Chapter 40 Won't You Hug Me?
"Okay, don't cry."
Zhou Wangchuan said comforting words and stroked his hair, but his other hand was still in the quilt, rubbing his lower abdomen.
Shang Mu was both annoyed and frightened, glaring at the person before him through clenched teeth. He was weak and frail, even his sobs were feeble, tears continuously rolling down his jaw, making him look incredibly fragile.
Zhou Wangchuan gently wiped away his tears, but his other hand showed no intention of letting go and continued to massage his lower abdomen with professional techniques.
"Take it away." Shang Mu squeezed out two words from between his teeth.
Zhou Wangchuan knew that he had reached his limit. He also knew that he had been holding it in for too long and couldn't come out smoothly. He needed a little push.
"good."
Zhou Wangchuan spoke softly, loosely gripping it in his palm. The doctor's fingers were nimble and skillful, gently stroking and caressing the needle, like plucking a string to the moon, or writing with a brush. His movements were graceful and composed, his face a calm and composed expression.
Shang Mu's eyes were filled with anger and astonishment, and he looked as if he wanted to tear Zhou Wangchuan apart and chew him up. But he still used all his strength to endure it. His body was shaking violently, and the veins on his fingers were visibly brimming from the tight grip on the bed sheet.
But he ultimately lost the battle.
Two minutes later, Zhou Wangchuan achieved his goal, but Shang Mu was on the verge of collapse. He was so angry he forgot even to cry and just kept cursing. The pain from the wound weakened him, and after only a few minutes of cursing, he felt exhausted and could only shed silent tears and sob.
Zhou Wangchuan knew that it was better to let him have a good cry than to block him. So he just silently stroked his back and wiped his tears.
After Shang Mu cried enough, Zhou Wangchuan spoke: "Baby, you are just sick. Everyone needs someone to take care of them sometimes. This is a very normal thing. You are not alone. You can rely on me."
Shang Mu stared at him with red eyes, his voice weak and almost whispered, but still vicious: "Bastard."
Zhou Wangchuan smiled and said, "Yeah."
Shang Mu added: "I have already refused, you can't force me."
"But now you're sick," Zhou Wangchuan said. "You should listen to the doctor. Only then will you get better faster."
Shang Mu shed tears again: "You can't bully me."
"Okay, cry more to detoxify, and then have a good sleep after crying. You will be fine in a few days." Zhou Wangchuan stroked his cheek with one hand to wipe away his tears.
Shang Mu still held a grudge and sneered weakly: "So this is what you do every day at the hospital. You are such a good doctor."
Zhou Wangchuan laughed muffledly: "I don't usually do this. Didn't you say that caring for patients is the job of nurses and caregivers? Today is the first time."
Shang Mu didn't want to pay attention to him and closed his eyes: "Go away, I don't want to see you."
Zhou Wangchuan tucked the quilt in for him, slowed down the drip, and waited until he fell asleep before quietly leaving the ward.
After dredging, you still have to block, otherwise it would be an overreaction. Zhou Wangchuan understood what Shang Mu was thinking - Shang Mu wanted to maintain his decency and dignity in front of his lover. Although Zhou Wangchuan thought this was unnecessary, he still respected the other party's wishes.
So the next day at noon, Zhou Wangchuan hired a nurse.
The nurse was a warm and generous middle-aged woman named Zhong. She was healthy and strong, and she worked neatly and efficiently. She always had a bright smile on her face and spoke with full energy.
"It's so sunny outside, why are you drawing the curtains?"
With a rustle, the heavy curtains were drawn open, and the ward suddenly became bright.
Aunt Zhong's arrival softened Shang Mu's stern expression. He was still brooding over what happened last night. He and Zhou Wangchuan had been sulking for the entire morning, and now he could finally get rid of them with good reason.
Before leaving, Zhou Wangchuan said to him, "If you have any questions, please let Aunt Zhong contact me at any time. I'm on this floor."
Shang Mu said with a cold face: "Let's go quickly."
After everyone left, Shang Mu's tense breath slowly relaxed, and he said to Aunt Zhong, "Auntie, please help me get some water. I want to wash my hair."
He used to wash his hair every day, but today is the third day since he was hospitalized, and he really can't stand it.
Aunt Zhong was shocked. "Young man, this won't work! The doctor said you just had surgery and need to rest. Washing your hair will make you catch a cold and it will also cause the wound to rupture. You absolutely can't do that!"
She added, "Young man, I see your hair is very clean. Why do you need to wash it? Otherwise, how about I get a mirror to look at it for you?"
Shang Mu pursed his lips: "No need."
He knew that he was sick, thin, and haggard, with nothing to show for himself. He didn't even want to see the sun, and just wanted to shrink into a dark corner and slowly heal his wounds.
Fatigue came over him, the tears in the corners of his eyes slid onto the pillow, and he slowly fell asleep.
***
After receiving a call from Aunt Zhong, Zhou Wangchuan returned to the ward and tiptoed to the bedside. He saw Shang Mu sleeping soundly, his brows furrowed, perhaps because of the pain in the wound.
"You leave first." Zhou Wangchuan whispered to Aunt Zhong.
After everyone left, Zhou Wangchuan climbed onto the bed and held the person in his arms. Perhaps smelling a familiar scent, the sleeping person subconsciously leaned back, his body noticeably relaxing.
Zhou Wangchuan was afraid that he would unconsciously press the knife edge, so he held his wrist.
Shang Mu was half asleep, only feeling the pain from the cut. His nature told him to endure it, but a soft voice in his ear said, "If it hurts, tell me."
The voice was so gentle and so tolerant that he couldn't bring himself to refuse. So he let himself utter a small moan of pain.
About two hours later, Shang Mu slowly woke up. The aura around him was too familiar, and he knew the source of the voice in his dream. So, he subconsciously pursed his lips and asked, "Why are you here again?"
Zhou Wangchuan felt his tension, so he gently stroked his back and said, "Look at me."
Shang Mu raised his eyes to look at him and said angrily, "What are you doing?"
"I'm your boyfriend, and we've been together for over six years. We sleep in the same bed, eat together, and even shower together. We've both seen each other at our most embarrassing. We're very familiar with each other and are each other's best friends."
"so what."
Zhou Wangchuan said: "So, you can rely on me a little bit, don't force yourself, just tell me if it hurts, it's okay."
His voice was gentle, and as he spoke, he stroked Shang Mu's back soothingly.
Shang Mu stared at him with an unclear expression: "I'm embarrassed now, but you've always been an elite and have never been embarrassed."
Zhou Wangchuan said, "Does lying in the snow with you count? I've never done that before."
“Not really.”
Zhou Wangchuan thought for a moment and continued, "That time when I went to the hotel to pick you up, not only did you not go home with me, you even went out for a midnight snack with someone else. Does that count? That was embarrassing, wasn't it?"
Shang Mu was silent for a moment, then said, "...not really."
"That doesn't count?" Zhou Wangchuan laughed. "Well, okay—the day you wanted to break up with me, I drove around the riverbank a dozen times. My car ran out of gas, so I had to call a tow truck. In the middle of the night, I rode a shared bike to the gas station, with a giant wolfhound chasing me—that's embarrassing, right?"
"..." Shang Mu moved and said awkwardly, "Just make do."
"Look, being chased by a giant wolfdog is more embarrassing than having to cry out in pain from a wound, right?" Zhou Wangchuan rubbed the protruding shoulder blades on his back and coaxed him, "Don't bear it yourself, it will hurt me."
Shang Mu's stiff back slowly relaxed, and he buried his head in Zhou Wangchuan's chest, with broken cries of pain gradually escaping from his throat.
Zhou Wangchuan held him in his arms, pressed his warm palm against his back, and whispered a few words of comfort to him from time to time.
After a while, the pain subsided, and Shang Mu came out of his arms, his calm demeanor returning to normal: "I'm fine, you can go now."
Zhou Wangchuan said, "Sleep more these days to regain your energy. When you feel better, you can play with your phone for half an hour every day."
Shang Mu spent most of the next few days sleeping. He didn't want Zhou Wangchuan to take care of him in the ward, and only accepted care from Aunt Zhong.
A few days ago, Zhou Wangchuan could still hold him while he was asleep. But later, Shang Mu wouldn't let him touch or get close to him.
Every time Shang Mu woke up, he would coldly order him to leave. Zhou Wangchuan understood his concerns and only visited him when he was asleep.
Once, Aunt Zhong whispered to Zhou Wangchuan, "Xiao Shang is so cute and clean. Every day when he wakes up, he asks me to fetch water to wash his face. He also wants to wash his hair and wipe his body. I'm afraid he'll catch a cold, so I refuse. He also always asks me to change his bed sheets and pillowcases. What a particular boy!"
Zhou Wangchuan smiled and said, "It's a good thing to be clean."
Shang Mu fell asleep that day, but he still held his phone loosely. Zhou Wangchuan took the phone and placed it on the bedside. The screen lit up, revealing a page with search results.
"How many centimeters of scar will be left after gastric perforation surgery?"
There are several historical search records:
"What medicine can remove scars left by surgery?"
"Can laser remove scars?"
"Search for special scar removal medicine..."
Zhou Wangchuan looked at it for a while and silently turned off his phone.
After a while, Shang Mu woke up and saw him sitting next to him. He immediately frowned and asked, "Why are you here again?"
Zhou Wangchuan said, "You've recovered well recently. Didn't you want to wash your hair a few days ago?"
Shang Mu pursed his lips, paused for a moment, and asked coldly, "Really?"
Zhou Wangchuan said: "When have I ever lied to you?"
He went to get some hot water, helped Shang Mu move, let his head hang over the edge of the bed, and began to wash Shang Mu's hair.
Shang Mu was satisfied after washing it three times. Zhou Wangchuan wiped off the excess water droplets with a towel and then blew it dry with a hair dryer.
Shang Mu's mood obviously brightened up. He shook his soft, fluffy hair and stopped chasing Zhou Wangchuan away. He began to boss him around: "I want some water."
Zhou Wangchuan took a small half cup of warm water, held his shoulders and slowly fed him to drink, and couldn't help but touch his hair.
Shang Mu allowed himself to be touched this time, whereas he had not allowed any touching at all a few days ago. But now he only allowed patting his head, not hugging him, let alone kissing him.
During the time he was recuperating, Zhou Wangchuan didn't allow anyone to visit him, especially those from the company, out of fear that Shang Mu would be exhausted. Now that he saw that Shang Mu was in better spirits, he found some magazines for him to pass the time.
Cheng Yunxuan came several times, bringing nourishing soup cooked by the nanny, and sometimes a bouquet of flowers.
As Shang Mu's health gradually improved, he became more awake for longer periods of time and more restless. Finally one day, at his strong request, Zhou Wangchuan relented.
"You can take a shower, but the stitches haven't been removed yet, so you can't get wet. You can only wipe your body."
Shang Mu immediately said: "I don't need your help, I can do it myself."
Zhou Wangchuan frowned slightly and looked at him disapprovingly.
Shang Mu said, "Wait for me outside the bathroom. I'll call you if I need anything." He said in a firm tone.
Zhou Wangchuan couldn't persuade him, and he hadn't seen such an expectant look in his eyes for a long time, so he had to prepare hot water and a chair for him. After giving him repeated instructions, he left the bathroom.
In the bathroom, Shang Mu sat on a shower chair designed for patients, using shower gel and warm water to wipe his body. In order not to stretch the incision, he moved slowly and carefully.
By the time he cleaned himself up, an hour had passed and Zhou Wangchuan asked three times outside.
Shang Mu hesitated for a long time, and finally plucked up the courage to observe his body.
During this time, he felt low self-esteem and depressed, knowing that his illness had left him emaciated, ugly, and frail. He hadn't looked in a mirror since being hospitalized, and he didn't even dare to look at himself in the reflection of his phone screen.
He looked down at his body. To his surprise, he hadn't lost much weight. His waist and abdomen were still beautifully defined, with a few drops of water dripping down his waist. Aside from the thick gauze, there was no flaw. His legs were still slender, even more white from not seeing the sun.
He raised his head.
It was the first time he saw his own face in almost twenty days.
He wasn't as gaunt and deformed as he'd imagined; he was even more refined than before. His skin had become even paler from not seeing the sun all day, and with a slight loss of weight, the lines of his jawline were smoother and tighter. His eyebrows, long untrimmed, had grown thicker, taking on a wild, free-growing quality.
Shang Mu watched quietly for a moment, then scratched his hair. The dyed color was only on the tips, while the black hair at the roots had grown out, making his skin look even whiter.
Apart from the scar on his abdomen covered by gauze, he didn't seem to have become uglier.
There was a knock on the door, and Zhou Wangchuan's worried voice came: "Have you washed it? Is the wound okay?"
Shang Mu threw back the silk pajamas he was about to put on and sat there naked.
He said, "Come in."
Zhou Wangchuan pushed the door open and walked in, his eyes paused.
Shang Mu blinked: "I'm done."
"I saw it." Zhou Wangchuan closed the door behind him. "Why aren't you wearing any clothes? Are you cold?"
Having just regained his confidence from looking in the mirror, Shang Mu rediscovered his distant experience of acting like a spoiled child.
His voice was soft and innocent: "Won't you kiss me and hug me?"
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