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Cai Wenchuan suddenly said to Ye Wenyu, "Xiaoyu, after my family moved when I was eighteen, we moved to that cabin in the woods. That year, I had just finished my college entrance exams, and the summer vacation was almost three months long, which was very long. That's when I met Lin Tingyue—"
The past is not like smoke.
Ye Wenyu was stunned. This was the first time Cai Wenchuan had taken the initiative to talk about the story of the two of them after they parted ways.
Cai Wenchuan said in a very painful voice: "At that time, my father was a driver for the Lin family, and my mother was a maid. Lin Tingxuan, who was Lin Tingyue's brother, was bossy to my father and always criticized my mother. I was very hurt. I never understood why I would give up my job as a worker in a state-owned factory to become someone else's servant. Why did I have to be the son of a servant?!"
Now that he is an adult, independent, and has been working for many years, he still cannot let go of his childhood experiences when he recalls them. He can't remain calm, and his voice still trembles slightly when he speaks.
Cai Wenchuan looked at the continuous drizzle outside the umbrella and continued, "Until I met Lin Tingyue, she didn't treat me like a servant at all. She told me all her secrets. She needed me very much and relied on me, just like you needed me when you were a child. She was very beautiful. When she was bullied by her older brothers, she would run to my room, climb up the camphor tree, and crawl into my bed to cry in my arms."
Ye Wenyu was stunned for a moment. Suddenly, she understood why Cai Wenchuan had become so obsessed. The son of a servant lived in constant inferiority and great pain. But suddenly, the young lady appeared and gave him complete trust and reliance. Her trust in him even exceeded that in her own family.
Cai Wenchuan continued in a hoarse voice, "You don't know how many sweltering summer nights I'd wake up to find a tiny person in my arms. At first, I was shocked and scared, almost thinking I was dreaming. Later, I got used to it, knowing it was her, and that there was no one else. Then, I started longing for her to appear. She said I was her only friend, and that everyone else in the Lin family had harmed her. Later, her parents divorced, and her father and older brother became even colder towards her. Her mother left without a word, leaving her even more pitiful, like an abandoned child. Her emotions worsened, and she didn't do well in school; she was a complete problem girl. No one in the Lin family could control her except me. She only listened to me."
Ye Wenyu listened silently. Cai Wenchuan, all those years, he was trapped in the complete trust and dependence of an ignorant and pitiful girl, wasn't he? Lin Tingyue was even more pitiful than him, although she was born into a wealthy family, no one ever loved her.
Time passed, and the two of them walked outside the girls' dormitory. The rain had stopped, and a full moon hung in the sky, its light as clear as water.
All around was quiet.
Cai Wenchuan closed his umbrella, composed himself, and said to Ye Wenyu, "I'm telling you all this tonight to explain the past and tell you why I'm obsessed. When I felt most worthless, it was this young lady who gave me confidence and strength. When I felt most unwanted, it was her appearance that told me she needed me. Her need, trust, respect, and reliance helped me emerge from immense pain and inferiority, making me ambitious, hardworking, and confident. That's how I was able to get into Q University with excellent grades, and then go on to get my master's and doctoral degrees before staying on to teach. I want her to know that she didn't trust the wrong person. I am the son of a servant, but I will be more successful than her two older brothers!"
Cai Wenchuan's tone became somewhat animated at this point, but quickly his voice lowered, his face contorted with pain. He said in a hoarse voice, "But last time at the hospital, she told Jiang Zhiming, 'Don't misunderstand, I'm the son of one of their servants, she could never love me.' That's when I finally woke up completely—"
Ye Wenyu finally understood Cai Wenchuan. At that moment, he stood before her, as transparent as crystal.
It's a very sad story. The son of a domestic worker, who is extremely insecure, lives a very sensitive, repressed, and painful life. Suddenly, a beautiful young lady, who looks like an angel, appears in his life and gives him all her trust and reliance. If she were Cai Wenchuan back then, she would probably be just as infatuated as he is.
Cai Wenchuan spoke slowly to Ye Wenyu in a pained voice, "Xiaoyu, I'm telling you this because I want to say goodbye to the past completely. I understand now that some things, no matter how hard one tries, cannot be changed. So the only thing to do is to stay away and forget, cut ties with the past, and start anew." His throat sounded extremely hoarse, as if he had suddenly developed a severe throat ailment.
Ye Wenyu had been silent until now, but she finally spoke. She nodded gently and said to him, "Wenchuan, I think you're right. We only have one life, so everyone is the protagonist of their own life. Why should we play a supporting role to others?"
Yes, why should someone who could be the protagonist play a supporting role? Why cry, hate, and get hurt in someone else's story?
Cai Wenchuan's heart skipped a beat. A supporting role? That word was truly apt. Xiaoyu was indeed a clever girl. Yes, his first half of life—his pitiful, insignificant first half. A few minutes later, his eyes reddened, and his nose stung. Yes, that's right, he had been her supporting role for over ten years! She never truly cared for him; she only thought of him after things went wrong. He wasn't even a backup plan, not even a supporting character; he was just a clown.
Xiaoyu said that being a supporting character was really giving him too much credit.
The little girl would only come to him when something happened. When her older brother scolded her and she cried, she would run to him, sobbing uncontrollably. When she was sick and no one was there to take care of her, she would ask him to take her to the hospital. When her mother and father argued, she would run to him in fear, asking what to do. When her mother suddenly went abroad and disappeared from her life, she would run to him, crying in panic. When the school called her parents because of her poor grades, she didn't dare ask her older brothers, so she could only come to him, asking him to impersonate her parent.
In his memory, she was always crying with tears in her eyes, a small girl, a girl who was so lovable, a girl who trusted him completely.
My heart aches as if it's being cut by a knife.
But later she got a boyfriend, one of his students, who also came from a poor family. However, in front of the student and in front of him, she hurriedly explained to him, "Don't misunderstand, he's the son of our maid. How could I possibly be with him—"
Recalling this, Cai Wenchuan felt as if his heart was being slowly sliced apart. He choked back tears and said, "So, Xiaoyu, can you give me a chance to start over—"
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