Chapter 310 Your Majesty, I am pregnant and unable to serve you.
They said different things.
But what was deep in those eyes was exactly the same...
use.
Extraction.
Narcissus slowly lowered her head and looked at her slightly protruding belly.
A life is being nurtured here.
It is her flesh and blood.
But in Emperor Zhaoheng's eyes... and in everyone else's eyes...
This is the imperial heir, the successor to the throne, and this is where her value as empress lies.
What happens once that value is exhausted?
What if she can no longer have children, gets old, and her beauty fades?
Narcissus's eyes grew colder and colder.
"Your Majesty, this place is cold and damp; it is not advisable to linger here," the guard whispered a reminder.
Narcissus seemed not to hear.
She stood there, watching the old woman being helped back to the stone steps by the guards.
After the old woman sat down, she began humming that off-key tune again. This time, it was clear that it was a palace lament from a previous dynasty:
"Her beauty has not faded, yet her affections have already ended; she leans against the incense burner, sitting until dawn..."
The sound gradually faded and dispersed.
Narcissus slowly turned around and walked out of the desolate courtyard, step by step.
She walked to the outer wall of the Cold Palace, to the withered old locust tree.
She raised her hand, her fingertips touching the nine-phoenix pearl hairpin in her hair.
The golden phoenix was cold, and the pearl in the east shone with a dazzling light in the setting sun.
The words Emperor Zhaoheng spoke to her this morning when he put the hairpin in her hair still echoed in her ears:
“This belongs to the Empress Dowager and the Emperor Taizu… I think you are more deserving of it than the Empress Dowager.”
Match it.
She is worthy of the position of Empress.
She was to bear him children.
She is worthy to be the mother of his heir to the throne.
Narcissus grasped the hair ornament and slowly, yet forcefully, pulled it from her hair.
She lowered her eyes, looking at the golden hairpin in her palm.
Nine phoenixes circle around, their pearls gleaming, symbolizing the supreme honor of the empress.
But at this moment, it only made her feel cold.
From afar came the calls of palace servants searching for her, growing louder as they approached.
Narcissus closed her eyes and took a deep breath.
When I opened my eyes again, they were filled with a deep, deathly stillness.
She gripped the hairpin tightly and tucked it into her sleeve.
He turned around and walked step by step toward the Qianqing Palace.
——
When Narcissus returned to the Qianqing Palace, dusk had completely fallen.
As the palace lanterns were lit inside, their warm yellow glow bathed the smooth, golden brick floor, creating a cozy atmosphere.
The moment she stepped across the threshold, the palace maids waiting by the door all knelt down and bowed.
"Her Majesty is back."
Tinglu stepped forward, took the cloak that she had taken off, and saw that her face was pale, with a hint of worry flashing in her eyes.
Tinglu whispered in Shuixian's ear, "His Majesty has ordered that dinner be served in the warm pavilion, and all of your favorite dishes will be included."
"His Majesty is still discussing matters in the Imperial Study. He said you can have some snacks first, and there's no need to wait."
Narcissus gave a faint "hmm" and walked towards the inner hall.
Under Tinglu's worried gaze, Shuixian walked into the inner hall and dismissed the palace servants who were serving there.
Before the dressing table, a bronze mirror reflected her face.
Her face was somewhat pale, and her lips were also pale, but the dignified and graceful demeanor that belonged to the Empress between her brows and eyes seemed to be deeply ingrained in her bones.
Narcissus looked at herself in the mirror for a long time, then reached out and took out the Nine Phoenixes Holding Pearls hairpin from her sleeve.
The golden phoenix was cold, while the pearl shimmered with a warm glow under the lamp.
She slowly inserted it into her hair bun, adjusting the angle so that the phoenix-shaped pearl hung precisely on her forehead.
The movements were steady, with not a tremor in the fingertips.
After putting on the hairpin, she picked up the rouge box, dipped her fingertip in a little crimson, and gently dabbed it on her lips.
The person in the mirror suddenly gained some color, no longer so frighteningly pale.
After doing all this, she got up and walked towards the warm pavilion.
The warm pavilion was already properly furnished. A round table was covered with an apricot-yellow brocade tablecloth, and in the center was a white jade incense burner, from which the rich fragrance of ambergris was released.
Eight dishes were served in succession: stewed pigeon, crab meat lion's head meatballs, braised goose breast, stir-fried seafood...
As emperor and empress, according to ancestral rules, they could not have any favorite dishes.
However, looking at the dishes served today, they were all, without exception, the flavors she preferred during her pregnancy.
Shui Xian knew she hadn't given any orders, so there was only one possibility... Emperor Zhaoheng had someone prepare it.
The plate of crab meat lion's head meatballs was placed in front of her usual seat, one for each person, served in a small celadon bowl. The broth was clear, the meatballs were round, and a small pinch of crab roe was placed on top.
Shui Xian remembered that during yesterday's meal, she had casually mentioned that she suddenly missed crab meat lion's head meatballs, which had not been made in the palace for a long time.
He forgot what he said as soon as he said it.
But he remembered.
She lowered her eyes, sat down at the table, and didn't touch her chopsticks.
About fifteen minutes later, footsteps could be heard from outside.
Emperor Zhaoheng stepped into the warm pavilion. His bright yellow court robes had been changed into his usual indigo casual clothes, with only a dark black belt around his waist. It was as if he had shed his imperial appearance, and he looked unrestrained and handsome.
Having removed his imperial crown, he appeared much more relaxed.
"Have you been waiting long?"
He walked quickly to her side, naturally leaned down and kissed her cheek before sitting down beside her.
The palace servants who were attending to Emperor Zhaoheng kept their eyes downcast and showed no surprise, as if they were no longer surprised by what they were seeing.
"The Ministry of War is being a bit long-winded, insisting on clarifying the details of border trade. I told them we'd discuss it another day, but those old ministers just wouldn't let it go."
His tone carried a hint of complaint, but it sounded more like an ordinary husband rambling on about trivial matters outside to his wife.
As he spoke, he picked up his silver chopsticks, placed a slice of goose breast on the plate in front of her, and said, "Try it. The goose breast is quite good today. I specially asked them to put less yellow wine in it because you don't like a strong taste of wine."
Shuixian picked up her chopsticks, put the piece of goose breast into her mouth, and chewed it slowly.
Indeed, there was no strong smell of alcohol, the meat was tender and juicy, and the soy sauce flavor was just right.
"tasty."
She said softly.
Emperor Zhaoheng smiled, his eyebrows and eyes relaxing, and scooped another spoonful of pigeon soup into her bowl: "Drink more soup, Pei Jichuan said you need to nourish yourself now."
As he served her food, he spoke of the day's arrangements: "I have ordered the Imperial Household Department to prepare for the autumn hunt. The imperial palace in the western hunting grounds of Beijing has been well taken care of, so you can stay there as soon as you arrive."
"You are pregnant now and it is not advisable for you to ride horses or shoot arrows, but you can stay in the imperial palace and enjoy the scenery. Yongning has been talking about wanting to learn archery for a long time, so this time I will teach her myself."
As he spoke, he turned his head to look at her, his eyes filled with tenderness.
"Although Qingyan and Qinghe can't walk very well now, they can still ride horses with their master. Those two boys are cooped up in the palace all day long; we can't let them get bored..."
Narcissus listened quietly, occasionally nodding or responding with a soft "hmm".
Inside the warm room, the charcoal fire burned brightly, filling the air with the aroma of ambergris. The rising steam from the food blurred their faces.
Everything was so warm and inviting that it felt almost unreal.
Emperor Zhaoheng, getting carried away with the conversation, reached out and took her hand, which was resting on her lap. His palm was warm. "Xian'er, after this child is born and the weather gets warmer, shall we go for a trip to Jiangnan?"
He gently stroked the back of her hand with his fingertips, his tone full of longing: "Haven't you always wanted to see West Lake? Spring Dawn on Su Causeway, Snow on Broken Bridge... I'll take you on a private visit, just the two of us, no one else."
Emperor Zhaoheng's smile carried a warmth of longing.
"Rent a painted boat, stay on the lake for a few days, listen to the rain, drink tea, and watch the lotus flowers. Wherever you want to go, we'll go."
He spoke earnestly, as if the misty, rainy Jiangnan region and the time spent listening to the rain on painted boats were already a future within reach.
Narcissus lowered her eyes, looking at the two clasped hands.
His palms were large and warm, with calluses on his fingertips from years of holding pens and bows, yet at this moment they gently enveloped her fingers, carefully, as if holding a fragile treasure.
She suddenly remembered the withered, bony hands of the old, mad concubine in the cold palace, and the crazed look in her eyes when she screamed.
Narcissus didn't think she was crazy; on the contrary, she felt sorry for her from the bottom of her heart.
This harem imprisons women; even if they start out normal, they'll eventually go mad!
The slight wavering in my heart, stirred by the warmth of the cozy room, instantly froze into ice.
She slowly raised her eyes and looked at Emperor Zhaoheng's gentle, smiling profile.
Then, she used a little force to gently pull her hand back.
Emperor Zhaoheng was taken aback.
Narcissus picked up a silk handkerchief and wiped the corner of her lips, her posture as elegant as ever.
She raised her eyes, her gaze calm as she looked at him, and spoke slowly, like an empress addressing a king:
"Your Majesty, the harem is currently empty, and I have heard that the court officials still have reservations about it?"
Emperor Zhaoheng's smile faded slightly, but he didn't think much of it, assuming she was just worried about the state of affairs.
"It's just the same old tune."
He spoke casually, picked up his chopsticks again to serve her food, his handsome profile adorned with a smile, bathed in a soft, almost ethereal golden light by the setting sun outside the window.
"The Zheng faction has been eliminated. The rest of them only murmur among themselves, and no one dares to speak out in court. Xian'er, there is no need to worry. Since I have issued the decree, no one is allowed to discuss the selection of concubines again."
He spoke with unwavering certainty, carrying the authoritative air of an emperor who brooked no questioning.
Narcissus listened quietly, and only put down her silver chopsticks after he finished speaking.
The silver chopsticks rested on the celadon chopstick rest, making a very soft sound.
She gently adjusted the phoenix hairpin in her hair; the pearl swayed and felt cool against her forehead.
Then, she raised her head, adopting the standard posture of an empress addressing a monarch, her back straight, her hands folded on her knees, and her gaze calmly meeting Emperor Zhaoheng's eyes.
The candlelight flickered in the warm room, casting interplay of light and shadow on her face.
She spoke, her voice calm and even, as if she were stating a perfectly ordinary matter concerning the palace.
"Your Majesty, I am pregnant and unable to serve you. For the sake of the imperial heir and the stability of the nation..."
She paused, then enunciated each word clearly and forcefully:
"Your Majesty, please select virtuous ladies to enrich the harem."
The moment the words fell, it seemed as if the air in the warm pavilion had frozen.
The palace servants standing by froze, holding their breath, heads bowed, wishing they could shrink into the ground.
The silver spoon in the hands of the eunuch in charge of serving the dishes was suspended in mid-air, and the soup dripped back into the bowl one drop at a time, making a soft sound.
Da, da.
Dead silence.
A suffocating silence.
The smile on Emperor Zhaoheng's face gradually froze and then peeled away inch by inch, like shattered ice.
He stared at Narcissus, whose long, narrow eyes, which were always full of gentle smiles, were now unfathomable, filled only with incredulous astonishment and a kind of undercurrent that was rapidly building up.
"……What did you say?"
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