Chapter 41
You don't know who "they" refers to in Izo's words, but you still have a feeling that Izo kissed you. Does Izo like you? Or is he just playing a prank on you out of mischievousness?
You can't figure out the answer, but that doesn't stop you from retreating and creating distance between yourself and Izo. You should forget that this exquisitely beautiful and makeup-savvy person in front of you is a pirate you need to be wary of.
Seeing that you were hiding from him, he didn't insist on shortening the distance between you, but instead let out a soft laugh in a good mood.
"So you're not the type to just pretend to be stupid all the time."
They've already kissed; how can you pretend nothing's wrong? And Yizang, understanding the meaning behind your expression, gave you a smile that could bewitch anyone. Unfortunately, you're no longer susceptible to his beauty.
"Sorry, I wasn't joking. I just felt that if I didn't take action soon, you might start to ignore what I said."
Izo's words reminded you of that night's "like." Because you intentionally ignored Izo's suggestive words, and since he didn't do anything excessive, you took his "like" that night as a spur-of-the-moment prank. Now it seems you overdid it.
Even so, you still can't face this feeling. Rather, it's the feeling of being manipulated when you're with Izang, and your current experiences that make you unwilling to think about these issues.
Seeing that Yizang was getting up and seemed to be helping you up, you reached out and made a "stop" gesture. Under Yizang's astonished gaze, you stood up on your own and took a few steps back as quickly as possible.
"I'm still a bit disoriented, let's keep our distance for now."
Because Izang's location is on the only way to the door, after you finished speaking, you stood there trying to convey to Izang through your eyes that you wanted to leave. As for why you didn't say it aloud, it's because you just said something that sounded like a rejection to Izang, and you were afraid that a casual remark would anger him.
Even if Izo doesn't seem to be that kind of person based on your daily interactions, it doesn't stop you from being careful.
As it turns out, Izang was not a petty person. On the contrary, he laughed as if he was amused by your reaction, and while laughing, he made way for you to the door and turned to the side, giving you a sense of security through his actions.
"Don't worry, I won't do anything to you."
Izang's consistent words and actions were very convincing. Eager to leave the dressing room, you didn't have the energy to think about anything else. After quickly passing by Izang, who had his back to you, you whispered your thanks and fled the room that had made you panic, leaving Izang alone in the room.
Only after the door to the room closed again did Izou, who was facing the wall, turn around, look at the closed door, and smile.
"Although the result wasn't good, it's better than letting her continue to pretend to be stupid."
From this moment on, whether he gets close to you or pursues you, you will no longer treat him as an ordinary friend, and you will no longer hesitate for fear of your relationship deteriorating.
-
Led by the islanders, you arrived at the altar they had built. Something that should have been known only to Marco, Izo, and the islanders was somehow leaked, and crew members of the Whitebeard Pirates, who had only recently left, arrived in small groups.
The one who reacted the most was Ace, who rushed out from what looked like a crowd of people watching a performance. He seemed so anxious that when his fellow crew members teased him for being impulsive and reckless, Ace ignored them and instead grabbed their hands, eagerly asking what he had heard.
Why did you—
Before Ace could reveal what happened that night, you put your index finger to his lips, trying to calm him down amidst his stunned expression.
“You know Ace, I’m good at doing what I can.”
After spending half a year together, Ace has gained some understanding of your personality, but he still remembers the expression and tone of your voice when you talked about those things, and he still tries to persuade you to give up.
"Can,"
You are genuinely grateful to have a friend like Ace who cares about you so much on this vast ocean. That's why you need to confront the past that keeps you up at night, especially since those things will never happen again.
“That’s part of my past. I can’t let it weigh me down and prevent me from moving forward, can I?”
After realizing that you had made up your mind, the look of worry on Ace's face was replaced by a complaining gaze.
"You really don't listen to advice."
You don't deny that. It was precisely because you wouldn't listen to advice that you left Alabasta, met the Red-Haired Pirates, and eventually joined the Whitebeard Pirates.
As you responded to Ace's condemnation, a slight smile appeared on your lips, and you began to recount the unfinished heart-to-heart talk from that night.
"I remember, Ace still has something he hasn't told me. If you're really worried, why don't you think about how you're going to tell me later?"
Ace's expression faltered slightly as he looked away and muttered, "...I'll consider it after the prayer is over."
If you don't reply to Ace, after the islanders have arranged the necessary items, you walk onto the makeshift altar.
Thump, thump—
As you get closer to the altar, your increasingly rapid heartbeat drowns out the chatter of the islanders praying for blessings, as well as the laughter of the pirates watching from the sidelines.
Due to time and limited resources, only a few drums could be used to play music, and the only drumming techniques available were those few chilling rhythms. But you know this time is different. You weren't pushed onto the pedestal; you came up there willingly.
As the drumbeats begin, the muscle memory of the movement compels you to pick up your fan and dance to the rhythm of the drums with curiosity and reverence.
The slow yet dignified movements continued as the atmosphere gradually quieted down. Tension, unease, and fear seemed to gradually fade from your thoughts with each step you took, the height of your raised hand, and the sound of the firewood burning.
You can't see the faces and expressions of the people below the altar, nor can you hear their voices; all you hear is the monotonous drumbeat and the slight rustling of wide sleeves. The gradually returning heartbeat to its normal rhythm is proof that you are no longer afraid of the past.
Now it seems that the "nightmare" that keeps you awake on countless nights is nothing more than this.
-
Izang knew all too well that his appearance was deceptive. No matter how handsome his face was, his possessiveness and aggression could not be erased.
Seeing you on stage, dancing with an ethereal, otherworldly grace, and the crimson hue that graced your eyes, I couldn't help but feel a pang of regret. I regretted making you so beautiful that you seemed inhuman, and letting you step onto that high platform that was so distant from them.
Even if Izang doesn't know your past, he can tell what kind of past you've experienced just from your reaction to the drumbeats and the muscle memory you've developed.
But you didn't dwell on the past; instead, you chose to face it, even walking through the swamp where hesitation would have plunged you into the mire without looking up. You are not a god, but you possess an extraordinary will.
It wasn't just him who adorned you with crimson, but also his brother who had a strong liking for you. Sachi, who hadn't taken his eyes off you since you started praying, and Harta, who took a half-step back when you inadvertently looked up, seemed both regretful and admiring of you.
As for your youngest sibling, who is closest to you, it seems they are watching you from a distance.
Pirates have never believed in gods, but at this moment, Izo is willing to temporarily believe that gods exist in the world.
However, the gods on the stage seem to have forgotten one thing: gods who descend to earth, or even those from pirate worlds, will only keep their rejected suitors coming back for more.
As for the inviolability of gods? He never said he would worship you as a god.
-
Compared to you, who was praying for blessings, the pirates watching seemed to react more strongly. When you approached them, they seemed to doubt your presence. It wasn't until Ace came out and said with a grin, "So you can do more than just cut off your thumb," that the pirates, who had been stunned, regained their energy and burst into laughter at your blushing face.
"That's more like it! I knew that was who scared me!"
"I still know her best like this. I didn't even dare to breathe just now!"
"Yes, yes, you almost fainted because you forgot to breathe."
So the crew members, who were chatting and laughing, started to fight while teasing each other. You, who were used to their occasional squabbling, just smiled silently and followed the grateful islander to the bathing room to change out of the clothes and accessories that were not conducive to your movement.
Perhaps worried that you might encounter the same thing as before, you changed into your own clothes and came out to find Ace waiting for you.
Ace is much quieter when he's not around. When your eyes meet, Ace, who usually uses a smile to mask his true feelings, doesn't force himself, which makes you feel somewhat relieved, and your footsteps toward him become much lighter.
"Aren't you going to drink with Marco and the others?"
"I promised you before I prayed that I wouldn't go tonight."
Ace's purpose for coming was revealed in a single sentence, and you are glad that he is willing to have a heart-to-heart talk with you.
You found a relatively quiet corner and sat on a rock big enough for two people. Amidst the sounds of laughter and conversation not far away, Ace began to talk about the past that you didn't know.
"I am the son of the Pirate King, and those who hate the Pirate King call me the 'Child of the Devil.' Although I don't like this name, just like you said, this is my past, and I can't erase it no matter what I do."
Ace paused for a moment, trying to get a positive or negative response from you regarding his topic. But you just looked at him, maintaining a faint smile, gesturing for him to continue.
For some reason, Ace was upset. He turned his head away and continued speaking in a muffled voice.
“Even though I know my dad and everyone else treat me very well, I can’t help but wonder, would the people who call me brother now still treat me this way after they know about my past?”
"Does everything I have now deserve who I am?"
The hand beside you is clenched into a fist until the veins on the back of the hand bulge, as if it is questioning itself or suppressing the grief and indignation in its heart.
In an atmosphere so quiet you could hear the drunken crew making jokes, Ace, who was the first to lose patience, turned to look at you, a blush appearing on his adorable freckled face.
"I've said so much, what are you going to say?"
After hearing Ace's words, you realized he had already finished speaking; no wonder it had been quiet for so long. You nodded to indicate you understood, and then, under Ace's seemingly reproachful gaze, you shared your thoughts.
"Actually, I don't even know the full name of the 'Pirate King' you mentioned. So when Ace said 'Child of the Devil,' my first thought was that it was some kind of Devil Fruit."
Ace, who had been anxiously awaiting a reply, relaxed his straight back as soon as you answered.
"You really are..."
As for whether what you currently possess is worthy of you, my answer is—
You drawled out the last syllable, a sly smile appearing in Ace's shining eyes.
"I don't know either."
Ace, tense yet expectant, turned cold, his eyes reflecting your image revealing undisguised hurt.
"Are you kidding me?!"
You smiled and shook your head, and before Ace could leave in a fit of anger, you grasped his hand, which was bleeding from gripping it too tightly.
"Because I am not Ace, and I don't know what your definition of 'worthy' is."
"But I know one thing: whether it's family or friends, there will be times when they disagree or have conflicting opinions. Sometimes, instead of just guessing, it's more efficient to directly ask the other person what they're thinking."
Perhaps what you said was a bit disjointed, and Ace, who hadn't quite grasped the meaning yet, was still thinking about it, until Ace looked at you and asked you in an uncertain tone whether his answer was correct.
"Just like what you said to me that night?"
You paused for a moment, then remembered what you had told Ace that night: "I was worried about you." Realizing that Ace had taken your words to heart, a warm feeling welled up in your chest.
Yes, I'm very worried about you.
Caught completely off guard, Ace's eyes widened in disbelief at your sudden retelling of what happened that night.
"I didn't ask you to say it again—forget it, I feel like you've ruined my mood again after all that effort."
"Shall I help you tidy up a bit more?"
Upon seeing your teasing smile, Ace belatedly stood up, his face slightly flushed, and distanced himself from you.
"No!"
Looking at Ace, who is more emotionally expressive, you realize that the Ace in front of you, who has a childlike nature and sometimes throws tantrums, is the one who hides behind Ace's smile, a younger version of himself who needs to be cared for.
Continue read on readnovelmtl.com
