Before I knew it, it was already 12:30 in the morning. People ordering late-night snacks at this time are either drinking or too lonely to sleep... Dealing with these people makes me feel like I've entered another world, half of it bright and bustling, half of it cold and lonely.
That's what delivering food is like. After seeing so many different kinds of people, you develop a God's-eye view, ignoring all joys and sorrows, but you can see the coldness in your own heart.
At 1:30, things finally quieted down again.
I bought a can of beer from the barbecue stall across the street, paired it with the cigarettes in my pocket, and it felt like my restless loneliness had found its home—a feeling I was actually craving…
Yang Sisi is right. I do feel like the whole world has wronged me when I light a cigarette and hold a can of beer.
Why can't someone as talented as me get what I want?
In his resentment, he suddenly thought of detaching himself from worldly desires and becoming a Buddha on the spot. He then felt a sense of pleasure, believing that his spiritual level was superior and that he could ignore loneliness and enjoy solitude.
Time was wasted little by little, but in reality, these thoughts or feelings were meaningless because my level of understanding was not improved at all; I was still an ordinary person, as ordinary as could be.
I miss my parents, I miss my friends who have passed away, and I long for a beautiful girl who can sleep with me and spend the long nights together.
...
At two o'clock, I finally finished my night shift. Instead of going back to rest immediately, I ordered fried rice and some random skewers from a barbecue stall near the mountain and water area.
The physical hunger made me very focused. From the moment the boss brought me my food, I kept my eyes glued to the food until I finished eating.
When I was about to pay, the owner told me that someone had already paid for me.
I looked around and saw the woman I was supposed to call An'an sitting at the table behind me... I was quite surprised.
She smiled, then spoke to me first, saying, "We seem to have a special connection; I've been wanting to invite you to dinner for a while now..."
I smiled and said, "Thank you, thank you... I just got off work, what brings you here...?"
"I couldn't sleep, so I thought I'd go out for a drink... but after wandering around for ages, the only thing still open was the barbecue stalls."
I just nodded. Since we weren't very familiar with each other, I didn't know how to respond... so I decided to say goodbye and leave.
She seemed a little hesitant, but before I could speak, she said to me, "If you have time, could you have a few drinks with me?"
"Well……"
"If you want to refuse, that's fine. I know you've been busy all day and are very tired... Go home and rest early."
I sensed this woman was a bit down, and out of pity, I pulled up a stool and sat down opposite her. I said, "There's still time for a few drinks... but you'll have to go early."
Go back to sleep, it's already very late! […* …&Free Reading]
"I'm fine... Anyway, I don't have to work, so I can sleep in as late as I want tomorrow."
"That's true, but it's not good for a woman's skin if she always stays up late."
She glanced at me, didn't respond, then picked up her glass and drank the wine inside.
I had a drink with her too, but it was quite awkward because we ran out of things to talk about as soon as we sat down... To be honest, her personality is a bit like Ye Zhi's. Although she's not as aloof as Ye Zhi, she's also not a woman who likes to make small talk.
After a moment of silence, she changed the subject and said to me, "I don't think you're like most food delivery people."
"Why?"
"You have a kind of dignified and humble demeanor... which makes people very willing to treat you as an equal... I don't know if I'm right?"
"No job is superior or inferior... Although food delivery is a service industry, it is also our duty to benefit others, so why should we feel inferior?"
"But in reality, many food delivery workers feel like they are the kind of people who have been eliminated by society... They look at others with a lack of confidence."
I smiled and replied, "But seeing them braving the wind and rain, everyone who enjoys their service still has great respect for them... I think there's a lack of honest communication between people these days... If everyone who orders food could say thank you to the delivery guys afterwards and express their respect, they would definitely feel good about themselves."
"You said the delivery guys are them... hasn't it already been exposed?"
I laughed.
She shrugged and said, "From what you're saying, it seems like you regret the lack of honest communication between people... but you're one of those who refuse to communicate."
"Haha... I always thought you didn't like to talk, but I didn't expect you to be so eloquent when you actually start chatting."
"We're bored, so we have to talk about something."
I nodded, feeling much more relaxed, because she was willing to take the initiative to start a conversation, so I didn't have to put in too much effort... Actually, she and Ye Zhi are different. She is cold on the outside but warm on the inside, while Ye Zhi's heart is cold... Because except when she is in a relationship, she rarely smiles, but I really want to see her smile.
These are all obsessions in my heart. I would compare her to other women, and I would imagine what it would be like if she did things that she couldn't do.
After being in a daze for a while, I finally spoke to An'an: "I really don't see delivering food as a means of making a living, so I'm quite relaxed about it... I also enjoy the process because I can meet different people every day, which is like choosing my life all over again... You know, once you fall into your own life trap, it's very depressing... So, delivering food is also a kind of self-breakthrough and salvation."
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