Chapter 109 Niuhulu Yuning brand cute killer shocking debut
Imperial Palace, Secret Experiment Site, Two Days Later
Deep within the imperial palace, in a huge training ground heavily guarded where even birds couldn't fly, the solemn atmosphere was tinged with a hint of...an indescribable strange anticipation.
Emperor Nangong Yu sat on the main seat on the high platform. Crown Prince Nangong Chengqian and Marquis Dongfang Liezheng, who could not go to the war but had to be present to watch his sister show off her skills, and core figures such as Prince Yong Nangong Ye sat on both sides.
Everyone's eyes were focused on the petite figure in the field, dressed in a neat modified riding outfit, her face glowing with excitement - Princess Fuxing, the new debris flow in the arms world of Yan Kingdom, Dongfang Niuhulu Yuning!
Beside her, Prince Yong Nangong Ye is like her most loyal guard and...chief tool.
The sleeves of his black uniform were rolled up, revealing his sturdy forearms. In his hands, he was carrying a huge toolbox with a pink strawberry pattern printed on it...?
There was still no expression on the icy face, but when his eyes fell on the spirited little woman beside him, there was an overwhelming doting and indulgence.
"Brother-in-law! Godson! Big brother! Watch out!"
Dongfang Yuning put his hands on his waist, full of vigor and energy, and spoke in a clear voice.
"Two days of retreat, and the results are remarkable! Fuying's daily love education package makes its stunning debut today! The first show is Crash Landing on You: Limited Edition Strawberry Mini Grenade!"
System 118 passionately explained in her mind:
[Beep! 'Crash Landing on You' KPI activated! Experimental target: Scarecrow formation 50 meters ahead (simulating a dense formation of Fuying infantry)! Host, please begin your performance! (The system plays a cute version of "Love Cycle" background music)]
Dongfang Yuning flipped her little hand and, like a magic trick, pulled out a few… round, pink, and realistically painted strawberry seeds… “fruits” from the strawberry tool box that Nangong Ye was holding?!
Everyone: “…”
Although I was mentally prepared, seeing this pink and cute "weapon" with my own eyes still made my worldview a little shocked.
[118! Are you ready? 3! 2! 1! Launch!]
Dongfang Yuning counted down in her heart, but her movements were neat and tidy! She pulled out the green "stalk" at the top of the strawberry, which was actually a safety pin, and raised her hand with force!
The cute pink "strawberry" drew a beautiful parabola in the air and landed precisely in the center of the scarecrow formation!
“Bang!!!!”
An explosion that was not particularly deafening but extremely crisp was heard!
There was no flames as expected, only a ball of pink... smoke?!
It spread out instantly! In the smoke, countless tiny, sparkling steel balls shot out like flowers scattered by fairies!
Puff puff puff——!
Intensive piercing sounds rang out! When the smoke cleared, the center of the scarecrow formation was revealed, as if it had been brutally ravaged by an invisible giant hand!
Seven or eight scarecrows were blown to pieces, with straw debris flying everywhere! Even more terrifying was that the scarecrows around them were densely packed with holes deeply embedded with tiny steel balls!
If this were a real person... he would definitely be beaten into a sieve in an instant!
“Wow!”
Crown Prince Nangong Chengqian couldn't help but let out a low cry, his eyes widening.
Emperor Nangong Yu's hand holding the teacup trembled:
[…Pink smoke? Strawberry bomb? This way of dying… is too girly, right? But… this damage range and control… is amazing! How did Ning come up with this?!]
He tried hard to control his facial muscles and maintain his imperial dignity, but the villain in his heart was already clapping wildly.
Dongfang Liezheng's blood boiled as he watched:
[Good! That's powerful! She looks cute, but she's really badass! She's worthy of being my sister! If I throw this thing into a group of people supporting the cherry blossoms... the scene is too beautiful to even imagine!]
(Swallows silently)
Dongfang Yuning clapped his hands proudly, put his hands on his hips and looked towards the platform:
How's it going, brother-in-law? Is this crash landing of love romantic enough? Is it surprising enough?
The people who support the cherry blossoms will surely be moved to tears after receiving this gift package of love! 118, did you record it? That parabola just now was perfect!
System 118:
[Ding! Perfect hit! KPI achieved! Host's throwing posture: perfect score! Explosion effect: built-in pink filter, romantic and bloody! Highly artistic! (System displays slow-motion playback animation)]
"good."
Nangong Yu nodded reservedly, trying hard to suppress the corners of his mouth that were raised.
"It's quite powerful, but its appearance... is quite deceptive. Next!"
"Next!"
Dongfang Yuning waved her hand and pointed to a simple watchtower built with thick wooden boards in the distance (simulating the Fuying City Tower).
"Awakening in the World - Cutie Bazooka! Target - the watchtower! Brother Aye, get your weapons!"
Nangong Ye immediately stepped forward and smoothly took out a device with an equally unique shape from the huge strawberry tool box.
The rocket launcher is a dreamy pastel blue, with cute cloud and rainbow designs painted on it! The firing port is shaped like a cartoon whale's head with its mouth wide open!
It's more like a large children's toy than a weapon!
The corners of everyone's mouth twitched even more violently:
[This…this thing can be used for war?!]
Nangong Ye remained calm, and professionally carried the Cornetto bazooka steadily on his shoulder. He turned his head to look at Dongfang Yuning, asking:
"Ning'er?"
Dongfang Yuning stood on tiptoe and solemnly helped Nangong Ye adjust the position of the shoulder pad, which was actually not necessary. She patted his shoulder with her small hand:
"Brother Aye! Aim! Fire! Let them experience the sobriety of life!"
[118! Special effects maxed out! Background music starts!]
Dongfang Yuning gave orders in his heart.
System 118:
[Received! 'Awakening' mode activated! Target locked! High-energy version of the "unstoppable" background music loading! 3! 2! 1! Fire in the hole! (System simulates rocket launch countdown sound effect)]
Nangong Ye's eyes were as sharp as an eagle, and his finger pulled the trigger steadily!
"call out--!!!"
A rocket with a pink tail flame, like an angry cartoon whale, roared and rushed towards the wooden watchtower in the distance!
“BOOM——!!!”
This time, there was a deafening roar! The earth seemed to tremble!
Flames shot up into the sky! Thick smoke billowed! Under the horrified gaze of the crowd, the seemingly sturdy wooden watchtower instantly shattered like a building block struck by a giant's fist!
Broken wood and dirt were blown more than ten meters high, leaving only a charred pit and curling smoke.
The shock wave from the explosion even stirred up a strong wind, causing the robes of everyone on the platform to rustle!
Dead silence!
Absolute dead silence!
Everyone was stunned by the absurd contrast in power! Looking at the pink and blue, rainbow-painted "toy," and then at the terrifying, still smoking crater in the distance, three or four meters in diameter...
【Fuck! 】
This is the common voice in everyone's heart.
Crown Prince Nangong Chengqian opened his mouth so wide that an egg could fit in it:
[But…cute?! This…this is clearly a human cannon! Auntie…you call this ‘cute’?! How many hits can Fuying’s walls…take?!]
The emperor Nangong Yu finally lost his grip on the teacup, and it fell to the ground with a "bang" and shattered into pieces!
He was completely unaware, his eyes fixed on the big pit:
[This… my palace’s martial arts arena!!! But… it’s worth it! It’s so worth it! This thing… is so damn refreshing! Emperor Fusakura’s palace, I think I’ll use it to clear my mind!]
Dongfang Liezheng's face flushed with excitement, and he clenched his fists:
[Good! Good! Good! This thing is awesome! Look at the woman moaning, and when it explodes, it's much more powerful than my big knife blade! Ning'er! Make more! Big brother will reimburse you for the materials!]
Dongfang Yuning looked at his masterpiece and nodded with satisfaction:
[Well, the power is okay, but the recoil is a bit strong. Brother Aye's shoulders even shook.
118, I'll go back and optimize the shock absorption! As for the appearance... light blue with rainbow, maybe add some little stars? It'll be more dreamy?
System 118:
[Received! Shock absorption optimization plan being generated! Appearance suggestion: Host wise! Add some glitter stars, and the explosion will have a blingbling special effect, giving the enemy a sense of fantasy before ascending to heaven! (The system displays a glitter explosion special effect animation)]
Nangong Ye put down the still smoking Cornetto bazooka, rubbed his slightly numb shoulders, and looked at Dongfang Yuning with eyes full of amazement and... pride.
His little princess always brings him unexpected shocks.
"The third one!"
Dongfang Yuning waved her hand again, pointing to an open area.
"Scratch-off Surprise Connect Minefield! Test Subject—Up!"
Several guards immediately came up carrying a large iron cage. Inside the cage were a dozen lively, croaking... toads?!
Everyone: “…”
Using a toad to test a mine? This is very Niuhulu Yuning!
[118! Quick! Blur these toads! They may be ugly, but they're also little heroes dedicated to science!]
Dongfang Yuning is quite humane at heart.
System 118:
[Blurred! Mosaic loading complete! (The system displays a GIF of a group of toads with mosaics on their heads) Experiment begins!]
The guards opened the cage and drove a group of toads with mosaics on their heads into the seemingly ordinary open space.
The first toad took just two steps...
"Puff!" A muffled sound! A huge, foul-smelling green slime bomb exploded beneath its feet! Instantly, it and several of its companions were transformed into "green slimes"! The croaking sound turned into a painful "grunt."
[Ding! Triggering the 'Resident Evil Slime Set'! Effects: Slimy, foul-smelling, slowed down! (System voiceover: Yue~)] 118 Commentary.
The second toad jumped aside in fright...
“Swish—bang!”
A rocket with a small flag tied to it screamed out from the ground, trailing a long trail of smoke, and accurately pierced its forehead! The toad held the rocket, froze in place, a look of confusion on his face.
[Ding! Triggering 'Social Death Package: Sky-High Monkey Crown'! Effect: Extremely insulting! Attached mental damage! (System plays the "Yi Jian Mei" background music)] 118 stifled laughter.
The third one was luckier, and the one it stepped on didn't seem to react? It just breathed a sigh of relief...
"boom!"
A nearby mine was triggered by its companion! This time there was a deafening bang and a flash of fire!
Even though it was a little far away, the shockwave still flipped it upside down! The mosaic on its belly was bulging!
[Ding! Triggering 'Easy Win Package - Neighbor Wang Has Done a Merit'! Effect: Indiscriminate AOE damage! Hit one and everyone else will suffer! (System applause)]
The remaining toads went completely crazy! They jumped around in panic in the "minefield," triggering all sorts of "surprises": multicolored smoke bombs (with a tear-jerking effect, even the toads cried!), itchy powder bombs (which made the toads start rubbing the ground frantically), and even one that sprayed super glue (which directly glued two toads together, staging a "life-or-death love story")...
The entire testing ground resembled a chaotic, absurd, and dazzling circus! Screams, explosions, shrieks of flying monkeys, and clouds of multicolored smoke… The scene was at once incredibly chaotic and… hilarious?
On the platform, everyone bit their tongues tightly, pinched their thighs, and their shoulders shook wildly! Their faces turned from red to purple and then to blue!
Emperor Nangong Yu:
[I…I can’t laugh…I’m the emperor…Puff…cough cough cough! This…this minefield…is so wicked! So…so talented! If Fuying stepped into it…the scene would be so beautiful…Puff!]
He covered his mouth tightly and his shoulders twitched.
The villain in Prince Nangong Chengqian's heart was already laughing so hard that he was crowing:
[Help… I can’t hold it anymore… The monkey is fucking the toad… Hahahaha! Is my aunt a demon?! This is more torturous than just blowing myself up!]
Dongfang Liezheng twisted his thigh hard, grimacing in pain:
[Hahahaha! Ahem! Ning'er... this... this trick of playing a prank on people... I'm convinced! I'm in awe!]
Queen Dongfang Qiwu and Lu Yaoer covered their mouths tightly with handkerchiefs, tears welling up in the corners of their eyes from laughing:
[This girl... is really...]
Nangong Ye looked at the chaotic scene in the arena, and then looked at the smug expression of the little woman beside him, who was admiring his artistic masterpiece. His icy face finally couldn't hold it anymore, and the corners of his lips raised in a noticeable arc.
His Ning'er can even fight in such a... unique way.
"The last one!"
Dongfang Yuning clapped his hands, signaling the guards to clean up the scene, mainly cleaning up those miserable toad heroes, and then showed an extremely "nuclear-kind" smile.
"Itchy Begging for Mercy Super Double Edition Pepper Spray! Test Subject—Bring it up!"
Several guards came up with three blindfolded, tightly tied, and shaking people.
It was the Fuying envoy who was imprisoned in the insect house and watched the old dog Yamamoto rot, and was tortured to the point of mental collapse!
The blindfold was roughly torn off. The glaring sunlight and the majestic Yan Kingdom's monarch and ministers before them made the three Fuying envoys collapse to the ground in an instant, tears streaming down their cheeks, and they kowtowed frantically for mercy:
"Mercy! Your Majesty, please spare me! Your Highness, please spare me! Your Highness, please spare me! Your Highness, please spare me!"
Dongfang Yuning walked up to them and looked down at these three Japanese who were once arrogant but now looked like mud.
In her hand, she held a pink and purple spray bottle with a tearful devil pattern painted on it, also in the shape of a cartoon.
[118! The ultimate social death segment is here! Give them a 'super double'!]
Dongfang Yuning sneered inwardly.
System 118:
[Beep! 'Social Death Judgment' activated! Target locked! 'Itchy Begging for Mercy Super Double' loaded! Host, please begin your performance! (System plays the "Tentative" background music)]
"Messengers,"
Dongfang Yuning's voice was sweet, but it was like the whisper of a devil.
"Thank you for coming all this way. I've developed a new, invigorating fragrance. Could you all... taste it?"
After she finished speaking, she didn't give the other person any time to react and pressed hard with her little hand!
"laugh--!!!"
A thick purple mist with a strange sweet fragrance was sprayed accurately on the faces and bodies of the three Fuying envoys!
"ah--!!!"
A scream so shrill that it didn't sound like a human voice instantly pierced the sky!
The three Fuying envoys suddenly jumped up from the ground like live shrimps thrown into boiling oil, but because their hands and feet were tied, they fell heavily to the ground again!
They twisted their bodies frantically, rubbing against the ground, the pillars, and even each other! Their faces, necks, and all the exposed skin turned red and swollen at a visible speed! They were covered with horrific scratches!
"Itchy! It itches so much! Help!"
"Kill me! Please kill me!"
"Baga! It's itchy! My bones! My bones are itchy! Ahhhh!"
"Snot! I can't stop crying! I can't see! Help!"
They rolled around wildly on the ground, their faces covered with tears and saliva. The extreme itching and the burning pain made them wish they could peel their skin off!
The miserable sight of him, with tears streaming down his face, distorted face, and madly wailing and rolling around, was a hundred times more miserable than the toad just now!
On the platform, everyone gasped! Looking at the three Fuying envoys who had instantly lost their human form, and then looking at the pink and purple spray bottle with a cute little devil painted on it in Dongfang Yuning's hand... a chill went from the soles of their feet to the top of their heads!
Awe! Incomparable awe!
How could this be pepper spray? This is torture from hell!
It's a gift from the devil! Killing people is the end of the world. This spray... makes life worse than death!
Emperor Nangong Yu silently lit candles for all potential enemies:
[…I take back what I said before. Ning girl isn't a firecracker, she's a walking deadly weapon! This spray… is too strong! Whoever dares to mess with her again…]
Crown Prince Nangong Chengqian shrank back in fear:
[Little... aunt...mighty...]
Dongfang Liezheng stood in awe:
[Hiss! This…this thing! It's even more cruel than lingchi! Ning'er…you…]
Nangong Ye looked at the miserable conditions of the three with cold eyes, without a trace of pity.
But when his gaze turned to Dongfang Yuning, it immediately turned into spring water:
[Ning'er is awesome! This spray is...really effective. No one will ever look at you like that again...]
He has already started thinking about mass production.
System 118:
[Ding! Social Death Trial KPI exceeded! Target Fuying Envoy: Mental breakdown index MAX! Regret value MAX! Host, your 'love education', they will probably never forget it! (System plays "Liangliang" BGM)]
The three Fuying envoys writhed in extreme pain and despair, their consciousness blurred, leaving only boundless regret:
【It's over! Fuying is finished! 】
"Why did we mess with this devil?! Why did we listen to that old fool Yamamoto?!"
[Yan Country has this divine being... no, this demonic god! I, Fuying... will never be able to turn things around! Your Majesty the Emperor... we were wrong! We shouldn't have come here!!!]
[This spray... is divine punishment! It's divine punishment!!!]
Dongfang Yuning looked at the effect, nodded with satisfaction, put away the little devil spray, clapped his hands, and just did a trivial thing.
She turned around and gave a sweet, harmless smile to the crowd on the stage, whose expressions varied, mostly those of suppressed laughter and awe.
"Brother-in-law, the weapons display is complete! Is the effect... okay?"
Emperor Nangong Yu took a deep breath, trying to calm his agitated mood, mainly because he was trying to hold back his laughter, and said loudly:
"More than just okay! These... ahem, lovely weapons developed by Princess Fuxing are incredibly powerful and ingenious! They are truly the nation's forte!"
In this battle, with Ning'er's help, our Yan Nation army will be even more powerful! The crushing of Fuying is just around the corner!"
He waved his hand:
"Prince Yong! Crown Prince!"
"Your younger brother (your son) is here!"
Nangong Ye and the prince stepped forward immediately.
"Initiate a mobilization immediately! In three days, the army will march! Target—the capital of Fuying! Let these ignorant Japanese pirates taste the wrath and love of our Yan Nation's lucky star!"
"Your Highness (son and subject) obeys your command!"
The voice was sonorous, full of the belief that one must win and a hint of deep sympathy for Fuying?
Dongfang Yuning clenched his fists excitedly:
[118! Did you hear that?! Three days later! Fuying Lunar Surface Project, launched!]
System 118:
[The host is mighty! Niuhulu Yuning has set out on his campaign, leaving no blade of grass untouched! Fuying Nation, your blessings... oh no, a crash landing on you and a sobering package are being delivered! Please sign for it (physical)! (The system plays the "Conquer" background music)]
Nangong Ye walked to Dongfang Yuning, took her hand very naturally, lowered his head and whispered in her ear, his voice was filled with a smile and a hint of imperceptible praise:
"Ning'er, are you using me as your tool well?"
Dongfang Yuning raised her little face, looking very proud:
"It's okay! But... considering your good performance..."
She stood on tiptoe and gave him a quick kiss on the cheek.
"Reward for you!"
The smile in Nangong Ye's eyes instantly spread, like ice and snow melting.
He held her hand tightly, interlocking their fingers.
[A tool? As long as I can be with Ning'er and watch her shine, I'm happy to do anything.]
The afterglow of the setting sun shone on the martial arts field, illuminating the pair standing hand in hand, as well as the three envoys in the distance who were still writhing in pain, wailing in regret for having brought a catastrophic disaster upon the Fuying Kingdom.
With the help of Princess Fuxing's cute yet deadly weapons, the Yan Kingdom's war machine was launched with a bang, targeting the small island country in the east that was ignorant of its own danger.
[Help Ying? Pray for good fortune? No, praying for a quick death is more realistic. Amen!]
System 118 silently crosses himself again
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