Chapter 49. They deserve to die.
How high the cliff is, only God knows.
Shimi felt that she might really be finished this time. She was so young, and hadn't even tasted the joy of living before her lifespan was coming to an end. She was truly unwilling to accept it and would die with her eyes wide open in disbelief.
Fortunately, she hadn't used up all her treasures yet, and something suddenly pulled her falling body back up. By the time she could see clearly, she had already landed on her back. The fall had stunned her a bit, but she wasn't injured. Looking around in the moonlight, she saw a winding, colorful thread beside her—it was her puppet's silk, which had saved her life at the crucial moment.
Struggling to get up, I suddenly heard a "thud" as something heavy fell to the ground beside me.
She turned her head and saw that the dark figure seemed to be a person; it not only moved but also made sounds. She heard a broken voice calling for Ami, as it struggled to roll over and crawl towards her. Reaching her side, it stroked her face with trembling hands, calling out to her with suppressed fear, "Ami, wake up... I'm sorry, I didn't catch you."
Shi Mi suddenly felt comforted. He didn't even know how high the cliff was, yet he jumped off. It seemed he truly had some affection for her. Setting aside the cause and effect that he couldn't live either if she died, the iron box she left him would allow him to live for another two or three months without any problem. But he jumped down, trying to save her; this courage to share life and death was still truly admirable.
Seeing that she did not respond, he reached out to touch her nose to check her breath. Knowing that she was a clever person, she immediately held her breath.
He felt nothing, and suddenly broke down, sobbing uncontrollably, "Is this my fate? Losing my mother at four, poisoned by my own father at thirteen. I finally had someone to keep me company day and night, but before I could even enjoy two good days, she was gone... I have nothing left..."
To be honest, his ramblings felt like an act, but the content did evoke sympathy. Just as Shimi was about to mock him, a tear fell onto her cheek, and she realized he was truly crying.
He held her tightly, buried his face in her shoulder, and sobbed uncontrollably. Although his crying might not have been genuine, he was releasing his emotions, and the sadness in his heart was real.
Shimi couldn't hold out for long. She raised her hand and patted his back. "Alright, it's okay to cry for a bit. Anyway, your grandfather faked his death many years ago. Just pretend he never lived. You've already paid off the debt you owed him. You don't have to worry about him anymore. Isn't that good?"
He seemed to gradually calm down, and sighed, "Does my mourning for my deceased wife seem so fake? You're not moved at all by me."
Shimi said, "Yes, it's very fake. When you're extremely sad, you can't even speak. You just rambled on and on, like lyrics from a play."
He sighed again and asked her if she was injured. "I only realized how low the cliff was after I jumped down. With your skills, you shouldn't have died from the fall."
Shi Mi sensed her surroundings and found that apart from being momentarily dazed after landing on her back, she was otherwise fine. She forced herself to sit up and said, "What if the cliff is very high? If you jumped down after it, wouldn't you be dead too?"
He said, "I followed you because I was afraid we wouldn't be able to find your body. The person just died, and the blood is still warm. I wanted to see if I could collect as much as possible so I could live a little longer."
"That's not the truth, I'm just saying the annoying things." Shi Mi rolled her eyes at him, stood up, and looked up. The moonlight was bright, making the cliff face look as if it had been cut by a knife. You might say it's not high, but it's still about ten zhang (about 33 meters) high. At least you can't see any firelight above, and you can't hear anyone shouting.
She took a breath, intending to shout, but he covered her mouth.
"I don't know what the situation is up there. What if you shout and summon the remnants of the bandits?"
So she had no choice but to give up. She braced herself against her back and looked around. The surrounding area was dense forest, and the terrain was treacherous. The people searching for them probably wouldn't find this place for a while. Fortunately, there was a protrusion on the cliff face, which could provide cover. She dragged herself inside. The height only allowed her to bend over halfway, but there was plenty of room to sit or lie down. If she could light a fire, that would be even better.
Just as he was thinking about how to start a fire by rubbing sticks together, he saw Lu Min bring in a branch. He had seven essential items hanging from his belt, the most important of which was flint. He found some soft grass to ignite and quickly started a fire.
The nights in the mountains are cold, and it's hard to bear without a fire, but when the dark world is suddenly illuminated by an orange-red light, the mood immediately becomes less gloomy.
It was because of the light that she noticed his wound was still bleeding, his collar was covered with specks of blood, and his hair was disheveled, making him look both beautiful and pitiful.
Of course, she didn't quite understand why she described him that way. Perhaps it was because she was used to his aloofness, and his sudden downfall made him seem pitiful...
It seems like the more I explain, the more confusing it gets, so I'll just leave it at that.
Neither of them spoke, and they sat in front of the fire, gazing at the flames in a daze. He hugged his knees, occasionally poking at the fire, his eyes reddening, whether from exhaustion or tears welling up, it was hard to tell.
After a long time, he finally asked her, "Your master's letter is fake. Are you still going back to Lingyin Mountain?"
She replied, "We've already come this far; we just need to climb a few more hills to reach our destination."
"When you go back to see your master, what will you say? Will you report our marriage?"
Speaking of this, she felt somewhat lost. If her master asked, "You clearly have a grudge against him, and his life is in your hands, so why is he still alive...?" how should she answer?
He had been watching her expressions closely, and when he saw her brows furrowed, he knew what was troubling her.
His tone remained calm, as if he were recounting someone else's story. "Previously, my grandfather tried to persuade you to defect, saying that I led the army to conquer the Yu Dynasty and that I massacred 200,000 soldiers in Chong'an City... I know this is an insurmountable feud between us, and I have always been reluctant to face it. But today, it seems I should have a thorough talk with you. Ami, conquering the world is every man's heroic dream, though it is bloody and cruel. If I indulge in comfort today, I will become someone else's prey tomorrow. You think the five kingdoms are at peace, but in fact, there is war on the neighboring borders every day. A single spark can start a prairie fire, and it is only a matter of time before the world descends into chaos. As for the massacre of 200,000 soldiers, in the siege, the King of Yu died 80,000, and the remaining 120,000 prisoners were ordered to be killed by the king. I obeyed the order, but I did not actually follow it."
As Shi Mi listened to his detailed explanation, his heart suddenly tightened at the end. "What does it mean that you didn't do it?"
He lowered his brows and gave a bitter smile. "I did kill them, but not all of them. They were executed in batches. Forty thousand were killed and buried on the ancient battlefield outside the city. The remaining eighty thousand were reorganized into the Sixteen Guards of the Border. However, the risk was great. I had to keep the secret with each army. I summoned the generals of the Sixteen Guards to my tent to make decisions together. I promised that these eighty thousand laborers would be used to cultivate military granaries, manufacture weapons, and build passes, because only by sharing the benefits could these generals share the responsibility. As for me, I gained a good reputation for benevolence and saved eighty thousand lives. Unfortunately, my abilities were limited, and this was the most I could do. Later, Emperor Shengyuan must have heard about it. I volunteered to go to Zhongdu to supervise the construction of the imperial mausoleum, and he agreed without trying to stop me. In other people's eyes, it was a successful retirement, but in Emperor Shengyuan's eyes, wasn't it just an exile with a guilty conscience?"
Hearing these inside stories left her stunned. "Eight hundred people are already struggling, let alone eighty thousand! I don't believe it. Are you lying to me again?"
Lu Min stared at the fire, muttering to himself, "When will you ever give me a little trust? I've been strategizing for so many years, I have some skills. If you don't believe me, go ask the soldiers building the tomb passage in Chong'an City how many of them are from Qianyu. I know killing 40,000 is a grave sin, but under those circumstances, I couldn't disobey the imperial order. Only with these 40,000 corpses can 80,000 lives be saved. If you were in my shoes, what would you choose?"
He turned his gaze to look directly at her. "Ami, although I am the one who conquered Zhongdu, I spared so many lives of the Yu army. I am not a virtuous person, but I am not an irredeemable villain either. Today, I will tell you the truth. Will it change your opinion of me a little? Don't hate me so much anymore, and don't always want to kill me. I am actually quite pitiful. Don't think that just because I am in the position of Grand Tutor, I am an impenetrable fortress and cannot be hurt."
The roaring campfire illuminated his eyes and also revealed her bewilderment.
What to do? It seems somewhat excusable. Forty thousand lives are enough to kill him forty thousand times over, but by saving eighty thousand lives, it seems that he can offset some of his sins.
She didn't entirely believe those empty words; as for his supposed change of heart, even a dog could climb a tree. But when it came to profit, 80,000 men were a significant asset for the border garrison. He had already intended to contend with the capital's garrison, and with these 80,000 men, it was equivalent to adding another guard to the border. Why wouldn't he take such a lucrative deal?
Therefore, greed is not always a bad thing. By squeezing every last drop of value out of the Yu Dynasty, those 80,000 people were spared. Even now, being forced to build the imperial mausoleum for Emperor Shengyuan is still better than death.
After considering for a moment, she said, "Let's put this old grudge aside for now and think about how to reunite with my senior brothers."
Seeing that she had agreed, he smiled with a hint of composure. He didn't say much, just glanced at her, then glanced at her again. The more he looked at her, the more the image of this woman was etched into his mind, and she could never escape it again.
Feeling embarrassed by his gaze, Shimi raised her hand to cover the cheek next to his.
He grabbed her hand and said, "This is the first time I've ever seen you shy. We're an old married couple, what's there to be ashamed of?"
Unconvinced, he retorted, "What do you mean by 'old married couple'? Don't try to get too close to me."
"Isn't that so?" he said devoutly. "In my heart, you are my lawfully wedded wife. Ami, you have no idea how much I love you. I miss you terribly if I don't see you for even a moment. When I heard the news of your escape from home at Gaoyitai, I rushed out without even finishing my official duties. I've been on the go for the past two days, not even having time to drink water. On the way, I was still thinking how despicable that person was and how I would teach him a lesson if I caught him. But as soon as I saw you, I was overjoyed from the bottom of my heart. What you've done doesn't matter, as long as you're with me at this moment, that's enough."
"So you jumped, not afraid of dying?"
He smiled sheepishly, "I'm only afraid of losing you."
Shimi felt a chill run down her spine. She was an independent and decisive woman, and she really didn't know what to do when she encountered someone like this.
Faced with his tender affection, she responded rather clumsily, and after thinking for a moment, she said, "Let me take a look at the wound on your neck. It's just a pity that I don't have any putty to treat it."
He obediently leaned closer, parting his collar to let her examine him. The blood, having scabbed over, caused a sharp pain as it was peeled away from his skin. He hissed in shock, his face paling slightly, but his eyes held warmth.
"It's alright, the injury isn't deep." He said, then suddenly twisted his body, half-supporting himself, as if he were frozen in place.
Shimi couldn't remember when he had last blessed him; his mind was in turmoil, and he felt as if a long time had passed. He had just survived a fierce battle that had drained him of immense resources, and it seemed he was nearing the point of inactivation again.
What is there to hesitate about? Saving lives is the most important thing.
She peeled open his shirt, cut her finger, and as blood dripped, chanted an incantation: "Our veins share the same path, our creations are of the same mechanism. All bones obey my command, all pivots return to one!"
Before the blood could even seep into the red thread, he grabbed her neck and pulled her close. He whispered reproachfully, "You only care about me if I pretend to be dead. I haven't kissed you in days; today, take the initiative."
Shi Mi struggled up, "You keep using this trick, it doesn't work anymore! Look at you now, you can control it perfectly, why are you still pretending? Aren't you annoying!"
"You find me annoying? What are you going to do with me for the next few decades? When I'm old and faded, are you going to put me in a box and bury me?"
He's good at making a fuss over nothing; he'll act like a child begging for candy, and you can't really do anything to him.
He kissed her fiercely, as if venting his anger. This place, with the open sky and the bare earth, possessed a wild charm that aroused desire even more than a beautifully decorated bedroom. She was kissed until she had nowhere to hide and had given up struggling. He was like someone who had plunged headlong into a garden, caring nothing for the future but only for the pleasure of the moment.
He tormented her, turning her over and over, and asked her in a daze, "Would you allow a second person to treat you like this? I'm the only one, aren't I?"
Shimi's mind seemed to be drained, still pondering whether Banyan had evolved the highest level of technique, capable of absorbing the spirit of a puppeteer through kisses? She felt a warm sensation all over her body, having already grown accustomed to and enjoying his service. It was truly a tragedy; it's hard to go from luxury to frugality. How could she not like his wonderful methods?
Perhaps the puppet master also finds the puppeteer irresistibly attractive. Especially since the puppeteer's chest contains such a powerful heart, and he slowly transforms into a living person while carrying her lifeblood, it's far better than some wild man he might encounter on the road.
She was swayed by his coaxing and became confused, saying, "Yes."
He kissed her again, but suddenly stopped when he was completely captivated. He must have remembered something painful, because he buried his face in her shoulder and sighed softly, "I can't just think of myself and hold you back."
Shi Mi immediately understood his meaning, though he never said it aloud, they understood each other implicitly.
She had never dared to ask this question directly, partly because it was inconvenient, and partly because she felt guilty. So even now, she still hesitated and said vaguely, "You are a person with a conscience, thinking of me so much. I didn't misjudge you."
He slowly raised his head, his eyes staring straight at her. "And you? Have you reflected on your actions? Do you feel guilty for letting me down? I'm a good person... I wasn't like this before."
Now she really showed her fear, her eyes darting around, but she still wouldn't back down, muttering and arguing: "You were perfectly fine, but you've been poisoned to the point of being riddled with holes... That bone poison is very harmful to the body. Maybe it poisoned those parts you don't use often. You were already terminally ill, but you just didn't realize it."
His expression changed slightly. "How could you say such a thing! Bone poison damages the bones. How can it erode places without bones? Besides, I know whether it's good or bad!"
It was really hard to admit that his skills were lacking, especially since his master hadn't emphasized this aspect. Knowing he was in the wrong, he could only try his best to make amends, stammering, "When I get back this time, I'll ask my master for advice and see if there's any way to salvage this." As he spoke, he patted his cheek reassuringly, "Be patient, there's always a way out, things will get better."
A glimmer of light flashed in his eyes, and his emotions finally changed. He kissed her lips again. "Ami, you must be laughing at me, thinking I'm pathetic, right?"
How could she say that? It was her own oversight that led to these problems in both of their halves. She was the one who wronged him; she felt too guilty to even think of mocking him.
She was a simple girl, really simple. Her expression was full of remorse, and she tried to comfort him, saying, "The second half is abnormal, but the first half is good. We are not shallow people, so don't worry about those trivial details."
The upper half is fine, you can still kiss the upper half, right? He was almost infuriated by her strange argument, but he still patiently argued with her, "If I do anything outrageous, don't be angry with me, after all, I'm powerless... Do you know how heavy a blow that is for a man?"
Shi Mi nodded repeatedly, "I'm so sorry, I really didn't expect that I would make such a mistake." She cupped his face and kissed him sincerely twice, "Is that alright? You have to give me some time so I can find a way to cure you."
"Whether it can be cured or not is another matter." He turned his cheek and rubbed it affectionately against her palm. "Anyway, you have to give me some compensation. I don't want anything else, just love me wholeheartedly."
Then, somehow, he pushed her down. His cloak, which he had taken off, was placed right beneath her; it was very soft and didn't feel uncomfortable at all. For a moment, Shimi felt that he might have planned this all along, and was plotting against her again. But before she could even think about it, he pinned her down, and his kisses overwhelmed her. She thought sadly that her skills had failed her, and it seemed she deserved to be kissed to death by him.
A restless hand roamed all over her body. She tried to stop him, but he said sadly, "Ami, I am very sad."
Shimi immediately felt embarrassed to scold him, thinking that it didn't matter if he touched her a few times, and that he could touch her if he liked.
However, the current physical intimacy was far from quenching his thirst; he wanted more, and mere caresses of her neck were no longer enough. He parted her collar and began to dart downwards, his mind reeling. Just as he was about to object, he looked up and murmured in despair, "Ami, I am no different from a eunuch now."
The naive girl blinked a few times, then swallowed her dissatisfaction. Generally speaking, those who cannot fulfill their sexual obligations are somewhat psychologically twisted, and the culprit for their inability is themselves, even if they have overstepped their bounds…
Never mind.
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