Chapter 369: Past Life Extra - Just as Memories Will Not Dissipate
Ye Wansheng covered his chest and slowly bent over, just like he had curled up on the ground before.
Lin Dan realized that there was a big problem. He didn't care about the buns anymore and hurriedly supported Ye Wansheng and asked:
"What's wrong with you? Is your chest hurting? Don't think about your sister. Don't think about anything else. Don't think about anything. Take a deep breath. Don't hold your breath."
"If you want to cry, just cry loudly. Just scream it out loud. Don't hold it in."
He was afraid that Ye Wansheng would feel depressed.
Ye Wansheng tried his best to adjust his breathing as he was told, but it became more and more rapid. Although his breathing had never stopped, there was endless dull pain in his chest, as if not a breath of air could enter it. The suffocating feeling squeezed his heart, and the pain was blocked in his body by his throat.
His whole body was shaking with pain, his spine was getting more and more bent, his mouth was open but no sound came out, his breathing tugged at his throat, pressing and tearing at it. Ye Wansheng wanted to vent his feelings by crying out loud, without caring about anything, to let out all his emotions, but for some reason he could only let out a few mournful moans from time to time, as if his throat was being strangled, his voice broken and incoherent, with only the tears that kept falling, wetting the ground.
Lin Dan was frightened and tried to help him sit down. At this time, Ye Wansheng suddenly coughed up a large mouthful of blood, shouted, fell to the ground, and burst into tears.
Lin Dan also cried. His legs went weak almost at the same time as Ye Wansheng's. Then he touched the pool of blood on the ground with trembling hands. The blood seemed to be still warm, but it made him tremble even more violently.
"Ye Wansheng...Ye Wansheng, what the fuck is wrong with you?!"
Ye Wansheng knelt on the ground, raised his head and looked at the dark sky with tearful eyes. The light of the street lamp beside him seemed to have several more colors in his tears. The blood at the corner of his mouth flowed from his fair face along his jaw, over his neck and into his winter clothes.
shocking.
“I can’t go back.”
This is the second time he has said this today.
If you can’t go back to the first time, you can’t go back to the past.
I can’t go back this time, and I will never go back to Province F.
This sentence was followed by a violent coughing fit.
In fact, his health was not that good, much worse than Lin Dan's. He rushed to H Province to save money and did not buy a direct ticket to H Province because that would be too expensive.
They were looking for people to take with them in the convoy in fits and starts, and only took the train for the last part, so they had to travel some distance at night, and they couldn't eat or sleep well.
When I first arrived in Province H, I felt a little unwell.
Now, he couldn't just hold on any longer.
"Fuck it, who said I can't go back? I have my money, tickets and letters of introduction all in my pocket. There's no way I can't go back. It's impossible!"
Lin Dan grabbed Ye Wansheng's clothes and roared hoarsely, then tried to pull him up from the ground, "Fuck you, you are a few years older than me, you can't be more useless than me, Ye Wansheng, do you hear me? Uncle Ye and Aunt Zhu are still waiting for you to come back."
"You must go back..."
"Stop sitting here."
During the tug of war, Ye Wansheng seemed to have listened to his words:
"You're right, my mom is still waiting for me, and my dad's feet are not good..."
He seemed to have cheered up again, but when he tried to stand up with Lin Dan's force, he coughed up blood again.
Ye Wansheng knelt on the ground, looking at his hands full of blood, crying and laughing: "Don't worry about me."
Lin Dan couldn't laugh at all. If Ye Wansheng didn't look vulnerable, he would have even wanted to beat him up.
"What the fuck are you talking about? Get up... Please don't sit on the ground. It's just some blood. I've seen blood every time I've been fighting with people outside."
"Lin Zhi and Lin Ge both call you Brother Ye. Okay, I'll recognize you as my brother too. Can I go get money to treat your illness?!"
“Let’s go!!”
"You go now." Ye Wansheng pulled out his hand, stood up and walked to the bridge, "Go back and tell my parents that my sister is seriously ill. I have to stay in H Province to take care of her for a while. You can take care of the captain."
He understood what he meant, and Lin Dan stepped forward and pulled his hand away from the bridge railing:
"I'm not omnipotent. I can't do it..."
"Let's go to the hospital first and let the doctor see you."
"It can be cured, Ye Wansheng, it can definitely be cured."
"Do you know what treatment means to our family? Is grandpa and grandma's illness serious?"
Is grandparents’ illness serious? It wasn’t serious at first, but they had trouble even getting enough to eat, so how could they seek medical treatment?
My father owed a lot of debt just because of his leg, and it was fortunate that the creditor was Lin Dan.
It is difficult to get even a penny more from them.
Not to mention living in the cowshed, winter is the most difficult time.
After the New Year, it will be time for spring plowing. Even Ye Wansheng himself could feel the pain in his chest that never went away. His whole body was hot but his hands were shaking.
How can a person with such a body survive in the situation of being sent down to the countryside for reform?
What’s more…
"I don't have the courage anymore. Lin Dan, I really...can't live anymore."
Nearly a decade of torture was enough.
Before grandma passed away, she was still talking about wanting to see Mumu. After mother fell ill, she woke up from a dream in the middle of the night and said she was worried about Mumu.
When his father sent him out, he also told him to see his sister and to help her as much as he could and to check on her health.
Even thought that Mumu was old enough, he discussed with the couple to find her a reliable partner...
How was he going to bring back the news that his sister had been accused of being a spy and had died?
At that moment, Ye Wansheng felt that the remaining future was filled with endless despair just by thinking about it.
He really couldn't hold on any longer.
Lin Dan wiped the blood off his palm with his sleeve and sniffed: "How can he not survive..."
When he was young, he also felt that he couldn't live in extreme situations. That was because his emotions and thoughts went to extremes.
"You obviously managed to survive as a child..."
He knew that Ye Wansheng was different from him.
Ye Wansheng is strong and tenacious, but he can't bear this hurdle.
He was in despair, with only endless helplessness and shattered hope.
Lin Dan also wanted to help him, but he couldn't do anything.
"Without me, even though my dad has difficulty walking, he can still support our small family of two." He seemed to calm down, and his tone returned to its previous gentleness. His hoarse voice from crying sounded even softer.
Lin Dan didn't hear any life in it, it was like a broken doll making its last sound.
"Please help me. You know what to do. Don't tell them the truth. Tell them I'm here to take care of my sister."
"I can't help..." Lin Dan burst into tears and spoke intermittently with sobs, "I can't help..."
Ye Wansheng didn’t say anything else. He knew that Lin Dan would definitely help with this. As long as his parents didn’t know the truth, they could still hold on.
In fact, Ye Wansheng didn't know why the world was getting worse and why they had to keep living in this way.
He himself didn't want to live anymore, he even wanted to take his parents away with him.
Leave this hellish world.
But his reason told him that he couldn't do that.
He turned over and sat on the bridge railing. Lin Dan grabbed his clothes but couldn't say any words of advice.
In fact, if he were in Ye Wansheng's situation, he would make the same decision.
But……
"You don't want your sister to die, and you don't want your grandparents to die. I don't want you to die either, Ye Wansheng, I beg you, please don't die, okay?"
Ye Wansheng smiled desperately. A light rain began to fall from the sky, and the night wind blew it softly onto the two people's faces.
Ye Wansheng stretched out his hand to take it, remembering that after the Chinese New Year, spring would come and everything would revive. He felt even more ironic and desperate, and murmured in a trembling voice:
"If you want the spring rain to moisten the earth, don't let the spring wind stir up wild waves."
"Lin Dan, just consider it as a send-off for me."
Lin Dan looked at him for a moment, then slowly let go of Ye Wansheng's hand.
In his heart, this kind of world and death are for people in their situation.
It's a relief.
So, he let go of his hand and watched Ye Wansheng jump off the bridge railing. He didn't see Ye Wansheng struggle at all.
Lin Dan stood by the bridge railing, watching him sink, crying and laughing in despair.
Until later, Lin Dan's memory of that night, and even the past few days, was vague.
He remembered that Ye Wansheng died, but he didn't remember how he died.
He remembered what Ye Wansheng told him to say to Ye Jungui and his wife, but he couldn't remember Ye Wansheng's expression...
But he will always remember that Ye Wansheng was forced to death by this world.
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