Chapter 17: Ranpo exposes her true identity in front of the club president...
"I'm back! The world's number one detective has solved another case. Those people are so stupid. They made me explain things that were obvious at a glance. It was so annoying! And walking is so tiring. The president isn't around, so I don't even have an appetite for sweets. Ranpo-sama worked so hard on this case!"
Edogawa Ranpo's childish boasting and complaining voice came from outside the door, making me feel sorry for President Fukuzawa. It must be really tough for the president to have such a grown-up child at home!
Although Ranpo spoke first, it was Yosano Akiko who entered first. She was a year younger than Ranpo and looked as mature as his older sister.
The woman wearing a butterfly hair ornament bowed respectfully to Fukuzawa Yukichi and said, "President, I have brought Ranpo back."
"You've worked hard, Yosano." President Fukuzawa's serious voice was genuinely sincere. I completely understood his feelings because Ranpo was really too difficult to manage. I could imagine how hard Yosano Akiko must have worked because of Ranpo's willfulness.
She really helped Fukuzawa a lot; with a detective helping to share the burden of taking care of Ranpo, the president was able to relax a lot.
Before he could speak to Yosano Akiko, Edogawa Ranpo walked in and continued complaining, "I told you, I'm the one who's having the hardest time. I hate walking, especially such long distances. And those cheap snacks from the countryside don't even taste good. They're awful..."
"You've worked hard too, Ranpo."
President Fukuzawa's dignified yet gentle voice immediately stopped Ranpo from complaining. He happily pulled down his hat brim slightly and said casually, "It's alright." He looked quite cute. As expected of a recognized president-obsessed person, Ranpo really admires the president.
"This is my student Yoriichi Tsugikuni, whom I took in yesterday. This is a song."
President Fukuzawa introduced Yoriichi and me to the two detectives once again. I also meowed on the president's lap to fit the occasion. Then I noticed that Yosano Akiko's gaze had changed, and they both had an expression of complete disbelief.
That's true. It's really unbelievable that such a serious person as the president would have a cute cat on him!
Ranpo took off his hat and quickly walked to President Fukuzawa, squatting down beside him. His always-curved eyes widened, revealing sparkling green eyes, and his boyish voice was full of anticipation, "It's my turn, I want to touch it too."
President Fukuzawa looked at Ranpo, who was leaning close to him like a puppy, and assumed that he also wanted to pet the cat. He gently removed his hand from my head and reminded him, "Touch me gently, don't scare Uta."
"Who wants to touch her?" Edogawa Ranpo looked at me with disgust, then looked up at President Fukuzawa and said matter-of-factly, "It's the president who should touch my head. You can't be biased."
I, who was initially indifferent, began to have a bad feeling. Fukuzawa Yukichi, upon hearing his words, paused slightly, reached out and patted Ranpo's head, saying helplessly, "Why are you still concerned about this?"
"How could I not care?! The president is willing to pat her head, so of course he should pat mine too."
Edogawa Ranpo puffed out his cheeks and emphasized, feeling President Fukuzawa's hand touch him twice and about to withdraw, so he immediately pressed his hands down on top of his head, looking like he was demanding fairness.
"The club president has been touching the song for so long, he should touch me a little longer too, otherwise I'll be at a huge disadvantage."
Hearing Ranpo's childish words, I initially thought my true identity had been exposed, but seeing that he was simply vying for attention, I immediately relaxed. I knew it! Even the most brilliant detective is still just a normal person; he couldn't possibly see through my disguise.
As I was happily watching the heartwarming scene between the president and Ranpo, the young man who looked exactly like a teenager looked at me with his green eyes and said with considerable disdain, "You're not a real cat. Get off the president now. Do you want people to think that the president is a lolicon like the newly appointed Port Mafia boss?"
Ranpo's words made my cat fur stand on end—this is illogical! My transformation technique is flawless; even if Edogawa Ranpo, as an ordinary person, were incredibly skilled, he couldn't possibly see through my disguise so easily! Why did he figure it out? I didn't reveal a single flaw!
"...The song...isn't about a cat...it's about a girl?!"
President Fukuzawa's incredulous and conflicted voice came from above. I then noticed that his previously relaxed breathing had become labored; it seemed he had come to believe Ranpo's words. Of course, the president had considerable trust in Ranpo's exceptional intelligence, his ability to instantly see through the truth.
Yoriichi, who had been quietly watching the chessboard, spoke calmly at this moment, "I said yesterday that the song is by a girl."
The president's expression at that moment was hard to describe. He probably wanted to kick this newly accepted apprentice out again. Everyone else was a troublemaker, but he was a troublemaker for his teacher without any mercy.
Since I couldn't hide it any longer, I readily dispelled the transformation spell.
With a burst of white smoke from my body, I transformed back into the appearance of a seven-year-old girl and sat on President Fukuzawa's lap. I then felt his muscles tense up, and he looked at me with an expression of utter alarm.
It's understandable; a person as upright and dignified as the president would naturally be extremely averse to being seen as a lolicon like Mori Ōgai! And now, a loli is sitting on his lap—it's practically damaging his reputation!
To comfort President Fukuzawa's wounded heart, I meowed at him cutely, which immediately made the president, who was watching me, frown and his expression become extremely scary, the kind that would frighten a child.
I wasn't flustered at all. I tilted my head cutely and said in a clear, sweet voice typical of a little girl, "I also want to be the president's student. Please take me as your apprentice."
President Fukuzawa remained silent, but his expression grew even more terrifying.
Knowing that the president's expression becomes more serious when faced with cute things, I immediately put my hands together, blinked my starry eyes, and pleaded in an incredibly cute manner, "Please! Let me be your student!"
President Fukuzawa stared at me with his green eyes, looking extremely stern, but he decisively said "Okay," allowing me to successfully become his apprentice.
"Yay! I love the president the most!" I happily hugged him and shouted. I immediately felt that President Fukuzawa's body stiffened, and he seemed very uncomfortable with my coquettishness.
The president quickly placed me on a tatami mat to the side, and seemed to breathe a sigh of relief before emphasizing, "Don't you dare pounce on me again."
"Can I turn into a cat?"
I asked this question on purpose, and sure enough, I saw the president struggling with the dilemma. Being a cat lover but not wanting to be called a lolicon is definitely a very difficult choice for the president!
While I was still secretly chuckling to myself, Edogawa Ranpo, who was obsessed with the company president, grabbed me by the back of the collar and lifted me off the ground. "Are you deliberately teasing the president?"
Of course I wouldn't admit it, and I thrashed my short legs and shouted, "Shameless! Such a big person is bullying a little kid like me!" Even though Ranpo, who was nineteen years old at the time, was no more than six years old in his heart, I still shouted with righteous indignation.
Seeing me being bullied, President Fukuzawa immediately ordered, "Ranpo, let the song go! She's still a child."
"Hmph! How can she be considered a child?" Ranpo puffed out his cheeks and refused to let go, while I was extremely conflicted. Could it be that this guy even knows my real age?
This world full of superpowers is really unscientific! The most unscientific thing is Ranpo, an ordinary person who is even more powerful than superpowered people!
Just then, Yoriichi, who had been quiet all along, appeared beside Ranpo, a wooden sword pressed against Ranpo's neck.
"Put down the song!"
What if I don't let go?
I'll hit you!
"You don't like hitting people, so why did you hit me?"
"You're bullying Ge."
"She's not nice to the president."
"The song is very good for the teacher."
"That's not good at all! She's deliberately teasing the club president!"
"Ge likes the teacher and even snuggles into the teacher's arms when he sleeps."
"Enough! You two!"
Fukuzawa Yukichi, whose reputation was once again damaged, interrupted the two children’s childish argument with a loud shout. His powerful aura seemed to materialize into a physical attack, even causing the glass to tremble.
Realizing he had angered the president, Edogawa Ranpo immediately put me down and obediently knelt on the tatami mat, acting as if nothing had happened.
When Yoriichi noticed that his teacher was angry, he obediently knelt down next to Ranpo and listened to the reprimand with his head down.
I quickly sat down next to them, looking very well-behaved.
As the one who triggered this, I'd better behave myself. I've been inexplicably accused of being a lolicon, just like my scumbag junior, Mori Ōgai. No wonder President Fukuzawa is furious.
By the way, do I snuggle into the president's arms when I sleep? I have absolutely no recollection of it, which is such a shame!
A note from the author:
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