes you and is willing to be with you?”
“Yes, she’s young, impulsive, and dares to say and agree to anything,” Pan Yue shook his head. “But what about later? She’s not stupid, she’s very smart. Once the impulsiveness fades, she’ll consider reality. And what about her parents? Will they agree? What will they think?”
Lin Changren was speechless.
“...I’m six years older than her, and I should have taken on more responsibility in this relationship,” said the adult man, his sorrows unspoken. If not for the alcohol, perhaps Pan Yue would not have been able to express his true feelings. “These are things I should have considered long ago, but I didn’t think about anything.”
...and so he let himself go.
It was his fault.
Pan Yue felt somewhat powerless.
He blamed himself for not thinking about these things sooner.
His family background was average, and his success today is inseparable from rationality and careful consideration.
In his work, he has always been prudent. He relies on research for any decision, analyzes data from every marketing campaign, and has a thorough understanding of every requirement, every situation, and every project. He has never made a decision on a whim.
This is what he does best.
But what about facing Zhu Shiyi?
......
Despite his inherent rationality and comfort zone of weighing options, he unknowingly allowed himself to indulge in self-destructive behavior, never once considering the realities of life.
These things didn't just happen yesterday; the chasm between them has existed since the very first day they met.
He should have thought of that sooner.
......
He was too greedy.
He shouldn't have dragged her into this.
......
“I still think you’re overthinking it,” Lin Changren punched Pan Yue. “Sometimes feelings are just a matter of a moment’s impulse, like when your mother hits you, without any reason.”
"Ask yourself honestly, don't you like her?"
Pan Yue remained silent.
......
"like."
Lin Changren raised his glass: "Then let's make a brew first."
Pan Yue chuckled.
He didn't say anything more, just shook his head and downed a whole glass of wine.
Zhu Shiyi once asked him what happiness is.
In fact, everyone's definition of happiness, broadly speaking, should be pretty much the same—it's about living the life you want.
How to live the life you want?
Without a doubt.
The most important thing—money.
How to make money?
Past successes have taught Pan Yue that he should use rational analysis to control the situation.
Rational thinking is the fundamental difference between humans and animals.
Only by remaining rational and taking control of the situation through careful consideration can one achieve success in their career, thereby acquiring wealth and living the life they desire.
Zhu Shiyi in the past was not rational either.
She is sensitive, conflicted, and prone to internal strife; she is hesitant and timid when faced with others' clamor.
But she has changed. At work, she is meticulous, analyzing every project with extreme care; in life, she is unafraid of others' opinions and dares to fight back.
She gets better and better because of her rationality.
Many people are becoming happier because of their rationality.
......
Sorrow comes in cups, one after another.
Another bottle of whiskey is empty.
Lin Changren asked, "Aren't you in pain if you give her up?"
Of course it's painful.
but.
"Pain is relative." Pan Yue had already answered this question. He even used similar words to enlighten Zhu Shiyi when they first met.
"When faced with two painful things, the less painful one is happiness."
The pain of every event can be quantified;
The quantitative standard should not depend on the current level of heartache, but should be considered in the context of their entire lives.
Just as his dietary restrictions and exercise regimens cause him pain in the present moment, he possesses a healthy body and stable emotions, which are blessings in the long run.
Zhu Shiyi understood this principle.
She abandoned laziness and took action, and although she sometimes hated what she was doing, she never gave up.
A short, sharp pain is worse than a long, drawn-out one.
Both she and he understood—
Immediate pain represents delayed gratification.
He cannot indulge himself.
For her and his true happiness, he cannot be willful.
......
As he sobered up a bit, Pan Yue calmed down.
He realized that their relationship was also a prisoner's dilemma.
Because no one can predict what the future holds.
In this relationship, neither of them knew whether the other truly needed them, nor were they certain whether they would choose to cooperate or betray each other; they were both afraid that if one cooperated and the other betrayed, whoever chose to cooperate would suffer the loss.
As "rational people," no one wants to be the one who suffers losses by foolishly cooperating.
In this predicament, it is certainly more advantageous for the prisoner to choose betrayal than cooperation.
As a result, the weighing of the options inevitably leads to betrayal by both sides.
......
A seed was planted in Pan Yue's heart and began to sprout—
He is willing to choose cooperation.
But what about Zhu Shiyi?
What about the future Zhu Shiyi?
For Zhu Shiyi in the future, the best choice is betrayal.
Given her circumstances, she doesn't need him.
The other party's choice has been determined, and the Nash equilibrium condition has emerged.
Therefore, the solution to this game is already known.
As a rational person, he must give up and choose betrayal in order to maximize his personal interests.
Nash equilibrium has been recognized by the Nobel Prize in Economics.
This is the best possible outcome of this struggle, and it's also the lesson he once personally told Zhu Shiyi.
......
"Changzi," Pan Yue said, exhausted, "do you have any cigarettes?"
Lin Changren glanced at him, his eyes filled with complex emotions.
He got up and headed towards the lounge: "...I'll ask Neil."
Pan Yue responded sullenly.
Everything that is rationally weighed is in line with theory and science.
This is his consistent way of thinking.
......
For a moment, my heart clenched violently, a tearing pain shooting through me.
Pulling at his chest, Pan Yue took another swig of wine.
"Changzi," he suddenly called out to Lin Changren, "no need."
Lin Changren stopped in his tracks: "...Not smoking anymore?"
"Um."
......
He quit gaming and smoking.
Withdrawal is always difficult.
But he always succeeded.
Her addiction;
He can quit too.
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