beauty
Since that night's outing, seeing that she enjoyed it, Lu Chang would occasionally make time to take Jingwan out through that small door.
They chatted most often about food and local customs, and eventually, even the taboo stories of the Northwest were completely stripped away and became their favorite topics of conversation.
“When I was little, things were not peaceful there. There were frequent battles. At that time, the Rong people were causing trouble, and my mother even took me to escape to the mountains. Later, when I was older, a great general drove the Rong people away, and we were finally able to mine jade in peace.”
Jingwan took a sip of the rice noodle, chewed it slowly, and then slowly began to tell Lu Chang what she had learned.
He had asked earlier if the Northwest was still peaceful, and Jingwan thought for a moment before only telling him what she still remembered.
It seemed she really liked the glass noodles, and even added a lot of vinegar. Before long, she finished all the side dishes in her bowl. She then bit her chopsticks and glanced at Lu Chang's bowl, which he hadn't touched much.
Lu Chang pushed the bowl forward and smiled helplessly: "Eat!"
Having spent time together, Jingwan knew that he didn't like to eat too much at night, so she didn't stand on ceremony and moved the dishes from inside to her bowl little by little.
"Do you still remember the great general who drove the Rong people away?"
Without a second thought, she shook her head: "I don't remember. My mother never allowed me to ask about these things, and she forbade me to have any contact with the soldiers over there."
Lu Chang had intended to remind her of that incident in the Northwest, but after hearing what she said, he gave up on the idea.
She was very young then, so she probably never mentioned to others that she had guided a group of soldiers. She probably didn't remember it then, and now she's probably forgotten it.
But... but although they only spent three days together, they were always in the same place. How could they forget so easily!
Jingwan could sense that Lu Chang seemed disappointed, but she really couldn't figure out what she had said that made her cousin unhappy. The rice noodles were still in her mouth, hanging long in her bowl, and she couldn't even enjoy eating them.
Lu Chang looked up at her dazed expression, smiled and shook his head, then gave her all the vermicelli from his bowl.
Then he said, "Eat."
Jingwan remained silent, and finished both bowls of noodles.
Thanks to Lu Chang's occasional treats, she grew to be as tall as the two Gao family girls the following year.
That year, Jingwan was fifteen. The girl who was once like a flower bud had blossomed into a beautiful woman. Even in simple clothes, she could not hide her stunning beauty. Gao Yun became increasingly impatient to see her, so she stayed in her own courtyard, writing, reading, and carving jade. She always had something to do to pass the time.
Even a fairy would begin to feel love at such a young age, especially with such a remarkable cousin by her side.
She didn't know when she had become so eager to see Lu Chang.
But lately, I keep thinking about him.
While eating, she would think about where Lu Chang was. While carving jade, she would wonder if Lu Chang would take her out tonight. As she thought about these things, she even lost the shape of the jade she was carving.
She put down the carving knife, slumped on the table, and sighed in embarrassment and annoyance, but the sweetness in her heart was undeniable.
The courtyard was quiet, except for a little wild cat that seemed to be rummaging through something, making noise in the yard.
White teeth biting red lips, a girl's tender feelings lingering, sticky as honey dripping into the heart.
Lu Chang... Lu Chang...
She whispered his name, making sure no one else could hear.
That night, which happened to be the Shangsi Festival, Lu Chang took her out to play again.
During the day, Jingwan heard that the Gao family children had made an appointment to go on a spring outing to Guxia Mountain. She also saw that they were all carrying kites, and she was very envious.
According to Gao Yun, they had also made plans with their best friends to go play in the water near the shore.
Jingwan knew that Gao Yun was deliberately ignoring her, and although she told herself not to care, she was still disappointed.
Therefore, when Lu Chang stood before her tonight, Jingwan felt only joy.
Lu Chang's arrival filled the void in his heart.
Gao Yun was unaware that she also had her own unique happiness.
As usual, Jingwan tugged at Lu Chang's sleeve and followed behind, saying, "The imperial examinations are just around the corner. Cousin, aren't you going to stay home and prepare for the exams?"
Lu Chang turned to look at her: "Do you hope I pass the exam?"
Jingwan knew that men in the Great Wei Dynasty would enter the Golden House for decades from the age of three to obtain official rank and bring glory to their ancestors. Once they entered officialdom, they would rise rapidly in rank and not fall into the ranks of ordinary people.
But would someone as upright and honest as my cousin have such thoughts?
Perhaps it's not up to him whether he wants to or not; life always pushes him forward.
The topic was dropped, and Lu Chang asked her, "Today is the Shangsi Festival, is there anywhere you'd like to go?"
Remembering what Gao Yun had said, Jing Wan immediately said, "I want to go play by the water."
Lu Chang was taken aback. By the water? Then he smiled knowingly.
According to the folk customs of the Great Wei Dynasty, during the Shangsi Festival, young girls would go to the water's edge to pick orchids and play, celebrating their growth.
The orchids by the water had already been picked clean by the girls of Pingdu during the day. Although it was dark, there were still quite a few people gathered in twos and threes by the water.
Jingwan was a little timid and tugged at Lu Chang's long sleeve: "Cousin, I think I'd better not go."
She wasn't afraid of running into Yang Nancheng and his ilk again, but since her cousin had acquaintances in Pingdu, she decided to avoid getting recognized and not join in the fun.
Seeing that there were many people by the water, and they were all young women, Lu Chang felt it was inconvenient to stay with Jing Wan. Now that she had suggested not going, he felt it was a great pity. He also felt sorry that she had few friends in Pingdu and could not go out to play with her friends even on such a festive occasion for women. So he grabbed her wrist through her clothes and suddenly turned her around: "Come with me."
Jingwan was pulled by him and almost fell on top of him, her skirt fluttering, her beauty stunning.
He spent countless amounts of gold and silver to bring a horse from the bustling market, lifted Jingwan onto the horse, and rode straight out of the city gate, galloping away with her towards the outside of the city.
She didn't ask him where he was going, but just leaned against him, her heart pounding, feeling so close to him.
The moonlight was especially bright that night, and the shadows of the trees could be clearly illuminated without the need for extra candlelight.
Lu Chang led her from the front, but she only paid attention to his large hand.
Finally, they heard the babbling of a stream and stopped. A stream flowed down from the mountain and into a pond. The pond was spacious and surrounded by huge, round blue stones. The moonlight fell into the water, illuminating even the pebbles at the bottom. When they scooped up the water, they found it to be crystal clear.
Lu Chang tied up the horse and sat cross-legged on the large blue stone. He then advised her that the water was cold and she shouldn't be too playful.
How could Jingwan not be happy?
Just how long has it been since I last played by the water?
The Gao family's walls bound her body and her free spirit; now that she's out, it's like a rebirth.
She took off her shoes and socks, lifted her skirt high, and as her left foot gently touched the water, she felt an unbelievable sense of exhilaration.
Lu Chang turned his head and inadvertently saw those delicate white feet. His breath caught in his throat, and he quickly turned his head away to calm himself down.
Jingwan kicked the pool water high into the air, laughing incessantly as she entertained herself. Lu Chang glanced at her again, restraining himself from looking elsewhere rudely.
But he didn't want to see it, yet he couldn't blame the person for coming to provoke him.
Jingwan had been digging for jade in the water since she was a child. Taking off her shoes and lifting her trousers to touch the jade was a habit ingrained in her bones. She didn't care about showing her little feet to others. Seeing that Lu Chang ignored her, she lifted her skirt and went over.
She was still standing in the pool, one of her small, white feet stretched out, and said, "Cousin, look!"
Lu Chang looked down and saw that on her round toes was a small fish the size of a willow leaf bud.
He couldn't see the fish at all; all he could see were those tender white feet. He hastily looked away and turned to the side.
Jingwan then lifted her skirt and sat down next to him, and in an instant, there were two people sitting on the large blue stone.
One tall and one short, one big and one small, they are quite well-matched.
Jingwan swung her feet in the water, letting the water drip from her toes and then swirl around...
"This place is so beautiful!" she exclaimed softly.
Lu Chang deliberately kept looking at the mountains and rivers in front of him and replied, "I found this place by chance. Whenever I'm in a bad mood, I come here alone and sit for a while."
Six years in Pingdu could not rid him of his inner turmoil. Whenever he recalled the past, he would feel uneasy, but he dared not let anyone notice anything amiss. So he would come to this secluded place alone, pick up a dry branch and practice his swordsmanship by the water, until he was drenched in sweat, he would clean it up and go back.
It was at this moment that Jingwan realized that her cousin was not as carefree as she had imagined. He was a young master from a wealthy family, who did not indulge in the hustle and bustle of the world, but instead escaped to this deserted waterside to linger alone. How many things were hidden in his heart?
"I heard that my cousin's father was also a great general?" she asked hesitantly.
It must have been someone in the household who told her, but they didn't know the details, so she only had a general idea.
Before she passed away, his mother instructed him not to mention his father or her in front of others.
"Just think of your father as dying on the battlefield for your country, and your mother as not wanting to live alone and following her husband. Do not harbor any hatred. If you go to Pingdu in the future, forget about what happened in the Northwest. Do not... do not remember your parents anymore."
He still remembers his mother holding him and crying bitterly. On the day of his father's funeral, his mother committed suicide by throwing herself against the coffin. He lost all his loved ones.
The arrow that pierced the father's back on the battlefield pierced the mother's heart in a different way seven days later.
From then on, he never mentioned the Northwest again, nor his parents.
But endless longing eventually needs an outlet, and this pool of water has absorbed countless tears of longing for his parents.
“My father was a soldier. My mother loved him dearly and didn’t want to be too far away from him, so she took me with her to live in the army. Later, my father died on the battlefield, and my mother followed him.”
If Jingwan hadn't grown up in the Northwest, she wouldn't have been able to understand the pain of losing loved ones on the battlefield. Now, hearing Lu Chang say this, she also felt sad.
“When I was five years old, my mother planned to get married. The man she was going to marry was a mediocre soldier. He liked my mother very much. He would buy her rouge and face powder and drive away those who bullied us. We all liked him very much. My mother said that they would get married when he returned from the war. Unfortunately, my mother did not live to see him. Some of the soldiers who left with him returned. They said that he died at Fengqiu Pass.”
"After that, my mother stopped mentioning marriage."
Later, she stopped applying rouge and powder to her face and stopped wearing clean and pretty clothes. She deliberately ate until she was bloated and let the wind and frost leave more marks on her face.
There is no longer any hope.
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