Mu Yiran stared at his profile in surprise, her heart heavy with the emptiness in her hands.
"...What happened to you just now?"
Shi Youxi: "What could I possibly do?"
He seemed to have forgotten how tenderly he had just been in her arms, and stood up, saying:
"Your mother will be buried today. There's nothing more for you to do after that. You can go back now."
What does this mean?
Shi Youxi is trying to get rid of her?!
The man pressed a bell behind the door: "Shijie, come and bring—"
"Beep!" The call was disconnected.
"...Why?" Mu Yiran caught up with him and grabbed him, looking directly into the man's eyes.
"You were the one calling me just now, you were the one who needed me! Why... are you trying to get rid of me now?"
"So why did you come here?" Shi Youxi looked at her and said slowly, "Did you come to tell everyone that you are my wife, to tell my father that you are my lover, or to tell me... that you are willing to forgive me?"
Mu Yiran was speechless. "I..."
Shi Youxi could tell from her hesitant expression at a glance. He curled his lips in a mocking smile and said, "You still mind? You still mind those things and hate me? If that's the case, why are you still staying here? Don't you feel disgusted and want to vomit when you see my face?"
"Just because of that! So I can't even care about you?!" Mu Yiran couldn't stand his sarcasm. "I'm just... worried about you, is that not allowed...?"
She knew how much Shi Youxi cared about Bai Shengsheng, even though she said she no longer expected love from her parents, and even though she went against them in every way and pretended to be indifferent.
But these two people are the only people in the world he has a blood tie with, how could he not feel pain!
"...Worried?" Shi Youxi suddenly chuckled. He looked at Mu Yiran, whose eyes were red-rimmed, and said something completely unrelated:
"Do you know what Father is doing right now? Do you know what kind of ceremony those people are performing for Mother?"
Mu Yiran didn't understand: "What?"
Shi Youxi raised his hand and casually tore off the bandage, revealing a clear cut made by a knife. "In cults, they use the blood of their closest relatives as a base, smearing it all over the body. The deceased will be bound to the blood's owner in every life."
He looked at Mu Yiran's incredulous expression and smiled knowingly. "They all say Mother committed suicide, but that's not true. Do you know why, sister?"
"....."
Without her asking, Shi Youxi whispered to herself:
"My mother was driven to her death by my father."
Mu Yiran's eyelids twitched as she listened to him describe, with a hint of a smile, how his father had driven his mother to her death.
The woman, who had been insane for over a decade, finally managed to completely forget the past and herself, living in the beautiful dream woven by her husband. She should have lived out her life in a daze, yet happily.
But then, I suddenly remembered whose bones this beautiful dream was built upon.
Even without witnessing it firsthand, Shi Youxi could imagine how desperate Bai Shengsheng looked when she saw Cheng Mo's tombstone at Labrang Monastery, and how strong her desire to die must have been at that moment.
Shi Yan believed that he could pray for divine protection in the temple.
But he never expected that his prayers would bring him retribution.
"..."
"Are you scared? Even after death, your mother won't be spared by your father. She will be buried next to him, her whole body smeared with his blood, cursed so that she can only wait for him to die with her in her next life!"
Shi Youxi took a step closer to her, pressing her for answers: "I was born into this kind of family, I inherited this kind of blood, and I am just like them, selfish and unscrupulous. Even though I felt sorry for my mother, I still cooperated with my father when he wanted to take her back in life, because I understand my father best! Because I am just like him, crazy and despicable!"
"So even if I know that what I did was wrong, even if I want to ask you to forgive me now, as long as my sister still has the slightest thought of leaving me in the future..." He affectionately stroked her face, their foreheads touching, but his hands were on Mu Yiran's neck.
"...I will still lock you up, just like Father did to Mother."
"Sister, that's just who I am."
"From the moment you agreed to marry me, from the moment you said you liked me, you had no chance to run away. If you want to leave me, you'll have to kill me."
"Shi Youxi..." The tightening pressure on her neck made it hard for her to breathe, and it was impossible for Mu Yiran not to tremble with fear.
Her hand touched the man's hand, and she instinctively tried to pry it off. Their wedding rings clashed together, causing a shocking pain.
“I won’t refuse to kill you. At most, I’ll add an article to my will, asking Shi Men to kill you too. Even if I die, I want my sister to be the coffin lid that holds me.”
"Even if you lock me up in a mental hospital, I'll still book a double room with you."
"I will cling to you for the rest of my life, and Shi Youxi will only ever be by your side!"
"Are you scared?" Shi Youxi's pupils were dark and lifeless, the only light in them focused on the woman in front of him. He didn't miss the panic in Mu Yiran's eyes, but he was extremely happy.
"Look at you, so scared..."
His lips curled into a smile. "You're afraid of everything, you blame everything, and you still dare to say you're worried about me."
"I don't want your feigned concern, sister. If you haven't fully accepted me, if you haven't fallen in love with the complete Shi Youxi, then stop giving me false hope. For now, stay as far away from me as possible, be as perfunctory as possible, maybe..."
He looked at Mu Yiran's red-rimmed eyes, and suddenly the image of Bai Shengsheng's relieved smile before she breathed her last flashed before his eyes.
The man's bloodshot eyes relaxed.
The scratches hidden under my clothes started to itch and hurt.
The bittersweet feeling of love surged wildly at this moment, fueled by fear.
The woman in front of him turned pale, and he heard Ai Ni scream in terror.
Shi Youxi suddenly let go of his hand. After regaining his senses, he smiled in a way that was both obedient and desolate.
"...Maybe I'll really let you go when I get tired of you in the future."
"......."
The man stopped looking at her, walked out of the room and said to Shijie and Aini who were waiting outside, "Take her back."
"ah?"
She was still carrying her medicine kit, but didn't have time to apply the medicine to his wound.
Ai Ni entered the room and her heart softened when she saw Mu Yiran, whose eyes were red and swollen with tears. "...Madam, are you alright?!"
Mu Yiran wiped her face in a disheveled state, "...Do I really have to leave?"
Feeling awkward about coming in, Shi Jie could only speak loudly, "Sir insists that I take you back... Madam, Shi Ye will be coming later, and it might be a bit of a hassle for you here."
After saying that, he realized his words were ambiguous and quickly explained, "I! I didn't mean to bother you! Those people are a mixed bag, and I was worried you might be recognized and harassed—"
"I understand." Mu Yiran wasn't one to dawdle. She walked out the door, glanced at the end of the corridor where the candles lit for the ceremony could still be seen, and said to Shijie:
"Can I just stop around here and wait until they're buried before I leave? Is that alright?"
At this stage, how could we dare say no?
Besides the two of them, a whole carload of people escorted her as she walked.
Mu Yiran waited not far from the mountainside until the first half of the night. The all-black hearse drove out and headed towards the cemetery, and she watched it from a distance that was neither too close nor too far.
To achieve the purpose of the ceremony, Shi Yan did not cremate Bai Shengsheng. Instead, he bought the back half of the cemetery, right behind Bai Shengsheng's parents' tombstones, and placed Bai Shengsheng's remains under an empty urn.
Bai Shengsheng's remains were beautiful; she was dressed in an exquisite white gown, wearing a wedding ring, and holding her favorite bouquet.
The urn above contained the blood, birth date, hair, and fingernails of the three family members.
Shi Yan didn't let anyone interfere; he slowly, bit by bit, filled one side of the double pit with soil.
The night was dark, but he could clearly see what the white coffin looked like and how it was gradually buried in the dust by his hands.
…even the last light he could see was gone.
As if his soul had found its home, the wind began to whistle, and Shi Yan heard Bai Shengsheng's voice in his ear.
Before their final parting, she was still willing to talk to him and leave him a message.
"Shiyan, if there is a next life, I hope we never meet again. And you, if there is a next life... will you let me go?"
"...Won't."
Bai Shengsheng gave a weak smile. She was dressed in bright red and even had light makeup on her face.
She dressed up carefully, just to say goodbye to him forever.
She looked at Shi Yan's face, which had withered instantly. Seeing such a miserable state on this selfish man, she felt no pleasure at all.
On her deathbed, Bai Shengsheng actually saw her first encounter with Shi Yan in a revolving lantern.
That day, she didn't wear her favorite white, but instead wore red to celebrate her birthday.
Thinking back on it this way, the memory of that day is actually... quite good.
If only... she and Shi Yan had met sooner...
Before she got engaged to Cheng Mo, before she fell in love with Cheng Mo, so that Cheng Mo wouldn't die, and her parents wouldn't be hit and killed by a drunk truck while chasing after their abducted daughter.
If only it could have been earlier...
If it were any earlier…
Unfortunately, there was no way to resolve the conflict between her and Shi Yan in this lifetime.
As life slowly faded away, Bai Shengsheng didn't know whether she had accepted it or didn't care because she was going to die anyway. Her eyes became cloudy, and she spoke to Shi Yan little by little.
One last time:
"I see... Then in your next life, don't make me feel entitled to hate you again."
"Shi Yan, in the next life..."
"I want to fall in love with you legitimately."
—“........”
I need to rightfully become someone Bai Shengsheng can love.
Shi Yan muttered madly:
"I will. I'll go find Sheng Sheng sooner, and I'll make sure you like me first..."
"So wait for me, wait for me to find you, wait for me, wait for me to show you..."
"......."
Shi Youxi stood to the side, holding the only family photo, watching Shi Yan's actions in a daze, seeing Shi Yan hurt himself with the shovel, seeing the blood dripping on the red soil, and hearing him mutter to himself.
The man gradually pulled the group photo closer to his chest, staring blankly, seemingly lost in thought.
The night rain poured down, soaking people's faces and burying all the lamentations into the earth.
————
The next morning, news of the death of Bai Shengsheng, the former genius designer and ex-wife of Shi Yan, the former head of the Shi family, still spread online.
Many people from the entertainment and fashion circles, whether they knew about it or had heard of it, came to watch and comment.
However, discussions about women in society are often extreme and made without thinking.
Some even began to judge that Bai Shengsheng's marriage into the wealthy family was a case of a mistress taking over and squeezing out Shi Yan's marriage partner, and that she deserved her miserable end.
Mu Yiran had just woken up from her dream when she saw these contents. She returned to Hai City at seven o'clock, and it was only nine o'clock in the morning.
In her dream, Shi Youxi was again pushing her away with harsh words, and she was again lying dejectedly in the crowd, letting countless hands cover her.
But what she couldn't forget was that Shi Youxi had turned into his childhood self... a small figure with no one behind him, his empty eyes looking at her, accusing her of not wanting him anymore.
When she woke up, her heart was throbbing with pain.
"Hey? Mu Mu, did I disturb your sleep?" Mu Yiran looked at the posts on the iPad, thinking that Shi Yan was no longer paying attention to them, and some of the articles had not yet been removed.
Mo Mumu's voice was deathly inhuman, but still alive. "Um...what is it? Tell me."
"I'd like to borrow Wenxin's PR team from you to help me remove some of the negative information—" Before she could even utter the words "negative information," Mo Mumu interrupted:
"You want to retract your husband's mother's article, right?"
"...How did you know?"
"Ah, maybe Bai Shengsheng was more famous here in Libya. The news of her death came out here earlier than in China."
"Okay... just remove those entries and articles. It won't be too difficult for your employees. If that doesn't work, no problem, I'll find someone else—"
Upon hearing the woman's polite explanation, Mo Mumu said "Hey".
"Why are you looking at me like that, Mu Yiran? Are you afraid I won't help you because I dislike Shi Youxi?"
Mu Yiran was taken aback for a moment, realizing how terrible her mood was, and awkwardly pleaded in a soft, coquettish voice, "...No, it's just that I wanted to take advantage of you..."
"Fine, take it! You're the only one who'd want something from me, aren't you? You're helping my Ran out of her time of need. If word gets out, your little husband will be green with envy!"
"…………" Mu Yiran pinched the bridge of her nose. "Okay, then help me tell your employees to get up and get to work. I'll hang up now—"
"Hey! Where are you right now? In the capital? Are you observing mourning for the Shi family? I'm at the airport, I'll come straight there—"
“No need!” Mu Yiran called out. “I… am back. His mother’s funeral was kept simple and she has already been buried.”
Mo Mumu muttered, "This is too simple. But since it's all done, you should comfort your little husband. Although you said he doesn't get along well with his parents, from what you've said, even though he's so stubborn in relationships, he must value family very much."
"It might not show on their face, but their behavior will definitely become terrible."
Is it bad?
For some reason, Mu Yiran felt a surge of emotion when she thought of Shi Youxi's final threats to her.
At that time, Shi Youxi was also feeling uneasy because of the death of his loved ones, which is why he said those things to her.
He wanted to get rid of her... or perhaps he wanted her to stay and keep him company?
And she didn't notice anything... she just left...
Suddenly, Shi Youxi's unusual behavior from yesterday resurfaced in her mind, and she quickly asked Mo Mumu, "Mumu, you said that someone who isn't in a good mental state sometimes suddenly seems like a completely different person..."
Mo Mumu: "Isn't this normal? When I'm not in a good mental state at work, I turn into a sluggish person!"
Mu Yiran: "..."
“…No, that’s not it…I meant my mental state wasn’t good, I meant I had a mental illness…” Mu Yiran carefully chose her words, “the kind where I’m taking medication.”
Mo Mumu seemed to have just arrived at the airport, and it was a bit noisy. She responded casually, "Oh, and then? That person was such a pervert."
Mu Yiran thought about Shi Youxi's state and described it as: "It's like his memories suddenly went backwards, and he became someone very similar to him in the past?"
"That might be related to the medication he's taking. Either he's been exposed to external stimuli, or he hasn't been taking his medication on time to control it."
“I’m not sure about the psychological aspects, but in terms of mental health, it depends on the specifics of his illness and whether it has become somatization.”
Mu Yiran hadn't expected this answer. Shi Youxi's condition at the time was too strange, but he had been taking his medication to control it, so it couldn't be ruled out that he had lost blood and fallen into a coma, and his body hadn't fully recovered, which might have caused his confusion...
"However, it's also possible that it's not to the point of mental illness. Patients with depression who don't have psychological issues that trigger physical symptoms may also experience this."
"Although this situation is not good either, it is at least much easier to treat than mental illness."
Mu Yiran quickly asked, "How do we treat it?"
Mo Mumu replied casually, "Isn't that what everyone says online? A good partner is like a therapist. Sometimes medication can't control things, but people and feelings can."
"But when a person needs to fantasize about being loved, that's a sign of mental instability, and I think they can't love anymore."
Mu Yiran was bewildered by her abrupt answer: "Why? Shouldn't he need more emotional support?"
Mo Mumu: "What if the person who promised to give you such feelings doesn't stick with it to the end?"
"…………"
Mu Yiran choked.
Didn't persevere...until the end?
Is it like she is now, towards Shi Youxi?
Mo Mumu didn't believe in such feelings. "Using love to cure an illness is like treating a mental illness that will last a lifetime. Unless the love continues, it will only make the person with the illness worse."
"In the end, either the sick person dies, or the sick person drags the healthy person to their death."
"…………"
"Who are you talking about? Do you have a mentally ill person around you? Which one? I don't know anyone like that. Hmm... Could it be..."
Mu Yiran's blood pressure suddenly dropped.
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