Lu Zhiyuan was amused by me and looked at me helplessly.
I admit that when I first saw Lu Zhiyuan, I was completely infatuated with him.
I have seen quite a few handsome guys and I also have my favorite celebrities and idols, but when I met Lu Zhiyuan, he gave me the impression of being pure and innocent, which inexplicably attracted me.
But this man happened to be very ambitious in his career. As I got to know him better, I saw his focus and responsibility in his work.
I couldn't help but fall into memories.
"The more I get to know you, the more I wonder how a man can have so many shining points. It seems like I already liked you before you pursued me."
Hearing what I said, Lu Zhiyuan raised the corner of his mouth with a hint of pride.
"Then you took the initiative to pursue me. You would send me flowers, help me solve problems, arrange my three meals a day, and accompany me when I was sad. It seemed like you could always catch me when I needed you most."
I think back to those days and can't help but sigh: "From then until we got married, I felt like the happiest woman in the world."
When I mentioned these past events, Lu Zhiyuan looked quite emotional.
I know he misses that time too.
Suddenly thinking of what happened later, I slowly exhaled.
"Until Yuan Yaxin showed up, it seemed like this happiness was shattered."
Although it was an experience I didn't want to recall, now that I really talk about it, I seem to feel a lot more at ease.
I said in a relaxed tone, "I'm starting to doubt you. I even suspect you're having an affair with my sister."
I laughed at myself. "At that time, I felt like I was betrayed by the whole world. My sister and my husband, the only two people in the world who loved me, betrayed me. At that time, I was helpless, sad, and angry. Later, various signs made me believe that you were really together with Yuan Yaxin. I wanted to make your affairs public and destroy you."
During that time, I was indeed a little paranoid.
She was obsessed with getting evidence of Lu Zhiyuan's infidelity, filing for divorce, kicking him out of the house, and ruining Yuan Yaxin's reputation.
Looking back now, it was like the crazy revenge of a love-sick brain.
"It wasn't until after the divorce that I thought I could let it go, but I still couldn't. I still couldn't help but think of you, what we went through, and the child I lost..."
When mentioning children, Lu Zhiyuan's eyes flickered.
That was a regret he and I shared, that we couldn't bring that child into this world healthy and well.
Lu Zhiyuan pursed his lips tightly, his eyes revealing guilt towards me, but I no longer blame him.
I just couldn't figure it out at the time.
"In fact, even after many misunderstandings were resolved, I still felt a distance from you in my heart. Because I was afraid. I was afraid that once I let down my guard, the love I subconsciously felt for you would surge in like a tide, and I would be unable to control it."
"That's when I realized I really loved you. Even though I'd been hurt, even though I'd been hysterical before, as long as you explained everything clearly and stood in front of me, I couldn't help but want to walk towards you."
"Xiao Shan..." Lu Zhiyuan's voice choked, his eyes bloodshot.
I laughed at myself and said, "But I don't dare. I'm afraid I'll lose you again. I'm afraid I'll lose the happiness I long for again."
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