Chapter 570: Allow Anger
Eeyore.
Sampras pushed open the door of the locker room and saw Gao Wen sitting on the bench in the middle.
His upper body leaned forward slightly, supporting his knees with his hands, his eyes lowered, staring at the ground, as if he was carefully counting the patterns on the floor tiles.
A little absent-minded.
Sampras glanced around. Gawain had already finished his shower and packed his luggage, and could leave at any time, but he didn't.
"...Gawain."
Sampras' throat felt a little itchy, so he called out to break the silence in the locker room, then swallowed and suppressed the urge to cough.
Gawain raised his head, noticed the person coming, and smiled, "Pete."
Then Gao Wen realized that he was in a daze in the locker room and had not left for a long time, so he quickly apologized.
"Sorry, sorry, I can leave now..."
Seeing Gawain standing up, picking up his equipment bag and preparing to leave, Sampras quickly stepped forward to stop Gawain.
"Let's talk."
After saying this, Sampras felt a little embarrassed. This kind of beginning was not what he had expected. It turned out that he was a bad talker.
Sampras sat down next to Gawain and watched Gawain sit down again, but he did not dare to look directly into Gawain's eyes. Instead, he thought silently for a while.
Gao Wen probably knew what Sampras wanted to say, and his mood was a little mixed, but looking at Sampras's bewildered look, he couldn't help but feel funny:
Want to laugh.
Sampras finally spoke before Gawain's mouth curled up.
"The night before the 2002 US Open final, I suffered from severe insomnia."
However, the first sentence made Gawain look up and look at Sampras unexpectedly, not anticipating the content of the conversation at all.
"I know I've won a lot of games, over 700 in my career, and God, I don't even know how I accomplished that."
"I lost a lot of games, probably more than 200. Winning and losing are just a normal part of my career."
“Even the Grand Slams are no exception.”
"I thought I could face winning or losing calmly, but that night, I was extremely scared. The fear of failure consumed me. I felt extremely small, helpless and cowardly. If Andre saw me like this, he would have laughed at me mercilessly."
As he spoke, Sampras relaxed, smiled, and glanced at Gawain, causing Gawain's mouth corners to rise slightly.
"After that final, I never played another match because I couldn't bear the slow disintegration of the Pete Sampras myth. My arrogance and pride wouldn't allow it."
A little bit of self-mockery made Gao Wen's mouth curl up a little bit, but he could taste the complexity and depth in Sampras' words.
Once upon a time, Sampras stood at the top of the world. He was ranked No. 1 in the world at the end of the year for six consecutive years. He wrote countless legends and countless records, which seemed to be impossible to surpass or break at the time. He had everything. In the professional tennis world, he was the one that everyone needed to look up to.
However, competitive sports are cruel, and even "gods" are no exception, such as Michael Jordan and Pete Sampras.
Injuries, age, and time have taken away their glory bit by bit. They have watched helplessly as the new generation replaced the old generation, and faced the sadness and bitterness of the heroes' twilight years. When they were young, failure made them angry, and when they were old, failure made them powerless. The taste of failure is never pleasant.
"In fact, looking back many years later, I think I was just a coward. I couldn't face the fact that my competitive state was slowly slipping away, failures might happen more frequently, and then I would be replaced by the younger generation. I couldn't face the fact that things were getting out of my control little by little."
"But if I'm braver, I believe I can still compete with Roger and Rafael. You know, I have never played against Rafa, which has always been a pity."
Sampras' words are very plain and simple, without the lightness and humor of Gawain, and even a little clumsy, but one can deeply feel his sincerity.
Sampras did not look at Gawain, but was lost in his own memories. His eyes slowly lost focus, and a complex mix of emotions surged to the tip of his tongue.
Gawain was a little curious, "Pete, I've never heard of these things."
Sampras shrugged, with a bitter smile on his face. "Of course, you definitely haven't heard of it, because I've never told anyone. To be precise, I've always refused to admit it. Maybe I'll mention it when I write my autobiography in the future, but I really don't have any plans to write an autobiography, so... shhh."
The latest novel is published first on Liu9shuba!
Sampras turned to look at Gawain and made a silencing gesture, "Especially don't tell Andre."
A smile flashed in Gawain's eyes, and he made a motion of zipping his mouth shut.
Sampras chuckled as well and let out a breath.
"I just want to say that it's normal to be afraid of failure. We are all afraid of failure, whether it's the first time or the last time, it won't change."
"Because this is competitive sports, winning and losing are part of our lives. Because we hate failure, we try our best to improve ourselves. Because we are afraid of failure, we fight without reservation until the last moment. And because we hate failure, we get angry, violent and out of control."
"Some people say that being too eager to win is actually a bad thing, because when victory blinds your eyes, things will become ugly; but for competitive sports, this desire to win is the source of passion and high morale. Victory is the driving force to break through the limits of oneself and challenge oneself, and it is also the goal that burns life and burns soul."
“So, we should allow anger.”
At this point, Sampras paused because he didn't know how to continue, nor was he sure about Gawain's condition. After all, he was a tongue-tied person and didn't know how to comfort Gawain. He just awkwardly told his own experience and didn't know how to summarize it.
It is precisely because of this that Sampras has always refused to be a coach, not because he is too proud, but because he is not sure what he can do for the players. Even now, Sampras still feels powerless. He knows that Gawain is facing an impact, but he doesn't know how to help.
Turning his head, Sampras saw Gawain's profile. The corners of his mouth were still slightly curved, as if it had been like this since he first met Gawain. He showed rare maturity and wisdom, instantly distanced himself from his peers and demonstrated his potential to interpret the game early on.
However, the Gawain in front of him was a little different. There was a hint of loss and confusion between his brows. He was not as furious or furious as Sampras had imagined, but more of a bewilderment. A tangled mess of thoughts swirled deep in his eyes, but were entangled like a tangled mess, making it difficult to distinguish and start.
So, what now? What should we do now?
(End of this chapter)