The small room, through the window, reveals a vast world; I don't know when it started, but finally a light came on in the distant buildings, and soon the streetlights came on too. As if suddenly, the streets became crowded, with people hurrying by and all kinds of vehicles. The streets are not long, but they are the way home... And behind those thousands of windows are their homes; I wonder what kind of feelings they have as they return to that place called home.
After a moment of this daze, I finally let go of Yang Sisi, who was hugging me. We looked at each other... I was back to normal, but Yang Sisi still had tears on her face, as if she had suffered a great trauma.
I wiped her clean, then asked, "Weren't you in Shanghai? How come... you're back?"
"If you've built a pigsty and raised a troublesome pig...wouldn't you need to check on it morning and night?"
"I thought your actions would be as stubborn as your words... but you still came back."
“If you hadn’t been hit by the car, I really wouldn’t have come back… I had even signed up for yoga classes.”
Now that you mention it, I don't know whether it's a good thing or a bad thing.
"This is definitely a bad thing for you... but for me... it's a good thing... You probably can't fight back right now..."
I looked at Yang Sisi with great wariness, and she said with a half-smile, "Don't worry... I won't take advantage of you... but I do feel quite superior... I can walk, and I can jump... I just hopped up the stairs..."
I interrupted, "Come on, people will think you're crazy."
"Then I'll dance for you... You're not just anyone."
As Yang Sisi spoke, she tied her loose hair up with a hair tie, then got out of bed and started doing a very trendy dance for me... At first, I felt quite uncomfortable, but as she danced, I couldn't help but laugh...
I was laughing at her; she was crying her eyes out just a moment ago, and now she has a completely different face... Actually, I quite envy her personality. Good times are fleeting, bad times are fleeting, and she never makes things too difficult for herself. On the other hand, I live too seriously, trying to figure everything out, but the results are often not what I want.
Yang Sisi finally stopped to rest. She was hot, and while fanning her face, she said to me, "How about it? Are you almost driven crazy by my two nimble long legs?"
"You're just hurting others without benefiting yourself... In this sweltering summer heat, aren't you afraid of getting dehydrated from all that jumping around?"
"I have all four limbs intact. If I'm dehydrated, I'll just go find some water to drink."
"Are you deliberately trying to upset me?"
"Go ahead and hit me... I'll take a step back, and if you can hit me, you win."
As Yang Sisi spoke, she leaned against the wall and looked at me with a particularly provocative gaze... I just assumed she was joking.
So I didn't argue with her... I calmly said to her, "I have a question for you. You've been emptying the urinal under my bed these past two days, haven't you?"
What are you saying?
"Did you empty the urinal under my bed?"
"Can you stop being so disgusting? Do I look like someone who empties a chamber pot for others? Growing up, my parents never let me touch cold water... Why would I touch something so disgusting!?"
"You are quite delicate... but you don't look like it."
Yang Sisi walked back to the bedside, then leaned close to me and asked, "Does someone really empty your chamber pot?... Have you gotten involved with some girl again, fallen head over heels in love, and is she willing to do anything for you?"
"What nonsense are you spouting?"
"If there really is such a person, you should hurry up and marry her... What a wonderful girl!"
"Stop being sarcastic."
Yang Sisi was silent for a moment, then said to me seriously, "Let's stop joking around here... Can you tell me why you got so angry just now..."
"I don't know how to start the conversation."
Yang Sisi looked at my hand and then said, "I'll go downstairs and buy some medicine to treat your wound... You should also think carefully about how to bring it up with me... I'd really like to know."
After saying this, Yang Sisi glanced at me again and then left the ward.
...
After she left, I lit a cigarette, leaned against the wall, and took puffs from the left and right... During the process, I went through all the people who had come to see me and all the things that had happened in the past two days...
In this light, this small hospital room is also a world. People come and go from here, bringing me warmth and coldness of human relationships, and affecting my mood.
Right now, the biggest problem I face is not how much longer I have to stay in the hospital, but how to properly handle this painful relationship between myself and Lu Jia... It shouldn't be difficult, but once my family gets involved, things immediately change.
I'm really worried. Although Lao Mi and I have been arguing a lot, when it really comes down to it, I can't ignore his and my mom's feelings.
...
After finishing a cigarette, Yang Sisi returned shortly afterward with a plastic bag. She sat down beside my bed and meticulously cleaned my wound with medicine, while I remained silent, displaying utter masculinity...
This time, I took the initiative to say to Yang Sisi, "Lu Jia came back...did you know that?"
"Know."
"Um."
"Go on..."
"We're done... Be gentle, it hurts!"
"There's something dirty inside the wound, I have to get it out for you... You've held back for so long without making a sound, don't break your composure."
I closed my eyes and let Yang Sisi clean my wounds with a very strong medicine...
Yang Sisi then said to me:
Why did you guys lose your chance?
The same thing can have different answers in different people's eyes. I wanted to know how Yang Sisi viewed me. Besides, I didn't want to create two sets of standards for the same thing, so I used the exact words I used to say to others: "I made a mistake... When I was in Jimo, I did something I shouldn't have done with a woman... That woman sent our photos to Lu Jia... No woman can stand that, so we're over!"
Yang Sisi looked at me, stopped what she was doing, threw the cotton swab on the ground, and glared at me, saying, "Say it again."
"I'll say it again and it'll still come to the same result... I'm just a man who can't stand being alone! ... It's not just me, men who have been single for a long time will always have physical needs... Women are the same, it's just human nature."
(End of this chapter)
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