Chapter 16 The Hot Potato of the Storeroom Key
The next morning.
Jiang Mianmian was awakened by a series of knocks on the door that sounded like a death knell.
"Your Highness! It's time for Your Highness to rise! The stewards of each household are already waiting in the courtyard!"
Jiang Mianmian painfully pulled her head out of the soft pillow, her hair a messy tangle, staring blankly at the dawning sky outside the window.
[What a terrible mistake... Why did I agree to that scoundrel of a housekeeper? Was I out of my mind? Or was I under a spell from that hotpot meal?]
Is this the fate of a corporate slave? Even though I've been reborn as a wealthy socialite, why do I still have to face the nightmare of waking up early and clocking in? I want to quit! I want to retire! I want to go back to being that useless lazy bum who just loafs around and waits to die!
Although she was internally screaming, Jiang Mianmian still managed to get out of bed like a zombie, thanks to her strong willpower (actually, her appetite) and the promises Shen Jin made last night about an "unlimited credit card" and "buying whatever you want to eat."
After a quick wash, she sat in the main seat of the main hall, with the heavy mahogany box from the previous night in front of her.
Before her stood a dense crowd of more than twenty managers, each holding an account book thicker than a brick, staring at her with a complex mix of anticipation and a desire to see a new broom sweeping clean.
Leading the group was the old steward of the Prince's mansion, Uncle Wang.
“Your Highness,” Wang Bo stepped forward respectfully and placed the stack of account books on the table, “These are the accounts of the Prince’s residence for the first half of the year, as well as the roster of the 326 servants in the residence, and the income details of the various estates and shops. Please take a look, Your Highness.”
Looking at the mountain of account books, Jiang Mianmian felt dizzy and her trypophobia was about to kick in.
"Look at them? What a load of rubbish! There are so many ledgers, I couldn't finish looking at them even if I looked until next year! And this is in traditional Chinese characters, vertical format! There's no punctuation! Is this trying to kill the illiterate?"
[Shen Jin isn't just making me a housekeeper; he's clearly trying to use these numbers to churn out my brain!]
She randomly flipped open a book and looked at the densely packed "how much money has come in and out," and felt a throbbing pain in her head.
If she were to follow the traditional housekeeping method, she would never be able to sleep in again; she would be exhausted just from checking these accounts every day.
no.
Absolutely not.
As a modern-day "lazy bum" with "lazy wisdom," she would never allow such an inefficient way of working to ruin her wonderful life.
Jiang Mianmian closed the ledger, took a deep breath, and her eyes instantly sharpened.
It seems it's time to give these feudal-era natives a little shock from modern corporate management.
"Uncle Wang." Jiang Mianmian leaned back lazily in her chair, tapping her fingers lightly on the table. "I'm too lazy to look at these account books."
The entire audience erupted in uproar.
The stewards looked at each other, thinking that the new queen was indeed a good-for-nothing, and was about to quit her job after only taking over?
Wang Bo was also stunned: "Your Highness, how... how can we know the household expenses and manage the servants if we don't look at this?"
Who says management requires micromanagement?
Jiang Mianmian sneered, took out a token from the box, and played with it in her hand. "From today onwards, our Prince's Mansion will change its rules. The old 'iron rice bowl' system is abolished."
"Change the rules?"
Amidst the puzzled gazes of the crowd, Jiang Mianmian had her maid bring paper and pen, and with a flourish, she wrote three bold, flamboyant characters—KPI.
“Ahem,” Jiang Mianmian pointed at the three strange symbols and said in a serious tone, “This is called ‘KPI’, a set of incentive systems created by this princess myself.
[Actually, it's a Key Performance Indicator. But it's hard to explain to you in ancient times, so let's just think of it as a hedonistic approach. As long as the money is right, everyone's happy.]
"Effective immediately," Jiang Mianmian stood up and began her "inaugural speech," "the Prince's Mansion will implement a 'base salary + commission' system. Everyone's monthly salary will be halved..."
"ah?!"
The crowd below instantly erupted in chaos.
"Half the amount? How can that be?" "The Princess is trying to cut our pay!" "We can't live like this anymore!"
What's the rush? You seem so naive. Don't you understand the principle of building suspense before emphasizing the positive?
"Silence!" Jiang Mianmian slammed her hand on the table, her aura overwhelming. "Let me finish what I have to say! Although my fixed monthly allowance has been halved, but—"
She held up one finger. "Let's set up 'performance bonuses.' For example, in the purchasing department, if you can buy the best goods with the least amount of money, you can keep 30% of the savings! In the kitchen, if you develop a new dish that the prince likes this month, you'll get a direct bonus of ten taels of silver! And for those in charge of cleaning, if you can keep the house dust-free for a month, you'll get double your monthly pay at the end of the month!"
The entire room fell silent.
Everyone's eyes lit up.
Thirty percent for myself? Ten taels of silver? Double the amount?
This isn't just skimping on money, it's practically giving it away!
“Not only that,” Jiang Mianmian continued, throwing out the bait, “we also implement a ‘last-place elimination system.’ Every month, we conduct assessments, and the top three performers get promoted and receive a raise, along with a letter of commendation personally signed by the Prince… uh, I mean, a letter of praise. The bottom three performers get their pay docked and are demoted, and those who rank last for three consecutive months are fired!”
"Of course, to prevent you from covering for each other or embezzling, I, the Princess, will set up an 'anonymous tip box.' Anyone whose tip is verified will be rewarded with half of the fine imposed on the accused for that month."
This series of combined punches left the managers dumbfounded.
Although they didn't understand what "base salary" or "performance-based pay" meant, they understood one thing:
If you do a good job, you can make a lot of money!
If you don't do a good job, you'll be fired!
They even came up with a mechanism for mutual supervision for them!
Uncle Wang held the paper covered in strange symbols, his hands trembling: "Your Highness... this... will this really work?"
"Whether it will work or not, we'll find out by trying."
Jiang Mianmian yawned and slumped back into her chair. "Alright, I've set the rules. You can draft the specific implementation details yourselves and submit them to me tomorrow. Don't bother me with these trivial matters anymore; I only care about the results."
"If there's nothing else, you may leave. This princess is going back to take a nap."
After saying that, she waved her hand and herded the group of managers, who were already full of enthusiasm, out like ducks.
Watching everyone's departing figures, Jiang Mianmian mentally gave herself a thumbs-up.
[Success! As long as you tie profits and responsibilities together, these people will spring into action like they're on steroids. That's the wisdom of capitalists! I just sit back and collect the money. That's called—making money while lying down!]
【Shen Jin, just wait and see your palace's efficiency double, while I... hehe, I'm going to eat roast duck in my dreams!】
...
In the corner.
A tall, slender figure stood quietly behind the screen.
Shen Jin was originally worried that Jiang Mianmian wouldn't be able to handle these seasoned veterans, so he came over after court to check on her and support her.
Unexpectedly, I witnessed such a wonderful "brainwashing conference".
"The Happy Party? KPIs?"
Shen Jin repeated these words in a low voice, a glint of light flashing in his eyes that he had never seen before.
Although her statements were unheard of and even somewhat unconventional (such as the money saved being given to servants), upon closer examination, they contained profound insights into human nature.
Drive efficiency by exploiting human greed, maintain discipline by exploiting human fear, and use human suspicion (the whistleblower box) to create checks and balances.
This approach is even more straightforward and effective than the so-called "imperial tactics" used in the imperial court.
And all this was just for... to take a nap?
"Your Highness," Yingyi behind him also looked shocked, "The Princess's method... seems unprecedented. Won't it cause chaos by letting the servants share the profits?"
"It won't be chaotic."
Shen Jin watched the figure rushing impatiently towards the bedroom, a playful smile playing on his lips. "People die for money, birds die for food. She's got this group's Achilles' heel."
"Pass down the order to fully cooperate with the Princess's 'new policies.' I want to see just how this 'happy faction' can turn the palace into something."
As it turns out, Jiang Mianmian's "modern KPI system" was simply a game-changer in ancient times.
Just three days later, the atmosphere in the Regent's Palace underwent a dramatic change.
In the past, servants would shirk their duties whenever possible, only sweeping the surface of the floor, and engaging in extortionate practices at every stage of purchasing.
Now?
The maids responsible for sweeping even dug out the dust from the cracks in the floor, making it so shiny it could be used as a mirror, all for that "double monthly pay." The purchasing manager, desperate for that 30% commission (scratch that, bonus), went to the market before dawn every day to hunt for the freshest, cheapest vegetables, haggling with the vendors until their spittle flew. Even the head chef in the kitchen was like a madman, researching new recipes every day, and almost blew up the kitchen for that ten taels of silver bonus.
The entire palace exuded an extremely eerie, bustling, and even somewhat overly "frivolous" atmosphere.
As the instigator of all this, Jiang Mianmian is currently lying on a deck chair in the garden, basking in the sun, holding a glass of chilled plum juice in her hand, and next to her is a plate of newly developed "milky steamed buns".
This is life.
Jiang Mianmian sighed, "[No need to look at the ledgers, no need to meddle in other people's business, and we still make a lot of money. These ancient people are so simple and honest; they work like crazy for just a little reward.]"
Just then, Shen Jin returned from court.
As soon as he entered the mansion, he noticed with keen insight that the stone lions at the entrance had been polished to a gleaming shine, even the balls in their mouths were polished to a reflective luster. The servants who passed by walked with a brisk pace, full of energy, and their voices when they greeted him were three octaves louder than usual.
This efficiency is even higher than that of his military camp.
Shen Jin walked into the garden and looked at the leisurely "hands-off manager".
"Your Highness has excellent methods."
Shen Jin sat down beside her, looking at the delicate little steamed bun in her hand. "I heard that in just three days, the expenses of the Prince's Mansion have not only not increased, but have actually decreased by 20% compared to previous months? Moreover, the efficiency of this operation is so high that even I am not used to it."
Jiang Mianmian opened one eye and chuckled:
"Your Highness flatters me. This is called 'management.' As long as the money is there, all the glass will shatter. We're all just here to work; talking about ideals is too abstract, talking about money is the most practical."
[So? Impressed? This is the brainchild of modern office workers! Even though I did it to be lazy, isn't the result satisfying?]
Shen Jin took a small steamed bun from the plate and put it in his mouth.
Rich in milk flavor, soft and delicious. This is probably the new creation of that chef who worked so hard for ten taels of silver.
"It really smells delicious."
Shen Jin swallowed the steamed bun, looked at Jiang Mianmian with deep eyes, "With such great talent as the Princess Consort, it seems a bit... a waste of her talent to only manage this small palace."
Jiang Mianmian's alarm went off.
What's wrong with your eyes? What do you want?
【I'm warning you, don't give me any more responsibilities! I'm only good at managing a household, not governing a country! Don't expect me to review your memorials! And don't expect me to manage the accounts in the Ministry of Revenue! My ambition is to be a couch potato, not a prime minister!】
Seeing her terrified expression that screamed "Don't come any closer!", Shen Jin couldn't help but laugh out loud.
He reached out and gently wiped a crumb from the corner of her mouth, his tone unusually gentle.
"Don't worry, I won't let you do anything else. It's just..."
He paused, then pulled out a more exquisite and intricate key from his pocket.
"This is the key to my private treasury."
Shen Jin placed it in Jiang Mianmian's palm, "Since you manage the palace accounts so well, then I'll also entrust my private savings to you to manage."
Jiang Mianmian stared blankly at the key in her hand.
Private vault?
That's the entire fortune the Regent had accumulated over many years! It's said to be worth more than a country!
[This means... they're handing over their entire fortune to me? Is this the legendary... handing over of their salary card?]
Oh my god, this is just too... too tempting! Managing money is a hassle, but counting it is so much fun! With this key, could I just bury myself in gold and sleep?
Jiang Mianmian gripped the key tightly, her smile even brighter than the sunshine from before:
"Your Highness, rest assured! I will definitely manage your private stash of money... cough cough, I'll make sure it generates some more money!"
[Actually: Hehehe, Shen Jin, your secret stash of money is now under the Jiang family's name! I'm going to invest it! I'm going to open a chain of hot pot restaurants! I'm going to become the richest man in the country!]
Shen Jin looked at her eyes, which had turned into the shape of gold ingots, and felt extremely happy.
He knew what she was up to.
But he didn't care.
He was even looking forward to seeing how many more surprises this little woman, whose mind was full of "making money" and "laziness," could bring him.
"Then... I'll leave it to the Princess."
Shen Jin said softly, his voice carrying a hint of indulgence and pampering that he himself was unaware of.
Under the sunlight, one of them smiled like a cat that had successfully stolen some fish, while the other smiled like a fish that had willingly been stolen.
This is not a "hot potato" at all; it's as if the Regent's Palace has been completely taken over by this "salted fish."
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