28. Throw it away directly
2:17 a.m.
He Miao was awakened by a vague unease. It wasn't a sound, but a kind of biological clock-like intuition, like a mother animal sensing movement in her nest. She opened her eyes; the bedroom was dark, with only the faint sound of the humidifier. He Tian was fast asleep beside her, breathing evenly.
Her heart sank.
I rushed over and flung open the door. Inside, the little girl was curled up in bed, her back to the door, but the edge of the blanket clearly reflected a rectangular, glaring screen light and the shadow of fingers rapidly swiping.
"Get out!"
He Miao's voice was like a thunderclap in the quiet of the night. She rushed over and yanked off the covers.
Gun Gun jumped up in fright, and the iPad he was holding tightly fell onto the bed with a "thud." The screen was still lit up; it was a brightly colored parkour game where the little character was jumping around happily.
Time seemed to freeze for a few seconds.
Immediately, a surge of energy, a mixture of shock, anger, the sting of being deceived, and a deeper fear, shot from He Miao's feet to the top of her head with a "boom." She felt her temples throbbing, blood rushing to her cheeks, and her fingertips going numb.
"You..." Her voice was distorted with extreme anger, "What are you doing?!"
Gun Gun's face turned deathly pale, his eyes wide open, filled with terror and bewilderment at being caught red-handed. He instinctively hid his hands behind his back, even though the iPad was right there, blatantly visible.
"I...I can't sleep..." he stammered, his voice barely audible.
"Can't sleep, so you secretly play on the iPad?!" He Miao's voice was completely out of control, shrill and frightening. "Who told you to take it out?! When did you take it out?! Huh?! Speak!" She grabbed the still-warm iPad and held it up in front of Gun Gun's eyes. The screen light reflected her face, which was contorted with anger. "Games! Games again! He Tian! Get up! Look at your son!"
Her final scream shattered the tranquility of the night. He Tian, shuffling in his slippers, appeared sleepily in the doorway, his glasses askew. "What's wrong? In the middle of the night..."
"What's wrong?!" He Miao practically poked the iPad at his nose. "Your son! Staying up all night! Stealing the iPad and playing games under the covers! Look at him! Look at his audacity!"
He Tian rubbed his eyes, took the iPad, glanced at the screen, then at Gun Gun, who was trembling with fear and tears welling in her eyes. His face didn't show the fury He Miao had expected. He even sighed almost imperceptibly.
This reaction is tantamount to adding fuel to the fire.
"Is this your attitude?!" He Miao was practically going crazy with anger. "He's cheating! He's addicted! It's a character issue! If he dares to sneak a game on the iPad today, he'll dare to steal money to go to an internet cafe tomorrow! 'He who steals a needle when young will steal gold when old!' Haven't you heard that saying?! Aren't you going to do anything about it? If you don't do anything about it, I'll..."
"Miaomiao." He Tian interrupted her excited words, his voice not loud, but with a strange calmness. He put the iPad on the bedside table, walked to the bedside, and without looking at He Miao, squatted down and looked at his son, who was huddled in the corner of the bed, trembling.
“Gun Gun,” his voice was calm, even gentle, “tell Daddy why you can’t sleep?”
Tears streamed down her face as she sobbed, too afraid to speak, her eyes darting between her furious mother and her calm father in terror.
"Did you have a bad dream, or is something on your mind?" He Tian continued to ask, his patience making He Miao feel unbelievable.
"...Homework...There's a question in my homework that I don't know how to do...The teacher will check it tomorrow..." Gun Gun finally managed to utter a few words, her sobs growing louder, "I've thought about it for so long...I still don't know how...I'm so anxious...I just...I just..."
"You just want to play some games to distract yourself, or maybe just not think about it at all, right?" He Tian finished for him.
Gun Gun nodded vigorously, sobbing uncontrollably, "Mommy...Mommy, I was wrong...I shouldn't have taken the iPad...I shouldn't have played with it secretly...Don't be angry...I won't do it again next time..."
He Miao's anger was still burning, but seeing her son crying like this, and hearing that it was because of homework problems, a mixed feeling of heartache and... vague helplessness crept into that pure anger. The terrible associations of "stealing," "addiction," and "moral depravity" that she had just had seemed somewhat...excessive compared to her son's simple statement, "I don't know how to do my homework, I'm anxious."
He Tian took a tissue and handed it to Gun Gun to wipe his face, then said, "If you don't know how to do your homework, you can ask the teacher tomorrow, or you can ask Dad now. Playing games won't solve your homework problem, right?"
"Hmm..." Gun Gun responded softly.
"Besides, we agreed that the iPad can't be brought into the bedroom and must be handed over before going to bed, right?"
"right……"
"So, what should we do now that you've broken your promise today?"
Gun Gun lowered its head, its voice even softer: "...Apologize. Accept the punishment."
"Okay." He Tian nodded. "Apologize first."
Gun Gun turned to He Miao, her eyes red from crying, her little mouth pouting, "Mommy, I'm sorry, I shouldn't have secretly taken the iPad to play, I shouldn't have broken the promise... Please don't be angry..."
He Miao stood there, watching her son's pitiful apologetic expression, then observing He Tian's smooth and efficient "handling process." The anger inside her felt like it was being stifled by a damp cloth, hissing and smoldering, unable to erupt. After a long pause, she finally said stiffly, "Is an apology enough? Punishment! A punishment is necessary! All your allowance for this month will be deducted! No going to the amusement park this weekend!"
“Okay.” He Tian surprisingly agreed, but then he said to Gun Gun, “However, the punishment is because you violated the ‘rules of use.’ As for homework not causing anxiety and then wanting to escape through games, that’s another issue. What we need to address is how to deal with difficulties in the future, not simply banning games. Games are not a monster; they are not inherently wrong. What’s wrong is playing them at the wrong time and in the wrong way. Understand?”
Gun Gun seemed to understand, but still nodded.
“Now,” He Tian stood up, “do you want to talk to Dad about that problem you can’t solve now, or go to sleep first and talk about it when you get up early tomorrow?”
"Now... now let's talk about it," Gun Gun said softly, stealing a glance at his mother, whose face was still pale.
He Tian picked up Gun Gun's schoolbag, found his math workbook, and, by the bedside lamp, began to explain the problems to him. His voice was steady, his thoughts clear, and he used the simplest analogies to explain the difficulties of carrying and borrowing. Gun Gun gradually stopped crying, and his attention was drawn to him.
He Miao stood there, like an abrupt intruder, watching the father and son at the bedside in the dead of night, one teaching and the other learning, and the atmosphere gradually calmed down. All the rebukes, warnings, and terrible imaginings of their future depravity that she felt were now stuck in her chest, unable to be uttered or swallowed.
A deeper weariness replaced the anger and swept over her.
She silently left the room, gently closing the door behind her. The corridor was dark and silent, save for the heavy, erratic beating of her own heart.
She walked to the living room and slumped onto the sofa. In the darkness, the scene from just moments ago replayed in her mind. Her outburst, He Tian's calm; her "exaggeration," He Tian's "addressing the issue at hand"; her projected fear, He Tian's targeted solution…
Was she really overreacting? Was He Tian's seemingly "indifferent" approach the right one?
About twenty minutes later, He Tian came out of the children's room. He walked to the living room, turned on a small lamp, and the dim light illuminated his expressionless face.
"Asleep?" He Miao asked in a hoarse voice.
"Okay, the question was explained clearly, I'm not panicking anymore, and I fell asleep quickly." He Tian sat down next to her, was silent for a while, and then said, "Miao Miao, what you did just now... was too scary."
"I'm scary?" He Miao's temper flared up again. "He secretly plays on his iPad in the middle of the night, and I can't even get angry?"
“It’s okay to be angry. But how much of your anger is directed at ‘him breaking the rules,’ and how much is… your own fear?” He Tian turned his head, his eyes behind his glasses looking at her, his gaze calm yet direct.
"I'm afraid? What am I afraid of?"
“You’re afraid he’ll go astray, afraid he’ll become addicted, afraid he’ll escape your control, afraid of your failure as a mother,” He Tian pointed out incisively. “You’ve directly equated ‘playing a game once’ with ‘becoming a criminal in the future.’ This isn’t educating him; it’s venting your own anxiety.”
He Miao opened her mouth, wanting to refute, but found herself unable to. He Tian's words were like a mirror, reflecting the core of her anger that she herself hadn't clearly realized.
"I...I'm doing this for his own good!" she could only weakly insist at the end.
“I know.” He Tian nodded, his tone softening. “Of course you mean well. You’ve sacrificed so much for him, worried about everything, and you want to protect him well, I know that. But sometimes, overprotection, or protecting him in the wrong way, can make him afraid to try, afraid to make mistakes, or… learn to hide and deceive, just like tonight.”
He paused, as if carefully choosing his words: "Educating a child is a bit like debugging a complex open-world game. You can't set a single, unavoidable main quest for him, and then declare him a 'game failure' if he gets distracted, encounters a side quest, or a monster. You have to give him a safe world framework (rules), and then allow him to explore it, allow him to make some minor mistakes (like using the wrong equipment or taking the wrong path), and even allow him to occasionally get stuck on a level (a difficult homework problem). Your role is not that of a 'player' controlling every step he takes, but rather a 'system' that designs this world and provides strategies and assistance when necessary."
"Trust is more effective at helping him grow than supervision. Guidance after a mistake is more effective at helping him remember the rules than thunderous anger when a mistake is made," He Tian concluded, his tone still straightforward, which left He Miao in a long silence.
She suddenly remembered the oppressive atmosphere in Yi Yi's family, and the power struggle between Ding Xiaojuan and Gao Sheng. Every family has its own problems, and every pair of parents is figuring things out in their own way. As for her, perhaps she had been trying too hard to play the role of a "perfect" mother and family manager, treating every sign of "imperfection" as a virus that needed to be eradicated immediately.
He Tian's approach may seem passive, simple, and even a bit "careless," but perhaps it is a deeper kind of "governing by doing nothing" based on understanding and trust.
"So...you think I'm wrong?" she asked in a low voice, this time genuinely asking, not questioning.
“There’s no right or wrong.” He Tian shook his head. “It’s just a difference in approach. You’re emotional and protective. I’m… logical. We can complement each other. But next time, maybe you could try asking ‘why’ before you get angry. Just like debugging a program, you have to find the line of code that’s causing the error first, instead of just smashing the computer.”
He Miao leaned back on the sofa, staring at the ceiling. In the living room late at night, only the two of them were there. A conflict that could have escalated into a family storm was thus deflated by He Tian's unique, almost "programmed" calmness.
She felt a deep weariness, but also a strange sense of relief.
Perhaps she really could try to loosen the reins she was holding so tightly a little. She should trust that the man she chose has the wisdom to love and guide their child.
They also believe that their children have the power to grow and thrive on their own, guided by love and rules.
The night grew deeper. The faint sound of cars passing by could be heard in the distance. Life was still a mess, but at least tonight, the mess didn't escalate into an uncontrollable catfight.
This is perhaps the small but real victory in ordinary days.
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