Little Sweethearts 08
Xu Cheng'an looked at her frowning face and her expression of being frightened by the muffled thunder from time to time, and felt very guilty. He had always been with her, but she didn't know.
Jiang Qixin buried her head in the pillow. Her bed was not very big but it was bigger than an ordinary single bed. There were always two pillows on the bed, one for herself and the other just for decoration.
Jiang Qixin was holding the unused pillow in her arms right now, and there was only a faint smell of laundry detergent on the pillow.
If Xu Cheng'an were still alive, her room might also smell like him.
If Xu Cheng'an were still alive, he would definitely be sitting behind her and hugging her, letting Jiang Qixin lean against him. With his body and arms wrapped around her, she would feel more secure.
He was a lawyer during his lifetime and had witnessed many outrageous events. If Xu Cheng'an were still alive, he would definitely rack his brains to tell Jiang Qixin jokes.
Unfortunately, most of the what-ifs in this world are not true.
Even through the curtains, he could see another flash of lightning outside the window, which vanished in an instant. Jiang Qixin covered his ears with his hands, but he still heard the thunder that came soon after.
She got out of bed and gulped down a few gulps of water. When she returned to bed, she still felt a tightness in her chest and a bit of a breathlessness. She put on her headphones and listened to the instrumental music she often listened to for relaxation. The sound of thunder and rain finally became much quieter.
Jiang Qixin slowly lay down on her pillow, holding another pillow in her arms.
It was really painful, but she had grown up now and was no longer a child. She no longer had the embrace of her parents, and even Xu Chengan's embrace was gone.
Jiang Qixin lowered her head and sniffed, warm tears uncontrollably bursting out from her tear glands.
People may not be able to cry when they are extremely sad, so she did not cry when she saw Xu Cheng'an die in front of her eyes, and she did not seem to cry much at the funeral.
But when the grief in one's heart gradually faded with time, and extreme grief turned into sorrow, she began to cry.
When she was a child, Jiang Qixin listened to her teachers very much. The kindergarten teacher said that strong children would not cry, so she would not cry most of the time.
She held back her tears when she got an injection, she wouldn't cry even if the blood on her knees dripped down her calves onto the ground after she fell, and she wouldn't cry even if she did poorly on the exam.
Jiang Qixin always thought that listening to teachers was the right thing to do, and that crying was something only weak people would do. But later she realized that while crying couldn't solve the problem, it could help relieve stress.
When a person's emotions come and the body wants to cry, don't hold it in.
Jiang Qixin raised her head and looked at the ceiling, then wiped her eyes with the back of her hand. It seemed that her hands alone were not enough, so she pulled out a few more tissues.
Accompanied by the melodious and soothing instrumental music, she pinched her palms to calm herself down. As a result, Jiang Qixin fell asleep curled up on the bed with the quilt draped over her back. The front of her body was not covered by the quilt, and she was still holding those crumpled tissues in her hands.
And she hadn't even turned off the bedroom light.
Xu Cheng'an knew that she usually liked to sleep lying flat on her back, and only when her feet felt too cold in winter would she subconsciously curl up her body to bring her feet and calves closer to her upper body which was emitting heat.
Now she was curled up like a cooked shrimp, hugging the pillow. Jiang Qixin's uneasiness was self-evident.
He moved closer to Jiang Qixin. At night, Xu Cheng'an's body would be colder than during the day. Jiang Qixin's eyelashes trembled, perhaps because she felt the warmth coming closer.
Xu Cheng'an tilted his head and looked carefully at her sleeping face with her eyes closed. After making sure that she was asleep, he carefully lifted her shoulders and took the quilt that was pressing on her and covered her with it.
Just when Xu Cheng'an had covered her with a quilt and was thinking of taking a look at her by the dressing table, Xu Cheng'an was suddenly pulled into a dream.
For a long time, most of Jiang Qixin's dreams were initiated by Xu Cheng'an. She rarely pulled him into her dreams. Unless a person's obsession was deep enough, there would be a chance to pull the soul of a dead person into her dream.
As always, Xu Cheng'an's first reaction was to observe the place where her dream took place and the possible themes of the dream, so that he could better control the subsequent development of the dream.
But when he saw Jiang Qixin's dream clearly, Xu Cheng'an felt a little surprised.
This time her dream was exactly the same as the scene before she went to bed: a tidy and clean room, tightly drawn curtains, the sound of rain in her ears, and Jiang Qixin wrapped in a quilt.
Her hands were tightly grasping the edge of the pillow, and her expression still looked very depressed. Xu Chengan sat down beside the bed and hugged her, "Don't be afraid, don't be afraid."
He whispered, his warm palm patting her shoulder gently, like a mother coaxing a baby to sleep, careful and full of love.
Jiang Qixin raised her head and glanced at Xu Cheng'an, then leaned towards him.
Xu Cheng'an got on the bed and sat diagonally behind her, with one arm around her back and the other arm around her front.
She had washed her hair tonight and the strong scent of shampoo was wafting over her body.
Xu Cheng'an was much taller than her, even when sitting, he was half a head taller than her. Jiang Qixin's chin could just rest on his shoulder. Her mind was a little blank now. She was exhausted both physically and mentally and had no energy to think about anything else.
While she was still confused, a certain weight suddenly pressed on her head. She felt Xu Cheng'an resting his chin on her head, which was a little frizzy due to drying.
"Don't be afraid, I'm here." He whispered to her. Jiang Qixin's hand was resting on his chest, and his chest was trembling slightly because of his words. Her palm felt Xu Cheng'an's presence.
People still need to dream sometimes.
In the dream world, Xu Cheng'an is still alive.
His body was still warm and reassuring, and Jiang Qixin gradually leaned her entire weight towards him.
Xu Cheng'an glanced at the heavy rain outside the window and tried to use his ability to change the scene in her dream, such as making the rain stop immediately.
But perhaps due to lack of energy or because Jiang Qixin’s dream was too stubborn, Xu Cheng’an failed.
He frowned, suppressed the doubts in his heart, and continued to pat her with his palm.
"I'll stay with you and sleep with you. Are you sleepy now? If you are, you can lie down now." Xu Cheng'an hugged her and lay down.
She likes to sleep on a softer mattress. Even though it is summer now, she puts a softer mattress on top of the mattress that comes with the bed.
Jiang Qixin slowly loosened her grip on the pillow and handed it to Xu Chengan. Xu Chengan took it and placed it on his side, resting his head on it as she lay down.
Jiang Qixin turned over and looked at Xu Chengan face to face. It was not the first time they had been lying in bed like this.
Even though there were two rooms in the house, Xu Cheng'an would often sleep with her during naps when she was a child, or when Jiang Qixin got tired of playing two-player games in his room, she would just fall headfirst onto his bed.
After the two of them got together, they did things like chatting in bed under the covers.
It is said that when you like someone, you can smell a fragrance that others cannot feel. Since childhood, Jiang Qixin has felt that Xu Chengan has a very faint and reassuring fragrance. The two people who are not related by blood are closely connected.
She likes hugging because it is comfortable and makes her feel safe.
Jiang Qixin's gaze was still on him. To her, dreams were like a parallel world, a parallel world where Xu Cheng'an could accompany her until old age. In this world, Xu Cheng'an became an excellent lawyer and lived a simple and happy life with her.
He was as caring and gentle as before. He would cook for her, take care of her, and stay with her when she was scared.
Xu Chengan smiled at her, put his arm around her waist, and then closed the distance between them.
Because she was lying on her side, her slightly bent knees pressed against his thighs, and all the parts that could touch each other seemed to be pressed tightly together.
"I don't know how long this rain will last." She suddenly said in a low voice.
"The rain will stop when you fall asleep." Xu Cheng'an replied to her.
Jiang Qixin has a high sense of humor, but her humor is always strange. When she heard Xu Chengan's words which were comparable to a cold joke, she couldn't help laughing out loud and patted his arm.
She lowered her eyebrows and happened to see Xu Cheng'an's collarbone. There was a very small mole on his collarbone. He often wore formal clothes when he was working, and the white shirt underneath was usually buttoned up, so the mole on his collarbone was usually not visible.
Only when I get home, take a shower and change into pajamas with a relatively low neckline every day can I see the faintly visible little mole.
Jiang Qixin poked the mole with her fingertips. Because the mole was very small, her fingertips couldn't feel anything. Only her eyes could sense the existence of the mole.
The night always makes people prone to daydreaming. For some reason, Jiang Qixin suddenly felt that he looked a little sexy.
She poked Xu Cheng'an's collarbone again with a smile. Xu Cheng'an didn't know why she did this suddenly, but he still obediently raised his head slightly so that she could touch his collarbone better.
As he raised his head slightly, the Adam's apple on his neck became particularly prominent. Jiang Qixin raised his head and pinched Xu Cheng'an's chin.
He lowered his head and let her do what she wanted, but the hands around her waist unconsciously tightened their grip.
Jiang Qixin moved her body and kissed his lower lip. Xu Cheng'an was stunned for a moment, squinted his eyes and lowered his head to deepen their kiss.
Jiang Qixin raised her hands and placed them on his shoulders, her body pressed close to him.
She felt Xu Cheng'an's well-trained body pressed tightly against her upper body, and Jiang Qixin's fingertips subconsciously gripped his shoulders tightly.
Xu Cheng'an felt the force of her fingertips piercing his shoulder, and a strange excitement rose in his heart. He liked all the marks Jiang Qixin left on his body, whether they were kisses or scratches.
After a deep kiss, Jiang Qixin lowered her head and breathed lightly. Xu Chengan still hugged her tightly as before, "Jiang Jiang, I will always be with you."
Jiang Qixin was stunned for a moment, not knowing why Xu Cheng'an suddenly said that, but she just felt a little pain in her chest, like being hit with a blunt object, which made her extremely uncomfortable.
Xu Chengan rubbed his cheek against her head and said, "I love you."
Finally recovering from the deep kiss, Jiang Qixin's heart beat faster again because of his words. She seemed to sense something strange in Xu Cheng'an's words, and she slowly raised her head.
The lights in the room were still on, and the overhead light just happened to hit Xu Cheng'an's face. Jiang Qixin saw his moist eyes, and she was puzzled. She touched the corners of his eyes with her fingertips, "What's wrong? Why are you crying suddenly? I'm scared. Why are you crying?" She asked with a wry smile.
Another thunder sounded beside my ears.
Jiang Qijojoxin seems a bit careless in her daily life, but she is actually very sensitive and easily influenced by the outside world.
Because her attention was focused on Xu Cheng'an, she didn't notice the lightning flashing outside the window, so Jiang Qixin was frightened by the sudden thunder. The fingertips that were touching the corner of his eyes trembled slightly.
Xu Cheng'an raised his hand and wrapped it against the back of her hand, holding her hand so that her palm was against his face.
He rubbed her palm like a puppy rubbing against its owner, but unlike a puppy, he didn't want to leave his scent on Jiang Qixin. Instead, he wanted her scent to stay on him.
Jiang Qixin actually rarely saw Xu Chengan cry. No matter whether she encountered danger or difficulties, Xu Chengan was always the one who walked in front of her. So no matter how sad he was, he would not cry in order not to affect Jiang Qixin's mood.
Jiang Qixin was very puzzled, so she had to hold his face and kiss Xu Chengan again.
While moving, she felt her knee seemed to rub against a strange bulge. Jiang Qixin paused stiffly for a moment, then suddenly giggled a few times.
Xu Cheng'an was bumped by her and let out a muffled groan from his throat.
Jiang Qixin looked at his red earlobes. For some reason, she felt as if she had not been close to Xu Chengan for a long time. She blinked at Xu Chengan, then put her hand on his body.
Xu Cheng'an recalled the two recent dreams in which she had intimate interactions, both of which left an impression on her, although she still couldn't completely remember the content of the dreams.
He was a little hesitant. It was just a dream. The Jiang Qixin in the dream was Jiang Qixin himself. Besides, they had done the most intimate things before, so as long as Jiang Qixin wanted to do it, he would not be shy.
Xu Cheng'an was just a little worried that this was too frivolous and would dislike her.
While he still had some sanity left and was hesitating, her hand quietly reached under his pajamas, and Jiang Qixin even poked his chest with her fingertips with some malicious intent.
Xu Chengan hummed again.
He held her hand through her pajamas. There was still a thunderstorm outside, and Jiang Qixin's attention had obviously been diverted by him. The uneasiness and anxiety in her heart had also dissipated. So as long as she had no mind to pay attention to the outside world, her uneasiness would completely disappear.
Xu Cheng'an thought about it, then turned over and supported himself with his hands on her body.
Jiang Qixin raised her head and looked into his eyes. She broke free from Xu Cheng'an's hand, reached out from under his pajamas, and then raised it to wrap around his neck. She used some strength to raise her head and kissed Xu Cheng'an.
The tears in his eyes seemed to have not been wiped away yet, and his voice was a little nasal, but he was indeed feeling very complicated. He was excited by her, but he felt uncomfortable because he could not let her see him.
He just wanted Jiang Qixin to live a happy, healthy and peaceful life. Xu Cheng'an didn't expect that his death would become the saddest thing for her now.
When Jiang Qixin took the initiative to kiss him, it was usually just a gentle and subtle kiss like a dragonfly touching the water, and rarely was it as passionate as it was now.
She clearly didn't know in her dream that Xu Cheng'an had passed away, but she always felt like she couldn't catch him.
Only when her body felt his body temperature and her skin touched him could she be sure that Xu Cheng'an was indeed by her side.
Xu Cheng'an responded to her kiss and caressed her gently with his hands. Although they hadn't done it for a long time, he was still so familiar with her body.
Xu Cheng'an knew that part of her body was sensitive and ticklish, so he wouldn't touch her there intentionally. He knew exactly where to touch her and how much pressure to use to make her feel happy and comfortable, and he knew how to use his body to make her happy.
Jiang Qixin bit his lower lip lightly with her teeth again, just like before. It was very light, not enough to leave a tooth mark, but it allowed Xu Cheng'an to feel her strength.
He lowered his head and pressed his forehead against hers, wanting to hold her tightly and let her scent drown him.
"Jiang Jiang, do you want to do it?"
Jiang Qixin raised her eyebrows and looked into his eyes, then nodded brightly at Xu Cheng'an.
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