Six hours of silence
The night the first mock exam ended happened to be Cheng Yuan’s birthday.
That’s what senior year of high school is like. Even after the final exam, there are still mountains of homework.
The house is empty because my parents are on a business trip.
I was struggling with the last wrong question on my math test when my phone suddenly lit up. It was a message from Lulu: "Come to see you?"
I looked at the time and it was already midnight.
She usually goes to bed at this time.
Lulu is a person who is determined not to stay up late. She believes that "going to bed before 11 o'clock is the bottom line" and she swears that staying up late will affect her efficiency in attending classes the next day.
What happened today?
I just replied "OK" when the doorbell rang.
When she opened the door, Lulu was standing in the cold light of the corridor, two bottles of Tsingtao beer in her arms, her eyes unusually bright.
"On the hour?" She shook the bottle.
"Are you crazy? You have classes tomorrow!" I widened my eyes.
She was indeed not feeling well today. She was the one who refused to drink a sip of RIO and only drank Beibingyang soda during Chinese New Year, and now she suddenly asked for alcohol?
"Just one thing, to celebrate the end of the first mock exam... and Cheng Yu'an's birthday."
As she spoke, she had already squeezed in sideways, went into the kitchen with ease, and rummaged through the bottle opener, making a clinking sound.
When the beer cap popped open and golden foam gushed out, I suddenly remembered my childhood.
On many summer nights, a group of us gathered at the door of the convenience store, scrambling to drink the same bottle of soda.
Lu Xingye always likes to play tricks. Every time he shakes the bottle a few more times as a prank, the foam will spray everywhere, and then we will chase him around the yard and beat him.
At that time, the bubbles also rose up happily, accompanied by our unrestrained laughter.
At this moment, the bubbles were still jubilant, but only the sound of two clinking glasses remained.
After a few sips of beer, courage and sadness surged up together.
I looked out the window at the dark night. "It was so nice when we were kids. We were all together, so lively and bustling. Now it's just the two of us drinking here."
Lulu didn't respond, but instead tapped her wine bottle against mine, making a crisp "clang" sound.
"To us," she said.
Cheers to us.
Cheers to the "us" that were once so lively, and also to the "us" that now only have each other.
"You and Jiang Yuanzhou haven't reconciled yet?"
Lulu asked, she had obviously noticed the unusual low pressure between Jiang Yuanzhou and me a long time ago.
I shook my head.
What can I say? Even I can't figure it out.
Lulu patted my back as if to comfort me, then looked up at the ceiling and suddenly asked, "Niannian, what do you say...what is love?"
I was choked by her nonsensical question.
At our age, the word "like" is already heavy enough, while "love" seems so distant and grand.
I answered honestly, “I don’t know…I really don’t know.”
After hearing this, Lulu suddenly burst into laughter, "It seems that you and Jiang Yuanzhou are not really in love!"
I didn't argue and just stroked the bottle in silence.
That night, alcohol was like a key that opened the floodgates of memory and magnified all the sadness about parting.
We chatted about a lot of things, from the weird questions in the first mock exam to the fact that the cafeteria aunt's hands have been shaking more recently.
As we chatted, laughter and tears mixed together.
Lulu talked about how Cheng Yu'an almost got into a fight with someone when they were little because he wanted to help us girls get back the rubber bands that were hidden by the boys.
"He was so stupid back then," Lulu smiled, but her eyes were a little wet. "He was obviously a boy, but he always stood on the side of us girls."
As I listened, I thought a lot.
I thought of Cheng Yu'an looking at us with a strange expression and saying he didn't know us, I thought of Ye Zhixia gently closing the car door when she left, I thought of Lu Xingye disappearing at the gate with his suitcase, I thought of Jiang Yuanzhou's back as he walked away with a sullen face...
I don't know who suggested it first, but after the beer bottles were empty, we called Cheng Yu'an.
Maybe it was because his birthday was a legitimate reason, or maybe it was just a reckless impulse after being drunk.
We didn't have time to care whether the call was connected or not. We just put the phone on the coffee table and sang Happy Birthday to it at the top of our lungs, singing out of tune with a clear conscience.
Halfway through the song, Lulu's voice suddenly took on a strong nasal tone, and she choked up as she shouted into the microphone, "Cheng Yu'an, do you remember? Six years ago on your birthday, we sang the same song for you..."
She was talking about the year when Cheng Yu'an was eleven years old.
At that time, boys and girls were subconsciously divided into camps, and Cheng Yu'an was the only boy who "rebelled" to our girls' camp.
We pooled our pocket money to buy a fruit cake. In the flickering candlelight, he closed his eyes and made a wish, his long eyelashes casting shadows on his face.
As we sang our off-tune birthday song, he smiled so hard that his eyes curved into two crescents. That was the last time we saw him smile so freely.
Lulu snatched the phone, tears streaming down her face, her voice trembling.
"Cheng Yu'an! Why do you say you don't know us? I've always treated you like family! Do you understand what it means to be a family member?"
"Head of the family!" I cried out, the alcohol amplifying all the grievances.
In a trance, I thought of Ye Zhixia hysterically pushing me out of the house, "Lin Nian, can't you see that I don't want to be friends with you anymore?"
And Jiang Yuanzhou's impatient tone and the word "whatever"
At that moment, I couldn't tell for whom the tears running down my face were being shed.
I could only hear my own crying mixed with Lulu's screams, which was particularly unpleasant.
My memory of how we fell asleep afterwards is vague.
I just remember that my tears had dried up, the alcohol was taking effect, and the world was spinning.
The next morning, I was awakened by the sunlight shining through the curtains and had a splitting headache.
I forgot to draw the curtains last night.
I reached for my phone in a daze, and saw my hungover reflection on the screen, looking extremely embarrassed.
Just as I was about to check the time, I was suddenly awakened by the display on the screen.
The contact person is Cheng Yuan.
Talk duration: 6 hours and 14 minutes.
Not only did it connect.
And it’s still working now.
Just as I was staring at the string of numbers in a daze, the phone screen flashed twice, and the phone, which had only 2% battery left, went completely black and shut down.
I held the hot phone and stared at the black screen for a long time.
During these six hours, was there silence on the other end of the phone, or had no one been listening for a long time?
I don't know.
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