I don't!
Why!?
Why have I always been inferior to my opponents since I was a child? Even after entering the palace, I still feel inferior to my opponents. Until now, I thought I had planned everything perfectly, but in the end, I still ended up back to square one!?
I had a serious illness.
Then, when all the concubines returned to the arms of their father and mother, I sat in front of the mirror, shaved my head and became a nun, and left home from then on.
They are praising me again.
Concubine Praise is virtuous and kind, and her heart is devoted to the people; Concubine Praise does not fight or compete, and is as indifferent as the clouds.
Yeah?
I suddenly felt that this was the greatest punishment God had given me, making an ambitious person lie beside a green lamp for a long time, and making a person who wanted to look down on everyone worship before a Buddha statue every day.
I don't have real power, all I can get are those vague and empty so-called praises.
That night, I was in front of the magnificent Buddha statue. I suddenly became furious and wanted to go forward and overturn the offerings, but I didn't expect the candlestick to be knocked over by the cloth, the candle oil spilled, and a big fire ignited instantly.
I hurriedly ran out of the temple, but ended up becoming a sinner who desecrated the Buddha statue.
They all said that Concubine Liu De had gone mad and wanted to burn down the Dapushan Temple, but she was scared and ran away.
Yeah, I'm crazy.
Now I don’t even have those empty praises. What the world gives me is endless pity and sighs.
This makes me feel worse than hatred and disgust.
When I heard a pilgrim sighing for me, I suddenly rushed out of the woodshed, grabbed his neck and told him to shut up.
He rolled to the ground in fear, and I looked down at him. It felt good, like looking at an ant that could be stepped on at any time.
On the day when the sun made the ground hot and white, I knocked over the candlestick again, but this time, I didn't run away.
I just stood there, watching the raging fire surrounding me, feeling this rare heat in the world.
This is the temperature that should be felt when supreme power is held in your hands.
-over-
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