Chapter 12
Why don't you dance?
I looked at the message Echizen Ryoma sent me and fell into silence. Sister Xiong, who stayed with me to clean, saw that I looked a little unhappy and came over with a broom to show her concern for me.
"Nana, you look terrible, are you feeling unwell?"
I raised my head and said weakly, "Yes, I have a strange disease that makes me feel uncomfortable when I am on duty sweeping the floor. Sister Xiong, can you save me? For example, help me sweep the floor..."
Sister Xiong rolled her eyes at me and said, "Hurry up and sweep the floor. Don't be lazy."
Then he turned around and continued to wipe the blackboard, leaving me with only an indifferent back.
"What a cold-hearted woman..."
I sighed with emotion, but I felt relieved. Just as I was about to reply to Echizen Ryoma, Sister Xiong's voice came over, "If you really feel uncomfortable, don't force yourself."
I looked up in surprise. Sister Xiong was still wiping the blackboard with her back to me. The corners of my mouth curled up a little, and I jokingly said with a playful smile, "Our Sister Xiong really cares about me... Allah Allah, I'm just hungry... Yoshi! We need to finish cleaning quickly, and then after school, let's go buy some oden near the school!"
I quickly typed my answer—
I really like Fujiya's: They say that as you get older, your bones become harder. Dancing is a youthful occupation. I'm old, don't you understand?
[I really like Fujiya: Why are you asking me this question all of a sudden? You're so weird!]
Then I quickly turned off my phone and continued my duty with Sister Xiong, so I didn’t see his next reply:
[Echizen Ryoma: Your mother came to see me today.]
*
Perhaps motivated by the oden, Sister Xiong and I quickly finished our duty in just ten minutes. Since Sister Xiong and I lived in the same direction, we both bought some oden and ate it on our way home.
The two chatted casually, said goodbye at the fork in the road less than a hundred meters away from home, and went back to their respective homes.
I arrived at the entrance, about to enter the code to enter the house, when I saw a bouquet of flowers and a beautifully wrapped gift box next to the door. Although I was a little confused, I remembered that Aunt Huimei often sent me things, so I went in with the flowers and the box.
The flowers were a bunch of beautiful little chamomiles with tender yellow cores and pure white petals, in full bloom. I leaned in to smell them, and a fresh fragrance filled my nose.
Is it because I said before that I really liked that cactus that Aunt Huimei bought this bouquet of flowers?
But it's strange. After all, Aunt Huimei usually sent me some local handicrafts before, and rarely sent me a bouquet of flowers that looked like they were bought from a flower shop and were beautifully wrapped...
I was wondering when I suddenly caught a glimpse of a small card stuck on the edge of the bouquet. I picked it up and saw only two simple lines of words on it:
[Emi, no one was home when I came to visit today. I will visit another day.]
The signature is 'Masako Takahashi'.
She had finally found our address. I'd anticipated this day when I'd heard from Echizen Ryoma that she was looking for me. But when the moment finally arrived, all I could feel was panic and fear.
I dread the moment when I will see that woman again.
So with this fear in my heart, I immediately opened my phone and planned to tell Aunt Huimei about this matter, but the first thing I saw was Ryoma Echizen's words.
[Echizen Ryoma: Your mother came to see me today.]
[Echizen Ryoma: She told me a lot. She probably wanted to find you and make up for what she owed you over the years. She hoped you would continue dancing... I remember you used to love dancing, so why don't you dance now?]
Echizen Ryoma: Don't give me excuses like "I'm old and tough." You know deep down that's not the real reason.
Echizen Ryoma: ???
......
Later he sent me some messages asking why I didn’t reply to my message. I didn’t care at all. All I saw was “Your mother came to see me today”. A feeling of betrayal by a friend quickly filled my heart.
At that time, I was dominated by panic and fear and had no time to think too much. I just felt that it was Ryoma Echizen who leaked my address to that woman, and I felt very angry and wronged.
When I came to my senses, I was already curled up in the quilt, crying and calling Senior Cactus.
“Beep—beep—”
Hearing the voice coming from the other end of the phone, I suddenly woke up from my dream. I secretly cursed myself for looking for the other party, but I was also glad that he didn't answer the phone. When I was about to hang up the phone and use the excuse that I accidentally pressed the wrong button, the phone was connected first.
The moment the phone was dialed, his voice, always as gentle as spring breeze, came through the speaker -
He said, "Good evening, school girl."
He didn't say 'hello' or ask me what was wrong or why I suddenly called him. Instead, he said to me, "Good evening" as naturally as eating, drinking water and sleeping.
I took a deep breath, trying to calm my emotions that were suddenly overflowing for some reason. After a long pause, I replied dryly, "...Good evening, Senior."
He keenly sensed my sobbing voice and paused for a moment before saying, "Junior, do you have any worries you want to talk to me about? If it's you, I'm willing to be the perfect trash can... If you pour all your bad emotions in here, you'll feel a lot more relaxed."
Saying such words in such a tone...is really too unfair!
I was completely defeated and burst into tears on the other end of the phone without caring about my image.
"Wow, wow, wow, wow—"
“........”
Instead, he was frightened by my aura and became a little helpless. He mumbled something on the other end of the phone, but I couldn't hear him at all. In the end, he just let me cry.
I don't know how long it took, but I was tired of crying, and my rationality gradually returned. The huge sense of shame came over me again, so I started to make amends for myself.
"Senior, I just, I just read a very sad story... so I couldn't help it... and lost control of my emotions... I'm sorry to make you laugh."
You can see how embarrassed I am that your words are coming out.
Senior Cactus didn't expose my poor performance and excuses. Instead, he agreed seriously, "I see. So, does the junior want to share that sad story with me?"
Maybe his tone was so gentle that I really wanted to talk to him.
So I sniffed, wiped the tears from my face with the quilt, and then said, "But this story will be a bit long, senior, do you... mind?"
"Of course not."
*
The memories of living with my mother have become somewhat dim and unclear due to the passage of time.
My mother, Masako Takahashi, was an outstanding young dancer who showed a keen interest and talent for dance from a young age. My father, a conductor of an orchestra, was ten years her senior. They met at a musical when she was sixteen and quickly fell in love.
In the same year, she married my father. She dropped out of school in the first year of her marriage because she became pregnant with me. Later, in order to take care of me and my father, she hastily completed her studies and even had to interrupt her career. She devoted herself to taking care of my father and cultivating me.
But Masako Takahashi was a woman with a strong personality, and this strong personality gradually revealed itself after marriage. The incompatibility of their personalities and the disadvantages of the large age gap in their living habits also became more and more serious with the passage of time. So quarreling as soon as they met became the eternal melody of their relationship.
It can be said that my childhood was almost spent in constant dance practice and quarrels with my parents.
I started dancing at the age of three under the planning of my mother. At first, I learned the basic dance skills, such as stretching the legs, splits, kicking... If there were any movements that were not standard, I would be severely criticized and corrected by my mother. But as long as I won first place in the competition, my mother would show me a proud and satisfied smile.
I think the unhappy marriage and the shattered dreams have almost crushed this poor woman. Only when she sees me shine on the stage will she reveal such a sincere smile.
My mother always believed that I inherited her excellent genes and talents, but I was young and impatient and couldn't concentrate on studying dance. With a little training, I would be able to reproduce her former style.
It is said that when she was six years old, she had already made her mark in an international-level junior dance competition.
I really want to protect my mother's smile, but I know that I am not a genius, but a dull person. Everything I have achieved is because I have put in more effort and sweat than others. The dance steps that others can learn in an hour may take me half a day or even a whole day...
Just try a little harder... Just try a little harder, keep standing on that stage, and my mother will always have that smile on her face...
As a result, my arms and thighs were covered with large bruises year-round, and my legs were even more battered. One day, my father discovered the scars on my body, and this incident became the trigger for his divorce from my mother.
The divorce was awful, with the once-married couple practically fighting in court over my custody. In the end, because my mother presented strong evidence of infidelity, the court ruled that my father was at fault and awarded my custody to her.
My mother took me to the United States without saying a word.
I was six years old that year.
After more than a year in the United States, I couldn't even speak English well enough for daily communication. I had almost no friends and nothing else to do every day except dancing.
Once, she confidently signed up for a local dance competition for young people.
But I didn't even make it to the qualifying round.
The failed marriage with my father, the failed education she received from me and the humiliation she suffered in the competition dealt a heavy blow to this woman with a strong nature, almost to the point of being unable to recover.
She no longer controlled me, but locked herself at home and did not go out, watching the images of the glorious past day after day.
Her behavior made me feel extremely uneasy and guilty. If, if I could be smarter, more diligent, and dance as well as my mother, would that woman be better off?
If I were a genius who could make my parents proud, would they not separate?
If I weren't there, would my mother be able to stand on the stage again?
if.......
This went on for a long time, until one day——
I remember it was a sunny day. The American town in my memory was always rainy all year round and rarely had such sunny weather.
For the first time ever, my mother dressed up and took me to see a wonderful ballet performance.
After it was over, she told me with confidence that she was going to pursue her long-lost dream and get back what she had lost.
I don’t know how much her dream means to her, nor do I know how precious everything she has lost is, but I look at my mother’s long-lost smile and shining eyes.
I nodded.
It was from that day that my mother abandoned me.
*
After listening to my story, the person on the other end of the phone fell silent.
Perhaps thanks to having spoken out, my emotions gradually calmed down. I was about to say something soothing to put this matter behind me, but Cactus-senpai suddenly asked:
"So, does she really like dancing?"
I thought about it and answered very seriously: "No, I think she probably really hates dancing."
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