0170 The Author's Random Thoughts
After seven months, Zhou Xiye's story is finally finished.
This journey felt like I had stumbled into Zhou Xiye's universe and recorded a small part of the ups and downs of her life.
There was reluctance, melancholy, but also a sense of relief, knowing that I could give them a satisfactory explanation.
I can imagine everything that follows: Ling Xingzhi and Zhou Xiye bicker and fight their whole lives. First, he subdues Old Ling and sends him away. Then, he avenges Ye Rouxin. Next, Zhou Xiye suppresses Ling Xingzhi. The closest of husband and wife become distant. Finally, Zhou Xiye takes the lead, and Ling Xingzhi becomes the man behind her.
Step by step, they transformed from participants in the struggle into controllers. Yet, fearing that the other side would become too powerful and abandon them, they set obstacles at every turn, weaving a web of power to trap both the other and themselves, a process they found entirely satisfying.
I had previously imagined Zhou Xi returning to the central government, overcoming all obstacles and wreaking havoc. But as I actually wrote this, something felt off. From a literary perspective, after a character completes a transformation, she will reach an even greater peak.
Zhou Xiye's road is long, and I can't accompany her all the way. But Ling Xingzhi can; he will always be her most loyal comrade-in-arms and lover.
At this moment, I feel like someone who has stumbled upon the Peach Blossom Spring, the countdown has begun, and I must return to reality. The path to the Peach Blossom Spring is no longer open to me. Therefore, I respect the characters' choices, and I hope they live and strive well in another universe. I should also learn from them.
The creative process is wonderful.
I've told many people that writing "Nothing But a Vast Expanse" is exhausting, yet I can't stop. I'm completely immersed in their world, experiencing all their emotions—it's exhausting. Stepping back, that world is complex, frightening, yet also exhilarating. Every time I finish writing, I feel utterly drained, a feeling I've never had before; writing it is incredibly cathartic.
Looking back now, I was surprised to find that the emotional aspect of this novel was relatively minor. In all the historical books I've read, there are far too few descriptions of emotions, and far too few instances of people using emotion to change history. Emotions are nothing compared to power, but it is precisely because of the immense temptation that the emotions they evoked are all the more precious and genuine.
My initial motivation for writing "Nothing But a Vast Expanse" stemmed from the fact that I had witnessed men who stood up for their beliefs and voiced their grievances throughout history. Women, on the other hand, seemed only capable of weeping, accepting the helplessness of reality, and confined to a square world, like willows swaying in the wind.
Even Mulan, from the Northern and Southern Dynasties period, is just a story. I can imagine her with flowing hair, bravely fighting on horseback, her blood boiling. History, in the end, owes women many screen time. Therefore, I want the woman I create to be resolute, passionate, fierce, and strategically brilliant.
But she is not Mulan.
She is herself.
I thought I would have a lot to say after I finished writing, but now that it's truly over, it seems there's nothing to say at all.
I think... everything I wanted to express is in the article.
...Perhaps, there are no regrets left?
At first, I only wanted to write a novel of 200,000 words, which I could finish quickly. But the more I wrote, the more I wrote. The characters took me to the heavens and the earth, and the word count went from 300,000 to 400,000, then 500,000, and finally, I wrote nearly 600,000 words.
I was terrified during this time—terrified of not writing well, afraid that the characters would no longer be themselves, afraid that they would leave my pen. Even now, I feel that there are still many incomplete logical chains in this novel (I'll fix them later) (shrug). But honestly, this is the best ending I can give.
The anticipated ending is that everyone except Zhou Xiye and Ling Xingzhi will die.
Including Zhou Pei.
But because everyone liked him, I didn't let him die.
Hahahahahaha
In conclusion!! I am very satisfied with this novel. In 2023, I was able to write such a novel, and I am proud of myself!
See you in the next book!!!
Thank you all for being with me. I know all the readers who have been with me from beginning to end!! (As long as you don't change your name)
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