Chapter 327 I want you to be happy more than anyone else
Mu Nanyan's question was like a stone falling into a deep pool, causing silent ripples between the two of them.
She subconsciously clenched her phone, her knuckles turning slightly white from the force. She looked at Tang Yutong on the phone nervously, wanting to know the answer from her.
Tang Yutong's eyelashes on the other side of the screen trembled slightly, casting a shadow under her eyes.
Mu Nanyan could clearly see the small mole on the tip of her nose, which rose and fell gently with her breathing. This was a detail she was very familiar with.
Tang Yutong suddenly spoke, her voice covered with a veil:
"My facial mask time is up. If you have nothing else to do, I'll hang up first."
Mu Nanyan looked at the hand reaching for the hang-up button in the video and shouted hurriedly:
"Yutong, running away won't solve the problem!"
Her voice sounded particularly sharp in the empty living room.
The picture shook violently, and Tang Yutong's face flashed before the camera.
In the end, the screen returned to darkness, revealing Mu Nanyan's pale reflection.
She threw her phone heavily onto the sofa, and the collision of metal and fabric made a dull sound.
My chest felt like it was being pressed down by a huge rock, and every breath was accompanied by a dull pain.
In Mu Nanyan's 28 years of life, Tang Yutong was her first true friend.
They had agreed to be each other's bridesmaids, to travel around the world together, and to be the most fashionable old ladies in the nursing home.
Was this the end of their long-standing friendship? Was even a candid conversation now impossible?
Mu Nanyan sat on the sofa in a daze. She didn't know how long it had been before a familiar sound of music rang out in the empty living room.
"I didn't like you the first time we met, but who knew we would become so close later on? We're like summer and autumn..."
The cell phone suddenly vibrated, and the melody of "One is Like Summer and the Other is Like Autumn" was particularly clear in the silent room.
Mu Nanyan's whole body froze. This was the ringtone she had set specifically for Tang Yutong, and it was also the song they had insisted on singing in KTV even when their voices broke.
Tang Yutong always said that this song is a portrayal of them, one is as passionate and flamboyant as midsummer, and the other is as quiet and introverted as late autumn.
The name on the caller ID made Mu Nanyan's fingers tremble.
This was the first time Tang Yutong had contacted her since that ridiculous drunken incident.
She almost pounced on the phone, fearing that the other party would change his mind if she was a second late.
The moment the answer button was pressed, Mu Nanyan even held her breath.
The video was reconnected, and Tang Yutong in the picture had already removed her facial mask. There were still drops of water on her fair face and water was dripping from the ends of her hair.
Her red and swollen eyes and nose revealed that she had gone beyond just washing her face.
"Don't you want to talk? Okay, let's make it clear once and for all today."
Tang Yutong's voice was hoarse, but it carried an unprecedented determination.
Her gaze looking directly into the camera made Mu Nanyan's heart tremble. There were so many emotions surging in it: anger, grievance, unwillingness, and a barely perceptible expectation.
At this moment, all the disguises and courtesies between them were completely torn off, just like peeling off a scabbed wound, revealing the bright red flesh underneath.
Mu Nanyan's fingertips trembled slightly, and her nails scratched the edge of the phone case unconsciously.
She took a deep breath, as if to draw all her courage into her lungs, before she dared to look directly into the red and swollen eyes on the screen.
"Okay, let's talk about it today."
Then Mu Nanyan asked the same question again:
"So you're mad at me? That's why you haven't been willing to answer my calls or reply to my messages these past few days."
Tang Yutong's mouth curled up into a bitter arc, and she raised her hand to tuck the scattered hair behind her ears. This habitual action reminded Mu Nanyan of the scene when they stayed up late to review in college.
"Am I mad at you? I just don't know how to face you."
Tang Yutong chuckled, with a hint of self-mockery in her laughter.
These words were like a blunt knife, slowly piercing into Mu Nanyan's heart.
She looked at Tang Yutong's red eyes in the video and suddenly found it difficult to breathe.
"sorry……"
Mu Nanyan blurted out these words almost instinctively. She didn't know what else to say besides sorry...
Tang Yutong raised her head suddenly, water dripping from her chin, and it was hard to tell whether it was unwiped water or tears:
"What are you apologizing for? You don't know anything."
"But if Lu Yiran and I had completely cut off contact, Chu Ci wouldn't have..."
Mu Nanyan's words were interrupted by a choked scolding.
"Stop talking!"
Tang Yutong's voice was broken, and she wiped her eyes fiercely with the back of her hand:
"These past few days I've been wondering...whether I should blame you or not."
A teardrop fell on the phone screen, and Mu Nanyan realized that she was crying.
"You can blame me, but I'd rather you scold me than hide from me like this."
Suppressed sobbing was heard from the other end of the phone, and Tang Yutong's shoulders were trembling slightly.
"But this matter has nothing to do with you. If you hadn't told me, I would still be kept in the dark and being deceived by Chu Ci..."
Mu Nanyan saw Tang Yutong clutching the hem of her pajamas, the fabric wrinkled between her fingers.
She paused for a long time, so long that Mu Nanyan thought the call was about to be disconnected again, then she heard the hoarse voice continue:
"You know what? What makes me saddest is not that Chu Ci lied to me, but that after I found out about this, the first person I wanted to find was you, but I didn't dare to call you..."
These words were like a sharp ice pick, piercing Mu Nanyan's heart accurately. She shook her head in disbelief.
"Why not? Didn't we agree to share everything?"
Tang Yutong on the screen suddenly collapsed, tears pouring out like a dam breaking:
"Because I'm afraid of seeing your guilty look. I'm afraid that you'll take all the responsibility on yourself like you are doing now! I'm even more afraid... I'm afraid that you'll push Lu Yiran away again because of this..."
Mu Nanyan was stunned when she heard this:
"You... don't you hate him?"
"I hate it, of course I hate it... But I can still distinguish some things. It was Chu Ci who lied to me, not you, nor Lu Yiran."
"But if it wasn't for the matter between me and Lu Yiran, Chu Ci wouldn't have come to you..."
Mu Nanyan repeated herself mechanically, as if she was stuck in a vicious circle that she couldn't escape.
Tang Yutong took a deep breath, raised her wet eyes and looked directly at the screen. Tears were still hanging on her eyelashes, but she tried hard to force a smile:
"Yan Yan, don't think like that. Although Chu Ci and I haven't known each other for a long time, I still have some understanding of him."
Mu Nanyan saw the corners of her mouth twitching slightly, as if she was suppressing some emotion.
"Actually, when Chu Ci and I first met, I knew he was a playboy."
"Then you..." Mu Nanyan was interrupted as soon as she opened her mouth.
"Are you asking me why I'm still with him?"
Tang Yutong smiled self-deprecatingly. This smile reminded Mu Nanyan of the romantic movie they watched together in college. At that time, Tang Yutong had also commented on the heroine: "Knowing it was a pit of fire, she still jumped in. How silly and adorable."
Mu Nanyan nodded and saw Tang Yutong on the screen looking up, as if trying to stop tears from flowing.
"Maybe there was something wrong with my brain at the time. I had seen so many handsome guys before, but I was still deceived by his appearance... At the beginning, my idea was very simple. I just wanted to have this relationship for fun."
Her fingers were twisted together, the knuckles turning white:
"As for when I started taking it seriously... maybe it was because his acting was so good. He gave me the illusion that I was special to him and that I could get his true love. Isn't that stupid?"
Mu Nanyan interrupted her distressedly:
"Don't say that about yourself. You just really like someone, and there's nothing wrong with that."
Tang Yutong wiped her face with the back of her hand and suddenly smiled:
"Nan Yan, I actually don't blame you anymore. I just... need some time to lick my wounds. Every time I see you, it reminds me of how much of a failure that relationship was..."
Mu Nanyan cried and laughed when she heard this:
"Silly boy, if we talk about failure, I'm divorced and still entangled with my ex-husband. Isn't that an even bigger failure?"
Tang Yutong's voice burst into laughter from the other end of the phone. That familiar, nasal laugh made Mu Nanyan's eyes warm.
Tang Yutong sniffed and said with a smile:
"Then we two are truly... a league of losers..."
At this moment, time seems to flow backwards.
They turned back into the two girls in the college dormitory, wrapped in the same blanket and sharing the same bag of potato chips, one crying loudly while the other fumbled to pass her tissues.
Finally, Tang Yutong said softly:
"Nan Yan, let's make peace. Without you these days, I don't even have anyone to complain to..."
"good."
Mu Nanyan wiped away her tears and the corners of her mouth rose unconsciously.
She hesitated for a moment, then asked cautiously:
"You and Chu Ci..."
Before Mu Nanyan finished speaking, Tang Yutong said directly:
"I think we broke up. He probably didn't have the face to see me. It was like he disappeared from the face of the earth after that day."
When Tang Yutong said this, her eyes were no longer evasive, but instead had a sense of relief and calmness.
Mu Nanyan's heart seemed to be gripped by an invisible hand.
Adult relationships are always like this: they start unclearly and end silently, and even a formal goodbye becomes a luxury.
Mu Nanyan looked at her friend's relaxed brow on the screen and suddenly realized that this time, she had really let it go.
It’s not about pretending to be strong or escaping from reality, but about truly reconciling with yourself.
"Yutong, it's Chu Ci who's not worthy of you. You're such a good person, you'll definitely meet someone a thousand times better than him in the future."
"Thank you, Yanyan."
Tang Yutong's smile finally showed some real warmth. Although there were still tears in the corners of her eyes, she was able to look directly into the camera.
The room fell silent for a moment, leaving only the breathing sounds of the two people intertwined through the airwaves.
Suddenly, Tang Yutong sat up straight, his eyes becoming extremely serious:
"But...you have to promise me one thing."
"What?"
Mu Nanyan subconsciously held her breath.
"Don't let my affairs affect your relationship with Lu Yiran. Although Chu Ci lied to me, this incident made me realize one thing - Lu Yiran really likes you."
Tang Yutong spoke word by word, and each word seemed to strike Mu Nanyan's heart. Her fingers suddenly tightened, and her nails left several crescent-shaped marks on her palms.
"Yan Yan, Lu Yiran is like the prince of the Beijing circle. What kind of woman can't he get? But he is willing to spend so much time to understand your preferences. This thought alone... I don't know what you are thinking, but please don't let my affairs affect your decision."
The night came in from the window, casting mottled light and shadows on Mu Nanyan's face.
She saw that Tang Yutong's eyes were red again, but she was still trying to smile:
"Yanyan, I hope you can be happy more than anyone else. No matter what decision you make, I will stand by you."
Tang Yutong spoke word by word, his expression full of seriousness.
This was the first time since they met that Tang Yutong talked about her and Lu Yiran so seriously.
Mu Nanyan felt a warm current surge in her chest, making her eyes hot.
"good."
Mu Nanyan responded with a smile.
After hanging up the phone, Mu Nanyan walked to the window.
The night wind blew across my cheeks, bringing with it the coolness of early autumn. The lights of the city in the distance flickered like scattered stars.
She took a deep breath and felt that the huge rock that had been weighing on her heart for many days finally loosened.
Tang Yutong hopes that she will be happy, and she also hopes that Tang Yutong will be happy. It is precisely because of this that Mu Nanyan is so determined to draw a clear line between herself and Lu Yiran.
She didn't want to hurt Tang Yutong a second time because of herself.
But in her mind, Lu Yiran's words that day unconsciously emerged:
"This matter has nothing to do with me."
I remembered Lu Yiran's tense jawline and the flash of hurt in his eyes.
She couldn't help but start to think wildly, is this matter really not related to Lu Yiran? Did she misunderstand him?
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