There was a casual coffee shop near where Ye Zhi had been scammed, and since I was in a hurry to get back to Dali, I chose this one because it was nearby. Inside, I ordered a chicken cutlet rice bowl, while Ye Zhi ordered pasta. We sat by the window…
Although the weather outside had cleared up, it wasn't like Dali, where it's spring all year round. So, I wasn't prepared and was only wearing a very thin jacket, while everyone else was wearing down jackets and cotton-padded coats.
I moved closer to the sunlight and started playing with my lighter.
Ye Zhi asked me, "Are you cold?"
"It's alright, it's just a short mealtime. The bus has air conditioning, so it won't be cold once you get on!"
Ye Zhi called over a waiter and ordered me a cup of hot milk. She asked me, "Are you planning to go back to Dali?"
I forced a smile and replied, "Whether the matter is resolved or not, we still have to go back... Why waste time here?"
Ye Zhi remained silent. After a moment, the waiter brought me a cup of hot milk. As I held it, a warm sensation spread through me, but I couldn't quite figure out if this was Ye Zhi's way of showing her affection for me.
I've always had a question: would a woman with a rather aloof personality like her ever warm a man's heart, or fall in love with one? But I couldn't bring myself to ask, because intuitively, I felt she was a woman who valued her privacy highly. We've known each other for quite some time, yet she's never told me anything about her past.
She finally spoke to me, saying, "I just texted you, thinking you wouldn't reply... I didn't expect you to come so quickly!"
To save face, I stubbornly replied, "I don't really want to talk to you... but let's keep things separate: professionally, we're enemies; privately, we're friends. I understand that."
"Your personality is quite good."
"Yeah?"
Ye Zhi smiled...
Music was playing in the coffee shop the whole time, but I didn't pay much attention to the first few songs. Then it switched to the theme song of a really popular Korean drama from a few years ago. I remembered the melody, but I forgot the name of the drama.
Ye Zhi listened intently.
I felt she had seen it before, so I asked, "Is this the theme song of which Korean drama?"
"You Who Came From the Stars".
I laughed and said, "You don't seem like someone who watches Korean dramas!"
Ye Zhi explained, "I saw it by chance, and I thought it was quite interesting, so I read it all."
"Yes... watching American dramas doesn't mean you have good taste, and watching Korean dramas doesn't mean you're vulgar. Anyway, the purpose is the same: to relax."
Ye Zhi glanced at me and replied, "It has nothing to do with entertainment, it just touched me a little." After a slight pause, she added, "Do you know why women like watching soap operas?"
"I don't quite understand your thinking."
"It's the same as how you men enjoy watching action movies; it's because you men have a hero complex deep down, wanting to conquer others. Women, on the other hand, crave protection, especially when we're not yet psychologically mature, this need is even stronger... For some women, having a male lead who protects them like in a soap opera is a particularly beautiful fantasy, but very few women have actually had such a man appear in their lives... So women's love for soap operas might be to satisfy this psychological need, or it might be because of memories."
"Now I understand... So, you're the latter?"
"That happened a long time ago."
"But you still seem to be holding a grudge."
"Maybe."
Ye Zhi picked up her cup and took a sip of coffee, but my curiosity was piqued by her, so I said to her again, "Tell me about it, otherwise I'll always think you're otherworldly, like you fell from the sky, and that the mundane world has nothing to do with you!"
Ye Zhi smiled and finally spoke, "We were high school classmates. He was very good to me... In our senior year of high school, his father was punished for embezzlement and bribery, and his mother couldn't bear the pressure of public opinion, so she took him and left Shanghai; later I also went abroad to study, and we completely lost contact... I haven't heard from him all these years, and I don't know how he is doing now."
"That's too perfunctory. How exactly is it good?"
"There's not much to say in detail, it's just like how it's portrayed in TV dramas."
"Have you started dating too early?"
Ye Zhi looked at me with a strange expression and replied, "He left me a note when he left, asking me to wait for him... Does that count?"
Hearing the word "wait" suddenly weighed heavily on my heart. It was as if I were witnessing two extreme forms of love: Ye Zhi and that boy's was dreamlike, like something out of a movie; while Lu Jia and I were realistically heartbreaking, with no promise of waiting or being waited for between us. Or perhaps, all these years, she had been waiting for me, but I hadn't taken it to heart because of the burdens of life.
Perhaps it was this stark contrast that fueled my desire to investigate further. After lighting a cigarette, I asked her, "Before he left the note, were you in a romantic relationship?"
"Back then, I didn't understand what love was."
"And then what happened after he left the note?"
"I still don't quite understand love... but I want to wait a little longer."
At this moment, I seem to see Ye Zhi, who is locked up by the word "waiting." She is a persistent and calm woman, which is why the word "waiting" can lock her up so firmly. But someone like me can't be locked up. The only thing that can lock me up is life... Because after experiencing all this, I have become indifferent to love. In my eyes, living for life is the most practical thing, so I reject everything related to dreams.
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