The night deepened, but the streets became increasingly crowded. Peach and I were lost in the throng, exchanging silent glances... However, I could sense the desolation in her heart. A woman would not sell her treasured bags and jewelry unless absolutely necessary.
After another group of people walked past us, Taozi finally spoke to me and said, "You know how difficult things are for Tienan right now. As the person closest to him, if I don't help him share the burden, who will?"
"He was just too hasty..."
"Isn't his anxiety all for our future? No matter what the final outcome is, I won't blame him."
I was speechless for a moment, but I was deeply moved by Taozi's selfless dedication. She and Wang Lei were really alike; once they got serious, they were both so reckless, yet the world had so many misunderstandings about them...
I didn't want to say anything blaming her, so I just asked her in a softer tone, "How much money do you still need?"
Peach replied casually, "It's not much of a difference."
I did some mental calculations: if Jiulongju's business could reduce costs to the minimum, how much extra money could it make? After calculating the result, I said to Taozi, "I'll give you 20,000 yuan first. I don't know how much it will help... but you must accept it."
"No need... I already feel guilty for not being able to help you with your business at Jiulongju, how could I possibly take your money!"
I didn't say much to Taozi, but transferred 20,000 yuan to her via WeChat. Then I grabbed her phone and forced her to accept it. To avoid making her feel guilty, I smiled at her to reassure her. But Taozi was still very worried and asked me, "You're short of money too, aren't you? Now that you've given me so much, won't the shortfall be even bigger?"
“The landlord of the shop I rented in Jiulongju didn’t ask me for rent. He wanted to get involved and take a share of the profits, so my pressure wasn’t so great… Otherwise, I really wouldn’t have any extra money to give you.”
"Hmm...Are you sure you can handle this? You absolutely mustn't make a mistake that leads to a loss!"
To avoid worrying Peach, I deliberately exaggerated, saying, "I'm at least 90% sure."
"That's good... I believe you can succeed this time... You're different from Tie Nan; you think before you act, while he just acts on passion..."
I smiled and said, "I talked to Coach Ma before... Actually, Tie Nan has changed quite a bit compared to before; you don't know, when he first came to Dali, he was completely in a state of just loafing around and waiting to die... Now, whether it's impulsive or not, at least he has the awareness to work hard for the future... For a man like Tie Nan, this is definitely a remarkable growth!... If he really makes the right bet this time, your life in Dali will have a future... Haha, I think you are a woman who can change him, and he has changed you... Really, this feeling of changing each other for a better life is really great... Really!"
In the end, I became somewhat incoherent, because I was reminded of the loneliness I had endured... I didn't know what those three years with Lu Jia really meant. At this moment, my heart was filled with desolation...
I suddenly gave up the idea of going back to Shanghai to see Ye Zhi. It wasn't that I didn't care about her enough... it was just that I was touched by certain feelings and scenes, and going back to Shanghai would be like asking for trouble.
My most pressing task right now is to make a name for myself in Dali.
I pulled out a cigarette and lit it, thinking that letting go of this thought would make me feel better, but unexpectedly, the feeling of irritability increased even more.
Suddenly, Peach asked me without warning, "I want to ask... where is that woman who could change you now?"
I paused for a moment, then laughed and replied, "Someone as perfect as me... do I really need to change?... Don't joke with me."
"Is it a bit corny to say 'only you know how it is'?... But that's what I'm trying to say..." After a slight pause, Peach said to me meaningfully, "Michael, your current mindset is wrong... You really can't go on like this... Unless you think you haven't missed out on enough women!"
I don't know what you mean by that.
This time, Peach retorted bluntly, "You missed out on Wang Lei, and now you've missed out on Sisi... Don't you feel any regret at all?... Or is it that only realistic women like Lu Jia are the ones you can't forget?... You don't know how to cherish the women who are truly devoted to you?... If that's the case, then everything you're suffering now is your own doing!"
"It's not what you think... It's precisely because I've been through these three years with Lu Jia that I've come to loathe this kind of fruitless love even more... Before, I always thought that the most important thing in love was the process... But at this age, I've truly come to understand... that the outcome is perhaps more important... because you can't bear the same pain a second time."
"If you're not even willing to accept the process... then isn't talking about the outcome pointless?"
I exhaled the smoke heavily, not wanting to argue with Peach anymore.
While I remained silent, Peach received another phone call. Judging from her conversation with the other person, it was probably another call to buy something from her... Sure enough, after ending the call, Peach deliberately avoided me and went to the place the woman had arranged to meet her...
Almost in the blink of an eye, I found myself surrounded by strangers on the bustling street, not a single one of whom I knew. The feeling of loneliness crept in, making me think that in all of Dali, in the entire ancient city, there was no one more depressed than me.
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