Four years of dreams, a joyous day
Four years passed like sand slipping through fingers, silently. Xu Yanchi's name gradually faded from people's daily conversations, only stirring up a distant sense of melancholy on a rainy night or in a fleeting moment when it was mentioned by chance.
Xue Su became a middle school Chinese teacher, standing on the podium every day, sharing the gentleness and power of poetry with her students. On weekend afternoons, she would linger in her own "Yanshan Dessert Shop," the aroma of butter and caramel wafting from the oven. Occasionally, she would glance out the window, a fleeting, almost imperceptible softness in her eyes. When students curiously asked her, "Why doesn't the teacher have a boyfriend?" she would always smile and shake her head, her fingertips lightly brushing against the rose-patterned placemat on the table—a custom-made one, strikingly similar to the kind Xu Yanchi had once admired.
Wang Zhitao had long since gone abroad, establishing himself in the business world through sheer tenacity, and is now a well-known entrepreneur in China. This spring, he posted wedding photos on his WeChat Moments. In the photos, he held his bride's hand, his smile radiant, a far cry from his youthful naiveté. The bride was beautiful, with fair skin, her features somewhat resembling Xu Yanchi's; she was like a spring pond, and standing with Wang Zhitao, they became the most beautiful scenery under the setting sun. The comment section was full of blessings. Chen Ningyi's fingers paused—she and Wang Zhitao were classmates in high school, but due to various events in high school, they lost contact. In the end, she only typed "Happy marriage, may your future be bright," sent it, and scrolled away without looking at it again.
Chen Ningyi herself donned a crisp lawyer's robe, displaying clear logic and sharp wit in court, becoming a well-known up-and-coming lawyer in the industry. Her life was filled with cases and social engagements. Occasionally, she would meet with Xiao Fuzhou for family or work, and they would chat about funny things from high school—such as how she stayed up all night studying for a competition and was caught by the teacher eating snacks in the classroom, or how Xiao Fuzhou once helped a classmate from the next class fix a malfunctioning projector. However, whenever the topic was about to touch on Xu Yanchi, the two would tacitly change the subject, and the air would instantly be filled with an awkward silence.
Only Xiao Fuzhou seemed trapped in time four years ago. He took over the company left by his father and expanded the business with precise decisions, becoming a promising young entrepreneur in the eyes of outsiders. But only he knew that the corner of his heart that was about Xu Yanchi had never seen a glimmer of light.
That evening, as soon as Xiao Fuzhou returned home, he heard his grandmother Li Nianci's voice coming from the living room. Her tone was firm and unyielding: "You're 22 this year. When are you going to book the wedding banquet with Xiaoyi? We can't keep putting it off!"
Xiao Fuzhou unbuttoned his suit jacket, his face darkening. "Grandma, Chen Ningyi and I haven't even confirmed our relationship yet, so what's the point of talking about marriage? Besides, I don't like her, and I can make my own decisions."
"You're making the decision?" Li Nianci stood up abruptly, her cane slamming heavily on the floor. "How many more years can I wait for you? Are you still thinking about that Xu Yanchi? A sickly man I can't afford to raise, he won't even rest in peace after he dies!" She took a breath, her tone becoming resolute again. "In these next few months, I'll contact Xiaoyi's parents and try to get the engagement finalized this year!" She added a warning at the end, "Xiaoyi is a good girl. I've watched you both grow up. Getting married sooner will put my mind at ease. If you don't get married soon, I won't be able to see you anymore!"
Xiao Fuzhou's hands, hanging by his sides, suddenly clenched, his knuckles turning white, his brows furrowing in distress. But under his grandmother's watchful gaze, he ultimately refrained from further rebuttal, suppressing all his resistance into his eyes—a turbulent undercurrent hidden beneath a calm surface, unseen by his grandmother.
Over the next few months, Li Nianci's "scheduling" was so packed it was suffocating. One day, she'd use the excuse that "the mall has new styles suitable for young people" to lure the two of them to her own mall; the next day, she'd say "the newly released movie has good reviews" and book a small theater; the day after, she'd reserve a window seat at a newly opened Michelin-starred restaurant. Each meeting was a carefully arranged private setting, yet Xiao Fuzhou always maintained a half-meter distance from Chen Ningyi, rarely letting his eyes linger while speaking, and occasionally responding with only brief "um" or "okay."
Chen Ningyi watched all this, and each time afterward, she would sigh as she looked at her reflection in the car window. She had liked Xiao Fuzhou since she was 16, a crush hidden in a notebook, tucked into her diary, becoming her most innocent and youthful secret. It remained hidden in the glances exchanged during each "chance" encounter, a secret that had persisted for six years. She had stubbornly believed that Xiao Fuzhou would be hers sooner or later—they were well-matched, and she had her grandmother's support. But now, seeing his deliberate avoidance, she hesitated for the first time: should she continue this six-year-long unrequited love?
The private room was so quiet that you could hear the soft slurry of the cream soup cooling down. Suddenly, Chen Ningyi's voice broke through the silence: "Xiao Fuzhou, do you know? I've liked you for six years."
The light from the crystal chandelier fell on her trembling eyelashes. Xiao Fuzhou suddenly looked up, his knife and fork clattering against the edge of his plate. His eyes were filled with utter astonishment—he had never imagined that these words, hidden for six years, would come crashing down on him in such a direct way. His fingertips unconsciously tightened around the strawberry hair clip in his pocket, the sharp edges of the small plastic strawberry digging painfully into his palm.
“Six years,” Chen Ningyi said, her eyes lowered, her voice soft like a sigh, yet heavy like a soliloquy. “I’ve loved you for six whole years, but you’ve never looked at me, your gaze has never lingered on me for even a second.”
Xiao Fuzhou's Adam's apple bobbed, and he was about to speak when he saw Chen Ningyi's eyes suddenly redden. Large tears fell onto the plate, splattering tiny specks of cream. The veins on her hand, which was gripping the napkin, bulged, and a sob, mixed with grievance, burst forth: "You like Xu Yanchi, I know it! I know everything, Xiao Fuzhou!"
The private room grew even quieter, with only her collapsing voice echoing in the background. "I've never seen you care about anyone so much," her voice suddenly rose, tears streaming down her face, "To be honest, I'm jealous of her! I hate that she's beautiful, that so many people like her, and that she gets better grades than me! And what about me? I'm like a bug in a doghouse, except for my background, I'm worthless compared to her!"
She stared intently at Xiao Fuzhou, tears blurring her vision, yet her voice still held a stubborn question: "Do you think so too? If it weren't for my background, would I be nothing in your eyes?!"
The last sentence was almost shouted, making the air tremble. Xiao Fuzhou looked at her red eyes, the strawberry hair clip in his pocket hurting his palm, and the word "no" was stuck in his throat, unable to be uttered.
Xiao Fuzhou remained silent for a long time before finally saying in a hoarse voice, "Excuse me, I must leave." Before he finished speaking, he got up and hurriedly left the restaurant, leaving Chen Ningyi alone in the private room. Her shoulders trembled, and her sobs gradually drowned out the silence of the room.
Months later, under the daily urging of Grandma Li Nianci, the engagement date was finally set. Xiao Fuzhou resisted and argued, but when he heard his parents' red-eyed advice, "Just think of it as a matter of the family, and forget about Xu Yanchi?"
Forget it? But... how could I possibly forget it?
He finally relented. On the day she tried on her wedding dress, Chen Ningyi stood in front of the mirror in a mermaid wedding gown, adorned with pearls and rhinestones, but she didn't smile. She simply looked quietly at Xiao Fuzhou's cold and hard profile in the mirror.
"Mr. Xiao, Ms. Chen, this dress and wedding gown are a perfect match. You'll definitely be the most stunning lady at the wedding." Amidst the receptionist's compliments, Xiao Fuzhou's fingertips twirled the strawberry hair clip in his pocket, remaining silent. Chen Ningyi suddenly turned around, her eyes red-rimmed: "You don't need to force yourself to smile. I know you don't want to marry me."
Xiao Fuzhou's Adam's apple bobbed, and he was about to speak when she turned her face away first: "But the marriage still has to take place. I... don't want to wait any longer."
On the wedding day, red ribbons adorned the hall, and the hall was filled with guests. Xiao Fuzhou, dressed in a sharp suit, watched Chen Ningyi walk in hand-in-hand with her father. The train of her wedding dress swept across the red carpet like a silent cloud. When they exchanged rings, his fingertips touched her hand; it was cold and trembling slightly. The pastor asked, "Do you take this person as yours?" Chen Ningyi spoke first, her voice soft yet clear: "I do."
Looking at the calmness in her eyes, and recalling Xu Yanchi's smile with the strawberry hair clip in her hair back then, Xiao Fuzhou's Adam's apple bobbed for a long time before he finally said, "I do."
After the wedding banquet, only the two of them remained in the bridal chamber. Chen Ningyi sat on the edge of the bed, removed her veil, and watched as Xiao Fuzhou took out the strawberry hair clip from his pocket, gently stroking it with his fingertips. "You still have her things with you," she said softly, not as an accusation, but as a statement.
Xiao Fuzhou looked up and saw no resentment in her eyes, only a trace of weary relief. "Chen Ningyi," he said in a hoarse voice, "I'm sorry."
“No need to apologize.” Chen Ningyi shook her head. “We’re married now, and life goes on. I don’t expect you to forget her, I only hope… that we can each live our own lives peacefully from now on. From now on, we only have a legitimate ‘transactional’ relationship. We have no right to control each other. We will maintain a marital relationship in public, but you cannot interfere with my happiness. You can also pursue your own life.”
Xiao Fuzhou remained silent, his brows furrowed, as if concealing a long-forgotten period of time. Moonlight streamed through the gaps in the curtains, falling between them in a hushed silence where they could hear each other's breathing. He paused, then said in a hoarse voice, "Okay, I agree."
Chen Ningyi looked at his reddened eyes and said nothing more. She simply pulled up the blanket, leaving half of the bed clear. The prelude to their marriage thus slowly began in silence and in their own thoughts—there was no passionate love, but rather the restraint and compromise of adults, like a cup of lukewarm water, slowly flowing through the years.
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