Chapter 288
Someone had delivered a few bags of readers' mail the other day, and the oldest was actually two or three months old. She knew that everything he gave her must have been reviewed by him beforehand, otherwise how could there be so much praise and no criticism? Once a work becomes famous, no matter how good it is, it will inevitably be criticized.
He received bags of letters from readers. He would steam the envelopes open and then seal the ones he could show her. He was also worried that she was pregnant and some people's words were so hateful and unpleasant that it would be bad for her to have a miscarriage.
Now is the perfect time for her to start working and stop daydreaming.
Her novels were still being published, but she had been busy giving birth, recuperating after childbirth, and moving back here for the past two months, so she hadn't paid any attention to the reputation of the novels.
The little girl said to her excitedly: "Now, in the whole of Shanghai, your novel is the most popular." While speaking, she clasped her hands together in front of her chest intoxicatedly.
This little girl is nineteen years old, about the same age as her, and she speaks in an interesting way.
Because Wang Jiazhi lived far from home and in semi-isolation, she had no idea she would become so famous. Many readers went to the magazine office asking for her address and photos. Many readers also wrote in, hoping for autographed photos. In those days, the pursuit of celebrity in the literary and art world was no less intense than that of movie stars.
Under normal circumstances, if a work is very popular, the newspaper will publish the author's photo, but of course her photo cannot be published.
Wang Jiazhi still had some confidence in herself, but she felt she wouldn't have reached this point without his help. She'd submitted articles before, and while rejections were fine, she'd also been plagued by self-righteous criticism from editors, which was truly infuriating. Some articles made sense, of course, but some she found completely baseless. She was determined to keep writing her own work, regardless of what others might say.
But after so many setbacks, she still had some doubts about her own abilities. This time, she handed the manuscript to him, knowing that he would help her publish a few that he thought were good. He was her confidant in writing, and he wasn't just trying to please her; he truly understood what she wrote.
But she never expected that he would be so bold as to publish it all and even deliberately ask for two pages to be opened. She was terrified at the time.
She was delighted by her writing success and regained a lot of confidence. But she also thought, with so many talented people, there were many who were overlooked. If she continued to encounter editors who didn't like her style, who knew if anyone would publish her work before she starved to death? Ultimately, she still depended on him.
Wang Jiazhi felt somewhat frustrated. Many onlookers would have thought she had snagged a powerful figure with her youth and beauty, and that she wasn't foolishly seeking money or other such fleeting possessions. Instead, she wanted him to leverage his privileged position to help her achieve celebrity, ensuring a promising future even if she left him. They would have praised her for her cleverness. But few would have believed she truly harbored deep feelings for him.
It was November again, the weather was getting colder, and in a few days it would snow. The water heater was turned on, and the house became even warmer. Wang Jiazhi thought, it's winter again, and she and he will always be through autumn and winter together.
He returned at ten o'clock, and she could smell a faint scent of alcohol on him. It must have been another social engagement she couldn't refuse. Although she'd never been angry about it, he'd always change his clothes after socializing to avoid the scent of makeup. She knew she had to call a police officer when going out for socializing, so she didn't mind. But who knew if that scent of makeup was from a genuine social event, or if he was just hanging out with someone else? It was clear he understood her.
Wang Jiazhi nestled in his arms and said, "It seems like we're always living through autumn and winter."
"Spring and summer will be here in a few months." He believed that he would not die so soon.
Wang Jiazhi thought back to that summer night when they parted ways. That was the beginning of her nightmare.
They'd spent a summer together, but it had been brief, and they'd never developed any real feelings for each other. Back then, he hadn't yet reached the point of irreversible destruction, and she was still innocent. At their best, they'd been nothing more than strangers. Now, they were together, waiting to see who would die first. It was as if they didn't deserve a good life.
"Do you remember? When we first met?"
"Remember."
"Then what am I wearing?" She knew he wouldn't remember, it wasn't like he fell in love with her at first sight.
"A dress with horizontal stripes."
"Hmm! How do you remember?"
"I don't know, I just can still remember it." Actually, it was an occupational disease, but he certainly knew how to say it to make her happy.
She had always remembered him back then. Even before they'd developed a deep connection, she still remembered him. Perhaps Kuang Yumin and the others remembered him, too. Some people spend their entire lives being the center of attention, whether in good times or bad.
She thought, he was already very brilliant when he was her age, no wonder Old Wu was so angry and gnashing his teeth. Looking at herself, life was hard. He didn't have a prominent family background, but he was able to make a career when he was young.
Wang Jiazhi felt that not only her body was imperfect, but her abilities were also pitiful.
Her only chance of success was probably to kill him. Then, they'd completely ignore her. If she lived, they'd continue to capture her and force her to work for free. And if she died, no one would even mention her, like the two who had died before. Old Wu would say it was his own wise guidance and the bravery of Kuang Yumin and the others. It had nothing to do with her anyway. How could they admit to killing their target by relying on a woman sleeping with her?
If anyone really has the conscience to mention her, then it is that the leader sent a well-trained female comrade to flatter the enemy, who was then bewitched by her and killed in the end.
That’s right, they meant the kind of pretense of flattery where they haven’t even held hands. How ridiculous.
At least the history books won't write in a funny way that Xi Shi and Diao Chan relied on pretending to be nice to others, never even touching hands, just eating and flirting, and yet they accomplished state affairs in such a pure way.
However, there are still many fools who believe this idea of eating the cake and leaving it behind.
No matter how dumb Kuang Yumin and his group were, they all knew that you couldn't kill someone by just flattering them. If he didn't get any benefits, how could he be trusted? And within his small circle, no matter how dumb Kuang Yumin was, he knew that if he didn't give those people some benefits, how could they continue to follow him?
This benefit is her!
Wang Jiazhi thought, at least she had a chance, a chance to be defiled, and she couldn't even remember how many times he had tossed her around in bed with her, but in the end she became a pure female warrior who was just pretending to be friendly with the enemy and had never been touched by him.
Then some people will sigh and say that it turns out that it is so easy to eliminate traitors for the country. Just by pretending to be nice to him, you can kill such a big shot.
He said to her, "Never touch prostitution. Prostitution is the ugliest thing, unless you are completely devoid of conscience."
Wang Jiazhi laughed and said, "It's not enough to be completely devoid of conscience; having a fool's brain isn't enough either." Suddenly remembering something, she laughed and said, "I've been doing that lowly field work for three years. When will I get a promotion?"
He said, "If you haven't been promoted in three years, then you're not cut out for it."
Wang Jiazhi recalled the first time they met, Huang Lei and Ouyang's timid expressions. They were speechless, their faces sweating before anything happened. "Killing Lao Cao has made such a mess!" No wonder they've only been able to play the lowest-level roles for three years.
Sometimes she wondered what would happen if she didn't like Lao Yi at all, or even if he was even more terrifying, the kind of person she'd find disgusting and repulsive. Thinking back to what they'd done in bed in the beginning, she could certainly endure it with faith, without the possibility of any surprises. And what if, after all that, she was just a "hypocritically compliant" and pure person? For men, the humiliation of being raped was something so tragic and proud, but for women, it became something so filthy and shameless that it couldn't even be mentioned. From ancient times to the present, how many women have painfully sacrificed their bodies to have their chastity violated by those they hated and despised? Yet, when they sacrificed everything, the men who enjoyed the fruits of their labor despised them, despised them as filthy.
To this day, few people have praised Xi Shi and Diao Chan for their contributions to the country. People only say that Xi Shi was defiled by King Fuchai for so many years, so how could Fan Li not despise her; did Diao Chan like Dong Zhuo or Lu Bu more, and why didn't she stay with Lu Bu afterwards? Did she feel she was not worthy?
It is said that they have gone far away. Who knows if they were killed by the people above, who are afraid that if they are kept alive, people will say that the country is saving by selling women's bodies.
After all, they left their names behind, but most women sacrificed their lives in vain, without any trace at all.
Those males in power are so shameless as to sit back and reap the benefits.
Wang Jiazhi recalled the lines from a play written by Kuang Yumin when she was in school: "My brother is the only hope of the family. I only regret that I am a girl..."
With the only male in the family dead, there was no hope. Girls were useless, unable to kill the enemy and avenge their enemies.
She'd felt awkward reading those lines back then, but she was so in love with that jerk at the time that she didn't really mind, even reveling in them while acting. She'd been a complete idiot the whole time.
If she had been more sober, she would have seen that Kuang Yumin was an extreme sexist narcissist who looked down on women. The funny thing was that he was so proud of his masculine gender, yet he wanted a woman to fight naked in bed for him to gain fame.
Lao Yi once told her that working in this industry is like being a eunuch in the imperial palace. On the one hand, the superiors want to use you and cannot do without you, but on the other hand, they all despise you. It's just like brewing honey from a hundred flowers, for whom do you work hard and for whom do you enjoy the sweetness?
But in this line of work, men can at least get something for nothing like Wu Kuang, and if they do well, they can also hold a high position like him. Women suffer the most brutal torture, and are not even worthy of existing. At most, they are pure people who "fake the deal" and give nothing in return.
Wang Jiazhi recalled the looks in Old Wu's eyes and their meaning. She was just a prostitute. She had been doing it for so long, so what was there to be sad about? Shouldn't she be used to it by now? Why was she still acting so pretentiously?
Sometimes she hated it in her heart, wondering why she couldn't let them do it and experience what it felt like to be abused.
Ancient texts record numerous instances of generals taking concubines with them to battle. Whether this was true love or just pretense is unclear. It seems the generals simply slaughtered their concubines to feed the soldiers when rations ran low, demonstrating their leadership and integrity. It's as if the concubines were brought along solely to serve as food reserves, and the city dwellers sacrificed their homes and daughters to reward the troops. During famines, cannibalism erupted, with women being the first to be slaughtered and eaten. Daughters were sold first, and those who died of starvation were the first to die. The narrative still evokes the idea of selling sons and daughters for food. It's as if the sons were the first to be sold and eaten. A dead woman is no longer even worthy of appearing on Wenzi's list.
But the general had killed his concubine, a woman he had bought with his own money, and his daughter could be considered his personal property. Who were Old Wu and Kuang Yumin to her? She wasn't theirs, and they hadn't bought her. What right did they have to feel comfortable killing her and eating her own flesh? Yet, she foolishly thought they could do that.
In the past, she felt that if her own father, a close relative, treated her worse than a beast, how could she expect others to treat her well? But then she thought, her father had at least given birth to her and raised her for more than ten years. Those people had given birth to her, raised her, or even bought her. Why should she be tortured by them?
"I'm just stupid!" she hated in her heart.
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