Chapter 2002 Identity Crisis
The Du family lives in Taoyuan Village, ten miles away from Qingyuan County. It is backed by Taoyuan Mountain and surrounded by a stream. It is nestled between mountains and water, and the scenery is pleasant.
Du Qingtang walked to the entrance of the village and saw two people coming out from the side path, carrying firewood taller than them, talking and laughing.
"Hey, isn't this Tang Ge'er? Are you back from the city?"
Du Qingtang hesitated for a moment before recognizing the person: "Well, Uncle Bao and Uncle Chen went to the mountains to collect firewood?"
"It's cold now. I can pick some up to heat my kang and sell them for a little money."
"Hey, Tang Ge'er, Uncle Chen wants to ask you something."
Du Qingtang: "You say."
"I've seen your cousin walking with a girl several times." Uncle Chen winked. "Tang'er, is your aunt planning to arrange a marriage for your cousin?"
Uncle Bao joked: "Looks like you'll have a cousin-in-law soon, Tang'er."
Du Qingtang: "...I haven't been to my aunt's house for a long time, so I don't know."
Uncle Chen gave up with regret: "Forget it if you don't know. Go back quickly and don't let your mother and sister worry."
Du Qingtang nodded and walked past the two of them towards home.
Uncle Chen and Uncle Bao were behind her, speaking in low voices.
Uncle Bao: "Yuan Sheng is well educated, she is definitely not a girl from an ordinary family."
Uncle Chen: "How could a girl from a respectable family have a secret meeting with Yuan Sheng at night? This is outrageous!"
Uncle Bao: "Huang Tongsheng from the next village said that Yuansheng will definitely pass the exam and maybe even go one step further and become a high-ranking official in the capital. As long as he can become an official's wife, what does a secret meeting at night mean?"
Uncle Chen: "That's right. We farmers are no match for the officials."
Uncle Bao: "If you are really curious, I have an idea for you. When Tang Ge'er comes back from the city, Yuan Sheng will probably come back too. Then you can hide near the Yuan family and you will definitely get something."
Uncle Chen: "Good idea!"
Du Qingtang's eyes dimmed slightly, and he put the two people's plans behind his mind and stopped in front of three yellow mud houses standing side by side.
This is the Du family's house. From west to east, there are Du Qingtang's room, Yuan's mother and daughter's room, and the kitchen.
The light was on in the kitchen. Du Qingtang pushed open the door and saw a woman's face.
He was sallow and thin, with fine lines dotted around the corners of his eyes, and his frosty white hair was full of vicissitudes and haggardness.
The woman, who was not yet forty, looked like she was in her fifties or sixties.
"Is Tangge'er back?"
Du Qingtang was a little dazed. How long had it been since she last saw Yuanshi?
Five years or ten years?
At this moment, a voice questioned me: "Why are you back so late? Your coat is covered in mud. Did you roll around in the fields?"
Only then did Du Qingtang realize that there was someone behind Yuanshi.
She had a dark complexion, a broad waist and round arms, as handsome as two Yuans, and a sarcastic face. She was none other than my aunt Zhu.
Du Qingtang narrowed his eyes and said nothing, and the air in the kitchen became stagnant.
Yuan Shi quickly stepped forward to smooth things over: "We are worried about you too. If you fall and get hurt, not only will you suffer, but you won't be able to go to private school and you will have to spend money on medicine."
Du Qingtang curled up her fingers and rolled them over the wound. The stinging pain made her sober up: "It's just a fall and a scratch. It will scab over in two days."
Du Qingtang was exhausted and had a splitting headache after a recent death. She didn't want to waste time talking to them. Just as she was about to leave, Zhu shoved a stack of pink fabric into her hand and said, "Wear it and come to my house tomorrow night."
It is the most popular short shirt and long skirt among women nowadays.
Every time Yuan Sheng came back from the county town, Zhu would send him all kinds of clothes and dresses, and let Du Qingtang wear them and go to Yuan's house to accompany Yuan Sheng to study, and would not let her leave until the middle of the night.
Yuan Sheng is six years older than Du Qingtang. Although he has done nothing, it does not stop her from suspecting that he is a pervert with pedophilia.
Du Qingtang turned her wrist, and her short shirt and long skirt fluttered to the ground. Her hoarse voice penetrated the dim candlelight and reached the ears of the two.
"I don't want it."
Zhu thought she had misheard: "What did you say?"
Du Qingtang: "I said, I don't want it."
"I won't wear it."
"I won't be coming to your house tomorrow night either."
Zhu and Yuan were stunned.
In their impression, Du Qingtang is dull and has no opinions of her own. She would never go west if asked to go east, and would never chase away chickens if asked to beat dogs.
This was the first time Du Qingtang said "no", and also the first time she lost the dress given by Zhu.
Zhu was the first to react, her eyes gleaming with ferocity: "You silly girl, who gave you the courage to say no?"
Yuan looked at Du Qingtang with tears in her eyes: "We are doing this for your own good. You and Sheng'er should spend more time together and develop a deep affection for each other. Only after you get married can you give birth to a son for both families as soon as possible."
Du Qingtang: “…”
If it was before she awakened, she would definitely go to Yuan's house under Yuan's crying and begging, and then be caught by Uncle Chen who was waiting for her, and the secret of her disguised as a man would be on the verge of being exposed.
This was not Du Qingtang's imagination, but a fact that actually happened.
In the first life, Uncle Chen discovered that she was wearing women's clothes. The next day, the news that Du's only son Miaomiao and Yuan Sheng were having an affair spread throughout Taoyuan Village. Some people even said that Du Qingtang was actually a woman and that she disguised herself as a man in order to protect the eldest wife's property.
The second and third branches of the Du family smelled something and came to the door, asking Yuanshi to give them an explanation.
Zhu gave Yuan "advice" and asked her to push out the daughter who looked most like Du Qingtang, saying that it was she who had a secret meeting with Yuan Sheng. Only then was Du Qingtang's identity crisis resolved.
But even so, the debate in the village about whether she was a man or a woman was still raging, which later became a major evidence of her crime of deceiving the emperor.
......
Zhu had no idea what Du Qingtang was thinking. She picked up the dress distressedly and said, "I spent two cents on this dress. If it gets broken, I'll skin you alive!"
Yuan exclaimed, "Two coins?"
Zhu said proudly: "Yes, two cents."
What about two taels of silver?
All this silver was earned by Yuanshi and the girls of the Du family, but Yuanshi gave it away without a single cent left in the name of helping her brothers.
Zhu and Yuanping accepted the money with peace of mind. Sometimes, if it was delivered late, Zhu would come to ask for it back.
It was clearly the Du family's money, but it had to depend on the Yuan family's mood. Even Du Qingtang's salary was "loaned" to her by the Yuan family.
Du Qingtang clenched his fists, afraid that he would lose control and hammer Yuan Shi into the yellow mud wall. "I met Uncle Chen on the way back. He saw me wearing a skirt to meet my cousin."
Yuan's expression changed drastically: "He knows you are a woman?"
Zhu didn't say anything. She was thinking about how to fool the old man named Chen if he found out that Du Qingtang was a girl.
Du Baya is of similar age to Du Qingtang and looks somewhat similar, making her a good candidate.
"That's not the case, but if I continue to see my cousin, it might be possible." Du Qingtang changed the subject, "You let me study, but is it so that I can pass the imperial examination and become an official?"
Zhu said without hesitation: "It's natural."
In fact, someone like Du Qingtang, who hangs out with men all day, is not worthy of carrying shoes for Sheng Ge'er.
It’s just that Du Qingtang has been dressed as a boy since she was young. She has innate advantages and can study and become an official.
Everyone knows that one person cannot carry the burden alone. Instead of letting Sheng Ge'er fight alone, it is better to let Du Qingtang be the vanguard and Sheng Ge'er just reap the credit from behind.
Zhu was not afraid that Du Qingtang would turn against her after becoming an official. If she refused to recognize her, she would sue her for deceiving the emperor!
"Concealing one's identity as a woman and pretending to be a man to take the imperial examination is a serious crime of deceiving the emperor and is punishable by beheading."
Zhu was stunned. Could it be that the dead girl was a worm in her stomach? How could she know everything she was thinking?
Yuanshi's face was filled with fear: "So we won't study anymore?"
Du Qingtang's expression was cruel and ruthless: "If I am convicted and imprisoned, I will definitely drag my mother, uncle, aunt, and cousin to death with me."
Zhu's breathing stagnated: "How dare you!"
Du Qingtang exclaimed in shock: "Do you think I dare?"
She had died so many times that she was no longer afraid.
Zhu shuddered at Du Qingtang's desperate look, but she was finally afraid: "Forget it this time, let's wait until he's no longer suspicious."
She also wants to live a long life, and wait for Sheng Ge'er to pass the imperial examination and become a high-ranking official, and then take her to the capital to live out her days in luxury.
After saying this, Zhu slipped away. Du Qingtang watched her leave, his thoughts swirling.
Women disguising themselves as men are not tolerated by the secular world. Once exposed, they will be killed instantly.
Only the dead can keep a secret forever. The Yuan family has hurt her so deeply that they deserve to pay with their lives.
"Tang Jie'er, how could you speak to your aunt like that? What if Sheng Ge'er gets angry and marries someone else?"
Yuan was as anxious as an ant on a hot pan. She paced back and forth in the kitchen, casting reproachful glances at Du Qingtang from time to time.
Du Qingtang was so dizzy from being swayed by her that she asked the question she had wanted to ask for a long time: "Is the meaning of a woman's existence just to get married and have children?"
Yuan said as a matter of course: "Of course..."
"Of course not!" Du Qingtang denied it flatly, with something burning deep in his eyes.
A woman’s value has never been about being someone’s wife or someone’s mother.
Unfortunately, Yuanshi never understood her and her mind was only focused on continuing the family line.
Yuan Shi was burned by the fire in Du Qingtang's eyes and took several steps back: "It's late, Tang Jie'er should go to bed early."
Du Qingtang knew that it would be impossible to change Yuanshi’s deeply rooted ideas in a short period of time, so he said no more.
Walking into the small house I had not seen for many years, I found only a kang, a table and a low cabinet.
There were neatly folded bedding on the kang and a handwritten copy of the Four Books on the table. Du Qingtang looked at the book, his fingers twitched nervously twice, and he looked away.
After washing up and lying on the kang, Du Qingtang thought of the books on the table and asked herself whether she should continue studying and take the imperial examinations.
I tried three times, but failed each time and ended up with no happy ending. Was it really worth it?
There was dead silence all around, and no one could give her an answer.
......
Du Qingtang was so upset that he tossed and turned, not even knowing when he fell asleep.
She had a chaotic dream all night and she couldn't remember anything when she woke up.
I opened my eyes and it was bright outside.
Du Qingtang got dressed and opened the door. Four skinny young girls with pale faces were gathered around the dining table in the kitchen, and one of them was waving at her.
"Tang'er, come and eat."
There are hundreds of households in Taoyuan Village. The original residents were very few, most of whom were people who fled from various places in the early years. After several generations of reproduction and development, the population has grown to hundreds today.
Du Qingtang's grandfather had five brothers and three sisters, and he and his grandmother raised three sons and two daughters.
Before Du Qingtang was born, Yuan had been married to the Du family for fourteen years.
During this period, her belly was almost never empty. She gave birth to eight children in fourteen years, of whom the second, third, fifth and sixth children were twins.
Including Du Qingtang, there are nine of them.
Du Qingtang firmly believed that if Boss Du were still alive, they would continue to have children until they had a son.
Looking at the terrible family background, the spark deep in Du Qingtang's heart burned brighter and brighter, and finally became a prairie fire.
At this moment, Du Qingtang suddenly made a decision.
Life is like an ant, weak and insignificant, but she was unwilling to give birth to children and raise them according to Yuanshi's idea.
I want to study.
I want to take the imperial examination.
I want to hold power, second only to the emperor and above all others.
Everyone says that women are inferior to men, so let me be the pioneer and blaze a trail that has never been seen before and will never be repeated.
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