My hands were shaking so badly I almost dropped the forceps. I had to take several deep breaths and stare at the operating light next to the dissection table.
I told myself, "Stay calm, stay professional, and don't let Qianluo down. She wants me to be a great forensic doctor."
Everything became lighter, like feathers soaked in sunlight, drifting into the distance. Even the pain in my heart lessened, like a wound soaked in warm water, slowly healing.
I got up to say goodbye, and when my fingers touched the doorknob, I felt that my steps were much lighter than when I came, as if I had unloaded a burden that I had been carrying for a long time and that had made it hard to breathe.
The bundle contained longing, regret, and unease, but Xin Ziming's words gently caught them and put them down.
Even my shoulders felt relaxed, and the stiffness in my back disappeared. It was as if someone had massaged away all the tension, and I felt like I was walking on air.
As I stepped outside, a warm feeling suddenly spread through my limbs and bones, like being immersed in warm water that had just been warmed in the spring morning, warming me from head to toe.
Every inch of his body exudes an indescribable sense of comfort, and even his fingertips feel warm.
Even the fists that had been clenched tightly due to tension naturally relaxed, and the sweat on the palms dried.
The weariness that has been lingering in my bones these past few days, the exhaustion from working overtime until late at night, and the mental strain I've been putting on while facing the dissection table.
The numbness when forcing composure to handle cases, feeling like an emotionless machine, even feeling tired to laugh, and the unease of tossing and turning at night.
I'm always afraid of forgetting what she looks like, afraid that after a long time I won't even remember her dimples when she smiles, afraid that she'll blame me for having a bad memory in another world.
I always suspect that those times were an illusion, afraid that I was just having a passionate dream, and that when I woke up, there was nothing left.
I'm always worried that I don't miss her enough and she'll blame me, saying things like, "Does A-Yun not love me anymore? Will she forget me soon? Will she fall in love with someone else?"
All of it was swept away, like snow blown by the spring breeze, melting away completely, leaving no trace, only a moist warmth.
She simply assumed that her inner knot had been untied and her blood and qi had flowed smoothly, and without giving it much thought, she smiled and walked toward the business car waiting at the door.
The evening breeze brushed against my cheek, carrying the sweet scent of jasmine from the flowerbed at the alley entrance, like the jasmine hard candy she used to slip into my pocket.
Back then, she would tiptoe and slip the candy into my pocket, her fingers gently brushing against my waist.
He smiled and said, "Ah Yun, now that you've eaten the candy, your heart won't feel bitter anymore. No matter how difficult the case becomes in the future, remember the sweet taste and remember that I'm by your side, accompanying you."
The night view outside the car window was dazzling, and the halo of the streetlights stretched into a blurry ribbon on the glass, like the pink hairband that Qianluo used to tie for me.
She said I looked good in pink, that it made my skin look fair and made me look like a little girl. I always thought it was childish, but I still secretly wore it several times when she wasn't looking and looked at myself in the mirror for a long time.
I felt like I really looked better, so I secretly took a picture and saved it on my phone, setting it as my screensaver.
Later she saw it, laughed at me for a long time, and said, "I knew you would like it. I'll buy you a few more in the future."
An indescribable sense of joy welled up inside me, like a white shirt hanging on a line after the rain, every inch of fabric soaked in the warmth of the sun, exuding a refreshing and clean feel.
Even breathing felt light and easy, like the comfort of panting in the wind after a run, and even the tightness in my chest disappeared.
Even when the driver looked at me in the rearview mirror and asked with a smile, "You seem to be in a good mood, would you like some music?", I smiled and nodded, which was rare for me.
I chose a piece of light music that Qianlu used to love the most—as soon as the intro started, she would gently sway her head, like a little penguin swaying to the rhythm.
She would also pull my hand and shake it with me, tilting her little face up, her eyes shining like stars.
He said, "Ah-Yun, let's dance to the music, like on TV, spinning around and seeing who can spin the fastest."
As the melody played, it was as if she were still sitting in the passenger seat, looking at me with her head tilted to the side, her eyes curved like crescent moons dipped in honey, her voice soft and sweet, with a touch of coquettishness.
"Ah Yun, this song is so nice, shall we play it when we drive from now on?"
That way, no matter where we go, it'll feel like we're walking together. Even if you go on a mission to a faraway place, I can keep you company with music, and you won't be lonely.
Unbeknownst to me, the moment I turned to leave, Xin Ziming's fingertips twitched slightly, and a wisp of almost transparent spiritual energy, like silkworm silk, silently wrapped around the hem of my clothes.
The spiritual energy carried a hint of jasmine's sweet fragrance, like the scent on Qianluo's body, flowing through her blood and into her limbs and bones, as gentle as a spring stream flowing over a rocky beach.
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